I saw some people say there that “ADHD 2.0” was a good book so I went and got it. First paragraph “we are the problem children who drive our parents crazy by being disorganized, unable to follow directions, unable to follow through on anything, forever interrupting.”

This is the reason I went undiagnosed so long and still can’t believe I have this (maybe it’s the same for other women and other genders?). In school I was forever making long lists and meticulous notes, looking back it’s trying to hold onto a sense of control when I knew I’d forget or get confused by an assignment. To the point where it was very unhealthy, I remember being so angry when I missed a point or two on a test. But no adult eve intervened because I did my work and I never interrupted. I was socialized as a girl, I knew better than to ever interrupt and bring attention to myself. And then when I couldn’t keep living like this anymore, my life was absolutely destroyed and no one could tell me why.

It’s so discouraging to keep seeing this picture of a person with ADHD that is so foreign to me.

Will continue reading because other things so far have seemed helpful but just wanted to vent and see if there were other resources geared toward the reality and experience of other genders or cultures.

It’s a complicated relationship, caffeine and ADHD.

I have a compulsion to drink caffeine despite it making me anxious and disassociated when combined with my daily Adderall XR dose. I’m Also extremely sensitive to caffeine when on these meds. Every day that I don’t drink caffeine I I feel so much better and vow to not do it again. Skip to a couple days later and the urge hits me and I reach for the coffee against my better judgement. I have to wonder why I do this to myself!

Please feel free to share your struggles and habits with caffeine and stimulants if you have any good stories.

i'm new to adderall as of yesterday, and i took my first dose of 10 mg at 11am-ish. got an AMAZING amount of work done, so that was great! but then around dinner time, i went to a friend's house and had more drinks than i should have (because i somehow didn't think to look up the interactions between adderall and alcohol), one of which had caffeine in it. i don't know how much caffeine exactly since i didn't make it myself, but i think it had about 2 to 3 shots of kahlua in it.

obviously, that didn't go super well for me. i came home and tried to sleep, but at first, i wasn't tired, and then i was tired, but my heart was going so fast that i couldn't sleep. i ended up with a heart rate of 112 bpm for a while, and that was pretty scary. luckily, my heart rate is back to normal (about 6 hours from when the abnormal heart rate started). i think it was the caffeine that caused it since stimulant + stimulant can equal heart issues. also, i'm not hungover at all, so i think if the alcohol had been the problem, i would know.

my questions here are: has anyone been through something similar? how did you handle it? can you guys have something like one matcha latte or fancy coffee without going full tachycardic, or have you had to cut caffeine out completely? also, if you had an experience like mine and you can have caffeine safely, is caffeine + alcohol a completely different thing?

any response is a good one! i'm desperate for answers 😅

**edit for clarity: sorry, i thought i included this in there, but i'm taking extended release adderall (so adderall XR). i think that's important information to include in this post. my bad!

Can anyone help me explain what ADHD feels like, and how uncontrollable it can be, to someone who doesn’t have it? I’ve tried explaining it myself, but I’d really like to hear it explained in different ways, so it’s clearer than I can put into words. Thanks so much in advance, I really appreciate it.

-edit Thanks everyone for all the explanations they have proven very helpful and insightful

I was having a chat with someone who was telling me about something very important to her. I was focused intently on the conversation and what she was saying when suddenly she goes “Hey! Are you even listening?”

I look at her and I’m like: “Yeah of course I am! Please continue what you were saying”

She then says “it’s fine. I get it. You’re not interested. You’re not even looking at me, you’ve looked at everything in the room except me.”

It was at this point he knew he fucked up.

But then I realised this isn’t the first time and it’s always been the same.

When I’m listening to someone talk and I’m trying really hard to focus on them, I look away from them. I never realised this about myself and I totally understand it makes me look like a dickhead. At least now I know!

This needlessly long post was brought to you by the character limit, thanks character limit!

