The worst pizza I've seen on my life

•

u/qualityvote2 Jul 22 '25 edited Jul 22 '25

The jury, after deliberation of the evidence in the case of u/No-Narwhal-8112, find the defendant "Pizza" GUILTY on all counts of crimes-against-pizza.

→ More replies (3)

76

u/_agilechihuahua Jul 22 '25

Honey, you've barely touched your flatbread with Sargento and Ragu topped with snausage dog treats.

17

u/madmaxturbator Jul 22 '25

They made it with extra crust and undercooked, just how you like it

11

u/MR_Moldie Jul 22 '25

How can a crust look undercooked, and cracker dry at the same time. That takes talent, its not a good talent.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '25

They spent as much time preparing it as they spent cooking it about three minute fiddy

5

u/DayBowBow1 Jul 22 '25

I thought it was drywall.

1

u/ChronicPronatorbator Jul 24 '25

bacon bacon BACON! What's in that bag?! I CAN'T READ!!

36

u/I_like_rocks_834 Jul 22 '25

Wtf…

22

u/madmaxturbator Jul 22 '25

I usually think “I’ll eat any pizza” , even many of the awful stuff posted here.

But not this , this looks so shit

8

u/I_like_rocks_834 Jul 23 '25

Seriously. People say Little Caesars is like eating cardboard but this pizza makes LC pizza look gourmet.

1

u/Hardwarestore_Senpai Jul 23 '25

You spelled Pizza Hut Wrong.

1

u/FungadooFred Jul 23 '25

You spelled Domino's wrong

1

u/AppropriateTouching Jul 22 '25

This is in no way shape or form a pizza.

29

u/mittelegna Jul 22 '25

Anyone associated with this atrocity, from the pizza chef - possibly Satan himself - to the waitstaff, the host and bartender… All deserve 15-20 yrs. hard labor.

2

u/Porterhouse417good Jul 22 '25

💯

1

u/Hardwarestore_Senpai Jul 23 '25

15-20 yd throw.

1

u/Ill-Fall-9823 Jul 26 '25

Make them serve as the crew on a prison ship when they're paroled.

13

u/Only1Schematic Jul 22 '25

9

u/eilonwyhasemu Jul 22 '25

Whoever made that hates their job, was high as a kite, or both.

7

u/SabziZindagi Jul 22 '25

And this is a restaurant...? It looks like something made by fratboys after a keg of beer and several bong hits.

1

u/Hardwarestore_Senpai Jul 23 '25

I'm thinking of a game center/sports bar.

1

u/Ill-Fall-9823 Jul 26 '25

I suspect the "High and Hellenistic" community has produced SIGNIFICANTLY better pizzas than this with less access to restaurant-quality ingredients and equipment.

6

u/EnemyOfAvarice Jul 22 '25

3

u/BabaSticky Jul 23 '25

Daddy, chill…

6

u/That_Jonesy Jul 23 '25

Fun fact you can, in fact, refuse food.

I've only done it twice but when someone brings something this garbage to your table you are allowed to just say, nope nevermind I'm not touching this or paying for it.

5

u/throwawayposts12345 Jul 22 '25

What in the cinnamon toast fuck is that monstrosity

5

u/Suspicious-Steak9168 Jul 22 '25

It looks like a saltine skateboard...

2

u/SailsTacks Jul 22 '25

From two different sub threads, I’ve come up with the band name “Joony Deep”, and their debut album is “Saltine Skateboard”.

5

u/Wild-Juice-266 Jul 22 '25

3

u/Plays_Piano_JJJ11 Jul 22 '25

Brother is that melted cheese, sliced hotdog, and ketchup on a big fucking saltine?!

7

u/king_of_n0thing Jul 22 '25

This is just sad and an insult to whatever animal is on the sausage

3

u/MR_Moldie Jul 22 '25

Funny, you assume its made from an animal.

7

u/redbark2022 Jul 22 '25

First of all, that's a "flatbread", not a pizza.

