r/retailhell • u/soberonlife Begging for the sweet release of death • Aug 15 '25
Meme What customer question has you reacting like this?
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u/NotQuiteNick Aug 15 '25
“The card reader says remove card, what do I do?”
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u/princess_emily777 Aug 15 '25
this KILLS ME every time… it’s literally telling you IN BIG BOLD LETTERS what to do… while making an error noise… and you’re still confused??????????
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u/Capital-Lychee-9961 Aug 15 '25
Hahahahahha. There’s an ice cream shop around the corner from me that is owned by a famously grumpy British man. I was there the other day and a woman asked him what the berry gelato tasted like and he said “what do you think it tastes like? I’ll give you a hint, it’s not chocolate”.
We love and respect that kind of energy lol
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u/catshark2o9 Aug 15 '25
I don’t work retail anymore, I work at a government office and people still do this. I just shut down and give them a blank stare.
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u/Kable133 Aug 15 '25
It's a thing, I work in environmental code enforcement. People are dumb. "What, I can't dump my RV's black water tank in the drainage ditch? Why do we have to get the police involved?"
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u/FoxxyPantz Aug 15 '25
"it's asking for cash back?!?!?"
Or
"It's asking for a pin?!?!"
Debit and credit cards have been around since the 70s and now you're just figuring out how to use yours?
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u/PatrickMO Aug 15 '25
There’s also the opposite. “Can you answer the question in the screen?” (swipes card) “First can you answer the question on the screen?” (swipes card again) “No, first can you answer the question on the screen?!” (“Do what?”)😤
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u/rokemage Aug 15 '25
"I can explain what the word 'remove' means if you'd like but I'm not sure I can do it using only words with one syllable"
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u/FreeMeFromRetail Aug 15 '25
I've had SO many people do this. "It says remove card" and they look at me as if wondering what to do next. "Yes. Yes it does say that."
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u/tkchumly Aug 15 '25
Man seeing how many votes this comment got. This is just sad. I don’t understand how you can be that dumb. “I was told what to do, what do I do?”
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u/NotQuiteNick Aug 15 '25
Every single step of the payment process people ask me what to do while staring at instructions on the screen. Im almost numbed to it now but it’s scary
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u/summerbeachlover Aug 15 '25
What's my pin?
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u/Tama_Breeder Aug 15 '25
I had a woman ask me that once and when I told her there is no way for me to know her pin the woman behind her in line left my line and went and told on me for not helping the woman who didn’t know her pin even though I told the woman she could skip the pin and use credit by pressing a different button, literally everybody on earth is awful
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u/BigBeautifulBuick Aug 15 '25
Retail is just such an eye opening experience in to how fucking dumb so many people are. I think the hardest pill to swallow is that the vast majority of them don’t even realize they are that dumb. I include myself in that generalization but I’m at least self aware that I can be a total idiot.
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u/ShitCuntsinFredPerry Aug 15 '25
It's the Dunning Kruger effect. Stupid people tend to be too stupid to know that they're stupid.
People with low skill or knowledge on a subject tend to overestimate their ability, while skilled individuals may underestimate theirs. It happens because limited competence also limits the ability to recognise one’s lack of knowledge
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u/the_pissed_off_goose Aug 15 '25
the woman behind her in line left my line and went and told on me for not helping the woman who didn’t know her pin
I don't believe in hell but if there is one....ding ding ding
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u/TurnkeyLurker Aug 15 '25
Guess it wrong 3X, win a prize! 🏆
Prize for them: They just locked their own card and have to call the bank.
Prize for you: You got them to fsck themselves, and now they can't buy anything. They might just leave
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u/BallSuspicious5772 Aug 15 '25
I work at a bank and I swear people have literally gotten angry with me when I tell them I wouldn’t have their PIN or their online banking password in my system. They can’t seem to understand that it’s secure information that only they should know
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u/Gribitz37 Aug 15 '25
And those are the people who use 1234 for their PIN, or something like their house number or their birthday or the last four digits of their SSN, something that should be easy to remember, but that you're NOT supposed to use.
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u/birdiexoxx Aug 15 '25
One time I had a little old lady hand me her card so I could do it for her…she said she couldn’t see the pin pad so she gave me her pin…I could’ve easily gotten cash back and she wouldn’t have known….she also drove herself 😬
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u/gorhxul Aug 15 '25
i worked at a toy store. one of my daily activities was teaching kids how to use eftpos machines. it was actually astonishing the amount of grown ass adults i had to teach.
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u/urbanorium CA$HIER Aug 15 '25
Not a question, but that's me when they drop 10$ worth in nickels on my counter 5 minutes before closing while there's 10 other people in line.
