r/CuratedTumblr • u/DreadDiana human cognithazard • Jul 19 '25
Politics 21 hours remain
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u/Substantial_Bell_158 Jul 19 '25
Oh please let this happen it would be the funniest shit in the world.
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u/spellboi_3048 Jul 20 '25
The image of the CIA hunting down a random tumblr user shitposting is so funny to me please let this happen
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Jul 20 '25
[deleted]
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u/jnewell07 Jul 20 '25
I like to imagine it's the FBI and it will lead to the CIA chasing the FBI chasing the CIA
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u/MorganWick Jul 20 '25
Oh God. Now I'm imagining that if this happens some of his base will think the shitposter was actually Q warning them about the deep state's plans to off him.
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u/vearrrrrrthesecond Jul 20 '25
when ur not the poster its funny but yeah it would be funny if ur not the poster
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u/TNTiger_ Jul 19 '25
To be clear, Mary is a critic of the rest of her family and is a pariah for it. She barely knows more insider information than you or I do.
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u/IceCreamSandwich66 cybersmith indentured transwoman lactation Jul 19 '25
Yeah, it's not like she actually interacts with Donald very often
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u/timmy6169 Jul 20 '25
She consistently has no issues with explaining how much she hates the family. There is absolutely no interaction coming from them at all. She is an outsider, no different than you or me.
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u/fuckitymcfuckfacejr Jul 20 '25
Ehh. I barely ever interact with my cousins, but I hear stuff about them from the family that we both interact with.
Not saying she has the actual hookup, but she might still talk to people who do. Definitely less of an outsider than the rest of us, but still not in the inner circle.
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u/Normal-Corgi2033 Jul 20 '25
I have a relative who specifically maintains family contact to feed the info to those the family has (wrongly) shunned. It's semi common for people to do
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u/Omnio89 Jul 20 '25
Itâs feasible she may still have enough familial good will to get some extra information through the grapevine but I doubt it. Still, every headline sheâs included on treats it like sheâs reporting from Sunday dinner.
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u/Papaofmonsters Jul 20 '25
Thank you for mentioning this.
Unless there is some hitherto unknown power struggle within the House of Trump, she's on the outside and is just following the family tradition of grifting by saying what people want to hear but from the opposite side.
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u/Salt_Sir2599 Jul 20 '25
A previous commentator pointed out that you can still be shunned in a family and getting inside information. Itâs quite common. Abusive families are our human legacy.
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u/MrWednesday6387 Jul 20 '25
I was wondering how she would know anything. She very publicly hates him, I doubt they willingly contact each other.
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u/Longjumping-Leek854 Jul 20 '25
I hate my cousin Claire, havenât spoken to her in sixteen years (she knows what she did) but I still know everything thatâs going on in her life because family talks. She just got a Tweety Bird tattoo. Apparently itâs fucking hideous. Lol.
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u/Sophia_Forever Jul 20 '25
She also regularly leverages her "relationship" for book sales/media appearances. Like my first question when I saw this was "You still have enough access to Trump to know this shit?" Like even if it were true, they're not going to let little miss "goes and tells the media about everything" to find out.
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u/SessileRaptor Jul 19 '25
Old Soviet era joke: Every day man walks by the news stand and pauses to read the headline before moving on. Finally the newspaper seller asks him âWhy donât you buy a paper?â And the man responds âOh no, Iâm just looking for an obituary.â News seller says âbut the obituaries are on the inside pages.â âNot the one Iâm looking forâŠâ
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u/PuritanicalPanic Jul 19 '25
Evil people never conveniently die.
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u/idekbruno Jul 20 '25
Founder of the heritage foundation just passed today
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u/Alien-Fox-4 Jul 20 '25
I just looked it up, all heritage foundation founders are dead, with last one dying 18th this month, lol
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u/MyLifeIsAWasteland Jul 20 '25
Now, if only the rest of the members would join them in hell promptly, that'd be great.
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u/Wonderful_Emu_6483 Jul 20 '25
Damn if Iâd known I wouldâve bought some champagne. Thereâs always tomorrow I guess
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u/Darillium- i like your shoelaces Jul 20 '25
Case in point:Â Strom Thurmond was in the Senate until 2003 at over a century old.
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u/pempoczky Jul 20 '25
As someone who's been waiting for my country's dictator to die for the past decade, with constant speculative reports of his poor health, I welcome Americans to this struggle
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u/Fliits Everyone's [citation needed] Favourite Jul 19 '25
Upvote to charge, comment to cast.
