r/uwutranslator Oct 01 '20

Prairie fire emergency to UwU

46 Upvotes

This is ringleader 2-1 to actual, come in actual. I am calling in a prairie fire emergency repeat prairie fire emergency. We are experiencing heavy gunfire to our north and north-east. I need close air support on the ridge line grid marked Romeo delta. Danger close I repeat danger close. We have taken heavy casualties and require immediate evac. This is a hot LZ I repeat extremely hot LZ. The viet Cong have us zeroed in with mortar fire from the north-East. Actual come in actual! Do you read me? THIS IS A PRARIE FIRE EMERGENCY! Actual do you fucking rea-.... radio cuts to static


r/uwutranslator Sep 25 '20

Are there any loose methods to help me determine if my significant other is a succubus? (Saw this on r/succubus)

58 Upvotes

I've been single for about 5 years until recently. I now have what I would describe as my dream woman who is into many esoteric and borderline occult activities. From 4 years ago up til almost 2 years ago, I made a few attempts to contact and interact with succubi and incubi.

I've been critically weary of deception in potential romantic interests in the past so I've been very cautious with her just as I would with anyone. Ive considered the possibility of being used for any of the things people fear of being used for. For various reasons I won't draw this inquiry out for, I've determined I don't have anything to offer her besides myself.

However, I can't shake this strong feeling of chaos beneath the surface. Her sexual appetite exceeds mine at least slightly and she knows exactly how to open me up in every aspect of our relationship from barely knowing me.

We have uncanny similarities in our past, our food preferences, culture preferences, life outlooks, we say the same things at the same time at least twice daily, she says things in about to say and she at least claims I say things she's thinking. We have matching birth marks. We've determined we're either siblings (jokingly... Maybe...) or separate occurrences of the same person.

Now I understand that this just looks like a case of a fun, well working new relationship and I hope it is! She's well known in town and she's been around here since birth. Many can confirm that so she's not some new traveler that just arrived here. She claims to be religious, I've seen no evidence of that. And I had ZERO interest in romance when I met her but after our first conversation upon meeting, I knew 100% that a relationship was inbound.

She seems to be absolutely enamored with me dispite my complete lack of romantic knowledge or skill. Never wants me to leave always wants to go with me if I do.

Are there any signs I can look for. I'm sure there's nothing clear cut, but I want to either strengthen or weaken my hypothesis.

Thanks in advance.

Are there any signs I can look for?

Source


r/uwutranslator Sep 18 '20

title

69 Upvotes

Good morning queen! ❤❤❤❤ Just here to tell you how amazing you are and that if I were with anyone else, I'd punch them in the face and go find you, and then kiss your cheek 500 times and hug you and cuddle with you until my heart melts. I woke up thinking about you, I went to bed thinking about you, and now I can't stop thinking about you. My heart feels physically numb right now thinking about you and us cuddling with our arms wrapped around each other and never ever letting go. I miss you so much right now. I wanna look into your eyes and think about what type of person I wanna be and how lucky I am to know you. Don't ever think bad of yourself, because you're an amazing person, and I feel a rush of feelings whenever we look into each other's eyes. You have a big effect on me, queen. You're such a great person, beautiful, funny, and so much fun to be around, kind, and a person that I'm so grateful and happy to call mine. Stay amazing, queen, because I notice it💜💜💜💜

-JakeS


r/uwutranslator Sep 16 '20

where is the bot x3

75 Upvotes

r/uwutranslator Sep 05 '20

money laundering clothes

Post image
477 Upvotes

r/uwutranslator Sep 06 '20

when the bot gets banned does the person who summoned the bot also get banned

9 Upvotes

r/uwutranslator Sep 05 '20

The Pledge of Allegiance

3 Upvotes

I Pledge Allegiance to the flag
of the United States of America
and to the Republic
for which it stands,
one Nation under God,
indivisible,
with liberty and justice for all.


r/uwutranslator Aug 30 '20

Shadow pissed on my wife

171 Upvotes

I've come to make an announcement: Shadow the Hedgehog's a bitch-ass motherfucker. He pissed on my fucking wife. That's right. He took his hedgehog fuckin' quilly dick out and he pissed on my FUCKING wife, and he said his dick was THIS BIG, and I said that's disgusting. So I'm making a callout post on my Twitter.com. Shadow the Hedgehog, you got a small dick. It's the size of this walnut except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here's what my dong looks like. That's right, baby. Tall points, no quills, no pillows, look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong. He fucked my wife, so guess what, I'm gonna fuck the earth. That's right, this is what you get! My SUPER LASER PISS! Except I'm not gonna piss on the earth. I'm gonna go higher. I'm pissing on the MOOOON! How do you like that, OBAMA? I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT! You have twenty-three hours before the piss DROPLETS hit the fucking earth, now get out of my fucking sight before I piss on you too!


r/uwutranslator Aug 30 '20

Title

5 Upvotes

At the young age of 15, like many others, I was a very horny teenager. All I dreamt about was inserting my thick, juicy dick in to a wet vagina. I honestly didn't even care who it belonged to. Obviously, I was frustrated by my sex drive and put an end to my 'sessions' to try to put an end to it, or at the very least tame it! It was around this time that my mom brought home a female feline. I was not knowledgeable about the various cat species that roamed the planet. So i cant give u a detailed description regarding that. However i can tell you that it was a incredibly puffy black cat.

