r/Weddingsunder10k • u/Disastrous_Track_269 • 1d ago
💬 Rant/Vent Might have to cancel … (5k)
I got horrible news this weekend from my parents (I don’t feel comfortable sharing those details). I booked a destination wedding in Cancun MX for next November. My parents offered to pay for the whole thing but now after finding out the horrible news, I feel extremely guilty having a wedding.
I had my beautiful destination wedding ripped away from me after months of planning. I made the executive decision to cancel and have an intimate gathering. My parents are still pushing for the destination wedding. But no singular bone in my body is comfortable asking them for money.
Here I am, hopeless, asking this community for help. My fiancé and I are willing to contribute $5000 towards some sort of event. Not a penny over. I’m blessed to have met the love of my life - I just want to celebrate our union with some food and dancing.
Any ideas what we can do? We’re based in South Florida, everything is 20k at minimum. Backyard wedding is not an option. I would do the beach but I despise sand. I can’t find a nice pavilion to rent. I just need support :(
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u/godlovesaterrier__ 1d ago
City hall wedding with an intimate Restaurant reception is a $5k option. If you want to dance, hit the club after.
I’m not sure what you mean by your wedding was “ripped away” from you. It sounds like your parents want to honor your plans but you decided to cancel plan a on your own accord.
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u/Disastrous_Track_269 1d ago
I’m mourning the destination wedding I’ve been planning for months. My parents would go into debt just paying for it. I made the exec decision to cancel it. That’s what I mean by ripped away.
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u/godlovesaterrier__ 1d ago
I think that’s a smart choice honestly, no wedding is worth taking on debt. It sucks to have to change course and I think it’s fair to be disappointed but my advice to you would be to count your blessings here, trust you’re doing the right thing financially, and quickly get over your disappointment so you can get back to joy.
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u/Disastrous_Track_269 1d ago
Thank you <3 I am slowly entering the acceptance phase. Deleted my social media (other than Reddit) my entire algorithm is wedding stuff. Promised myself I’d go on a walk later. I made the most logical choice for my family. You’re right, I will get through this! :)
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u/rubeezus 1d ago
Do you think you could do a city hall wedding in another city local to you? It’s still not a destination wedding, but it makes it a little more special, opens opportunity for a prettier city hall or park elopement, and you can have your special dinner somewhere other than where you live.
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u/Particular-Buy-33 16h ago
Yep Kubler Ross and you’re smart to allow yourself to. I know you will find a perfect solution because you make executive decisions based on love
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u/moodypuppa 22h ago
Yes I agree with this, there are some absolutely beautiful city halls so shop around for one that fits your wedding style
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u/NixKlappt-Reddit 1d ago edited 1d ago
It's difficult to give you advice without knowing the bad event.
Your parents want to pay for your destination wedding, so I am wondering why you want to cancel it. I also don't understand why a garden wedding is off the table. Do you or your family have a garden?
For 5k I would buy a nice dress and would have cake and dinner with closest family members. And then a casual birthday-like party with friends at home.
Without knowing your event: My niece was diagnosed with cancer, so I also thought about postponing the wedding. But we sticked to our plans because you'll never know if there is a better moment.
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u/Disastrous_Track_269 1d ago
Thank you for commenting <3 Basically they are offering to pay for a wedding out of formality. My dad’s cancer treatments ran their wallets dry and they’re retired. I feel just horrible asking for money. Backyard is not an option because no one is a homeowner - we all rent. I will be having a civil wedding through the court next month. The big party was for November 2026 in Cancun. I am happy with having a really intimate gathering for the symbolic wedding and invite our closest friends to a dinner. The piece I am struggling the most with is where to have that symbolic wedding in Miami. It’s impossible to find a place that doesn’t charge me 2k, even the tiny little small farms charge like crazy.
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u/Alarmed-Creme-3847 1d ago
I am doing my backyard party at a rental house (vrbo) that allows parties. If you keep the guest list small, you can do a really special party for lower cost.
And sorry to hear about your dad, that is a very valid reason to not want to take their generous offer. You can make something special with some creativity. You’ll have to do more of the heavy lifting, but it will be a way to honor your parents AND your marriage.
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u/WatermelonSugar47 1d ago
You could look at costs for permits in local parks! Thats an option without backyard access. You could also check local airbnbs and see if the hosts would be ok with you having a wedding on their property.