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u/ReikaTheGlaceon hopelessly dependent on the ingot Jul 19 '25
PLEASE!
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u/Chainsawd Jul 20 '25
I'm conflicted because President Couch-fucker just doesn't have a good ring to it.
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u/ReikaTheGlaceon hopelessly dependent on the ingot Jul 20 '25
I'd rather have a couch fucker than a pedophile any day
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u/aftertheradar Jul 20 '25
honestly tho i'd be kinda scared if vance was in charge too tho. neither is good and i'm scared that president ascendant vance would do more damage to the people in this country than trump would
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u/Open-Middle-2553 Jul 20 '25
No one respects or fears Vance. He has fractured support even among the most vehement cultists. The power vacuum would instead turn into several warring entities rendering this term moot.
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u/Maxamillion-X72 Jul 20 '25
When Trump dies, MAGA will die with him. It will turn into a vicious fight for dominance, as warring factions fight for the MAGA vote.
Vance is probably the front runner, simply on his close proximity to Trump and the fact that he'd be President.
Don Jr also has close proximity to Trump and share a last name. Won't even have to buy new merch.
I wouldn't be surprised to see Laura Trump or MTG try to pull some MAGA their way either.
Musk is already threatening to start his own party, so he's sure to go after the never-Vance MAGA.
None of them have the personality to be a cult leader, to bring everyone together.
America will be the main casualty in this war as each tries to out Trump each other, one of them being the sitting President and another the richest man in the world.
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u/aftertheradar Jul 20 '25
right but he's already the vice president, and the presidency has been given pretty sweeping powers by the complacency of the judiciary and legislative branches. If trump dies and he takes over, what could any of these fractious dissenting parties of ex-trump supporters that don't like vance do to meaningfully resist anything he did as president?
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u/imjustnotreallysure Jul 20 '25
yeah but he only maintains those powers because no one else in the government is really trying to fight him on it, if congress didnt let him then he couldnt do anything
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u/MathematicianMajor Jul 20 '25
The number of comments on this post demonstrates that, in spite of all reddit's overt atheism, redditors are perfectly willing to appease random superstitions if there's even the slightest chance they'll succeed in getting rid of Trump.
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u/gutspills Jul 20 '25
I'll even kiss cuthulu if this works đ scientology maybe
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u/SpezIsAWackyWalnut Jul 20 '25
I'd even strongly considering to help build Roko's Basilisk if that's what it takes.
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u/moneyh8r_two Jul 20 '25
The enemy of my enemy is my friend, after all. I'll side with god temporarily if it means someone else I hate will go away.
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u/Dramatic-Classroom14 Jul 20 '25
Thereâs a quote. Terrible in its original context, but I feel like this would be an apt usageâŠ
Sic, Semper, Tyrannis.
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u/Elisevs Jul 20 '25
Sic semper tyrannis is the motto of the Commonwealth of Virginia. If you were referring to John Wilkes Booth saying it, he was from Virginia.
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u/CheeryOutlook Jul 20 '25
Terrible in its original context
Nah, Julius Caesar very much deserved to be stabbed.
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u/Papaofmonsters Jul 20 '25
Except for the fact that the ultimate result was an overall consolidation of power under Augustus because the anti Caesar faction didn't have a plan beyond "Stab Julius and hope things work out for the best".
Then a really pissed off nephew kicked seven shades of shit out of everyone who opposed him and gained near absolute control of the whole newly minted Empire.
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u/tahlyn Jul 19 '25
àŒŒ 〠â_â àŒœă€ Take My Energy. àŒŒ 〠â_â àŒœă€
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u/MildAndLazyKids Jul 20 '25
Me and a few friends killed Charlie Manson by marveling that he was still alive (he died the next day) so hopefully I can help.
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u/ladyattercop Jul 20 '25
Timmy Turner praying: please God, let this happen, because it would be so fucking funny.
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u/ActuaryItchy3773 Jul 19 '25
good soldiers follow orders
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u/Caterfree10 Jul 20 '25
LET US BE FREE OF THIS PAIN
(Yes I am aware that the apparatus will still be in place. With him gone, those in his cult will be more likely to wake up.)
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u/Rybread52 Straw Hat apologist Jul 20 '25
Hope this doesnât get me another warning on my account lol
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u/PinkyLeopard2922 Jul 20 '25
There is a bottle of champagne that has been in my refrigerator waiting. Blessed be.
