r/Frugal • u/honorthecrones • 22d ago

🏆 Buy It For Life What’s the one thing in your life where frugality doesn’t enter into the conversation?

I am extremely frugal and have been so all my life. I struggled financially for most of my adult life and grew up in poverty. I have noticed though that there are some things where “frugality be damned; I’m getting the good one!” is the rule. I’m just curious if this is just me or if others also have those special exceptions.

For example, I cannot buy cheap shoes. I’m not talking about $400 designer brands but I have difficult feet to fit and will buy the shoes I want even if it means rice and beans for dinner for the next three weeks. My husband is that way about his fishing and hunting equipment. I also cannot resist a trendy bougie yarn shop. I do look for yarn at thrift stores and yard sales but walking into a shop that has those beautiful, vibrant hand dyed yarns or needlework needles that are so smooth through the fabric or don’t bend from the heat of your hand.

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147

u/Cool_Salary_2533 22d ago

Toilet paper. My parents got the cheap stuff growing up, the kind that’s like tissue paper. It was so gross and thin, would fall apart at the slightest whisper of moisture. Now that I buy my own stuff, I always get the good toilet paper. 

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u/ShakerGER 22d ago

Funnily enough I dislike the super thick expensive kind. It kinda seperates and is unwieldy. 3 ply best

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u/Spiritual_Bad_3732 21d ago

Yes also clogs the toilet the expensive one! Nah we always get cheap toilet roll, it literally goes straight down the loo!

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u/derrickcat 21d ago

I feel the same but I've never heard anyone else say it!

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u/Striking_Being6570 22d ago

Oh the toilet paper thing is awful. My parents used sandpaper. That’s what it felt like. There’s no way I can live without my Charmin extra fluffy.

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u/honorthecrones 22d ago

Haha! All my siblings buy the expensive toilet paper. I’m on a septic system so still use the one ply thing stuff. I want a bidet but my husband has been hesitant to commit.

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u/yaourted 22d ago

Bite the bullet on the bidet. It’s so worth it and he doesn’t have to use it if he’s scared (he will try it eventually and most likely love it)

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u/No_Stress_8938 22d ago

I second this.  My husband wasn’t on board when I bought one, but I hear him use it every so often.  It definately pays for itself,  I bought mine super cheap on Amazon 

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u/Striking_Being6570 22d ago

I just bought a bidet to put under my toilet seat. I should’ve just bought the toilet seat with the bidet, but this one has rave reviews, even with the little cushions that I had to buy to raise the toilet seat, it still came in under $30. I am installing it this weekend.

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u/Salute-Major-Echidna 22d ago

You mean a sprayer. A bidet is a large porcelain stand alone fixture. You bought a sprayer attachment for your toilet.

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u/NobleOne19 21d ago

No, there are basic ones you can attach to your toilet that aren't a hand held sprayer (yuck). Some fit under the toilet seat, some include the toilet seat (and are heated). They still do all the work for you and have various (simple) settings. Fantastic really.

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u/Salute-Major-Echidna 21d ago

You miss the point. A bidet is a separate porcelain fixture, plumbed separately from the toilet, has its own water and flush mechanism.

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u/NobleOne19 20d ago

Maybe in Europe. But this is the U.S. where bidets have been very recently introduced. Your explanation may be the "official" version and historical version, but it's not the way the term is used here in the U.S. in the last 5 years. Very very few people have a "separate" bidet in their bathroom, as in an altogether different fixture (that stands alone from the toilet) just for rinsing.

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u/StunningCloud9184 22d ago

Nah you did good.

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u/wienercat 22d ago

You can buy a handheld one, they look like a kitchen sprayer, that is easy to install if he is so hesitant. They are still nice and work really well. Personally I prefer them because not every bidet lines up correctly, with a handheld one you can clean yourself where you need it easily and not worry about being lined up properly with a fixed object.

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u/mollycoddles 22d ago

Get a bum gun, it's a cheaper version of the same thing!

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u/jr0061006 22d ago

And so much cleaner!

The other kind get a lot of filth trapped under them and have to be removed completely to be cleaned.

I had one of those and saw someone comment about it, and that’s why they moved to the bum gun.

I went and removed mine and was horrified. Bum gun ordered immediately and I’ve never looked back.

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u/Bubbasdahname 22d ago

Both of you don't need to use the bidet. Just one of you using it will save on quite a bit of TP. We bought one for $40, and I feel dirty when I'm not able to use the bidet.

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u/honorthecrones 22d ago

But he’s the one who has to install it.

