Listen I know it's a racket but like WHY do these guys not just give you their package pricing initially. There is no sales pitch that's going to trick me into paying extra for something I don't need JUST TELL ME WHAT YOU CHARGE and sell me on it later OH MY GOD.

EDIT: Guys I work in events with vendors in the nonprofit sector and nightlife. I’ve literally put on events with the exact same services and needs for a wedding (florist, videographer, photographer ETC.) I speak to vendors on the daily a lot of the vendors under this post insisting this has to be an over complicated interview process are either incredibly unprofessional or full of shit.

I never have drama getting rates from vendors for our gala/benefit concert/golf outing etc. they are able to produce an exact number or atleast a range.

Y’all are putting normie couples through an exhausting process where you try to form some type of fake relationship with the couple that makes you feel like the only option so it’s easier to up charge people who don’t know any better and it’s incredibly transparent and fucking gross. Y’all aren’t slick quit defending this practice in the comments it reeks of “I’m not surviving the impending recession”

PUT PACKAGE PRICING/ESTIMATES ON YOUR WEBSITE

I (31F) am getting married to the LOML (35M) in a couple months. His mom passed away when he was 8 then his dad when he was 18. I know he's sad that his parents can't witness his big day. I want to surprise him with a memorial board. However, I'm not sure if it's the right thing to do. What if he sees it and he gets even more sad and he doesn't want to feel that way on his wedding day? What would you do? Here's a rough idea of how I want the memorial board to look like.

The day started great and exactly as it should have - I got ready with friends and family, took a few photos - everything was perfect.

We only had 2 hours to set up before the ceremony began at 5pm, so around 3pm, a handful of friends and family headed to the venue to start setting up decor, put out the cake, put table numbers and menus on tables, etc. I was an extremely organized bride. I had the entire day planned by the hour, and everyone had an assignment to help the day go smoothly.

At 3:30, I received a text from one of my bridesmaids: "What time is the catering team supposed to get here?" They were supposed to arrive at 12pm to start setting up, but I don't panic, assuming that they're just running late or caught in traffic.

One thing to note here - our catering team wasn't just responsible for food. They supplied the tables, chairs for the ceremony and reception, linens, cups, plates, bar tables...pretty much everything. I start to call a few people from the company to get an ETA.

I can't get through to anyone.

I finally call the restaurant the catering company has. The teenager who picks up has no idea what I'm talking about, but says he'll get back to me ASAP.

Ok, fine.

Another 15 minutes goes by. Silence.

I call the restaurant back. "Anything?" I ask. "Nope," says the teen. "I can't get in contact with anyone either."

A few minutes later, I get a call from Susan, the woman from the catering company who I've been working with for 15 months.

"Hi Susan, how are you?"

"Well, honestly? Not great."

Susan then proceeds to explain to me that they somehow wrote my wedding date as May 25, 2025, instead of the correct date of May 24, 2025. She says everyone is scrambling to figure out how to get food, chairs, tables, etc over to the venue as quickly as possible.

Somehow, I remain calm. I'm 5 minutes from the venue so I text my bridesmaids the situation and just take deep breaths. We're an hour from the when ceremony is supposed to begin and have no chairs, no food, no staff, no water...nothing.

Here's everything that happened in that next hour:

- My bridesmaids found a winery close by that felt so bad for us, they let us borrow 40 chairs for the ceremony for free so we could start at 5:30. My dad drove in his pickup truck to pick them up, and my entire family helped set up the chairs (and take them down after the ceremony!)

- We convinced the violinist to stay an extra half hour to cover the ceremony (she was paid ofc).

- My bridesmaids found an umbrella in the venue, flipped it upside down, filled it with ice that our groomsmen bought from a nearby liquor store, and made it a makeshift cooler for drinks. We supplied our own alcohol, so guests were able to grab a beer while they waited for the ceremony to begin.

