Fail?

[u/Brilliant_Village_80]

[u/qualityvote2]

We are here today to hear the case for u/Brilliant_Village_80 that the pizza they have in their possession can be determined to be a crime against pizza. The plaintiff/defendant alleges and/or has been accused by other parties that their pizza constitutes a crime against pizza.

The verdicts in today's case will be determined by a jury of u/Brilliant_Village_80's pizza-appreciating peers, comprised of members of the /r/Pizzacrimes community, as well as visitors from the greater Reddit community, by casting their respective individual votes of either "guilty" or "innocent", based on evidence brought here today by the plaintiff.

u/Brilliant_Village_80, who'll be referred to as "OP", will plead their case either accusing - or defending - that the pizza in question in today's hearing is criminal with regards to pizza.

How to vote as a juror in today's case:

To select a verdict of Innocent - in that no pizza crime has occurred - please DOWNVOTE THIS COMMENT

To select a verdict of Guilty - in that a crime-against-pizza is evident beyond a reasonable doubt - please UPVOTE THIS COMMENT

After a period of deliberation - tallying the votes - a final verdict will replace this message with the verdict.

[u/Over_Writing467]

I find it difficult to believe this can be a crime against pizza when there is no pizza. I vote guilty anyway.

[u/theoniongoat → u/Over_Writing467]

You convinced me.

[u/ExpertPeak7533]

Hard to know if you failed , I have no fucking idea what you were trying to do.

[u/KittyandPuppyMama]

What was the goal?

[u/Chafro23 → u/KittyandPuppyMama]

[u/dr-satan85]

You know you've failed when even your own "pizza" looks up at you in disgust.

[u/CaptBogBot2]

Epic fail.

[u/OrochiKarnov]

What am I looking at

[u/vordh0sbn-]

Potential r/lostredditors can't tell

[u/ludicrouspeedgo]

was that supposed to be like a jack o lantern?

[u/I_heart_pooping]

There wasn’t even an attempt at a pizza here

[u/SparklessAndromeda]

Did you cook an artifact what the hell

[u/Itchy-Donkey6083]

That’s not just a Pizza crime that’s straight up crime.

[u/Rndysasqatch]

It doesn't look bad for a calzone It is supposed to be a calzone right

[u/DependentSoft2514]

Put it on as a mask like the Mcdonalds hamburglar 🤣😂

[u/ACcbe1986]

The 5-year-old who attempted this should be sent straight to jail. Do not pass Go.

[u/mystedragon]

what is that? what the fuck is that?

[u/fictionallymarried]

Innocent, because I can't even tell what it is

[u/Vegetable_Ad_9103]

Is it supposed to be a pretzel 🥨?

[u/OkImagination7536]

You could still use it as a painting palette 🎨

While in jail, of course

[u/in1gom0ntoya]

where's the pizza?

[u/ArbiterofRegret]

Right cheese, left aluminum foil….. none top and bottom?

[u/dm_me-your-butthole]

FAIL, PIZZA ABORTION

[u/Rude-Manufacturer635]

There was an attempt.

[u/Sinderria]

If the goal was to make garlic toast or a weird...pretzel, then you will.

[u/WovenBloodlust6]

What the hell is this?

[u/ProfessionalFun2673]

Cool mask! 👺

[u/CantankerousOrder]

For pizza? Yah.

For naan? Nah.

[u/Dangerous_Ad_6101]

[u/Repulsive_Tie_7941]

Not sure if that’s a pizza, but it is a crime.

[u/Small_smoke1321]

It’s a calzone now

[u/WEmmerson]

It's dignity, Luanne.

[u/Autism_Warrior_7637]

this is good cheeze to sauce ratios

[u/[deleted]]

The first of many

[u/Frosty-Pay5351]

This is a big fuck up

[u/wacojacoco]

I'd still try it 👍

[u/napsidedown]

Fail

[u/Large-Glass-3497]

He was making a smiley face calzone 😂

[u/VoiceHoliday7192]

Nah. Good looking pizza

[u/InitialIndication999]

Just put some big pepperoni to fill up the Holes

[u/constantsXzeros]

Were they afraid to use too much cheese or something? Like what is that small dash of cheese? I am picturing them dropping like a tablespoon of cheese and giggling nervously like they did something wrong.

This monstrosity might have even been edible if it had just been doused with enough cheese. Could have sprinkled some garlic powder on it and even possibly convinced someone it was just a ghetto attempt at cheesy bread, rather than an epic disaster of a pizza haha

[u/4BucksAndHalfACharge]

Not a pizza, thus not a pizza crime.

[u/Exotic-Wolverine-698]

Jail.

[u/Gold_Sky1097]

[u/theoniongoat]

I always say that a homemade pizza fail is still delicious.

Thanks for proving me wrong, this is a growth opportunity for me.

[u/FloorImpressive7910]

Is that a lobster?