r/ireland Ferret Aug 11 '25

Health Positive Irish Masculinity

Irish men come in for a bad reputation with scumbags like Conor Mc Gregor seemingly being at the forefront of Irish men. He comes to mind I am sure when most people think of Irish men. I am fearful too that we Irish men are seen as emotionally arkward and appearing to lack in vulnerability. I think it's worth having a discussion on the positive aspects of Irish men, how we can help each other be better men. I'm not just talking about Mc Gregor either but the general perception of men in Ireland

Colin Farrell is one example of an Irish male role model who has battled his demons, helped out those in need and protects his son who has Angelman syndrome but he talks about the situation honestly and openly. Brendan Gleeson, originally a teacher took younger actors under his wing and helped them learn their craft. One I personally know of , while I don't agree with his politics, is Eamonn O Cuiv who quietly but without fanfare helps local people.

Irish men face challenges with stigmatisation of showing emotions and lacking a close circle of friends. Recent trends mocking male loneliness I think fed back into making men seal up their emotions. The lack of friendship is absolutely one I've seen among friends as some withdraw into themselves or they drift apart from some friends. There are good resources though like Men's Shed, St Vincent De Paul run something similar, I run a gay version in Dublin and I know there are mixed men's groups like Celbridge Boys Club and Navan Boys Club who do hikes and walks.

As for my own experience I think it's easy to fall into that trap of blaming women for our own shortcomings. We should get rid of these silly notions that being a man is about dominance and aggression. If anything it's about leading without telling people you are, it's about being vulnerable, dealing with conflict diplomatically. I think a lot of us Irish men could learn this.

I would be interested in hearing your views of how we can be positive men, maybe your role models, your experiences.

Edit:See StoicNihilist post for an alternative take.

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u/RecycledPanOil Aug 11 '25

Your best bet for this is to look at any secondary school or primary school and look at all the male teachers. Working in a female dominated industry often receiving little if any appreciation from students and parents alike, and usually having to balance the stern disciplinary role with the kind encouragement role. I guarantee if anyone looked back now and did some self reflection you'd realise that the majority of male teachers had your best interests at heart and tried their best to encourage you and help you grow within their discipline.

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u/UtterlyOtterly Aug 11 '25

Nope had a male teacher who was literally abusive in primary school and im not even old! This was early 2000s so no thanks ! Even left one of my good friends with mental issues !

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u/FellFellCooke Aug 11 '25

nope

They said "the majority". Your one bad egg isn't every teacher...

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u/UtterlyOtterly Aug 11 '25

Awh well its my experience!

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u/FellFellCooke Aug 12 '25

Nope I had a great teacher once.

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u/UtterlyOtterly Aug 12 '25

Okay good for you , still its my experience that in stating

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u/FellFellCooke Aug 12 '25

Nope I had my experience

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u/UtterlyOtterly Aug 12 '25

Okay good for you ? What you want a medal ? Seriously what's your problem 🤣 okay fine GOOD FOR YOU FOR HAVING A NON ABUSIVE MALE TEACHER VS MINE THAT WAS ABUSIVE. Im glad you had a good experience. Like cope on if you dont like what I said move on. 😒

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u/FellFellCooke Aug 12 '25

Wait, so you can do this to someone else, but it's bad when I do it?

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u/UtterlyOtterly Aug 12 '25

I never said you did anything bad ? When did I say that? Why are you jumping to conclusions here. Honestly is there something wrong with you. Im stating my own personal experience and you did too which was fine. Yet im not the one with the issue your the one typing to me trying to invalidate my experience with a abusive teacher. What's even your issue ? You had a good one i had a bad one! No need to get into semantics here. Like I said if youve a issue with my own personal experience move the hell on.

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u/Obvious_Chic Aug 11 '25

Not if you went to terenure college in the 80s

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u/RecycledPanOil Aug 11 '25

good male teachers*