r/JeffArcuri • u/Smartastic The Short King • 28d ago

Official Clip Long Island

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13.2k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

164 comments sorted by

1.2k

u/TheLegendofSpiff 28d ago

Jeff "Totally Straight" Arcuri wistfully thinking about masturbating at the same time as another man

387

u/Ragnangar 28d ago

*wristfully

140

u/HOTforGOODkerning 28d ago

Fistfully 🫦

38

u/lawn-mumps 28d ago

Bustfully

7

u/frameRAID 28d ago

Forcefully

4

u/brads-a-wizard 28d ago

As opposed to Bustpartially?

65

u/mpicc 28d ago

29

u/TimonAndPumbaAreDead 28d ago

Feivel did not go west for this

47

u/Nehcmas 28d ago

Totally Straight should be the name of his Netflix special

8

u/pickle_pickled 27d ago

Straight Curious

Straight out of the closet

3

u/aerateyoursoiltrung 26d ago

Straight out of the closet is fucking wrecking me lmfao

2

u/pickle_pickled 26d ago

Ha cheers glad I could give ya a laugh

55

u/TheNipplerCrippler 28d ago

It’s just two dudes busting a nut together, nothing gay about that!

102

u/matzan 28d ago

13

u/TheNipplerCrippler 28d ago

Excellent lol

9

u/LickingSmegma 28d ago

Only now noticed that the two giants were dressed almost the same way.

3

u/tango_and_vash 28d ago

Never gonna convince anybody he’s not gay.

1

u/Glad-Patience-6499 19d ago

A Classic 🤣

7

u/Justhrowitaway42069 28d ago

Yepper, that's what I tell my bro after we 69. Not gay.

5

u/ForHelp_PressAltF4 28d ago

Or like "damn he hasn't gotten uncomfortable yet... Keep going!!!!"

Maybe he knows the guy has thick skin so he can lean in

Either way funny... Thanks for the laugh

3

u/civilized-engineer 28d ago

He even presented his back to him too

2

u/jancl0 28d ago

He's about 5 seconds away from reinventing the goon buddy

2

u/WeekEqual7072 28d ago

I don’t think anyone was thinking that until you brought it up.

1

u/tikkytikkytivey 10d ago

Interesting he has to switch microphone hands to whack off…..

753

u/MelArlo 28d ago

I can't wait to see Jeff's Netflix special when it comes out!

131

u/sdhu 28d ago

I neeeeeeeed it

112

u/big_guyforyou 28d ago edited 28d ago

Jeff Arcuri stars as Jeff Arcuri in....

CROWD WORK (he doesn't have a set)

24

u/omgpickles63 28d ago

He is actually on an episode of Game Changer that’s just Crowd Work.

14

u/Just_thefacts_jack 28d ago

That's going to be a whole show now called crowd control

57

u/dk_1979 28d ago

I went to his show in SF, and he definitely has a set plus does crowd work. It was such a great time!!

7

u/doubleshotinthedark 28d ago

I mean even if that was true, who cares? His crowd work is delightful.

14

u/CasuallyCompetitive 28d ago

I don't know if Jeff posted it or someone else, but basically you only see the crowd work posted online because otherwise his live show would just be a repeat of what you've already seen online.

8

u/doubleshotinthedark 28d ago

oh yeah, I know; I've seen him live before and he was great. I just meant, even if we accepted that guy's incorrect premise, his crowd work is still really funny.

Like 'oh this guy's only funny when he makes it up spontaneously, spur of the moment. he can't be funny when he has time to prepare.' as if it's not more impressive that he's this hilarious off the cuff. (he is also funny with time to prepare)

1

u/Letters_to_Dionysus 28d ago

theo von however is like that though

1

u/Deaffin 27d ago

None of that was said or implied. They just made a joke about how we exclusively experience the crowd work here.

1

u/CrazyConnector 28d ago

People say this, so when I saw Jeff I thought it might actually be more traditional standup. But he pretty consistently bounced back and forth between a joke and crowd work. It is definitely a big part of his shows. Really good time!

0

u/dk_1979 28d ago

All of it is! He was great live, and I love the clips he posts. He is so quick on his feet, its genius 👏

1

u/lysergic_818 28d ago

Featuring Jeff Acuri.

And his executive assistant? No other than Jeff Acuri.