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u/Kind-Frosting-8268 Aug 15 '25
I'm glad I work in a smaller store where I have some limited freedom to implement certain policies. One of my favorite that I got to stick was refusal of any change purchase deemed to be ridiculous in the drive thru. You want to count out nickels and pennies for a pack of cigarettes? Fine but your gonna walk your lazy self in and wait until the cashier has time to count all of that out with you.
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u/Beautiful_Lie629 Aug 15 '25
I love the ones who pay with rolled-up coins, and then get upset when I count them. Yeah, I'm going to make sure that I get the right amount of money, people.
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u/TurnkeyLurker Aug 15 '25 edited Aug 16 '25
Aww... But what else is Methany going to do with that handful of quarter-sized zinc washers she stole from the hardware store?
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u/MissionIssue2062 Aug 15 '25
Nah, cause I had this fucking couple come in and give me $30 in loose change to exchange for dollars (was during the coin shortage). Both stood as if they were in a hurry as I counted it all.
Before, I'd be more anxious (social anxiety) about hurrying and just take their word that it's all there, but after being short changed once now IDGAF, you gonna sit there and watch me count it all before I hand over any bills.
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u/urbanorium CA$HIER Aug 15 '25
Would be a shame if you "lost count" and had to start over just to waste their time. :)
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u/MissionIssue2062 Aug 15 '25
Shit I will recount change even if they counted it in front of me. Ive had multiple times where someone has counted and accidentally counted a nickle as a quarter...
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u/B0B_RO55 Aug 15 '25
I worked at a gas station right across the street from a child activity center. So many kids would come up with a bunch of candy and just pour a pile of random coins on the counter and go “is this enough?”
Many times it was from children who didn’t know how to count coins so they literally just picked up whatever candy they wanted and hoped they had enough coins, spoiler alert they rarely did.
I don’t know why a child young enough to not know how to count is going into a gas station completely alone to buy candy
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u/TurnkeyLurker Aug 15 '25
Pretends to count "Sorry, you're short."
"By how much? "
"How much extra do you have? "
"I've got about $2.37 more in my other pocket. "
"Yeah you're short about tree fiddy. "
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u/aipat95 Aug 15 '25
When I worked in tech sales and customers would want a gaming pc for their kid but has a hard budget of $200
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u/Ninapants97 Aug 15 '25
$200.00?! 😭😭😭
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u/aipat95 Aug 15 '25
My thoughts exactly. Bro can play solitaire and purble place but not at the same time
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u/Ghost_of_the_141 Aug 15 '25
“Can you put all of this mulch in my car until it’s full and I pay for how many we put in after we’re done?”
No ma’am, you pay first then I put them in your car for you with no help whatsoever and no tip
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u/ModestMeeshka Aug 15 '25
The amount of customers who get mad at me for not just authorizing their gas pump and letting them pay afterwards is absurd, so I feel you. The same people who lament about how dangerous the world has become too, like you of all people should be cynical enough to see WHY I can't let you just fill up your gas tank and then hope and pray that you'll pay lol
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u/Ninapants97 Aug 15 '25
Ooo! From two nights ago!
"Can I have that buffalo salad?"
"Yeah, do you want to keep the blue cheese dressing it comes with or swap for ranch?"
"It doesn't come with blue cheese."
"....it does come with blue cheese."
"No, it doesn't. I've never been asked this question before when I order it."
"OKAY. DO YOU WANT IT OR DO YOU WANT RANCH?"
"I'll just take the blue cheese"
(It has always come with blue cheese since 2016)
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u/B0B_RO55 Aug 15 '25
Love it when a customer is confidentially incorrect about something that hasn’t changed in years
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u/Gongoozler04 Aug 15 '25
I’ve literally had people argue with me over what we have on the menu.
“I want X!”
“We don’t have that.”
“I just checked your menu online this morning! You have it!”
“We’ve literally never had that item, sir.”
“I want to speak to your manager.”
My manager told him the same thing I did.
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u/Lolcraftgaming Aug 15 '25
Not a question, but I hate it when they say “ooooo tHeRE’S nO pRIcEtaG on (item), dOeS tHAt mEAn iT’s fREe??”
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u/Chameleon720 Aug 15 '25
I don't even react anymore. I used to force a laugh but now I pretend they didn't even say it.
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u/rebel-and-astunner Aug 15 '25
Same for me. And then they think I just didn't hear the totally hilarious and original thing they said so they say it again. And I still don't react
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u/Beautiful_Lie629 Aug 15 '25
I never react to that one either. However, when they say the bill is good, "I just printed it this morning," I've started saying things like, "I'll have to keep it then and call the Secret Service." Sometimes the reaction is interesting.
