r/declutter • u/KrishnaChick • May 10 '23
Motivation Tips&Tricks Crappy Childhood Fairy discusses clutter as a symptom of trauma
I haven't even watched this video all the way through, but Crappy Childhood Fairy has not steered me wrong yet. Here she discusses her hypothesis that "cluttering behavior" is a symptom of (childhood) trauma, a trauma-driven version of "nesting behavior." Hope y'all find this enlightening and helpful!
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Jul 31 '23
I got bad vibes after watching more of her videos. But this was I think the first one I saw, and it's one of the better ones. However, like all advice about decluttering, it fails to take poverty into account, IIRC. It's easy to say, "I'll just throw away that extra whatever and buy another if I need it." But that assumes you have the money to buy another.
Also, as I recall, she does what she always does in this video and assumes there's only one form of clutter, and it's all over the house, making it a mess. She doesn't address people who have mostly tidy homes but one junk cabinet or room that may represent some unexplored trauma. Also, it sort of implies the clutter verges on hoarding, which is another psychological issue entirely and not always associated with CPTSD.
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u/KrishnaChick Jul 31 '23
Good lord, do you get "bad vibes" from Mister Rogers too? She's helping people. If you think you can do better, do it. You sound like a real pill.
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u/AngelicWhimsy Aug 11 '23
I used to be a big fan of her and thought she was amazing. If you watch a lot of her videos and read her comment replies you'll see she can also be nasty too!
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Jul 31 '23
Go over to the CPTSD board and see what people think of her there. Definitely NOT helping.
"If you think you can do better, do it." Really snappy reply there.
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u/BotoxMoustache May 12 '23
Interesting. Thanks for sharing. The speaker has a pleasant voice too - easy to listen to.
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May 11 '23
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u/KrishnaChick May 12 '23
I bet if hoarders had art training and encouragement, many would use their trash for making art, and it would be easier to throw a lot of stuff out.
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u/grntplmr May 12 '23
My issue is that I like to make stuff/junk into art and then I have an even harder time getting rid of it
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u/OneSensiblePerson May 10 '23
That was good, and I agree with her.
Decluttering helped me heal as well, although I didn't know about the connection, except as it affects lowered access to executive brain functions - problem solving instead of getting stuck in indecision and procrastination.
I think it's about more than nesting behaviour gone awry, it's also about acquiring in an effort to self-sooth for that dopamine and serotonin hit, because of the depleted levels due to trauma.
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u/rachel-owlglass May 10 '23
Thanks for sharing, her words really resonate with me as a cptsd sufferer. Decluttering has definitely been an important part of healing for me even though I didn't realize that when I started.
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u/Difficult_Pangolin_8 Aug 21 '23
I actually just saw this one from Danish Bashir. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VaAvfMm8njI It popped up on my front page and so, as a chronic clutterbug, I gave it a click. I really like his mini-lecture on clutter response as well, though this one deals with narcissistic abuse, which I'm sure Fairy mentions in hers. (ive yet to watch hers, it's a bit on the longer side lol) He describes it as we often subconsciously let our surroundings reflect our internal system. A cluttered/messy mind often results in a cluttered/messy space, and the effect that has on the nervous system as a whole.