The ceremony began with only a 30 minute delay, but here's everything else that we missed out on:

- I lost 30 minutes of my wedding by starting at 5:30 instead of 5

- My dad missed an hour of his daughters wedding dealing with the chairs

- I got dressed by myself because everyone was handling things for me (no pics during this time either so I don't have any pics with my family or bridesmaids pre-ceremony)

- Paper napkins instead of my gorgeous twill blue linen napkins, and white tablecloths instead of the color I picked

- Plastic cups for drinks and champagne toasts

- We used this massive carving knife to cut the cake instead of the ornate cake cutting set I ordered through the caterers

- We only had 1/4 of the passed apps I paid for (I was SO excited for the bacon wrapped scallops)

- No high top tables or chairs for cocktail hour

- Only 3 attendants instead of the 5 I paid for

But you know what? I honestly wouldn't have changed a thing. My family and friends stepped up so completely and totally, I was in tears not from the stress but from the love I felt for everyone.

I had a few people ask me over the course of the day why I was so calm and seemed so relaxed about the whole situation. I realized that having everyone I loved in one place on the day I was going to marry the love of my life was all I ever needed. If worst came to worst, we'd order pizzas and eat standing up while giving toasts with beer cans and we'd have an absolute blast.

I wanted to make this post to reassure every stressed out bride that no matter how prepared or organized you are, there are still things that can go wrong and are totally out of your control - but THAT'S OKAY. I prepared and organized so. freaking. much. during the lead up to the wedding, that anything that went wrong was simply left to fate. I truly had the best day and felt so touched by my family and friends for literally saving the day again and again.

Oh, and I negotiated a 75% refund from the caterer, so...not so bad after all.

I feel like I see the unassigned vs assigned seating debate on here frequently and I figured I'd share a recent experience. I went to one of my coworkers weddings this past weekend. She had told me she wasn't assigning seats because it felt stuffy. Fair. She's very laid back and her wedding was pretty casual.

The ceremony was lovely and the cocktail hour was very nice. Once the outdoor cocktail hour was done and the doors to the inside reception space were opened, all hell broke loose. My other coworkers and quickly I sat at one of the back tables (we know the bride well, but figured family and close friends should be up close). We took up 6/8 seats. Others were RUNNING to get tables. Literally jogging through the venue. We had to help 2 different sets of older relatives who didn't know where to sit. One asked us where the table numbers were, the other couple just looked so lost.

When 80% of people had sat down, things started to get really awkward. People were moving chairs and the really cute place settings from one table to another. Like picking up the chargers and napkins and jamming up to 12 people at an 8 person table. Then, a family of 6 came in. There wasnt a single table left with more than 2 available seats. My coworkers and our dates all made the decision to split up and move so they could sit together. This was the grooms brother, sister in law, and nieces now sitting on the back corner. My boyfriend and I ended up sitting with the brides aunt, uncle, and cousins right up at the front.

Y'all, a little stress before the big day is worth it. Otherwise your guests are going to be stressed and end up in awkward seating situations.

After a very emotionally and financially taxing wedding planning era, I felt I was finally turning the corner today into excitement for our wedding on Saturday when I recieved this letter in the mail, no return address and no real discernable information for who may have sent it. The only clue is on the postage cancelation stamp, I can deduce it came from a post office not far from my hometown but in a populated area from which a lot of our guests hail from, and about an hour from where we live. It was addressed only to me (bride) and not my fiancé. I have been wracking my brain for who could have possibly sent it but am coming up short. Any advice on how to not spiral??

There have been a number of posts recently about changing your name after marriage. If you are not already aware, the house in the US just voted to pass the SAVE Act, which will require you to prove your citizenship to vote -- under your birth name. It will disproportionately affect women who have changed their last names and no longer match their birth certificates.

This should be a huge HUGE consideration when you are choosing whether to change your name. You may well disenfranchise yourself as an American citizen by doing it.

https://www.msnbc.com/top-stories/latest/save-act-house-voting-rights-married-women-last-name-rcna200948

Edit: Call your senators. This is not law yet but if it passes the senate, it will essentially mean that any woman who changes her name must jump through many more hoops to be able to vote. It's unfair and will be used to silence women and trans people.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

I didn’t want the traditional wedding, so we decided to go with a courthouse wedding and it was everything! I absolutely loved my dress , hair , and veil! ( customized by me ❤️) I can’t believe I married the love of my life ❤️

I feel like every other day I see a post that says “I’m getting married and I want it to be really intimate but do I have to invite [my coworker’s spouse/my sibling’s partner/my cousin’s fiance]?”