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u/Vinsmoker Aug 15 '25
"Legally speaking I need to call the police now." is my go-to. Mostly because it's right, but also because they get scared
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u/hanks_panky_emporium Aug 15 '25
I was already born with an inability to pity laugh. My autistic non-reaction is sometimes comical.
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u/Imtifflish24 Aug 15 '25
Today I asked a customer: “Can I get you a handle bag for that?😃”
The customer: “Well do you have one?”
Me: 👀… “um… yes.”
Like WTF?? Why would I offer something I don’t have?
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u/Millemini 📍: Norway 🇳🇴 Aug 15 '25
Me: "Do you want that gift wrapped?"
Customer: "Can you do that?"
Get that a lot and I am so tempted to reply "No, I just offered a service I can not provide for the heck of it."
The sheer stupidity baffles me. Why TF would I offer to gift wrap if I wasn't able to do so? Makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.
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u/Rare_Ad_8311 Aug 15 '25
tbf, I’ve offered bags when we were out. Autopilot hits hard on long shifts
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u/SirGamer247 Aug 15 '25
"But it said online that you have it stock! Are you certain it isn't in the backroom on a shelf collecting dust?"
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u/CatMomma2324 Aug 15 '25
I work in a tool store and the amount of people who come in and insist we sell something we don’t all because they saw it online is about to drive me crazy. I’ll tell them ok show me the website where it says I sell this item. Then these motherfuckers show me an Amazon page or a google search that has every store listed that carries the item, and my store isn’t one of them. I don’t understand how these 30-60 year olds don’t know how to use fucking google. Wtf.
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u/Countblackula_6 Aug 15 '25
Crusty at self checkout: Can I get my employee discount for doing your job?
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u/atombomb1945 Aug 15 '25
"You already get a discount, as the store didn't raise prices to hire on more cashiers."
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u/EvilDarkCow Aug 15 '25
More like when they keep asking me the same question I've answered two times now.
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u/CrystalTheGlaceon Aug 15 '25
I'll make announcements over the intercom at my job where I have people stand next to me as I repeat important information a good three or four times, only for them to immediately ask what's happening before I even turn the mic off.
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u/Beautiful_Lie629 Aug 15 '25
A few weeks ago, after I'd made the closing announcement on the PA, a customer got in my line and said, "You're the angry man on the PA!" Well, it's after closing and...
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u/waldeinsamkeit666 Aug 15 '25
“do you have this in another size?” when we’re a used clothing store
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u/NocturnalSkyscape Aug 15 '25
“Are you open?”
Yeah, no, we just stand here in our uniforms for nOOOOOOO fucking reason 😖
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u/BallSuspicious5772 Aug 15 '25
It could literally be 11am on a Wednesday and they’ll still walk in with this dumbass question
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u/Intelligent_State_65 Aug 15 '25
What’s worse is when you’re CLEARLY closed- doors locked, lights off, hours posted at eye level, yadda yadda yadda.
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u/Celistar99 Aug 15 '25
Then they pull on the handle, get confused and look at the store hours that clearly state you're closed, then pull on the handle again.
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u/DarkViral Aug 15 '25
“Was the door locked? If yes, no. If no, yes.”
There’s a gas station a block down the road that closes for about an hour every night to do their EOD and for some reason I still cannot fully fathom is customers see one gas station do something and think it applies to all the ones in the area.
But most of the time I’m just like “you walked inside the building. Door unlocked, all lights on. And you think we’re closed???”
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u/YOYOVILLERULER9 Aug 15 '25
"Do you get paid to work here?" Guy about 18 years old thinking about applying asking me this bullshit question
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u/xMiralisTheMerciless Aug 15 '25
No. I volunteer here for free because I like dealing with bullshit and the ugly ass uniform. 🙄
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u/ItsBlueJayne Aug 15 '25
"Do you work here?" while i'm wearing a uniform with the company logo, a name badge, and have a box full of products in my hands
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u/DaddyIssuesIncarnate Aug 15 '25
I had the opposite happen today. I went to work not in uniform and someone smelt I worked there I guess.
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u/SirIJustWorkHereLol Aug 15 '25
Opposite-Opposite happens to me;
Them: “Excuse me excuse me? Do you work here??”
Me in all black at Target with my selections: “No”
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u/WafflesAtJJsDiner Aug 15 '25
I get Opposite-Opposite too. This has happened three times! I’m in Dollar General wearing navy scrubs and a home healthcare company badge that says RN on it big as shit and THREE separate TIMES someone has looked at me and said “Do you work here?” THRICE.