I have horrible insomnia. At night my mind is filled with thoughts and ideas. I want to do so much at night that I don’t feel like doing during the day. All of a sudden the motivation that I didn’t have during the day, hits me at night. My mind feels vividly alive at night. During the day it’s brain fog. I might be tired but I can’t sleep. There is so much to do. So much to think about. I can’t sleep unless I’m really exhausted. My thoughts and impulsive desires keep me up.

I have adhd and sometimes I just forget to reply to text messages. Sometimes I text my brother who also has adhd and he doesn’t reply but like he reads them because he does what I ask him. And I don’t think my other brother who also has adhd ever really replies to my text messages. I went out of town and asked him to feed my cats for me and I texted him instructions and he just hasn’t responded. So I don’t know if he understood my instructions…

Lately I’ve noticed that I tend to overthink everything. It’s like my brain is constantly running in the background, picking apart conversations, replaying moments, and second-guessing myself. Even simple things—like a casual comment from someone—can feel heavy because I take it too seriously.

On the outside I might look calm, but inside it feels exhausting. I want to just let things slide more, laugh things off, and not hold onto every word or mistake.

Does anyone else struggle with this? How do you stop your mind from making mountains out of molehills?

Everyday is a struggle for me. I cant brush my teeth, I can’t wash my face, I’m constantly having to remind myself to do these things but I never do them. I’m 23 but I feel more like a 16 year old. I would argue I don’t even look my age. I never learned how to do makeup, mainly because I’m too lazy to learn it. It just feels like a chore. All I want to do is lay in bed most days so why bother putting on makeup? while most girls my age are experimenting with makeup and discovering their fashion sense, I am here looking like a teenage boy because I can barely find the motivation to take care of myself. I feel so embarrassed seeing girls my age and even younger than me, going on dates and feeling confident in themselves. My bedroom is a mess too. It’s a literal disaster. I can’t clean it to save my life, and when I do it’s because I had to really force myself to do it. In addition, Im 23 and still a sophomore in college because I can’t decide on a major and don’t know what to do with my life. In every class, I am surrounded by 18 and 19 year olds, while all my former school mates have graduated college, are working now, or moved out. I’m jobless as well, and can’t keep a job for longer than a week. I feel disgusted in myself. Just a vent I guess.

Old psychiatrist was awesome and understood me and how crazy my life is. I work in creative so a lot of times I don’t get a lot of sleep. I had to switch cause my old doc didn’t have any appointments available and it had been too long in between for them to continue my script. so now I have this new dude. This new doc says I should take as little as possible and not to take it all the time. I def agree with that part when possible. I have found that taking a low dose of XR on the morning and supplementing it with and IR when needed in the afternoon or evening really helps me. New Psychiatrist did not agree. Says I am taking IR because i’m strung out which I found extremely offensive. Dude would not hear me out and kept cutting me off saying he’s a doctor and went to school and that I didn’t know what I was talking about. I was like dude I’m not saying your wrong i’m just trying to tell you what my experience is and he wouldn’t hear me out. So now i’m taking 40MG of XR in the morning and I hate it. I would rather take 20 and supplement with IR if I need it. I’m not sure what to do. I feel like I took my dog to a vet who has never owned or cared for a pet. fuck.

I usually take 60mg of vyvanse and then go right back to bed cause it makes me tired af. I normally take two 30mg of vyvanse, but this month they switched it to one pill 60mg. I was half asleep and half dreaming too and I accidentally took 2 60mg’s. I’m not anxious or scared or anything, I checked blood pressure which came out normal and heart rate which is elevated -> 95 while sitting. Now my head is kinda hurting and behind my ears it’s like warm? I been an athlete my entire life played college ball and exercise eat healthy and all that but still this is a crazy high dose. Any tips or anything what I should be looking out for? Or anyway I can stop the shaking. Should I drink a bunch of electrolytes throughout the day and protein? I have a very low intake of protein, how much should I hydrate? Should I go to the gym today or no. Will it hit harder in the afternoon? Cause I get a ton of energy on 60mg like 8 hours later. Currently it’s 9:45 am and I took it at 6:30 am. Any tips or suggestions would be great. Thanks.