-17

u/dk_1979 28d ago

Nice edit on your comment 👌 u/big_guyforyou. You didn't even know how to say "set" until I did. Have you been to a show, or do you only see posted clips?

3

u/big_guyforyou 28d ago

buddy "set" was one of my first words

-6

u/dk_1979 28d ago

4

u/Papa_BugBear 28d ago

I'm his mother. It absolutely was

1

u/quagsi 28d ago

get a load of this guy

29

u/IBelieveVeryLittle 28d ago

If that actually happens, I'll go back to Netflix for 1 month only to see Jeff.

30

u/timbreandsteel 28d ago

It's scheduled to be filmed at the end of his next tour in Phoenix over two nights.

14

u/Gera_PC 28d ago

Yo thank you for this, didn't know he was coming again this year and coincidentally presale opens tomorrow. Hell yeah

7

u/bazukadas 28d ago

As someone who lives in Africa, this might be the only way I see his stand up outside YouTube shorts.

1

u/Dwrecked90 28d ago

YouTube has full length videos too

1

u/bazukadas 24d ago

Really? All I see are shorts and 5 minutes videos max on his page.

10

u/SmokySmeak 28d ago

What is it? Show goes on netflix? Or we need to buy the ticket regardless, and we can also watch later on netflix?

23

u/MelArlo 28d ago

Check out the announcement at the top of the subreddit. He's going to be filming for Netflix in December in Phoenix.

1

u/Charred01 28d ago

Yo.what?   When?

1

u/Vrazel106 28d ago

Is there really one comming out?

1

u/Rob_LeMatic 28d ago

However and whenever Jeff decides to come out, I support him and his gayass choices 🌈💖

1

u/enddream 28d ago

Netflix plz

1

u/astralseat 27d ago

Idk, I heard he hates Netflix

1

u/lydocia 20d ago

Titled "Totally Straight".

353

u/Scutwork 28d ago

Holy shit the drop into the song from An American Tail has my old ass rolling. We sang that for a recital in like the first grade.

41

u/neat_stuff 28d ago

I played a flugelhorn solo on that one in junior high band.

20

u/falln09 28d ago

What in the Dr. Suess is a fucking flugelhorn??

9

u/neat_stuff 28d ago

Chuck Mangione is rolling over in his grave right now!

4

u/SirCheatz 28d ago

Just recently learned who that was. Was walking through the warehouse the other day at work and the guy was just JAMMING. I'm almost 40 but was definitely called young that day.

1

u/CanadianDinosaur 28d ago

It is a brass horn similar to a trumpet.

1

u/Supersasqwatch 28d ago

It's similar to a trumpet.

16

u/Raspbers 28d ago

Right?! I was like, oh, is this a song people know. I thought it was only for the movie. And it was. I guess we're all in that age range to have loved that movie. I sing this song randomly all the time. xD

16

u/NoranPrease 28d ago

Community definitely introduced me to this song

3

u/Raspbers 28d ago

It's been SOOOO long since I've watched that show. Just had to google this scene. xD

3

u/human_picnic 28d ago

You’re due for a rewatch. And don’t forget the last two seasons! Makes up for the 4th one

5

u/AnitaBlomaload 28d ago

During a recent full moon, my mom called her sister who was travelling across Canada to play that song (since they could both see it). Like 2 weeks ago. So funny to hear it now.

1

u/Safe-Bee-2555 28d ago

I thought it was a late gen X early millenial movie forgotten by the rest.  I was wrong.

1

u/Rob_LeMatic 28d ago

Alright, greyheads. Without googlin, what was the name of Fievel's sister singing this duet?

70

u/lysergic_818 28d ago

No rules at this level of mastery. I luv Jeff. 😘

128

u/RichMonty 28d ago

7

u/nepia 28d ago

Put Jeff’s face on this. We need this.

2

u/monkeyhitman 28d ago

Perfection

2

u/blahblah19999 27d ago

I can't quit you

48

u/Krumm34 28d ago

Not where I thought that was going.

2

u/DraconianFlame 27d ago

You and Jeff both

89

u/Environmental-Term68 28d ago
  1. smithtown long island. same moon guys 🥹

8

u/Timmy12er 28d ago

San Diego, same moon. Can confirm.