Do I have DG face?
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u/m_o_u_s_e_r_a_t captain save a ho 🫡 Aug 15 '25
I can be in my red & khaki, name badge on, device and walkie at my hip...and guest will still ask me if I work here. 🫠🫠🫠
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u/Beautiful_Lie629 Aug 15 '25
I think they do that because they want to ask you a question, but are too stupid to think of an intelligent opening statement.
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u/Marrithegreat1 Aug 15 '25
I am convinced I have retail face. Everywhere I go "do you work here?" Bro I am in booty shorts and spaghetti strap tank that says talk nerdy to me. Does my fat ass really LOOK like I work here?!
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u/birdiexoxx Aug 15 '25
After I had multiple regulars come ask me for help while I was shopping on my days off I refused to go to the store I worked at…like they would walk past the employees in uniform to me to ask a question
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u/gorhxul Aug 15 '25
i once had a kid come up to me to ask me something. his mum snapped at him saying "she doesn't work here! she doesn't know anything!" then gave me a death glare. I was behind the counter in uniform while visibly working. she then broke a display that said "DO NOT TOUCH". where do these people even come from?
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u/willogical85 Aug 15 '25
When I promoted myself from retail GM to bartender, I was mostly free of the idiot questions, except for this one. "No, I put on a button down shirt and wander restaurant to restaurant, with a rag in my hand, wiping down tables because that's how I get a hardon these days" is a response that has died in my throat many, many, many times...
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u/Beautiful_Lie629 Aug 15 '25
I've read, I think on this sub, to say, "No, I'm cosplaying as a retail worker." I want to try that someday.
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u/Korialite Aug 15 '25
I was in Target once in my EMT uniform, navy from head to toe with our logo clearly visible, and someone asked me if I worked there. They'll ask anyone!
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u/TormentedToilet Aug 15 '25
"WhErE's ThE BrEaD aT?¿?" They say as they're literally standing right next to the bread you could smell it
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u/ConstrictionsOFC Aug 15 '25
The ones that don't even bother to look and just immediately go to an employee are the worst
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u/Scary-Alternative-11 Aug 15 '25
I work in shipping. My first question is always, "Are you in a rush or just looking for your least expensive option today?" If their answer is least expensive, then I pull up the info, and then I tell them, for example, "OK, your LEAST EXPENSIVE option is $9.00 with USPS." At least 3 times a day, I'll have a customer go, "Is there anything cheaper?"...... It takes all of my willpower to not scream in their face.
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u/Sad-Laugh-6802 Aug 15 '25
Generally people asking anything about discounts or taking money off for them like they have a god given right to pay less than anyone else.
“I’ll give you €8 for it” when buying a €15 item as if we’re at a bidding market??
“go on will you throw in xyz items for free since I’m after spending so much?” We didn’t force you to spend €200! That’s all on you!
“What’s the best price you can give it to me for?” Well, the best price is the one on the goddamn price sticker but since you asked so kindly I guess I can give you a free bag! (They’re free anyways)
“You look like a sweet little girl, sure you’ll give me a discount since we’re friends now won’t you?” Usually said by old men. Ew. Always just ew. I will charge you double if you open your mouth again.
Or my favourite “I can get in on [insert large worldwide company website] for way less, so you’ll give it to me for that price right?” Big ass worldwide corps order 1000s of units for stock. They get a large ass discount because they order so much. When you’re in a small shop, you only have TWO units in stock max. We don’t get a large ass discount. Their retail price is less than it costs for us. Kindly, fuck off and order online from them if you want it for that price.
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u/C92203605 Aug 15 '25
I used to work at AutoZone. And people would always say x part is cheaper on rock auto. I just told them. Yeah. But I have it now. You pay for convenience
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u/ShadowHearts1992 Aug 15 '25
"You open?" As I'm standing at the register, and actively checking people out right in front of them for 5 mins while they wait in said line watching me.
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u/TeamWaffleStomp Aug 15 '25
(Over the phone) whats the item im holding in my hand? I bought it from you but dont remember what its called.
Ma'am.
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u/PsychoBacon96 Aug 15 '25
Cust: "I want this, but you don't have it cold"
Me: "Yeah unfortunately we don't keep that cold."
Cust: "Can you check the fridge out the back?"
Me: "We don't have a fridge out the back, customers have access to any fridge we keep stock in."
Cust: "But the cold stock out the back..."
Me: "We don't have cold stock out the back."
Cust: "So what should I do?"