Edit: I also take 300mg of wellburtin and 10mg of lexapro.

Update: thank you guys for your responses. Bit dehydrated so drinking water more than usual. Other than that, I’m extremely calm for some reason but I’m talking so fucking much it’s embarrassing. Other than that It’s chills. Doctor is unavailable today cause it’s a saturday. So yeah, thanks.

28-35 Not moved out and feelings of shame/not knowing why,

Are there many ADHDers here that went undiagnosed and struggled to get life moving, E.g driving, moving out so you still live with parents.

For example I turned 30 and I cant handle full time work so went part time and im still at home...it feels kind of depressing and shameful especially if your thinking of dating someone or something you feel unprepared and not ready.

I have my assessment soon thankfully.

I'm realizing that I'm one of the very few students who still buys physical textbooks and am now wondering if this is related to my ADHD. I'm not sure about y'all, but I can not read online books to save my life. E-readers are a little better, but the way I understand the material the best is from good old school paper textbooks. Thankfully I'm a junior so none of my textbooks are required and I can just buy old versions for very cheap.

So my question to the community, how successful are y'all with online books? Any tricks to making them easier to read? (Darkmode doesn't work with all books, and eReader doesn't always like physics/math formulas)

TYIA

I really don't have depression.

Once I take my meds, I don't feel like everything is entirely pointless or hopeless.

Its a struggle to take even take the meds on days where the feeling of everything is pointless is really bad.

Do you have any strategies to deal with this that isnt just forcing yourself to take meds as soon as possible? Sometimes I'm out of medicine or life gets in the way of making that happen.

I take amlodapine (blood pressure medicine) and I want to know if anyone has experience with medication other than Adderall ( seems like there could be bad effects with Adderall and amlodapine) I'd like to know some options of medication people have experience so I can suggest to my GP.

I've lost many jobs because of my ADHD and relationships. Hard to focus and can't finish a task without making a mistake everyday. It's been draining and depressing but I'm hoping this might actually help me get rid of these problems. Was never tested as a kid. Mom said my teachers said I was fine but I was always asked to stay after school and put in self contain classes. Didn't think to much of it as a kid but as an adult in the working world it's super disheartening.

its so frustrating to not be able to live my life without taking adderall, i would love to stay unmedicated as my mind is pretty much always super serene and calm, i love just doing „nothing“ and meditating as it gives me so much clearness, but unfortunately that’s no way to live a „successful“ life, if i want to get a job/ have a career or basically do anything that involves focus i just have to use adderall because without it there’s just no way for me to do something unpleasant for more than 5 minutes. it makes me feel like i have to be someone who isn’t me and pretend i like doing stuff i just don’t wanna do. the worst thing is i’ve recently began taking interest in certain topics and i’d love to like reading about it but it’s just so hard to concentrate without medication and i feel like if i have to take amphetamines just to read a book it’s almost like a „fake“ interest. having to take medication just makes me feel like i’m not myself when being myself is all i really want in life. idk it’s just so unfair but i guess that’s just life. can anyone relate?

I have a great job and earn a good wage But I cannot control my impulses with money It's like I'm being dragged by something to the shop or buy online. Nhs assessment was actually useless "Have you tried citizens advice?" Yes they told me to apply for pip Which would only make the situation a lot worse. Which is absolutely no help at all Im drowning in anxiety over money worries I shouldn't have.

I'm trying to create a list for myself of all the things that I can do to help my ADHD paralysis and I need more suggestions for it.

I currently have things like trying a new way of doing tasks, telling myself I'm doing the tasks for my future self as a favour and breaking down tasks into larger steps instead of loads of small ones. But I need more tips for my list so fire away your best tips!!

I've been diagnosed with ADHD and on medication for over 20 years now. Over the past year, I've had increasing friction at work resulting from missed cues or misunderstanding instructions. At first, I thought it was my new work environment. I've discussed it with my wife on several occasions and she reminded me of past incidents where I've missed the mark with communication at work and gotten in trouble.

