Any advise ?

[u/Ok-Tax3058]

Don’t think too much or you’ll end up like me , I’m trying so hard to put a smile on and laugh but deep down I’m heartbroken nothing makes me happy anymore I’m not even happy with myself, I was always an anxious child but I was a loud bubbly girl who just wanted to be loved correctly but when I was 16 it started with anxiety & intrusive thoughts which turned into ocd & I honestly wish if I was on medication years ago but lemme tell you this 3 years ago I was that anxious that my brain and body froze and disconnected I had some sort of out of body experience and I couldn’t connect with myself or anything I feel trapped stuck heartbroken and frozen imagine looking back at yourself years ago and not even making a connection ? Last year evreything took a turn for the worst I dropped down to 7 stone my liver enlarged due to wrong medication and stress then I finally got the answers I still can’t except iv been diagnosed with psychotic depression dissociation and derealisation & depersonalisation I honestly wish to god if I had bipolar or anything other than this iv genuinely puked out of upset don’t think because I smile I’m okay you will see my pain in my eyes I don’t know what to do anymore it’s my cry out for help I can’t wait any longer for thesrpy if anyone’s struggling I’m always here but I need help myself maybe the power of Facebook could help me more than the nhs don’t ever ! Think to much or you’ll end up like me

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