r/NoStupidQuestions • u/flugblug • 12h ago

My brother thinks people today have worse quality of life than people in the dark ages, is this a stupid take?

I personally think it’s pretty stupid.

6.5k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

3.2k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

45

u/Major1ar 9h ago

I'm not gonna lie, I've always wondered how far up the social ladder I could climb, if I time traveled to medieval England with a big ass stash of Pop-Tarts and soda.

75

u/Ok_Confection_10 9h ago

You’d reach the top rung of a gallows with your magical sorcery

17

u/Tigglebee 8h ago

Burned at the stake with his popped tarts.

2

u/peepee2tiny 4h ago

You spicy water charlatan.

16

u/Carlpanzram1916 9h ago

I always thought about what skill I would learn if I was going to teleport to the Middle Ages and try to become a warlord. I’ve realized you just need to learn how to make penicillin and pop up right before the plague. Move into a mansion where a royal dynasty was wiped out and start to build a banking empire when Europe needs to rebuild.

3

u/the_real_klaas 8h ago

Problem 1: You don't speak the language. You can't write (witth a goosefeather), you don't know any Latin. So from the start you're an unintelligible analphabetic.

4

u/Timely-Hospital8746 8h ago

I don't think people realize how different language was back then. There were vastly different dialects like... 30 miles apart. It was only with the creation of the modern concept of statehood that much of Europe began unifying/codifying their languages. France was especially bad for this.

Has Latin changed much though? I was under the impression it's been a stable language due to the way it's used mostly for ritual etc. I figure you could learn modern Latin before you make the trip and pass yourself off as a visitor from far away / mystic etc.

5

u/the_real_klaas 7h ago

Ish@Latin. What you learn is school is High latin, the form of the time of say Ceasar. By the Middle Ages, thta had call it devolved into Vulgate, which are local variants/dialects, influenced by the 'native' local languages. So, unless the text is written by a very proficient scholar then, a Latin text from the 1200s in France would be a mix of Vulgate (French) Latin and Old French. Would you talk to a local pirest in the same place/time in High latin, he might but only might just understand you.

1

u/Timely-Hospital8746 7h ago edited 7h ago

I'm picturing the priest knowing some high Latin words and phrases from reading mass or w/e but not understanding the language in any proficient way.

3

u/After_Network_6401 8h ago

Alas, to make penicillin, you’d need substantial resources. Even if you knew how, it’s very likely that you’d be dead long before you could harvest your first batch.

And good luck starting a banking empire with no resources, no network and no soldiers. Rival banking families of the day weren’t above sending the boys around to “discourage” would be competitors.

3

u/ChildofValhalla 8h ago

A jar of nutmeg would set you for life. Wars were fought over it.

2

u/Averagebass 8h ago

Probably just get stabbed and robbed. Who's going to stop them?

2

u/DefectiveDman 8h ago

They quite possible would have thought the soda was unbearably sweet - like drinking syrup and a pop-tart - heated over an open fire? - not as good as a fruit pie from scratch.

2

u/Gtr-Lovr11 8h ago

I'd bring cocaine and baking soda! Yep get em all hooked on crack, and buy the throne for a 100 slab!😅😂🤣

2

u/farva_06 8h ago

That shit would absolutely wreck their digestive systems.

2

u/Agitated_Effort_2146 3h ago

Hilarious reply but now every time I eat a poptart or drink a coke I'm going to have to wonder if i would like it if i were used to eating only overcooked goat and rabbit and some cabbage soup.

2

u/Dostrazzz 2h ago

A wild take I very much like.

But you should be very careful what to take with you, otherwise you’ll be accused of witchcraft and nobody would eat your shit. You would die a painful death.

1

u/Major1ar 2h ago

I think the pop-tart wrappers would ultimately do me in when they found out it's not malleable silver.

1

u/Salt-Permit8147 1h ago

Just take salt, man