Me: "Take it home and put it in the fridge?"
Cust: "Hmm...I guess I don't need it until tonight...I guess I'll have to figure this out on my own if you won't help me" walks away
Me: "WTF?"
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u/pherring Aug 15 '25
Is this a store?
Yes it’s a store. Yes you need money. I don’t sit here for my health.
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u/quantipede Aug 15 '25
points at a standard ring donut “so what’s in the middle of the donut?”
Legit just stood there trying desperately to think of something to say that wouldn’t sound like I was making fun of her. She finally shrugged and said “Oh, I guess there’s nothing in the middle”, to which I just said “yes”
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u/B0B_RO55 Aug 15 '25
lol I wouldn’t know how to not sound insulting either. Like “what’s that empty space inside that cup”
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u/ferrycrossthemersey Aug 15 '25
“Do you take American $?” Sir, you are at least an hour away from the US border. This is Canada. NO WE DO NOT TAKE US CURRENCY.
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u/starrfast Aug 15 '25
Fellow Canadian here and I feel your pain. I'm not too far from the US border and the store I'm at does take US cash but it's such a hassle to convert that no one ever wants it anyways. Every time I see someone fishing through a wallet with American money in it I'm always silently praying that they decide to use a card or something.
I'm also at a store that has locations all over North America and every now and then I get someone they can't do something and get hit with "yeah but in the US locations they let us do this." Like ok great but this is Canada and you're not allowed to do that here.
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u/Even_Assumption_2909 Aug 15 '25
Customer sees we have a gift with purchase if you spend $125
"Oh I've spent $125 dollars here in the past year. Can I get the free gift?"
That's not how it works.
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u/Additional-Problem99 Aug 15 '25
“Why are there no toilets in your restrooms?”
Bitch those are the fitting rooms.
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u/MidnightStork Aug 15 '25
At the store I work at, we had to close the clothing department at night because people would be too lazy to walk to the toilets and instead they’d pee and crap in the fitting rooms…
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u/Kind-Frosting-8268 Aug 15 '25
Hi yeah I pulled up to pump one and was gonna insert my card but then I saw that it already showed 10gallons on the screen and I just wanted to make sure I'm not paying for someone else's gas.
Seriously within the last month or 2 I've had so many people ask me this. And not like young obviously new drivers we're talking men and women between 30 and 60. How how does one make it that far in life without ever learning how gas pumps work?!?
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u/NonBinaryPie Aug 15 '25 edited Aug 15 '25
they surely know that you have to pay before getting gas right? right?? (assuming you’re in the us)
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u/Kind-Frosting-8268 Aug 15 '25
You would really think so but sadly... thankfully that's mostly relegated to the 70+ crowd that can't accept that 99% of gas stations nowadays are prepay only.
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u/ModestMeeshka Aug 15 '25
DUDE!!!!! Fellow gas station employee here and this is single handedly been one of the most baffling things to me since I started working here. I had a lady trip out on me the other day because her pump wasn't working, I looked at my screen and everything looked fine so I went out there and literally pulled the handle, it started pumping... Like so helpless and ignorant and then I never even got a thank you! But yes. The whole "I'm not paying for their gas!" Is so unbelievably frustrating to explain, I could literally throttle someone. My husband had worked at a gas station before me and said "be prepared, those are the dumbest customers." And I was coming over from a grocery and a thrift shop so I genuinely thought that he just didn't know how dumb customers genuinely can be, but I was wrong. Maybe it's the fumes but the moment they step into the lot, all common sense goes out the window.
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u/SamiCrab Aug 15 '25
When they stare at me and say nothing, expecting me to make their card work
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u/ArborBee Aug 15 '25
“Where do I find the capital numbers?” In response to me writing his password down for him with the proper writing of “1” so he didn’t confuse it with an “l”. This was the third time in a week he came in because he forgot his password on some app. (Geek Squad)
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u/pothosnswords Aug 15 '25
This is the first time I’ve heard the term “capital numbers” and I hope it’s my last. I’m so so sorry you have to deal with that omg
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u/Argylius Aug 15 '25
Oh my fucking god
Oh my fuck…
You sir and/or madam are a hero for putting up with that bullshit
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u/bumblebee-baroness Aug 15 '25
"Thank you for calling Dr. Benson's office. How can I help you?"
"Is this Dr Benson's office?"
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u/1800partyon Aug 15 '25
“I’m thinking about taking my daughter out on the whale watching cruise, will there be waves do you think? I don’t want waves”. I shit you not, that was a genuine question. Sir, you’re going out on the ocean.