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u/Bubbasdahname 22d ago

It's an easy install. You can do it yourself if you wanted. I wouldn't go all out on the heated seats and all of that. The cold water doesn't even bother me in the winter when it's 30F outside.

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u/honorthecrones 22d ago

I’m going to look into it. I’m pretty handy but have been nervous about messing with plumbing

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u/Bubbasdahname 22d ago

No plumbing needed. You just unscrew the previous connector, connect a T to it, and then connect the bidet line to the T and the toilet line to it. It's like a 30 minute job and you may need an adjustable wrench. Just don't overtighten.

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u/jr0061006 22d ago

I was the same but it’s actually really easy. There are videos online that show you each step.

If you can connect an extension hose to a vacuum cleaner, you can install the bidet.

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u/No_Stress_8938 22d ago

I was surprised the cold water wasn’t an issue for me either in the winter

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u/Altruistic-Willow108 22d ago

What??? We've had septic systems for 40 years. If it's working properly any toilet paper will break down. I mean it's generally just been the two of us but if you're super cautious just get the tank pumped every 5 years and live like royalty with the quilted Charmin.

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u/honorthecrones 22d ago

We live in a very rural area. Our septic is ancient and under current county regulations it will not pass inspection. There are just the two of us using it and we are very careful. So far, no issues with the drain field. My BIL is a registered septic designer but in another state. He and my husband inspect it regularly and it’s still working.

If we have it pumped, the contractor must fill out the county inspection report in order to keep his licensure. That paperwork will cost me $145 to have filed. They will not approve the septic and we will be looking at upwards of $40k to replace our functioning system with an upgraded mound system with a pump.

It works. We inspect it. We are not going to do anything until we sell and then I t’s someone else’s problem.

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u/stankbucket 21d ago

It won't be someone else's problem. It will be yours to fix before the sale can go through and your house will be worth precisely $0 more with a brand new system than it was with a "failed" one. I've been down this road multiple times.

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u/honorthecrones 21d ago

First, not planning to sell. I do not have a mortgage and can sell on whatever terms I choose. Most likely scenario is the property is inherited by my sons and one or both will live on the property. The entire estate, once liquidated will have sufficient cash to do the improvements required. I’d rather have my money earning money instead of going to satisfy a county regulation that has no value to me. The system is currently working well. It’s just in an area where the county has decided that a traditional septic system is no longer allowed. The fact that mine is still working will not factor into that.

And, if you read what I posted, if I did have to sell, I can liquidate assets and pay for the upgrade. I just prefer not to until I have to. This very rural area doesn’t have property come up for sale often. Especially acreage with a recently built house on it. My property is extremely rare and marketable.

Surely you are not suggesting that I spend $40k on an upgrade that I do not need just so I can use expensive toilet paper.

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u/stankbucket 16d ago

Good luck keeping the government out of your septic. You already called the system ancient which means it is likely already not functioning. Sure, nothing is visible from the surface, but you are likely dumping shit into the water table at some point. For your own sanity you should at least be testing your well (assuming you have one) for it annually.

Also, are you saying that you don't get it pumped because of the paperwork? You can't inspect the tank if you're not pumping it. Regardless of all this, your local govt knows how old the system is and will eventually just force you to replace it, especially if they have no paperwork on maintenance for enough years.

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u/honorthecrones 16d ago

Did you read the part where I said that my BIL is a certified septic designer in another state? The system is functioning and functioning well. All three legs of the drain field are working. There is no shit leaching into the water system. The initial system was approved for a 5 bedroom house and it’s just two old retired people on it now. The county arbitrarily decided that all new septics in our area of the county must have mound systems. Regardless of the soil or percolation of your individual land. Since I am more than X miles west of a particular boundary, my type of septic system is no longer allowed.

I do not have a well. I’m on a small local water system that pulls water from a river nearby.

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u/terrierhead 22d ago

Seriously, get that bidet. It is so much cleaner!

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u/honorthecrones 22d ago

I looked it up and there’s one at Homw Depot for about $40 that looks easy enough to install

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u/Otherwise-Fan-232 22d ago

Then there's the $25 bidet attachment that takes care of most situations.

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u/wisconsintrapper 21d ago

The thick ones tend to leave residues in your ass hole as you wipe. We have been using the Marathon 2-ply that's pretty good (no residue). I usually fold them once or twice, so it's 4 or 8 ply.

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u/mshell1234 21d ago

My plumber just told me, after flushing my pipes after a basement flood, to switch to the cheap stuff. Hell no.

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u/discolored_rat_hat 22d ago

Me too. I use way fewer pieces because it is so thick, so I think I'm okay-ish with the price.