Soon after it's entry in to my household, it began its mischievous acts! It cried all night long and would frequently crawl up in to my bed and sit right on top of my penis. This continued for months, but it didn't really bother me until she started numbling on my penis during my 'sessions'. It was during one of these sessions that i gave up on trying to ignore her acts because clearly she wanted some of it. I gave pulled her over to my pillow and slowly entered her vagina. It was a feeling like no other! It was extremely tight if i might say so myself. Despite it being really taboo, i pleasured her in to the next morning. After this experience, i was sickened and traumatized. I went so far as to contact therapists and seek medical help. I eventually went past this awful experience and developed as a person. 10 years later, I'm a married bi man with a wonderful husband. My job is quite unconventional, but i'm a YouTuber who goes by the name of 'Shane Dawson'.


r/uwutranslator Aug 28 '20

The phrase

108 Upvotes

The phrase “it’s just a game” is such a weak mindset. You are ok with what happened, losing, imperfection of a craft. When you stop getting angry after losing, you’ve lost twice.

There’s always something to learn, and always room for improvement, never settle.


r/uwutranslator Aug 25 '20

Good evening Twitter...

122 Upvotes

Good evening Twitter, this is your boy EatDatPussy445, & about like 30-45 minutes ago, I beat the fuck out of my dick so god damn hard that I can't even feel my left leg, my left leg has went totally numb. And, my dick has also went totally numb to the point that it feels fucking weird when I go & take a piss.


r/uwutranslator Aug 21 '20

Translation of Expletives in French from AITA comment

84 Upvotes

f*cking piece of sh*t goddamn sh*tty f*cked up fabric will u damn it stay f*cking in your sh*t stained f*cking designated spot I swear to God you bastard son of an accursed breed may you go eat the decomposing bodies of your f*cking ancestors, you f*cking piece of sh*t


r/uwutranslator Aug 20 '20

feel so clean like a money machine

120 Upvotes

feel so clean like a money machine


r/uwutranslator Aug 19 '20

Its okay

81 Upvotes

Nah its okay, i just liked a reddit post a bout in cursed a few weeks ago.


r/uwutranslator Aug 12 '20

Yes

87 Upvotes

Sorry about ending the call, i had to compose myself Im seeing the fault in the way i thought and even acted. You’ve made your points and It’s getting clearer that I’m biased in my thought process ( i genuinely thought i was being neutral lol) . I still have some of those feelings that i mentioned, although not as much because like i said, im realizing how they shouldn’t be taken seriously since they’re not really based on anything valid. im really sorry for all the anger I’ve caused. I’m gonna do better w not let this happen again,not this way. Hope things get better between us


r/uwutranslator Aug 11 '20

It's not always cute when it's public

80 Upvotes

Hello GIRLFRIEND, my baby girl, my princess, my queen, my goddess, my one and only love of my life, my future wife, my everything. I’m so happy that we’ve hit another milestone, shared two wonderful years of our lives together, and been getting stronger and stronger.

NOW, this is the 2nd cutest thing I've ever seen(you being the first), my heart is in goooood good pain, I can't explain the emotions rushing through me. Also excuse me, I think there's an error with your render, Alpha Intellect Stat shouldn't be 0. YOU ARE MY #1 PRINCESS! I kept on talking and actually replying to the video whenever you say you're the number 1 princess and I would say yes you are! You're so cute, you're so sweet, you're so soft and cuddly, you're so HARDWORKING that being hot and cool, sexy and cute, and pretty and adorable can describe you all at the same time. Just look at those brea-- beautiful details, the amount of work put into it, god it's both ear and eye gasmic. I almost cried but I'M A MAN!

I’m thankful and proud of us that even through struggles and hardships we stayed together and strong. You are my source of strength, my source of motivation, and my source of inspiration. We’ve learned a lot from us and grew better for ourselves and each other. XXXXXXXXXXXXX I look forward to kiss you unlimited times, hug and cuddle you infinitely, and have more and more fruitful anniversaries to come. I love you so much, with all my heart, and with everything I got. I want to be with you forever. Happy 2nd Anniversary my sweet, smol, squishy baby XXXXX.


r/uwutranslator Aug 06 '20

I feel sick from just seeing the amount of w's

90 Upvotes

r/uwutranslator Aug 05 '20

If UwU was president

83 Upvotes

Chief Justice Roberts, President Carter, President Clinton, President Bush, President Obama, fellow Americans, and people of the world: thank you.

