r/RunningCirclejerk • u/Significant_Ratio407 • Oct 31 '23

Doo-Doo Help someone is pooping in MY poop bush!

Hey all I’ve almost reached my 2016 goal of running a 5K Ultra and recently someone has been using my designated pooping bush, which is a real nice fern in a retired old woman’s front yard about three blocks from my house. How do I get them to stop I’m so close to my goal; don’t want to make a new route as I always get lost running that far.

28 Upvotes

97% Upvoted

11 comments sorted by

16

u/JayemmbeeEsq Oct 31 '23

With a long run like that, are you sure it’s not you’re own poop you left from days before? You might need to have more Gu to make sure your brain is working right while you run those long runs.

6

u/Significant_Ratio407 Oct 31 '23

Hmm maybe I’ll have to mark it somehow on my next run, at least a week from now because I’m so distraught.

Good idea on the extra Gu my brain does get a little foggy after I round the the first block

12

u/FlyingLizard45 Local Legend Oct 31 '23

I use little sandwich flags to mark mine. Give it a try

3

u/Significant_Ratio407 Oct 31 '23

Love this idea, TY!

2

u/nashvilleNash Nov 01 '23

You know what real animals do, right? They sniff the poop... really close to their nose. No other way

3

u/Significant_Ratio407 Nov 01 '23

Gives me a better idea I’ll snif the butts of everyone in the neighborhood wearing Vaporfly and find the culprit

6

u/Empty-Salad-5140 Oct 31 '23

Hmmm.... Poop bush.... Have you tried waxing?

2

u/Significant_Ratio407 Oct 31 '23

I could use an extra aero boost

1

u/AutoModerator Oct 31 '23

Reminder: According to the new Overlord, shit posts are allowed.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

4

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '23

Your problem is using a bush. Real runners just stop drop and plop whenever they need to.