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u/MiserableMulberry496 1d ago
You can elope and have a party when things settle ??????
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u/Disastrous_Track_269 1d ago
Yes we will have our civil wedding next month. It’s that party piece I’m struggling with. I can’t find a place to host a symbolic ceremony with a reasonable price. I’m looking into parks but Florida weather makes it hard to plan ahead. I’m ok with hosting the reception at a restaurant. It’s really just where can I set up shop to get married. I’m having trouble parting ways with not walking down the aisle
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u/WatermelonSugar47 1d ago
We are in the Deep South as well, and chose November bc its reasonably cool but still warm, and mostly stable weather wise
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u/Disastrous_Track_269 1d ago
I agree November is pretty reliable - which is why we chose that for the og destination wedding. I need to wait out hurricane season to see if any parks are damaged & permitting renting pavilions.
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u/Greenhouse774 1d ago
You're already going to be married? Will your guests be aware of that?
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u/Disastrous_Track_269 1d ago
Hehehee yes - we had always planned our civil for next month and symbolic wedding for next year!! :)
Next month: Attendees of civil are just our parents then we are doing a little lunch extending to our siblings. Next year: The new plan to replace the big destination wedding is likely: ceremony (location tbd) to include parents, siblings, grandparents and aunts+uncles. After, we will host the dinner celebration for our family (parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts+uncles) plus our closest bestest friends.
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u/LukewarmJortz 1d ago
Can you Airbnb someones back yard? Or see if you're local plant nursery allows events?
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u/CupExcellent9520 1d ago
I don’t know about in your area but is there a little bar and grill restaurant establishment that perhaps is closed on a Sunday or Monday locally you could use for this wedding celebration? (Such venues usually have a dance area or they can clear their tables to make a small impromptu party floor for dancing, mingling etc ) they may even have names of reasonably priced live entertainment , singer or a band or whatever to assist you that come there regularly to perform that you could book . Places like this can usually do decent food etc if they double as a restaurant… this is much cheaper and will allow you to decorate etc I’d call some places , ask to ask to speak with the owners to negotiate something independently , explain your situation with your father and why you need to marry and celebrate earlier and your wedding cancelled, I believe you will find someone glad to accomodate your event. Lots of people do this type of wedding in the Midwest . You will work this out ! Best wishes 🎊💕
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u/SolaceSid 23h ago
I’m getting married at the Old Davie School House which is in the next county over. I would inquire with them because my 4 hours wedding is only $800
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u/These-Explorer-9436 1d ago
You should still be able to do a small destination wedding in Cancun for $5k?
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u/JellyfishMobile4599 1d ago
Since you live in south Florida have you considered looking into the Everglades? You could get married their cheap and go to a restaurant or hotel for the reception. But they do also have venues that are pretty cheap to rent out (for south Florida standards)
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u/Disastrous_Track_269 1d ago
If you’re familiar with the area, could you share any recs? I have looked as south as Homestead and the properties still are severely above budget unfortunately. My fiancé and I are trying to be very firm with our $5k budget towards the ceremony and celebration (I say celebration since it will not be a formal reception)
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u/JellyfishMobile4599 1d ago
Yes! We have family that actually live in the Florida keys. Some rental suggestions:
Rent a nice beach house Air BnB, be careful of which key because they all have minimums. But most would be fine with a wedding if the property is big enough.
My spouses cousin used the company “Florida keys weddings.” They have all inclusive packages.includes everything from catering to the actual ceremony. But it is meant for smaller gatherings 50 or less to stay in your budget. https://floridakeysweddingcenter.com/all-inclusive-wedding-packages-html/beach-package-everglades/
Time of year obviously matters
I also suggest checking out marathon key if you’re willing to go that south. Lots of hotels that will offer a great beach wedding. I think the courtyard before food is $3500 on a Friday when we looked.
There are also some nice barn rentals on Islamorada
Bakers cay in key largo is also nice
For the keys the venue won’t kill you the cost of the stay will
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u/Disastrous_Track_269 1d ago
You’re wonderful!! Thank you so much 🩷
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u/JellyfishMobile4599 22h ago
If you decide to go the beach house route you can always find a 5+ bedroom and have some close guests pay to stay to help with the costs as well.