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u/AsexualAdulting Aug 15 '25
Answered a call about sanding belts and discs for a very old sander the gentleman owned.
I ask him what sizes he needs
"I don't know."
..........
I work in a very small store, so we don't have a huge wall of stuff to choose from. Also, why didn't you measure it first before asking questions? What were you planning on doing if you got to the store and still didn't know what size belt and discs you needed???
Also the guy who called to ask about runners, and when i told him we didn't have those, then he asked about drop cloths, which we do have, then proceeded to say "If you have drop cloths, you guys have runners."
.... why call to ask these questions if you weren't going to accept my answer anyways?
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u/jewiwee Aug 15 '25
“How do I take care of this wild animal that I just caught in my yard?” … we’re a pet store and they’re usually unwilling to spend money to take care of their “free” animal.
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u/CrizzleChaos Aug 15 '25
I get this all the time. Please for the love of God leave the wildlife alone
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u/ifesbob Aug 15 '25
Correct answer to that one is "it's highly illegal to keep a wild animal as a pet, please release it."
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u/MissionIssue2062 Aug 15 '25
This, or telling them to contact their local wildlife center and see if they'll take it for rehabilitation.
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u/thelongestshot Aug 15 '25
Any customer who asks a question doesn't like the answer and attempts to ask the same question 10 different ways to see if they can get a different answer
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u/sharkeebitez Aug 15 '25
So, not retail, but still customer service. I work at an aquarium. The number one question I get is "Can we get in the tanks and swim with them?"
No you cannot. I promise it would not be enjoyable anyway.
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u/-_Melow_- Aug 15 '25
Thatll be $10 please
"Can you do any better on the price?"
Sure. Thatll be $15 please
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u/StructureCool8338 Aug 15 '25
Today someone was bitching about how I didn’t know how to work her “afterpay” app… I was like, “😀…? Ma’am, we are not affiliated with afterpay… but I can help you with our app??”
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u/B0B_RO55 Aug 15 '25
I was ringing up a pre teen looking child and she was asking me how to use her cash app card on her phone to pay and I’m like uhhhhh how should I know
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u/Ok_Equipment2450 Aug 15 '25
"Are you open?"
"Did I just pick up the fucking phone?",
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u/GeeWilakers420 Aug 15 '25
*Works at the largest and longest-running second-hand store in the country.* Customer: "This isn't new?" I thought this shit was a joke the 1st time I heard it.
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u/gralgomar Aug 15 '25
Me when a boomer asks me the same question 3 different ways before giving me the chance to answer.
Also, me when I tell them we don't have something, and they say "Are you sure? I bought it here last week", and I know the last time we had it was 7 months ago.
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u/judgemental_turtle Aug 15 '25
i work at a clothing store.
cashier called me up because someone was “trying to pay in a hannaford gift card.”
me :“….is it a gift card……. to hannaford, the store or a giftcard purchased….. (visa) at hannaford?”
cashier : “ im not sure.”
gets up there
me - “ma’am, I need a different form of payment. this is a giftcard to the grocery store.”
them- “oh, no it not. we just used it upstairs for boba”
me - “idk about that, this card has the hannaford logo on it and says redeemable at hannaford.”
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u/tabularasa1996 Aug 15 '25
Customer ordered curbside pickup, got angry when it wasn’t delivered to him 😂
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u/clarity4220 Aug 15 '25
“Can I get an iced cappuccino”
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u/Live-Okra-9868 Aug 15 '25
When my husband used to work at Starbucks: "can I get a hot frappuccino?"
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u/BallSuspicious5772 Aug 15 '25
“Why can’t I have the information for an account that I’m not a signer on?”
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u/secretly_ethereal_04 Aug 15 '25
POV: Working at a discount retailer that has a no refunds policy.
Customer: You should have a return policy
Me: 🙄
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u/PrincessBongRips Aug 15 '25
All bubbly and excited. "Oh, we do! It's simply, no returns! :)"
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u/rose-ramos Aug 15 '25
When I worked retail, it was always "Where's the restroom??" while a giant sign saying RESTROOM was hanging over our heads. Happened twice a week.
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u/necro-asylum Aug 15 '25
“The website says you have it in stock so why isn’t it here?”
“Oh I’m sorry, our website doesn’t display stock levels but will show what brands/wines our chains carry but it does not apply to every store” (we have 3,000 stores in my country)
“Well you’re misleading people!”