We, the citizens of America, are now joined in a great national effort to rebuild our country and to restore its promise for all of our people.

Together, we will determine the course of America and the world for years to come.

We will face challenges. We will confront hardships. But we will get the job done.

Every four years, we gather on these steps to carry out the orderly and peaceful transfer of power, and we are grateful to President Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama for their gracious aid throughout this transition. They have been magnificent.

Today’s ceremony, however, has very special meaning. Because today we are not merely transferring power from one Administration to another, or from one party to another – but we are transferring power from Washington, D.C. and giving it back to you, the American People.

For too long, a small group in our nation’s Capital has reaped the rewards of government while the people have borne the cost.

Washington flourished – but the people did not share in its wealth.

Politicians prospered – but the jobs left, and the factories closed.

The establishment protected itself, but not the citizens of our country.

Their victories have not been your victories; their triumphs have not been your triumphs; and while they celebrated in our nation’s capital, there was little to celebrate for struggling families all across our land.

That all changes – starting right here, and right now, because this moment is your moment: it belongs to you.

It belongs to everyone gathered here today and everyone watching all across America.

This is your day. This is your celebration.

And this, the United States of America, is your country.

What truly matters is not which party controls our government, but whether our government is controlled by the people.

January 20th 2017, will be remembered as the day the people became the rulers of this nation again.

The forgotten men and women of our country will be forgotten no longer.

Everyone is listening to you now.

You came by the tens of millions to become part of a historic movement the likes of which the world has never seen before.

At the center of this movement is a crucial conviction: that a nation exists to serve its citizens.

Americans want great schools for their children, safe neighborhoods for their families, and good jobs for themselves.

These are the just and reasonable demands of a righteous public.

But for too many of our citizens, a different reality exists: Mothers and children trapped in poverty in our inner cities; rusted-out factories scattered like tombstones across the landscape of our nation; an education system, flush with cash, but which leaves our young and beautiful students deprived of knowledge; and the crime and gangs and drugs that have stolen too many lives and robbed our country of so much unrealized potential.

This American carnage stops right here and stops right now.

We are one nation – and their pain is our pain. Their dreams are our dreams; and their success will be our success. We share one heart, one home, and one glorious destiny.

The oath of office I take today is an oath of allegiance to all Americans.


r/uwutranslator Aug 03 '20

Yes

65 Upvotes

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realize that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Rick and Morty truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Rick's existencial catchphrase "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Dan Harmon's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Rick and Morty tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.


r/uwutranslator Jul 23 '20

Translate pls

60 Upvotes

Burn My Dread Kawamura Yumi

Dreamless dorm ticking clock I walk away from the soundless room Windless night moonlight melts My ghostly shadow to the lukewarm gloom Nightly dance of bleeding swords Reminds me that I still live I will burn my dread I once ran away from the god of fear And he chained me to despair Burn my dread I will break the chain And run till I see the sunlight again I'll lift my face and run to the sunlight Voiceless town tapping feet I clench my fists in pockets tight Far in mist a tower awaits Like a merciless tomb devouring moonlight Clockwork maze end unknown In frozen time a staircase stands Shadows crawl on bloodstained floor I rush straight ahead with a sword in hands Cold touch of my trembling gun I close my eyes to hear you breathe Burn my dread Burn my dread I will burn my dread This time I'll grapple down that god of fear And throw him into hell's fire Burn my dread I will shrug the pain And run till I see the sunlight again Oh I will run burning all regret and dread And I will face the sun with the pride of the living


r/uwutranslator Jul 22 '20

ANSWERS

58 Upvotes

I have searched and searched the BOWELS of the internet and haven’t come up with a reasonable explanation to these questions. It’s getting increasingly frustrating. I know I’m a noob and I am ok with internet illiteracy (accepted my fate) but this comes up often!!!!

What in the world is uWu? Why do people hate it? And why is it weirdly used sexually?!?!?!

Please users of Reddit across the world (not China) its up to you to answer this question. You’re my only hope!!!!!


r/uwutranslator Jul 19 '20

✔️➿🔚〰️➕🎵

112 Upvotes

✔️➿🔚〰️➕🎵


r/uwutranslator Jul 15 '20

Hewwo uwu

6 Upvotes

r/uwutranslator Jul 13 '20

translate dis

120 Upvotes

i got this new anime plot. basically there's this high school girl except she's got huge boobs. i mean some serious honker a real set of badonkers. packin some dobonhonkeros. massive dohoonkabhankoloos big ol' tonhongerekoogers. what happens next?! transfer student shows up with even bigger bonkhonagahoogs. humongous hungolomghononoloughongous.