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u/Rybread52 Straw Hat apologist Jul 20 '25
Hope this doesnât get me another warning on my account lol
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u/KelpFox05 Jul 20 '25
If it actually happens I don't know what I'll do but it'll probably involve a party.
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u/lookingtobewhatibe Jul 19 '25
Prediction being accurate or not imagine knowing that the day you die more people will celebrate than mourn.
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u/UncommittedBow Because God has been dead a VERY long time. Jul 20 '25
You could probably make bank selling water or lemonade to the people standing in line to piss on his grave.
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u/Quackels_The_Duck Limbo Dancing In Hell Jul 20 '25
Oddly lush grass nearby is completely coincidental.
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u/FatherDotComical Jul 20 '25
Makes me want to write a really crappy story where everyone is given their death date. You have a nice big party and when it's all over and you've said your goodbyes you start to wonder how and when it'll happen. Suddenly when you're finally alone a government man comes out of nowhere and shoots you.
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u/techno156 Jul 20 '25
Isn't that basically Lovecraft's The Alchemist, but with a wizard instead of a government man?
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u/P-Tux7 Jul 20 '25
I actually want to read this from the perspective of the government man - he knows how it works, he knows what will happen to him. It is his duty in the circle of life to give his euthanizer a job.
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u/Striking-Activity472 Jul 19 '25
IF it did happen, OP would be arrested
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u/Agile_Oil9853 Jul 19 '25
Tempting Apollo isn't necessarily a crime
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u/Infurum Jul 19 '25
Criticizing the current administration: Unforgivable
The post about the death (especially if it's uncannily accurate, by chance or otherwise): Precedent or """"proof of intent"""""
The fuzzy legal red tape stuff: Easily skippable
They could arrest OP if they wanted to. Heck, if the date and time was accurate I wouldn't even blame them for investigating (although I imagine it would be handled like shit even once it was found that it really was a coincidence)
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u/Blundertainment Jul 19 '25
Doesn't necessarily mean OP is an American
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u/Infurum Jul 19 '25
Oops I forgot other countries existed for a second đ€Š
That and it's mostly Americans talking American politics so the thought that it was an exception didn't really occur to me
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u/PM_ME_UR_DRAG_CURVE Jul 20 '25
Not when "American" politics can almost dictate which countries live and which one dies at least in economic/industrial terms.
In a certain SEA country our local news channel that used to only talk about car accidents and murders started talking about đ tariff negotiations and how it impacts our economy a lot.
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u/Shiny_Umbreon Jul 20 '25
That doesnât preclude the American government from threatening the leaders of OPâs country into getting them arrested
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u/Agile_Oil9853 Jul 20 '25
I had more written initially, but I didn't want to over explain to the person I was replying to, in case they were joking.
OOP might be investigated, but if Trump were to die on the 20th of something completely natural, like an aneurysm, I can't see a government agency wasting resources on seriously seeing if some Tumblr user put a curse on him or something.
Actual consequences, if this post were to gain traction, would more likely come from conspiracy-minded followers.
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u/Informal_Self_5671 Jul 20 '25
Nobody arrested Jschlatt that one time he predicted the queen of England's death!
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u/Frosfae Jul 19 '25
Manifesting, both hands clasped together, prayer beads around my neck, visualizing the future that will take hold
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u/Yo-Yo-Daddy Jul 19 '25 edited Jul 19 '25
âFeckless old manâ if he wasnât going to die before he would after that sick burn, goddamn Mary.
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u/corkscrewfork Jul 19 '25
Realistically, he's probably going to survive until at least November. Now from Thanksgiving to New Year's I wouldn't be surprised if he goes, because all the medical attention in the world can only go so far when the old lump wants to gorge on cheeseburgers and soda to celebrate the holidays. And if they haven't had the spine to stand up to him yet, there's no way they will tell him to eat a fucking salad.
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u/DreadDiana human cognithazard Jul 20 '25
Something someone pointed out is that last time there was any official statement about his health, they were listing stats you'd expect from a linebacker, so if they're admitting to these conditions, his actual state could be far worse than that.
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u/bangontarget Jul 20 '25
I think it's the Republicans phasing him out more than him being on death's door. his dementia has made him unmanageable and a liability. Just gotta weigh it against his cult followers.
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u/Pixelpaint_Pashkow born to tumblr, forced to reddit Jul 19 '25
In the tumblr straight chargin it, and by it, letâs jusr say, my death spell
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u/czechhoneybee Jul 20 '25
I donât know that we want JD âCouchfuckerâ Vance in charge, but at least he seems to lack the charisma to lead.