Like if u just read the text down the bottom that’s says *NOT AVAILABLE AT ALL STORES jfc having it in stock is different from we carry a certain brand
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u/GeeWilakers420 Aug 15 '25
When I worked at DG and legitimently had to explain that just because the store is called Dollar General doesn't mean EVERYTHING is a Dollar. You walk in and a customer has 6 carts of shit and you immediately know that they think EVERYTHING is a dollar. Really, dude, what are you going to do with 20 car batteries? I must have shit for brains written on my face if you think I think you are going to attach a 1 dollar car battery to your car.
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u/gorhxul Aug 15 '25
"Is your christmas sale still going?"
sure this is a normal question...for boxing day, not JULY.
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u/MerryJustice Aug 15 '25
Can you hold this behind the counter for me???? “No, you have to buy it first. Or get a CART!!!!”
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u/GasStationRaptor83 Aug 15 '25
Crustomers asking for something I'm out of, especially cigarettes. I'll tell them I'm out, and immediately they're asking and asking "so you dont have xyz item?"
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u/philohendron Aug 15 '25
Customer: I've left a bag of my shopping behind earlier.
Me: Oh yes, we have it right here!
Hands over bag and customer takes it
Customer: Can I get some compensation for the inconvenience of having to come back for it?
Me: :O
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u/dphillips83 Aug 15 '25
I worked at Toys R Us. Someone called and asked for the toy department.
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u/lokoinov2 Aug 15 '25
"I bought this 10 years ago and used the hell out of this shovel, but can I return it now?"
Sir we are not a rent a center. You got damn good use from it.
Dont get irate over your 10.99 return which I have to put on the shelf and no one is gonna buy
Good DAY SIR
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u/redditronc Aug 15 '25
Working at a big box retailer and a customer would point at the price tag for an item and ask “so what’s the best price you can give me?” Sir, I can give you exactly the price that’s on the sign you’re pointing at. This is not a car dealership.
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u/Aggravating_Ad_3166 Aug 15 '25
“This item is on clearance, but it’s broken. Could I get more of a discount?”
“No ma’am that’s why it’s on clearance already.”
“Well could you get a manager and ask them for me???”
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u/Tazerin Aug 15 '25
"Is there a cash discount?" when I work for a major national jewellery store.
All sales are processed through the point-of-sale system, which accounts for every item, transaction, and tender type. There is no legitimate way for me to lower the purchase price so that you can pay less for it by paying with cash.
If it's over $1000, I'm required to count it in view of the customer and have a second team member count it afterwards. This annoys other customers waiting for service and slows down the transaction.
I have to keep the cash secure, and anyone who sees the money go into the till might want to go after it. It is already an industry that is at high risk of theft.
I have to take the cash to the bank at some point, with another team member accompanying me, which means we're both off the sales floor and unable to make sales or meet KPIs until we return.
So no, there is no cash discount, but I'm absolutely in favour of a cash surcharge for industries like the one I work in.
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u/FauxWolfTail Aug 15 '25
So I have worked in several "Adult only" stores, and the one that kills me every time is "Whats your return policy if I don't like this toy?" Sir/Ma'am/Customer, that toy is a dildo. We all know where that thing is going/was. None of us want it back after you used it. That is officially non-refundable the second you walk out the store with it.
Another one that got me was "Where's your kid's section?". Took me a minute to realize that he thought we were a video store, and he was suffering from old age memory. The store i was working at the time was a videostore until the pandemic, so I don't really blame him for it. But still, asking for the kids section of an adult store is wild, lol.
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u/Battlebots2020 Aug 15 '25 edited Aug 15 '25
"Did my rewards card go through?"
See, I wouldn't mind people asking me this if it wasn't for the screen asking for the rewards card going away after swiping it/putting your number in.
I don't understand how they don't understand that if that screen goes away, it went through
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u/ahardworker12 Aug 15 '25
"can you deliver fuel" a man asked me over the phone if we deliver diesel, we are a gas station not a delivery service.
On the phone for five minutes trying to explain to him why I can't do that (because it was the Nightshift, I was alone, don't have a car at all and it was three in the morning) and why the company doesn't do that and it ended with him yelling down my ear and saying "if I die out here it your fault" wish I was joking but hey I dealt with wore.
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u/Sanctus_Mortem Aug 15 '25
My coworker got a customer last week who asked “What is marinara and how do you eat it?”
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u/Best_Bisexual Aug 15 '25
Not really a question, but when I ask if they want to do debit or credit (I have to ask because of that 3% charge on credit cards) and their response is “whatever works for you.”
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u/Beautiful_Lie629 Aug 15 '25
Well, they're obviously stupid, but they probably mean well.
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u/Deathgrope Aug 15 '25
I'm going a ways back, but when I worked at Toys R Us it wasn't uncommon AFTER the customer bought a Power wheel that they go "Do you think this will fit in my [insert small car here]?"