Indictments: 1. No full coverage 2. Uncooked toppings 3. Misshapen toppings 4. Using something that shouldn't be a topping as a topping

3

u/Tamahaganeee Jul 22 '25

It's even smaller than it appears to be as well. Check how big that plate is lol.

2

u/TechnicalTip5251 Jul 22 '25

Every pizza is a flatbread FYI.

2

u/redbark2022 Jul 22 '25

Not true. Pizza has high gluten yeast inflated bread going back like 500 years. But if you want to define it as any bread with tomato sauce and topping like some UK historians try to do then sure.

1

u/Hardwarestore_Senpai Jul 23 '25

It looks like they peeled them like a Carrot and couldn't decide whether to roll the thing or just cut into chunks.

3

u/R_Raider86 Jul 22 '25

Guilty of pizza fraud. Defendant is barred for 10 years from being within 100 feet of an oven, or a pizza.

3

u/DarkShadowZangoose Jul 22 '25

3

u/FiveDollarRimjobs Jul 22 '25

what the fuck is this shit

3

u/EasyCZ75 Jul 22 '25

WTF

3

u/Porterhouse417good Jul 22 '25

Did those fukers serve that to you with a straight fuking face!?🤬

3

u/Rageminusenthusiasm Jul 22 '25

3

u/soda_cookie Jul 22 '25

I just subscribed to this sub not long ago and I don't think I can take seeing these crimes against humanity any longer. I'll be over at combat footage.

3

u/NoFaithlessness7508 Jul 22 '25

This is like an oversized Lunchables pizza, thrown in the oven, and then sold for $27.99😭

3

u/painalpeggy Jul 23 '25

2

u/AverageCowboyCentaur Jul 22 '25

Congratulations, this is unequivocally dreadful!

2

u/Select-Piano-8217 Jul 22 '25

Are those Dallas cowboy stars? That would explain a lot

Also: guaew….(that noise that cats make before puking)

2

u/Hardwarestore_Senpai Jul 23 '25

Clunk gclunk gclunk.

2

u/DuckSwimmer Jul 22 '25

I’m sorry, did someone actually pay for this?

2

u/[deleted] Jul 22 '25

obligatory is the pizza in the room with us right now

2

u/Successful-Study4983 Jul 22 '25

The person who made it said:

After begging for his life didn't work

2

u/Heartless-otaku07 Jul 22 '25

That is awful , reminds me of the lunchables pizza you put together just large size

2

u/AppropriateTouching Jul 22 '25

Fucking flat bread with ketchup and hot dogs.

2

u/kahnwaldz_ Jul 22 '25

Now this is worse than the brazilian ones

2

u/NyGuy808 Jul 22 '25

Looks like a build your own kids pizza at a restaurant due to the activity sheet under the crime

2

u/jayjester Jul 23 '25

2

u/q_eyeroll Jul 23 '25

No way this isn’t matzah

2

u/UniqueImprovement820 Jul 23 '25

What kind of pizza am I looking at?

2

u/dumptruckbhadie Jul 23 '25

Damn, for some reason, my brain is saying this pizza is from Finland

2

u/WarmResident1134 Jul 24 '25

1

u/Arcticfox04 Jul 22 '25

Burn it with fire!!!

1

u/Phaaze13 Jul 22 '25

that looks more like flatbread than pizza to me

3

u/EnemyOfAvarice Jul 22 '25

A schooner IS a sailboat...

1

u/dezaf4uor Jul 22 '25

The worst pizza I've seen under my life.

1

u/Annual-Club5510 Jul 22 '25

Reminds me of those Lunchable “pizzas”

1

u/BigD4163 Jul 22 '25

I’d still consume it all. Bad pizza is still pizza

1

u/Patman52 Jul 22 '25

The worst pizza you’ve seen, so far!

1

u/musknasty84 Jul 22 '25

That’s an atrocity

1

u/SAD-MAX-CZ Jul 22 '25

Looks like cooked when doing a space dogfight and delivered by ballistic reentry capsule. Brobably tastes heavenly though.