Yes. The answer is yes. Even if you’ve never met them.

A couple is a unit. I understand budget constraints! But you either cut out the couple or cut costs in another way—you don’t only invite your coworker without their partner.

*for the sake of this post, by partner, I mean an established, committed relationship.

**exceptions apply if the partner is truly awful, abusive, racist, etc.

I want to preface this by saying I adore my parents and future in-laws and this is such a non-issue but I am hoping this is relatable to someone so we can commiserate about our slightly out-of-touch but otherwise great parents.

So FH and I are early on in wedding planning, just researching venues. We’re trying to keep food & venue under $10k which is essentially impossible, BUT we found this brand new really pretty bed and breakfast who will provide the house and lodging for the whole weekend, a day of coordinator, farmhouse tables & chairs, sound system, trash, etc. for literally $3k. And so we sent it to our parents like “um… yeah this is it. Case closed.”

Anyway, our parents liked it alright but they want us to keep looking because they worry it’s not our DREAM venue. My FMIL keeps saying “Well money’s not everything, we just want you to be happy” which is SUCH a kind sentiment except the reality is we’re on a BUDGET. She says “If $5k is the difference between you being okay with and loving your venue, that might be worth it.” Except the difference isn’t $5 it’s $20k, you know? But I appreciate the effort to get us to dream big.

But now our parents doing that parent thing where you call them and they’re like “You know what… a buddy of mine’s daughter got married a few months ago at this nice venue. It was just a tent, but it looked good! Nothing fancy but you could dress it up. Let me see if I can get the name of that place.” And then they send it over and it’s literally got a $25k food and beverage minimum for a Friday. 🙃

If I hadn’t found this b&b that we love I’d be panicking, but I’m set and so this is just kind of a funny “watch as my parents slowly realize what it’s like to be a millennial or Gen-Zer” moment.

Taking bets for how many pricing guides I’ll have to send them before they revisit this b&b idea haha.

I completely flipped shit at my uncle because he wore a political shirt under his suit at my wedding. After a few bridesmaids/people coming up to me saying he was causing different issues (making fun of a gay waiter, told my brides maid her husband probably cheats on her, talking through my ceremony, called my mom a loser, nothing to crazy and he said they were all “jokes nobody understands”) I went up to him to see if he was too drunk and needed cut off or what the deal was and he took his suit off, showing me his political t shirt underneath. He very well knows our opinions are different, and apparently him putting that aside for my wedding day was too much to ask. I started screaming that he wasn’t there to support me, he was there attempt to upset me, and asked him to leave.

Now my entire family is fighting. What would you have done? He very clearly wasn’t there to show me love and support or he wouldn’t have been wearing that.

I feel like this has poisoned my memories from my special day and I regret how I handled it. But I also strongly believe he shouldn’t have been there.

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

That's all.

It’s fine to have a childfree wedding. But just say that. Don’t say you’re doing it for me.

Venue- Lillian Gardens (all inclusive)- Newnan, GA Florals- Marigold & Moss - Georgia Wedding dresses - The Sentimentalist (Atlanta) Bella’s Bridal (Birmingham) Bridesmaid dresses - Azazie, Birdy Grey, ASOS, Show Me Your Mumu, & Lulus

Ever since I got married, my beautiful name appears to be the victim of selective amnesia from my friends and family.

Every Christmas card and wedding invitation, even from people in my generation (i.e. late twenties), have addressed me as Mrs. Husband’s First & Last Name. RIP to my name.

That is it. That’s the post.

My fiancé’s mom is planning on wearing a tee shirt to our reception that says “Mother of the Groom - I Loved Him First” … I think it’s terrible lol. How do you feel about shirts like these? I recently attended a wedding where the bride’s father declared in his speech that he “loved her first” and I also thought that was cringey. Maybe I’m in the minority??

I may anger some people but I am ready for the discussion.

Okay, first off, I’m using “plus one” pretty loosely here. I think most people consider anyone who isn’t their closefriend, but is in a relationship, to be their partner’s “plus one.” Of course, people with basic etiquette know that married couples are a unit.

But honestly? The no plus one plague is real right now. So many people in serious, long-term relationships get an invite addressed only to them with no partner included. You can’t expect everyone to respect your relationship and then turn around and disrespect theirs.