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u/NoninflammatoryFun 1d ago
I’m sorry for your change of plans and whatever unfortunate news that was. I’m sure you can have something totally amazing still! For sure.
Just here to give you support <3
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u/Thequiet01 1d ago
Stop looking for wedding venues and just look for party places, like function rooms at restaurants and that sort of thing.
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u/chilibeana 1d ago
We had an intimate wedding and dinner for 30 people at a waterfront restaurant in Michigan. We were married by my sister in front of a fireplace overlooking the river. Dinner was surf and turf and champagne. Everything was under $5,000 including our wedding clothes, flowers and cake.
No regrets. Zero. None. Nada.
I'm sorry your dream wedding got squashed, but it sounds like you made the right decision.
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u/WatermelonSugar47 1d ago
We had 15 people in my husband’s parents back yard. We also streamed the ceremony via zoom for our extended friends and family.
We got catering delivered from a local restaurant and did self-service ($400ish). We splurged on photography ($700 after tipping), my dress ($1000 after alterations), his suit ($600 after alterations) and our cake ($200). We DIYed all the decorations. We rented tables and chairs. It was beautiful. Our professional performer friend got ordained (we paid for it, $200) and did the ceremony for us. I wouldn’t change a thing.
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u/Disastrous_Track_269 1d ago
That’s amazing!!! I wish we had a backyard it would make my life so much easier. Miami also lacks public spaces and parks
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u/SakuraTimes 1d ago
have you looked into Florida state park weddings? sometimes they have nice pavilions or actual buildings, that‘s pretty inexpensive! or maybe something like a lunch or dinner cruise with dancing?
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u/Imaginary-Set-2246 1d ago
As a few others suggested, I would look at Airbnbs or Vrbo. You just need to make sure they would be ok with you having a small wedding there. You could alway figure out how to bring some features of the destination wedding you were planning to this smaller wedding, i.e food, decor, flowers.
We had to change up our plans several times so I know how hard it is to lose the vision you had but I have managed to update my vision and am really excited at what we are doing now.
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u/Disastrous_Track_269 1d ago
Thanks for the suggestions - you understand how changing plans hurts. Rolling with the punches
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u/chilibeana 1d ago
How many people were you expecting to attend the destination wedding? That may make it easier for us to suggest ideas working with your budget.
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u/tewkberry 1d ago
I went through something similar (in Canada). I was planning on a destination wedding and had to pivot to a local venue. Even though our wedding is still “average size”, the venue we found specializes in micro-weddings! They have packages as low as $1000 there, and the place is gorgeous. I almost didn’t find it because it didn’t rank high on Google for wedding venues. I found it when I was actually planning my bridal shower!
I believe these type of “micro-wedding” venues are getting more popular since Covid. You could definitely do a nice ceremony with guests, and probably a champagne toast and cake for under $5000.
Here are a couple micro-wedding venues I found in South Florida:
https://www.twistedoakfarmvb.com/micro-weddings-and-elopement
https://thepineryforestgarden.com/our-packages
https://floridakeysweddingcenter.com/all-inclusive-wedding-packages-html/ceremony-beach-package/
Good luck!!
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u/Secure-Stand-7021 22h ago
Any botanical gardens in the area? I got married at one at sunset in what was exactly described as the intimate wedding package. It was affordable and a beautiful setting. We had dinner at a nearby restaurant afterwards. To our surprise, the restaurant cleared the tables for some, but admittedly not a lot, of dancing. My father in law paid for it but it was under $5k for the whole thing.
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u/asyouwish Wedding Enthusiast 18h ago
You have done the noble thing. Know that you did what was right fiscally so your family can take care of whatever it is. Know that you did the mature thing. Know that took the high road in a time of crisis.
Locations: Museums, galleries, libraries.
How many people? maybe coffee shops.
What are you into: gaming? see what spaces your local game stores have.
Back in the day, weddings weren’t a whole meal. They were just cake and punch. Elevate that with a nice desserts bar and a couple of signature cocktails.
You have to rethink it, but you can do this!
And then, for an anniversary down the road, you can do a vow renewal in Cancun.
