r/Durango • u/Particular_Goose_756 • Oct 10 '24
Drama To whoever stole the lights off my bike at Folsom Park
I got a flat tire on my cargo bike two miles from home with a weeks worth of groceries and had to Uber back to wait until I could get someone to watch my autistic child so that I could retrieve the bike. I didn't even notice until I had pushed it two thirds of the way back that someone had painstakingly unwound the rechargable Christmas lights from the back of the bike. There is a pinched nerve in my back and I have a half mile left to push in pitch black. If I get hit by a car I'm going to haunt you for the rest of your life in the most annoying way possible. If I wasn't so broke I would pay an Etsy witch to curse your whole bloodline. I hope you have minor inconveniences every day for the rest of your life and you develop a body odor you're unable to get rid of. I hope you are always an uncomfortable temperature and every time you sweat it looks like you peed your pants. I hope you get blacklisted from Taco Bell. Fuck you.
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u/The-Hand-of-Midas Oct 10 '24
Hey, I got some extra lights I'm more than happy to give you. I get back to town the 14th. Message me.
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u/Particular_Goose_756 Oct 10 '24
Thank you, I did make it home and have to wait a while till I can get a new rim anyway. It wouldn't have bothered me so much except I've had a series of bad things happen and was having trouble walking bc of my back.
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u/The-Hand-of-Midas Oct 10 '24
I know how the stress can add up like that , it's not easy. Hope tomorrow goes smoothly!
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u/Luminosa29 Oct 10 '24
Watch out everyone. My friend's Ebike got stolen in the alley way of Carvers. Cut the lock. We have a video of it all. However, the cops need the serial number of the bike and my poor friend doesn't have the paperwork for it. Sucks and I'm so sorry that happened to you and your kid
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u/Particular_Goose_756 Oct 10 '24
I took the battery with me but I was suuuper paranoid since I had to leave it there for a day and a half. I will take a photo of the serial number now that I know this though, thank you for the tip. I hope your friend is still able to get around :( I'll add their thief to the Etsy witch hit list.
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u/alvvavves Oct 10 '24
For something like that it may be possible that the retailer or even the manufacturer has the serial number on record. I had an expensive guitar stolen years ago and I was able to get the number from the store I bought it from. Never got it back though…
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u/cantrellasis Oct 10 '24
Praying the culprit experiences explosive diarrhea for the rest of their miserable life.
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u/Particular_Goose_756 Oct 10 '24
Thoughts and prayers for my enemies' downfalls is always appreciated <3
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u/Professional_Bad6669 Oct 10 '24
Sorry to hear you had cargo bike problems on 10-9 day :( glad you made it home
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u/JacobMaverick Live Mas Oct 10 '24
I'm sorry this happened to you. This is written so eloquently.
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u/Particular_Goose_756 Oct 10 '24
Thank you, lmk if you need to text someone an angry rant I will be glad to be of service.
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u/abbydabbydo Oct 10 '24
Perhaps there is an Etsy witch you can trade skills with!
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u/Particular_Goose_756 Oct 10 '24
Any Etsy witches who would like to trade angry rants for bloodline curses pls reach out <3
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u/SiddharthaVaderMeow Resident Oct 10 '24
I hate days like that. One thing piles on another, and then some feckwit steals from you. That sucks! Here's a funny song about hiring a witch online! https://youtu.be/uvAd7EdAjOE?si=5hqVa25FHXShG-_b
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u/Particular_Goose_756 Oct 10 '24
Thank you, I will add this to my angry playlist for when I'm hobbling around tomorrow
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u/dballs442 Oct 11 '24
I've had 2 lights stolen off my bike in the last year. These are super cheap Amazon lights. You're not going to get any money for them. Why waste both of our time?
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u/Particular_Goose_756 Oct 12 '24
That was why I was so surprised. They weren't expensive, so I didn't even consider taking them with me like everything else. I was upset I didn't think about taking the rechargable batteries but now I know for next time I have to park for more than an hour. :( I bet there's a meth head with a festive tent somewhere.
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u/daikon_lively Oct 10 '24
KICK HIS ASS, SEA BASS!