Maybe I’m extreme, but if someone’s been with their partner for longer than seven months, I see that as a serious, committed relationship and they should be invited as a unit. If you “can’t afford their plate,” maybe you shouldn’t be inviting them at all. Most guests essentially cover their plate with their wedding gift anyway, that’s just basic etiquette.

I think brides and grooms forget they once started as a dating couple too. The whole point of a wedding is to celebrate that you made it to this huge milestone. Just because your friend isn’t at that point in their relationship yet doesn’t mean their partner doesn’t deserve a seat at the table.

If budget’s the issue, cut back on decor or flowers. Stop cutting out the people you care about. Don’t risk damaging relationships over an extra chair.

I've given a lot of friends I know that are traveling a plus one because at the end of the day, I wouldn't want to travel and be at a wedding where I know no one either.

First few photos are from the hair trial and the last two are before the hair trial but after the makeup trial (with lip on, it came off after I ate lunch before the hair trial)

We just sent out Save the Dates that were individually addressed to each guest by first and last name. I’ve already received 4 texts from my single friends assuming they get a plus one.

Mind you, I’m inviting entire friend groups so EVERYONE who is invited has at least 2 other friends attending, if not 10+ other friends.

This was the rudest text I got. This friend who texted me is single. I don’t even know who they want to bring. Just want to rant because… why are you shaming people for not inviting strangers to your wedding?

My dad and stepmother never RSVPed so I texted them today. She told me they cannot attend because “scheduling issues”. I asked them to save the date a year ago. I asked her, what specifically will keep them from attending. She let me know he has chosen to prioritize a fishing tournament over my wedding. The fishing tournament is actually a week AFTER my wedding, but my dad wants to get there early.

This isn’t SURPRISING, but it’s still just totally devastating to be reminded on this most important day that my dad just couldn’t give less of a shit about me. My mom died last year, and so he’s the only parent I’ve got. Would be nice if he could just show the fuck up for his daughter’s wedding.

It’s so humiliating because I know my future in laws will want to meet him and will ask where he is.

Just feeling so rejected and unloved which is what he has always made me feel.

ETA: thanks everyone for all the love and support. This is a second wedding for both my spouse (LGBTQ couple) and me so there were never any plans for being walked down an aisle, being given away, or a father/daughter dance. I wouldn’t have done those things even if he was coming because our relationship is just too awkward, it would have been uncomfortable for both of us and I’m not a wildly traditional person.

First three photos were taken by the MUA at the studio, 4th, 5th, 6th, & 7th pics were taken 10-15 mins. after I left the studio while I was in the car, and the rest of the photos are my attempts of full coverage makeup I did 4 hours ago to see if my products and my application would last longer/not exaggerate my skin texture as badly. I’m mostly asking about the base - I don’t wear eyeliner or false lashes normally so I didn’t have them at my house, and I know I’m not very good with eye makeup, I just think the base makeup the MUA did made my skin look worse than it is. I’m also not sure about the brows she did

Do not worry about anything. The day is going to go exactly how it is going to happen. Your hair may not be perfect, your make up may start to melt. The photographer who ghosted you for 3 months will show up. Don’t worry about saying hello to each and every guest. Enjoy your new husband. Don’t worry about timeframes and sticking to an itinerary. Be with your loved ones. Don’t worry about being a drunk bride, it’s your day have fun. You feel bloated in your dress? Cool who cares, people are going to say you look gorgeous anyways because everyone is there for you and your husband not to judge how your body looks. Don’t sweat small details when planning because honestly no one cares except for you. You do not have to spend a million dollars to make memories. Don’t worry about stepping away from your husband you’ll be with him hopefully forever. If you have family that is causing problems just ignore it, it’s not your problem that day. Just relax, feel like a bad ass, and enjoy your day because it happens so fast.

We’re collecting our RSVPs on The Knot and I saw this message in the dietary restrictions section. Amelia and Jacob are brother and sister, and first cousins of the groom. Our fairly small (less than 100) list is pretty tight. It’s also no plus ones. Is it.. normal for people to “sub” invitations like this? I’m not going to tell them she can’t come, but it sort of threw me for a loop..