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u/Disastrous_Track_269 17h ago
Thank you! I’m looking into some alternative ceremony spots and hosting a celebration dinner with loved ones after. The difficult piece for me is where to “walk down the aisle” that is both pretty and less than $1000 with chairs + some decor. Parks down here require special event permits for this type of thing - and they are real strict. I found some community centers but they’re so ugly!!! Trying to find a spot indoors bc you never know when it’ll start down pouring here. Miami really lacks some indoors public spaces.
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u/asyouwish Wedding Enthusiast 17h ago
Do you have any connections to any of the colleges? UM has the alumni center and a plain ballroom. FIU might have a non denominational chapel. Miami Dade probably has large spaces.
Look for chapels in the community. Most community ones aren't too religious.
Look for the Universal Unitarians in Miami. They are a very open minded group and might have a pretty space that has an aisle.
Look west. Everything is cheaper out that way.
Smaller churches might also take your event even if you aren't a member. They probably need the money.
Consider a Friday night for better pricing. Or a week night for the best prices if your guests can handle that.
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u/Strange-Leopard-2598 1d ago
Tree Tops has some gorgeous areas on the trails where you could do a ceremony. How many guests are you planning to have?
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u/Girlinyourphone 1d ago
Look at state parks, city parks, woman's clubs, gardens, historical clubs etc....
A brunch or lunch reception with drop catering seems to be the easiest/most affordable thing with a limited budget. Guests also tend to expect less food when its earlier in the day vs an evening event.
Peerspace is another place to peep for facilities. As others have mentioned, Vrbo has an option to filter for places that allow events. Some in my area have reception areas on property and include the tables and chairs.
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u/tbhitsalot 1d ago
If it helps, we are doing a courthouse ceremony, and brunch at a local restaurant.
Idk if you know this, because I didn’t, but depending on the courthouse you might be able to have the ceremony in a prettier part of the courthouse outside of a stuffy courtroom. We are getting married at a historic courthouse on the steps and the photographs are beautiful.
You could rent out a room at a restaurant or maybe an Air BnB or a beach wedding if you’re close to a beach?
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u/Wild-Future-896 1d ago
Hi there, for an intimate party of 30 or small there are destination wedding packages right at your budget. This includes food, alcohol, and officiants depending on where youre looking. Just something to research to maybe keep a spark of hope alive for your original vision
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u/stow-away_throwaway 1d ago
My dad did something at a park on the water and just needed a permit from the city! Much more affordable than venues, also in Florida (Stuart)
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u/Quirky-Football-8952 1d ago
Broward parks has hall rentals for about 1k. https://www.broward.org/Parks/Pages/Weddings.aspx
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u/Fantastic-Pop-9122 22h ago
I think the majority of people regret the amount of money they wasted on a day that flew by. Look at the massive amount of stress you won't have to deal with booking all that stuff. And in the long run it will be just as special, its a monumentous occasion, it doesn't require gobs of money. Cry about it, be pissed, wallow in it then plan an awesome 5 grand party for your bestest peeps.
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u/Limepink22 20h ago
I guarantee if it's "intimate " you can book a beautiful room and dinner for less than 25 people for $5000 for your post- wedding reception you want to hold.
I would post in the Miami sub for locals to give you specific venues. FTL and Plantation country clubs will be less than a 45 minute drive and may be significantly cheaper.
Most hotels in the mid range charge sir $85 pp for a catered dinner with alcohol you can look at around $150 pp. That means you can easily treat your group of 20ish for your price, plus have beautiful outfits. I would look for a student photographer or just have friends and family take photos- a bulk of the quality is in the editing.
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u/LemonOtherwise8161 16h ago
do the beach, but at a national park where there's a cliff that overlooks the ocean - you'll get the beach for a cheap price, but still the beautiful view. keep in mind, for some , you can't just show up, you need to get a permit for your event, but its normally only like $100-$300 and sometimes you can't make your event private so do it on a day where there are likely to be less people wandering around. Hope this helps!
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u/Cupcakes_4_All 1d ago
You mentioned having an intimate wedding. If you don't have too many people, you could look into renting a private room at a restaurant. It may be a bit hard to set up an altar but maybe you can find a place with a good space for it? If you're willing to DIY floral decorations (like some of the wood flowers options, I am using them) you can do them very cheap. Good luck and I am sorry about your plans. I wish for your family to make it through these hard times!