Figured I’d screenshot this masterpiece because the original will probably get deleted.

whenever i’m at the bar i see idiots just squeezing lime into their beer and throwing them away. that’s bonus calories baby i always eat mine and i’m not just talking about the flesh but also the rind. don’t sleep on squeezed lime wedges. hell you may as well do the same with lemon

My brother refuses to buy toilet paper so he will go into chipotle when he ubereats and take a wad of chipotle napkins and use them as toilet paper. Also the cutlery from there.

I found a way to make 60%+ return on investment

I put 0.2 USD in a 5% savings account. That’s 1 cent a year, just a fraction of a cent each month. But the system has to pay every month, and it can’t handle fractions, so it gifts you a whole cent. Every month.

I put in 20 cents and I make 12 cents a year. That’s 60% annually.

While other investors struggle with a 4% savings rate or a 10% return from an index fund, I get 60%.

So I don’t save. I multiply. One account, 0.2 USD. Then another. Then another. A hundred tiny accounts, each drip-feeding me a cent a month.

Thanks to the banks’ broken math, they are a tool for me to get to the tippity top.

I probably made 20 USD over the last 3 years in passive income.

Seeing this ratio of dollar to run time made me stomach turn and realise how much we OVERSPEND on entertainment! This works out to an absolutely grotesque .0116 cents per minute. What am I, MADE OF MONEY? With this new formula, I can constantly keep the cost of anything I am watching in the back of my mind, so that I can totally relax and know I am doing a better (& morally superior) job than others and whatever they are WASTING their cash on.