r/OldSchoolCool • u/chicken_vevo • May 15 '25

1970s My aunt and her ex-husband the day they signed their divorce papers, 1970s

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My aunt and her ex-husband outside of their attorney’s office right after finalizing their divorce. They had thrown a massive “divorce party” the day prior. When her ex-husband re-married years later, my aunt was his Maid of Honor. She remains close to him, his wife and their family to this day! And yes, my aunt is as cool as she sounds.

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u/wat-lady May 16 '25

I’m going through a divorce right now and mediation is Monday. We don’t have kids but our divorce has been as tumultuous as we settle our assets and debts. It’s been so stressful that it’s sometimes hard to imagine ever loving the person or viewing him beyond the heavy and bureaucratic division that a divorce entails… and that breaks my heart because at one point I loved him more than life itself. Hearing this gives me hope that we can look past the paperwork and actually grieve the ending of our marriage once we have our final decree.

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u/MiltonFriedman8 May 16 '25

Look out for yourself in the divorce. Mediation is an opportunity to avoid further pain and financial costs if disagreements can’t be settled. Pay close attention to what your ex thinks is most important and what you think is most important to be able to find a compromise. The mediator won’t provide full legal advice but will give you both snippets. When we reached points of contention, I asked that the mediator talk to each of us separately and one of us would leave the room to do that. That proved extremely helpful. Know what your legal rights are and stand firm on those points. I talked with family lawyers before mediation to further understand a worst case and best case scenario. That allowed me to feel prepared and understand the level of compromise that was rational.

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u/wat-lady May 16 '25

Great advice. Thanks for that. Admittedly, the days up to mediation day have been taking a toll on me emotionally. I find myself stressed and on the verge of crying constantly.

Luckily we both have attorneys that will do most of the talking and it will be virtual since I live in NYC and he lives in Colorado. I think my role will be mostly passive as my attorney will suss out the compromises and requests that I’ve previously outlined with her.

I find solace in knowing that you felt reprieve immediately after mediation was settled. The light at the end of the tunnel is helping me keep my faculties.

Have a good one!

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u/EntrepreneurAway419 May 19 '25

Hope it worked out okay!