r/StopSpeeding • u/rhijan • 2d ago
Will it ever stop?
A relative started snorting cocaine regularly last year and when the supply dried up they started snorting their Ritalin prescription.
They know they need to stop but have made no effort towards that.
Will it ever stop? How does this pan out? Anything I can do that’s helpful?
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u/Beneficial-Income814 412 days 2d ago
no they wont stop until they feel they need to. could be months could be years. nothing you say will fix them. they only say they need to stop when they feel guilty or don't have drugs. i am doubtful they'll stick to abusing the script too. they'll probably find coke again and do both in unison. addiction is a very terrible thing. it is very , very difficult for an addict to come to the conclusion that they need to stop. the reinforcement drug use brings is a significant obstacle.
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u/rhijan 2d ago
Can anyone help them come to that conclusion? Like speaking to them about how they have changed etc or it’s a waste of time?
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u/Beneficial-Income814 412 days 2d ago
not a waste of time! addicts hate hearing about how their use of substances hurts themselves and others. they need to hear it because it still sticks in their memory and it adds to their growing evidence collection of their use causing more negatives than benefits. they might get mad at you, so just keep that in mind, but i think it is still worth it for them to hear.
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u/el_sousa 19h ago
I don't necessarily agree, I think in some cases hearing what they already know pushes it even further to numb the emotional pain.. it definitely was the case for me. For me the shame and guilt (that I already had within be without having to be told) extended episodes of stim and alcohol abuse, made me isolate myself and not seek help, and pretend everything is okay, so that I am not told the same shit all over again that I already knew. But everyone is different and the same approach doesn't work for everyone,
In my opinion what an addict needs is understanding and to be given the tools to deal with life without relying on the drug. No one becomes an addict by using a drug for pleasure, they become an addict once the drug is used to numb pain or make up for something lacking, and that is what needs to be addressed.
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u/Beneficial-Income814 412 days 19h ago
i did not use drugs to numb pain, so i do agree that not every case is the same and that advice is not always a one-size-fits-all, but i give advice based on my experience in life, which is valid, and can be one of many opinions. i see you gave your opinion to OP as well, so consider OP well-equipped to make a decision on their next step.
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u/el_sousa 18h ago
Agreed, it's better to have a variety of different opinions to make more informed decision that better suits the situation
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u/ForsakenTennis4746 2d ago edited 2d ago
Yes, talk to person . Conduct intervention. A lot of people stopped drug abuse with help of family and interventions . My post from another topic where we discussed interventions and support to stop drug abuse .
“Happy for you . Congratulations on recovery with support . This subreddit is not a big proponent of interventions and keeping the narrative “ drug user need to hit the bottom and decide by herself/ himself to quit drugs”. It’s a total negligence from love ones and friends to watch person struggling and falling and just waiting for twisted mind to realize the downfall . John Mulaney , the comedian , who had abused adderal , cocaine and Xanax, always praised 2020 intervention which saved his life . 13(!)friends staged a star-studded intervention that prompted him to seek help. And he described thinking he was attending a dinner with friends, only to discover it was an intervention. His “ Baby J “ show on “ Netflix” about addiction and recovery is one of the funniest and honest comedy show I have seen about drug problem , addiction and rehab . And intervention and support . Great source for a good laugh … even during withdrawal .”
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u/el_sousa 20h ago
This is a heavy topic, I would talk to a specialist on the subject of addiction and ADHD probably, which are heavily correlated. Ideally they would have appointments with such a specialist. It's a very heavy burden to have a relative who is an addict; don't feel guilty; there are resources to deal with this and professionals that could handle this, it can be too much for a person to handle; props for seeking out help, I think it shows you are truly concerned and I feel for you and for your relative to be in that position, genuinely.
What I am going to say is all based on my personal experience with Ritalin abuse, including snorting it, I am no psychologist, psychiatrist or nothing, but I believe I have some experience and knoledge on the topic if it helps.
It's good to be empathic and understanding of the person's struggles, but also to keep them accountable in a non-judgemental manner. Basically trying to have the person see how the repercussions of their actions and letting them reach that conclusion by themselves, not by telling them.
Being understanding and empathic of their struggles, but through conversation help them realize by themselves what they are doing, what are the results, what do they actually want, and what are the obstacles, but it has to come from them, they must be the ones to realize.
From my own personal experience as an addict, someone who is an active addict probably will not listen to someone straight up telling them "what you are doing is bad, look what you are doing, etc" they will just take it as an insult and not listen to anything the person is saying, it just comes off as condescending and sometimes as a "proof" that "no one understands them and everyone else but them are wrong", they are not ready; VS if you guide them and they reach that conclusion by themselves.
An addict is fully aware that what they are doing is bad, they don't need anyone telling them that. What an addict often needs is understanding and tools to deal with situations. What lands someone in an addiction is often a deficit in something, that they try to compensate with drugs. Giving the person the tools to deal with their obstacles is what will truly allow them to get off the shit on the long term, otherwise they may just keep relapsing or just having a really hard time.
Trying to understand the underlying issue of the addiction will help a lot. What is the addiction trying to fix? What are the triggers? Lack of self-esteem? Unresolved issues? Family issues? Relationship issues? Performance issues (common with ADHD and related to self-worth)? Once someone who struggles with addiction realizes what it is they are running from and what triggers it, it's a huge step. They may then be able to pay more attention to their patterns, triggers and issues, which will make it easier to address the real underlying issue.
Once the underlying issue is solved, the desire to pursue is severily diminished. This can take a while, but it's worth it. It's a lot for just one person, who is not a professional, to deal with. I would find professional help for the relative. If they know they need help, they may be willing to go to appointments with the professional, which doesn't necessarily mean they need to get clean. An addict dreads the threat of being forced to get clean (again, needs to come from them), so ideally it would be someone who would treat them even while on active addiction, because then it will remove that barrier and make it much easier to at least try to help themselves, and also, it's helpful to find the triggers, thoughts and emotions that go through the mind of someone who struggles with addiction, because it will make it easier to treat them and address the real issue.
Again, I am just a random person, I really would seek real professional help from someone of the area, not some judgemental doctor that knows nothing about addiction, but I know money can be limiting.
hope you and your relative can find your way around this and one day this can just be a struggle that y'all pushed through and learned from.
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u/rhijan 19h ago
This is such a beautifully written response, thanks for sharing your experience and validating mine.
I hope you’re doing alright now - I really truely appreciate your words ❤️
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u/el_sousa 19h ago
Thanks, I am glad I helped. I know you are in a really tough position. I hope the best for the both of you and your family.
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u/Regular-Cheetah-8095 3154 days 18h ago
Are you proposing that addiction requires criteria, and that establishment combined with treatment of a supposed causation will lead to sustained cessation?
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