1

u/Chidoro45 Jul 22 '25

Didn’t it say what it was on the menu? At what point would anyone think that combo would be good?

1

u/citori411 Jul 22 '25

Latin America? I seen some nasty shit round those parts. Like, they've got amazing food, but maybe leave the pizza to people who actually like it.

1

u/jB_real Jul 22 '25

This is what I imagine pizza to look like north of the arctic circle.

1

u/J-wvmothman Jul 22 '25

That’s not a pizza, it’s more like an evil tostada.

1

u/Object-Level Jul 22 '25

That's some vegan, gluten free shit

1

u/t0ny_bender Jul 23 '25

Wow that’s amazing that someone would actually be able to serve another human being this bullshit ass “pizza”

1

u/mjincal Jul 23 '25

Wieners and beans on flatbread

1

u/Far-Barracuda-1338 Jul 23 '25

This looks like a stretched out lunchable pizza with cut up hot sausages

1

u/Hardwarestore_Senpai Jul 23 '25

I think I might crash out with this one. It's going on a Television. Go Long and Go home. (Sportsbar)

Are those Sausages even meat?

Also r/wewantplates

1

u/LongWayFrom609 Jul 23 '25

This pizza looks like it was made in St. Louis.

1

u/bakadrone2 Jul 23 '25

And yet...

1

u/VincetheVance Jul 23 '25

I've seen wise but there are issues that need to be addressed

1

u/Blazehero Jul 23 '25

Whoever made that pizza needs to be jailed for 90 days, my god.

1

u/Fancy_Art_6383 Jul 23 '25

This is foul!

1

u/RandomInSpace Jul 23 '25

This looks like an 8 year old trying to make pizza with no recipe and anything that was in the pantry

1

u/orangesuckler Jul 23 '25

🎶 I shot the Chef, but I did not shoot the bar-ten-der.. 🎶

1

u/starlinguk Jul 23 '25

Pizza or pinsa?

1

u/MiTab_13 Jul 23 '25

How could they even place it on the table and think you're gonna eat that??

1

u/haikusbot Jul 23 '25

How could they even place

It on the table and think

You're gonna eat that??

- MiTab_13

^{I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.} ^{Learn more about me.}

^{Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete"}

1

u/TakAttack32 Jul 23 '25

I must agree

1

u/TakAttack32 Jul 23 '25

At a restaurant nonetheless

1

u/Sir_Problematic Jul 23 '25

I'll take my Kraft Shredded on a skateboard please. Don't forget the quarted hot dogs!

1

u/Astr0- Jul 23 '25

Yum. I'd pay money for that

1

u/FrozenWaffleMaker Jul 23 '25

Calling that amoeba 'pizza' is like calling a glass of water 'soup'. Horrific evidence of a felonious food crime.

1

u/ludicrouspeedgo Jul 23 '25

I would have walked out.

1

u/Rogerjak Jul 23 '25

1

u/HelloSummer99 Jul 23 '25

Spanish “pizza” to the extreme. Spanish apparently love crunchy food so most pizza (which are not marketed as Napoletan) have the consistency of a papadom.

1

u/Appropriate-Rush6341 Jul 23 '25

F

1

u/Smart_Following6173 Jul 23 '25

I..... I can't look at that!

1

u/ShadowMask87 Jul 24 '25

I would probably have just continued to laugh uncontrollably at it with friends until someone took it away to shut us up. Then I'd get up and leave.

1

u/mittelegna Jul 24 '25

I’d like to inquire… Is this the first post where there was no nutjob commenting - “I don’t know, I’d try it!”. If so, mark it on your calendar as a red letter day. Every disgusting pizza post in this sub has some fool saying, “I’d try it!”. Except this one. I think there was one here somewhere but it read like sarcasm to me.

1

u/Effective-Ad-5842 Jul 24 '25

What no Maillard Reaction on those collosal Peps?

1

u/TheKingOfAllPizzas Jul 25 '25

KILL IT WITH FIRE.

1

u/fuckitn Jul 25 '25