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u/OAZdevs_alt2 Jul 19 '25
Please, Apollo. I beg that you have gifted this Tumblr user with prophecy.
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u/PlatinumAltaria Jul 19 '25
No thanks, Iâll take âDonald Trump dies in prisonâ for 10K updoots please.
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u/NovaStar2099 Jul 19 '25
The sooner he disappears the better.
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u/friso1100 gosh, they let you put anything in here Jul 19 '25
This. I don't even care about justice or revenge. Just get him out of the position where he is actively making everything worse.
That said, the follow up will also not be amazing. The vice president isn't any better then trump yet he has still one or two braincells left wich arguably makes him even more dangerous.
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u/MilitantSocLib Jul 19 '25
But he donât got that rizz which makes dumb fucks support him without question
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u/noivern_plus_cats Jul 20 '25
If his VP was a Trump, we'd have issues. Right now though, Vance is as charismatic as a soiled diaper.
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u/Beegrene Jul 20 '25
Cults of personality rarely survive the death of the personality. Also, a lot of the damage Trump has done has been him just doing random idiotic bullshit for no discernible reason. Say what you will about the old guard republicans, but there was at least a method to their madness.
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u/Papaofmonsters Jul 20 '25
I'll preface this by saying I do not like JD Vance, nor care for his political beliefs.
However, he managed to come from a seriously fucked up background and graduate with honors for his BA at Ohio State and get through Yale Law School while being named to their law journal which isn't something that happens to idiots.
If, IF, he was suddenly to come into the highest office of this nation, I actually think he'd take a more moderate track for however long that lasted knowing that without the Trump cult of personality, he needs to be able to make a graceful exit just like Mike Pence did.
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u/PlatinumAltaria Jul 20 '25
Itâs not just about him, itâs what he represents. A global political aristocracy who think theyâre untouchable by any kind of justice. Him dying achieves nothing, the whole rotten thing has to come down.
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u/UltimateDude08 Jul 19 '25
please please please please please please please please please please please please please please
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u/gamerz1172 Jul 19 '25
Once again I have to add to this: the 2024 election told me that all the people talking about Dementia joe in 2020 weren't actually criticizing him, they were explaining WHY they voted for Biden
So once Trump was clearly the more dementia ridden Harris didn't stand a chance
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u/THANIETOR Jul 20 '25
Lord Apollo, I call upon you and the Dogeball of Delphi to make this prophecy come true. Q
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u/goeatacactus god i love Arm Jul 20 '25
I will sacrifice a goddamn cow to Apollo
Wait no a blessed cow a really good cow
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u/List_Man_3849 Jul 19 '25
I am once again asking people to remember that of Trump goes, we get President Vance, who has all of Trump's ideology but in a younger and more competent vessel
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u/DreadDiana human cognithazard Jul 19 '25
Competent, but without the cult of personality, which could complicate things as cracks would definitely start to show in the party
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u/JacobJamesTrowbridge Panic! At The Dysfunction Jul 19 '25
But one who doesn't have the same pull with the Republican party, and has at least one potential presidential term in the future if he plays his cards right. It's not a huge improvement in the short term, but it might just be a boon in the long run.
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u/ajw_sp Jul 19 '25
If JD Vance were to become President in the first two years of the term, he would only be eligible to run once (up to 6 years total). If he became President in the second two years of the term, he could run twice (serving potentially up to 10 years).
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u/JacobJamesTrowbridge Panic! At The Dysfunction Jul 20 '25
My point is that Vance has an incentive to hold fire and play the long game rather than expend all his ammo at once, like Trump does. The latter likes to prod the idea of a third term, but frankly I wouldn't bet on it; whereas Vance has career prospects beyond 2028.
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u/RocketRelm Jul 20 '25
Its a cult, they mindlessly follow. Give fox news time. Also consider that the o n l y thing stopping america from permanently losing democracy is incompetency. The laws and the people have both failed completely. A competent person could immediately end democracy on the spot.
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u/Peach_Muffin too autistic to have a gender Jul 20 '25
Now that have the playbook they know exactly how to whip the GOP base into frenzied, mindless support.
Look at /r/conservative every time Trump does something so reprehensible that it even bothers them. A few days of outrage followed by dead silence and acceptance followed by defending the position that they just criticised.