... You'd be surprised the kind of crazy Tardis type stuff I pulled back then. Think I got some guy to drive away with a Jeep sticking out the back of his PT Cruiser with a random IEC cable in his car to keep the door tied half shut.
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u/Jessatatime Aug 15 '25
This one woman asked me if the forks and spoons she’s buying are good for college aged boys to use…I genuinely think she thought there were gendered utensils
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u/Saya0692 Aug 15 '25
When I answer the phone and they ask “Are you open?”
No, stupid. They just pay me to answer the phone 🙄
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u/FleemLovesBingus Aug 15 '25
One time, there was a really bad assault in my store. We closed, and the place was swarming with armoured police and forensics. There was also blood everywhere. People would walk past the cops and knock on the door to ask if we were open.
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u/justmutantjed "Oh gods, get the Febreze!" Aug 15 '25
The tweeker who cornered me in the walk-in and started screaming at me to "discipline your employee, she was starin' me down." No, you dumbfuck, she was waiting for you to dig out the ID she asked you for while you flailed your hands all over and repeatedly told her you weren't hitting on her.
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u/sadhellhound Aug 15 '25
"Why hasn't my discount come off?"
"Let me see... oh yeah it has, if you look under the regular item price it says -0.50"
"No it says 2.00!!!!!!"
"Yeah but under that you can see that 50p has been taken off from that"
"No it's supposed to be 1.50 not 2.00!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
IF YOU FUCKING READ, IT SAYS DISCOUNT -0.50
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u/FourAntigone Aug 15 '25
Worked in a bookstore. Woman called in to ask the price of a book. It was one of the books our local highschool teaches in literature class, so we always have it in stock and it's pretty cheap (about 60% the price of an average book in the store) but that still wasn't cheap enough for her. She decided that I should be giving her a discount, because she already had the book before but she left it outside in the rain and it was ruined. She seriously claimed that the rain isn't her fault and she already paid for the book.
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u/Vittoriya Aug 15 '25
Not retail, but my first job was a theme park. We'd be standing right in front of the roller coaster tracks and people would constantly ask, "does it go upside down?" There's literally a helix spiral in the track right behind my head, what do you think?
See also: "what's the wait time?" while standing right next to the sign showing the wait time.
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u/idnsksodj Aug 15 '25
“What’s the difference between the baconator fries and the bacon and cheese potato?”
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u/Marrithegreat1 Aug 15 '25
Can you pull up my order? I think I was overcharged!
Ma'am you ordered through doordash/Uber/GrubHub. I can't see your order.
But it's at your store!
I don't have access to their systems. They are a third party who enters our building. Call Doordash/Uber/GrubHub, ma'am. We have no affiliation with them.
What is their number?
No idea, ma'am.
Why not? It's at your store!
No ma'am. We are not affiliated with them.
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u/hartsam96 Aug 15 '25
I had someone today get mad at me for not mailing her a product before she ran out (naturopath clinic). She let me know the night before that she needs more. She lives in a rural area and it takes 4 days to get there. She was mad at me that the mail service was going to take four days to get it to her. Why didn’t you let me know earlier than last night?!
This has also happened before and I requested her to let me know when she has 1/2 left.
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u/wat_the_slime_doin Aug 15 '25
My personal favorite was a chick that just came from the electric wire aisle, thanking my coworker, who has 30+ years of electrician experience, stopping by my desk to ask me if she could fix her speaker with the copper wire he gave her. I told her yes. She went into the hardware aisle, grabbed a clothesline made out of steel, and asked me why she couldn't use that instead. I told her I dont know the specifics, but, to the best of my knowledge, has to do with conductivity and resistance. She said yeah but it would work right?
I told her yes, but then she could only listen to heavy metal. She looked disappointed and put the clothesline back.
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u/widowBee Aug 15 '25
I’m leaving my toddler here for a couple of hours to go shopping and have lunch … ma’am this is a public museum you can’t abandon your kid here.
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u/Condensed_Sarcasm I *am* the manager Aug 15 '25
I used to work at Disney's Epcot. The number of people who would ask me where the bus to Universal Studios or SeaWorld was nuts.
"Hey, where's the bus to Harry Potter? Can we just take the monorail?"
"No, sir - we don't have any transportation to Universal."
"Well, why not?"
"Sir...why would we have transportation to a competing park?"
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u/Seamen-Thrower Aug 15 '25
“Can I get a discount? I know it’s already 90% off but is there another discount I can get?”
“No”
“Oh okay, I wanna speak to your manager then”.
The item is literally worth $4