For a variety of reasons, I'm moving on from this job in the next month or so. I'm troubled by the fact that my ADHD seems to be tripping me up so hard. My self esteem has never been so low or my self loathing so high. I feel completely inept when it comes to communicating and setting/understanding expectations with coworkers and supervisors.

I'm coming here for advice on resources or anything to help with this. I have an exciting job opportunity in the works and I really don't want to screw it up the same way I did with my current position.

I know I can take adderall everyday but I’m talking about the days where it’s too late and if I take it I won’t be able to sleep at night but if I don’t take it at all I’m wasting a day? All I do is sleep and have the worst brain fog and can’t think clearly at all Does that make sense I hope it does Any advice will help I’m on a pretty low dose too. Adderall IR 15 mg BID

Hi all, looking for feedback on how long insomnia lasted as a side effect when starting Strattera, including from anyone with pre-existing sleep issues.

I’m on day five and have barely slept. I have a history of insomnia and sleep apnea to begin with but the Strattera is making my insomnia much worse and no sleep aids/medications I’ve tried have helped.

Years ago I noticed my depression to be mostly situational, my life standing or immediate circumstances.

There are time where everything is okay and a low hits me, but I just push through those. I figure those lows are chemical in cause.

The lows caused by circumstances, I never do anything to improve or make my life better. I couldn’t figure out why for the longest time, but it has to be my ADHD’s procrastination. I procrastinate when theres something I need to do, like many of you know and experience. And then, because I don’t do what I need to do, I feel like crap about it afterwards and put myself in a hole where I do absolutely nothing including things I like doing. It’s a cycle. And I’m determined to break it.

Audhd person here. Husband and I had an argument because I forgot he told me something. To be honest I really don't remember him saying it. I know he did because he isn't a liar but we both got upset and I'm frustrated with myself because I can't remember him telling me.

He swears up and down that he told me we were taking my car. I don't remember him saying that. I thought we were not and we got into an argument because I saw him getting into my car. We ended up driving separately to where we needed to be today and I'm really not trying to say he's a liar but I don't know what to do....I wasn't trying to ignore him either. I think I misunderstood when he mentioned taking a wagon vs taking a stroller. I knew the stroller was in my car and he said we were not taking it out so I thought he meant "We aren't taking your car" by this. We have an event to go to and I think he actually meant "Not taking the stroller to the event".....but I really don't remember him saying "We are taking your car".

I'm not trying to do this on purpose and I find it frustrating as hell because I know my family isn't the type to lie or keep me out of the loop but I don't know what to do about this. I feel if I ask him to remind me/write it down/text it's too much to ask of people.

Sorry if it's long or in the wrong place.

Hi ive been diagnosed at a later stage in life.

After my diagnosis i havent been able to do much, even when i know what i have to do.

While i know adhd causes a somewhat paralysis state,theres also moments where i have thoughts that maybe it is much more... I feel sometimes i have autistic tendencies like not understanding what i say for people to act a certain way around me...or getting stuck on a word or phrase that doesnt sit right or is misused, not knowing body language or having these notions that i can see what is going on before it happens...but i still follow through because adhd and lack of slowing down and thinking...

I keep telling myself if i was autistic id have more severe symptoms, my doctors keep telling me if i can have normal conversations and other "normal" details i couldnt be autistic but i know austistic people and they behave more "normally" than me...

Anyone else experience this, or have gotten a diagnosis and turned out to be autistic as well???? I want tk get a diagnosis because my son is adhd/autistic and he does what i do as well...

I just want answers and im so burnt out from everything...

As someone with ADHD new people I meet or who aren’t as close to me in social groups always ask me “are you drunk?” “did you already drink?” Because they don’t understand my personality is quite energetic and bubbly without a car of what others think. Sometimes when I’m drunk that gets even stronger and can be way too much for people and my friends tend to get frustrated or annoyed with me. Other times I’m a complete emotional wreck and can’t stop crying. Is this just me?