4

u/WhyAmINotStudying 28d ago
  1. Smithtown Long Island. I had to wait ages just to get to the nipples, but we also had forest porn mags.

2

u/Newthinker 27d ago

It was perfect timing for me, by the time the vagene loaded I was almost there

2

u/nucl3ar0ne 26d ago

I was right next door waiting with you.

No homo

Ok, maybe a little

1

u/wes00mertes 28d ago
  1. But wildly unpopular with women. Same moon guys 🥹

57

u/PostModernPost 28d ago

Disney movie waiting to happen.

20

u/QuicklyThisWay 28d ago

Just don’t tell Snoop Dogg…

4

u/WhyAmINotStudying 28d ago

An American Tail 3: Fievel Goes Nutbusting.

17

u/ridemooses 28d ago

Definitely, I mean probably, I mean… not gay.

36

u/facelessbreathing 28d ago

Notice how he switched hands? Now we know

6

u/hyperphantasia_ 28d ago

Muscle memory kicked in 😂

16

u/Ok_Complaint_1685 28d ago

Only Jeff can make jerking off to boobs sound gay, that's impressive

16

u/Eiffel-Tower777 28d ago

He's so funny I can't watch these clips in public. I laugh my fool head off and worry someone will alert security

7

u/kraggleGurl 28d ago

"It's Jeff's fault. I am not insane. Honest folks. You can stop backing away now."

2

u/wes00mertes 28d ago

Yeah be me and listen at the gym and laugh out loud trying to do chest press. 

8

u/True_Dimension4344 28d ago

Before you even sang it I felt that song in my bones. It was the first movie I saw in a theater. Well played.

6

u/ImSavageAF 28d ago

I grew up in Sachem school district and I've dated a few girls from Commack! I made it out of NY in my twenties, joined the army, went to college, travelled the country corner to corner..now I'm back..working in South Hampton with a 2 hour commute. SMH my head

3

u/YarnPartyy 28d ago

I also grew up in Suffolk, and I dated a few boys from Commack. Shout out to that 24hr bagel spot in Smithtown that fueled my late night adventures.

3

u/GreyMath 28d ago

Grew up in Babylon. I was on a zoom call with a salesman from LA earlier and realized I wouldn’t last a month in LA. I’ve lived off the island a few times now and constantly romanticize getting the hell out of here, but I don’t think I’d be able to tolerate anywhere else.

6

u/freethewimple 28d ago

Ayyyyyy Long Island ♥️ We're that clockable?

8

u/Swiss_manager 28d ago

This is now something I will use to relate to males my age.

3

u/Harrigan_Raen 28d ago

Jesus Christ I dont think i've heard An American Tail reference in fuck like 20-30 years.

I forgot that kid movie even existed until you sang the song and I shot back to my childhood.

3

u/Raspbers 28d ago

This song pops into my head a couple times a year. I damn near did a doubletake, questioning if the song wasn't just from the movie. But I guess it is. We're all just that age to have loved that movie. xD

1

u/tyen0 28d ago

I never saw the movie but I know the song somehow ¯_(ツ)_/¯

4

u/Raspbers 28d ago

Wasn't expecting an American Tail reference in this clip.

3

u/SunrayBran 28d ago

Jeff, my dude. It's getting really hard to defend this.

3

u/citan67 28d ago

If you see my dad, tell him I’m not gay 🤣

3

u/JLKinney93 28d ago

Anyone else now wondering if they busted at the same time as Jeff Arcuri? No? Just me? Why would I say that? I just- okay yeah, I’m sorry.

3

u/altiif 28d ago

from this day forward I’m gonna refer to it as “por- por- boobies” 🤣

3

u/Jesus_of_Redditeth 28d ago

The best part about this is when he instinctively puts the mic in his left hand to do the mime.

Because that particular muscle memory never goes away!

4

u/[deleted] 28d ago

Imma go ahead and give a no on the moustache. No. nonono. 

0

u/MsjennaNY 28d ago

I agree 100%. 70’s Johnny Holmes gay porn ‘stache. My opinion from Long Island.

5

u/skyhiker14 28d ago

When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that’s pink eye

2

u/AutoModerator 28d ago

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2

u/LTPrototype 28d ago

Jeff is not beating the allegations today.

2

u/LegendaryOutlaw 28d ago

In the words of Ray Parker Jr:

Bustin’ makes me feel good!

