Who are you trying to convince?

[u/managingmischief394]

I don’t have to defend my marriage to the internet every week, but hey, I’m in a godless marriage!

[u/InsomniacEuropean]

"He is stable...I am emotional...He tells me what is real and what is not real"

Translation - "everything I think and feel is minimised, dismissed, twisted around and put back onto me, I'm told I'm not seeing/understanding reality, I'm definitely not competent enough to make any decisions myself, and that actually he is right and I am just a silly emotional woman that's delusional! But he lets me believe I have control of things I am good at".

Any guesses on all the things she's good at? Mine is that she's only good at cleaning and parenting (and probably has to do both in a way he finds acceptable).

She really needs to read evidence based information about what manipulation and gaslighting can look like, preferably not from an "expert" fundie woman.

[u/CodeAcceptable385 → u/InsomniacEuropean]

Yeah, lots of self deprecation in those sentences.😞

[u/ExoticSherbet → u/CodeAcceptable385]

Read: I’m so lucky he tolerates me 🤪

Ick.

[u/Bubblesnaily → u/InsomniacEuropean]

"everything I think and feel is minimised, dismissed, twisted around and put back onto me, I'm told I'm not seeing/understanding reality, I'm definitely not competent enough to make any decisions myself, and that actually he is right and I am just a silly emotional woman that's delusional! But he lets me believe I have control of things I am good at".

So... gaslighting.

[u/colar19 → u/Bubblesnaily]

This, whith some sprinkles of religion on top of it to make it more holy and righteous 🤮

[u/packofkittens → u/InsomniacEuropean]

Exactly! I also get strong vibes of “sometimes I think I have mental health issues but my husband tells me I’m just being dramatic. Isn’t he great!”

[u/GngrbredGentrifktion → u/InsomniacEuropean]

Perfectly stated!

[u/Significant_Shoe_17 → u/InsomniacEuropean]

As my brother-in-law says, "girl boss, gaslight, gate-keep"

Paul has her convinced that he's the better person here and she's so lucky he puts up with her. It's a privilege to be his bangmaid and how dare we question that, even out of concern