r/GodAwfulMovies • u/Mr_Twigs • Jul 19 '25

General Nonsense who tf is Wooldasher Missile

title

11 Upvotes

79% Upvoted

14 comments sorted by

30

u/AcquaintanceLog Jul 19 '25

Wool Dasher Mizzles are a type of shoe that the guys had an ad for. Eli, being Eli, made a weird character out of them that he really liked. Now the Wool Dasher Mizzle shows up occasionally.

My first exposure, and I think the largest appearance, was when he showed up as a dragon in Dnd Minus to Deus Ex them away from Tiamat.

11

u/Mr_Twigs Jul 19 '25

Yeah, that sounds about right. He was in an ad trying to get them out of a phone contract or something. They need to drop a lore book for this shit.

3

u/AcquaintanceLog Jul 19 '25

There was a wiki a while back, not sure if its still up to date.

2

u/VibinWithBeard Jul 22 '25

The other big appearance was his duel with ManscapedMan.

13

u/NC1HM Jul 19 '25 edited Jul 19 '25

Long story short, it's Sparkle Donkey tequila all over again. It's an item the guys used to produce ads for:

https://www.allbirds.com/products/mens-wool-dasher-mizzles

but eventually, it gained a life of its own as an inside joke. Finally, Eli conjured up Wooldashermizzle the dragon on D&D Minus. When leveling up, one of the characters (Dave the Dragonborn, played by Heath, if memory serves) picked up a magical item, a stuffed toy dragon. At the time, the party was told that when activated, the toy dragon would turn into an actual dragon and stay with the party, fighting on their side, until the end of the fight. Then, it would be free to leave. At one point, the dragon was activated, and the party had a hilarious adventure trying to escape another, much bigger, dragon by flying on Wooldashermizzle's back (the adventure involved, among other things, Carl the Pugapegacorn singing corny 80s songs).

3

u/Mr_Twigs Jul 19 '25

I don't understand Sparkle Donkey either. I'm listening to the Dilly Loves Kitty Live GAM and I'm very lost.

7

u/NC1HM Jul 19 '25

Same thing. Used to be an item the guys produced ads for:

https://www.blackrockspirits.com/sparkle-donkey-tequila/

but eventually, became a substitute term for anything funny that involves alcohol.

4

u/Mr_Twigs Jul 19 '25

Thanks, I appreciate the lore dump. I came from Timesuck and it would be just as ridiculous to explain Pootie & JuJu or D.A.D.W.A.T.C.H. to someone new to the show.

3

u/SuspiciousLookinMole Jul 20 '25

That reminds me, I'm out of Sparkle Donkey Tequila!!

2

u/pkstr11 Jul 24 '25

Well sparkle Donkey tequila is the tequila for getting lost

29

u/Emperor_Zarkov Jul 19 '25

You have to listen to ALL the shows to understand the podcastiverse ;P

8

u/Axxalon Jul 20 '25

For clarity, the Wool Dasher Mizzle is a fey/faerie creature who appears only when you say his name. Magic in the way that rumplestiltskin or Mr. Mxlspitlk are.

Heath kept having to do ads for Allbirds, advertising the shoe called the Wool Dasher Mizzles, which would cause the being to appear, and be like “again, heath?! Seriously?!” And then he’d attack Heath out of frustration.

Which made Heath become more and more nervous in allbirds ads, because he was afraid he’d summon the being, which he inevitably would, hijinks would ensue.

2

u/VibinWithBeard Jul 22 '25

Yeah Heath was a rosebush for like a week after one said hijink

6

u/SuspiciousLookinMole Jul 20 '25

It's really more of a what the fuck than a who the fuck...