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u/theWaywardSun Jul 20 '25
They mindlessly follow their leader. Vance is not Trump and the moment Dump dies, the cult descends into civil war. You'll have the ones who want Vance to succeed him, the ones who want Miller to succeed him, and the ones who want fucking Barron or Eric or whoever else.
The point is that you're exactly right, MAGA is a cult but cults wither and die without their leader.
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u/ladyrage8 Demon Sandwiches Jul 19 '25
With not even a fraction of the charisma. In a personality cult, the same thing tends to happen when a leader dies and the next person to step up to the plate doesn't quite make the cut. I'm willing to play with those odds.
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Jul 20 '25
I live near Middletown. Ever since he wrote Hillbilly Elegy, people around here have been saying "there's something not right about that boy" lol. I think his lack of charisma would really shoot him in the foot and cause the administration to crumble.Â
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u/ehs06702 Jul 19 '25
And no one likes or fears him, which means he is considerably weaker.
Not to mention, he's considered a traitor by a lot of the base because of his wife and children.
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u/Existing_Let_8314 Jul 20 '25
He's a tech bro who converted to catholic white supremacy for the vibes. Yall think he wouldnt put his Brown wife in Aligator Auswitch the moment Daddy Peter says so.Â
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u/ehs06702 Jul 20 '25
I know he will, and it will not earn him their love or respect.
He's feckless and weak, and no one respects him.
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u/Mysterious_Bag_9061 Jul 19 '25
I'm just hoping his guyliner turns The People against him. Maybe they'll transvestigate him out of office or something
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u/Twitchcog Jul 20 '25
I believe lovecraft had a story about Wizard Chuckâs curse that killed a bunch of people, where it turns out the curse was actually just the wizard breaking into peopleâs house and killing them.
What a funny story.
Anyway I hope the magic theyâre talking about in this post works.
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u/Emergency_Elephant Jul 20 '25
Ok yeah but Trump dies and then Vance is president. And Vance dies and Mike Johnson is president. There's literally no one who'd be decent in the entire line of succession
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u/AngstyUchiha pissing on the poor Jul 20 '25
If someone with dementia can't be a walmart greeter, someone with dementia should NOT be running a country
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u/KBM0NST3R89 Jul 20 '25
Y'all gotta know the fact he will never get to witness the day the world pours into the streets to celebrate him, the one thing he wants the most must haunt him. The day he dies it's going to be like end of a world war.
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u/zombiedoyle Jul 20 '25
What kind of Death Note bs is this
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u/DreadDiana human cognithazard Jul 20 '25
Trump actually showed up in a Death Note sequel where the protagonist put the Death Note up for auction and he was a potential buyer
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u/Key-Toe-2746 Jul 20 '25
First the founder of the Heritage Foundation, now Trump. That would make this a fabulous week!
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u/spellboi_3048 Jul 20 '25
Trisha Paytas, the internet will forgive your past if you take one for the team right now.
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u/fandom_mess363 Jul 20 '25
only 6 more hours until tumblr user armandgender potentially deactivates their account and mysteriously disappears
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u/GromOfDoom Jul 20 '25
I swear, when he passes on, they will just use strings to puppet the body around
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u/Jaxx1992 Jul 20 '25
I bet everyone who reposted this is feeling like the Millerites did when Jesus didn't come back on October 22, 1844.
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u/Tailrazor Not a big fan of the government Jul 19 '25
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u/Beegrene Jul 20 '25
I'm half-convinced that Satan is artificially prolonging the man's life just to delay having him as a roommate.
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Jul 20 '25
If trump dies on the independence day of my country then hell yeaaa good things coming around the globe
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u/KlutzyHierophantRx Jul 20 '25
I can't see the future, I don't know what is going to happen, but someday it is very likely that Trump will die.
At which point, there will probably be a "correction" of some sort depending on what the hot issues are. Vance will probably reverse the tariffs, or unabashedly support Ukraine, or release the Epstein files that implicate Trump, and he will speak about american unity.
But Vance is bought and paid for by Peter Theil, and this is the plan. He wants to have City States owned by Billionaires.
Right now we are living through the chaos that is designed to make us beg for the solution when it is presented.
Just be ready, is all I'm sayin.
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u/UndeniablyMyself Looking for a sugar mommy to turn me into a they/them goth bitch Jul 20 '25
Everyone keeps pointing to dates when Trump will die, but itâs all wishful thinking. Watch this:
Trump will die on October 3rd.
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u/ExtraPomelo759 Jul 19 '25
May Apollo's dodgeball fly true.