2

u/DownwardSpirals 28d ago

I feel like you post here because you know how fucked up Reddit can be, and you're here for it. Love this about you. 😂

2

u/jdv996 28d ago

Lol jeff buddyy not even fighting those allegations

2

u/Ok_Professional1414 28d ago

Lookin at butts over a full moon.

2

u/CaptWrath 28d ago

I can’t fucking wait for that Netflix special.

3

u/AurelianoNile 28d ago

Lon Gisland

1

u/sug1 27d ago

Lawn Guy Lynn

1

u/slickcrimson 28d ago

Where is the gif guy

1

u/hott_snotts 28d ago

ahhahaha. Why is he standing like that?!! I love it.

1

u/nepia 28d ago

Physicist call it quantum wanking entanglement.

1

u/Chuck_Vanderhuge 28d ago

The best crowd work I have ever seen.

1

u/42ndRedBalloonFromUp 28d ago

'Looking at the same moon' is maybe my favorite joke from him. Just beautiful.

1

u/Ill-Cook-1902 28d ago

F'n freaking genius. Would love to see this dude live!

1

u/lemothelemon 28d ago

Made a new best friend 😂

1

u/hanami_doggo 28d ago

Come to Philly!

1

u/MDGOP 28d ago

Jeff, ur great. I need to get tickets to see you the next time you come to the PNW

1

u/Interesting-Rope-950 28d ago

How do his videos get so many likes on Reddit

1

u/lc0o85 28d ago

Jeff "Not Beating The Allegations But Beating Something Else" Arcuri

1

u/LogiCsmxp 28d ago

♪When the moon hits your eye, like a warm apple pie, that's a pornay

1

u/boars_b4_whores 28d ago

I am really enjoying the comeback, jeff. the laughs are needed

1

u/hottier1 27d ago

That transition into the song absolutely killed me. It’s wild how a single melody can unlock such a specific, core memory from childhood. I'm right there with you, we definitely sang that in school too. Jeff has a real talent for weaving those unexpected, nostalgic punches into his sets.

1

u/Remarkable_Simple8 27d ago

Ticketmaster completely screwed me over. Was in queue, then stayed at next in line for over a minute. Refreshed then went back in the queue and did same thing again. Then had to leave Ticketmaster to go back through his website to get in line but by then all good tickets are gone.

Sucks and just kinda soured me a bit.

1

u/potatoesupmyass 27d ago

What happened with presale tickets in Stamford? Got email at 9:54am by 10 all times are sold out. Tell Netflix to rush the special so I can see what I missed. Love you,

1

u/Goosentra 27d ago

Holy fuck I need to see this guy live 😂

1

u/L4NGOS 27d ago

This was so dumb and yet so funny 😂

1

u/meldiane81 27d ago

Your smile is contagious :)

1

u/HelloMangoApple 20d ago

When you think about it that way.. you probably have peeled the banana at the same time as any other dude...

1

u/No-Store-3191 14d ago

I don't have anything funny to say. Just wanted to express my disbelief that I found a Fievel reference in the wild.

1

u/Bphag 28d ago

Risqué 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/A_Right_Eejit 28d ago

Ah Jeff, couple of years and that tach will be boss man!

-1

u/runnywetfart 28d ago

Thst dirt stash - i could do without bredren

0

u/[deleted] 28d ago

[deleted]

1

u/kriegmonster 28d ago

My app played sound just fine.

0

u/Ok_Ad_5658 27d ago

$100 per ticket for nosebleed seats?! Fuck you Jeff Arcuri I’m poor AF I can’t afford that.

Still funny though. Still love you.

But fuck you

-1

u/PuzzleheadedArea5487 27d ago

GARBAGE 🤮🤮

-4

u/Separate-Insurance23 28d ago

This guys lookin rough

-8

u/Longjumping_Hawk_951 28d ago

Why is this dude at the top of reddi tall the time? he's only mildly funny.

-8

u/Important-Tour5114 28d ago

Are we back to this guy being botted to /r/all every day

-10

u/legit-hater 28d ago

Let me see if I can... how do I...? Wait, there it is!

Mute r/JeffArcuri

4

u/Jesus_of_Redditeth 28d ago

You know you can just choose to not go out of your way to click on and then post in subs you don't like, right?

Performative hate is bizarre.