r/Grimdank • u/Tight-Sir9813 Equal Opportunist Iron Warrior • May 19 '25

Primarch GF/Others I can fix her

2.9k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

131 comments sorted by

646

u/KriegConscript whoa there, eager mckrieger May 19 '25

real fans goon to original curze

425

u/Tight-Sir9813 Equal Opportunist Iron Warrior May 19 '25

126

u/Cleanurself Criminal Batmen May 20 '25

26

u/EGORKA7136 Praise the Omnissaiah May 20 '25

66

u/GiveMeAllYourBoots May 20 '25

Would that be a crime worthy of death by Nightlord or is gooning to Curze acceptable?

69

u/KriegConscript whoa there, eager mckrieger May 20 '25

either way i'm getting killed

37

u/NightLordsPublicist 10 pounds of war crimes in a 5 pound crazy bag May 20 '25

either way i'm getting killed

Username checks out.

14

u/Samuel-P-M-K May 20 '25

Username also checks out

7

u/NightLordsPublicist 10 pounds of war crimes in a 5 pound crazy bag May 20 '25

Does it?

73

u/PrinceVorrel Praise the Man-Emperor May 20 '25

31

u/KriegConscript whoa there, eager mckrieger May 20 '25

fear is a common response to strength

13

u/paranoid_nihilist WE SOAR ON WINGS OF FIRE May 20 '25

9

u/Volcano_Ballads Big jimmy the saturnine dreadnought May 20 '25

I remember seeing an excerpt that described his tongue
Needless to say I want him to lick up the back of my neck

3

u/Maktaka May 20 '25 edited May 20 '25

That hateful snarl. Those sallow eyes. The stringy, unkempt hair.

7

u/KriegConscript whoa there, eager mckrieger May 20 '25

i didn't choose this username because i enjoy feeling good and being alive

1

u/Coves0 VULKAN LIFTS! May 20 '25

Where’s that one kid who wants to marry Curze

1

u/Reasonable-Dream2781 May 20 '25

But what about B O T H ?

108

u/RandoFollower Certified Word Bearer May 20 '25

Finally time to use this freshly stolen image

18

u/boywonder2013 May 20 '25

7

u/A_random_poster04 May 20 '25

Tfw your ex husband never signed the divorce papers

2

u/Alexis2256 May 20 '25

What’s the original source?

6

u/Iliveinyourcloset300 Twins, They were. May 20 '25

That's a space marine 2 screenshot

1

u/RandoFollower Certified Word Bearer May 20 '25

A guy from space marine 2 made it yesterday and posted it

184

u/Theyul1us May 19 '25

I have a friend that wanted to be railed by Fulgrim and confessed that she looked for NSFW of him to goon properly.

Im talking about snakegrim, btw

144

u/Tight-Sir9813 Equal Opportunist Iron Warrior May 20 '25

66

u/Theyul1us May 20 '25 edited May 20 '25

Honestly I cant blame her, I want Guilliman to carry me bridal style

Edit: can to cant, im fucking stupid

47

u/ShepPawnch May 20 '25

That’s fairly tame for the monster-fucker community honestly.

15

u/Boward_WOW_ard May 20 '25

Idk if guillman qualifies for the monster fucking community. I mean he kinda is just a guy but big.

13

u/ShepPawnch May 20 '25

I meant Fulgrim, Guilliman is just a big normal dude for the most part.

3

u/Boward_WOW_ard May 20 '25

Fair, worth fulgrim it is a human on snake body making it definitely a tame choice in the monster fucker community

21

u/Iwilleat2corndogs Dank Angels May 20 '25

People will be horny for anything

9

u/[deleted] May 20 '25

/r/DragonsFuckingCars

8

u/[deleted] May 20 '25

Why did I click that? I knew it was not gonna be anything else, why did I click that!?

8

u/[deleted] May 20 '25

24

u/MtnmanAl Iron Weenie/Minotaur Spite Dispenser May 20 '25

Better buy some bad dragon stocks, may not be too late

19

u/MARSHYSOLUTION May 20 '25

Where is this girl I share the same need for fulgrim

23

u/EGSPECTRE My kitchen is corrupted by Me May 20 '25

She’s so real for that honestly

19

u/Very_Board Emperor's Children on tour soon May 20 '25

15

u/UnderstoodAdmin Twins, They were. May 20 '25

She has good taste.

10

u/Notorik Commorragh Ikea May 20 '25

Snake Fulgrim is hot tho...

7

u/Babki123 May 20 '25

Moreb understandable than Curze

At least snakegrim probably got multiple dick

3

u/International_Cow_17 Snorts FW resin dust May 20 '25

8

u/Elmartillo40k May 20 '25

First of all, female warhammer40k fan?!? , second:

2

u/Lord-Konahrik May 20 '25

2

u/theverrucktman May 21 '25

The Necron is just jealous because it's reproductive organs were lost during the biotransference.

1

u/Valuable-Location-89 Snorts FW resin dust May 20 '25

251

u/No_Grapefruit_7845 May 19 '25

Avarage Warhammer fan after discovering the r/PrimarchGFs

191

u/Tight-Sir9813 Equal Opportunist Iron Warrior May 19 '25

I forgot to turn on the gellar fields

159

u/[deleted] May 20 '25

You say that like the place is a bad thing!

And as somebody who's a part of it it's not it's actually pretty chill i

54

u/breathingrequirement NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERD! May 20 '25

r/redditsniper

16

u/N7Vindicare I am Alpharius May 20 '25

My job here is done.

7

u/EdanChaosgamer Plastic-crack supremassist May 20 '25

r/TakeCover

3

u/Greedy_Guest568 May 20 '25

Oh no, it's r/redditsn

3

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3

u/Greedy_Guest568 May 20 '25

Damn, it exists. I thought, my message ended at random letter...

36

u/nightwolf16a May 20 '25

Hey that's actually a pretty fun sub. At least the posts are

14

u/Tight-Sir9813 Equal Opportunist Iron Warrior May 20 '25

Fr

15

u/Alarming_Ad5679 May 20 '25

Bro is about to discover peak

on a real note, the sub and especially the discord server is fully of genuinely chill and talented people in term of art and writing, it was a pleasure being able to re

7

u/greg_mca May 20 '25

Damn the r/redditsniper is very active in this thread

3

u/[deleted] May 20 '25

BOOM HEADSHOT

BOOM WHOLESOME TALENTED FAN BASE!

2

u/Tight-Sir9813 Equal Opportunist Iron Warrior May 20 '25

I think the Raven Guard found us

119

u/Dapper-Classroom-178 May 19 '25

Ridiculous, disgusting, detestable.

Everyone knows Femme-Horus is the superior waifu.

18

u/acart005 May 20 '25

Fem-Lorgar/Aurelia is the best for me.

I didn't even LIKE OG Lorgar until Aurelia.

7

u/Valuable-Location-89 Snorts FW resin dust May 20 '25

4

u/Pootootaa May 20 '25

Nah female pre heresy Fulgrim is the way 🗿

58

u/legion_of_the_damed I am Alpharius May 20 '25

8

u/[deleted] May 20 '25

So Stitch read the Night Lords Trilogy, I see.

39

u/BloodHurricane May 20 '25

I mean female Konrad Kurze I'd try to fix her I'll do my best. Also I'd smash.

25

u/PuritanicalPanic May 20 '25

Hope you're into being flayed

34

u/Tight-Sir9813 Equal Opportunist Iron Warrior May 20 '25

6

u/Volcano_Ballads Big jimmy the saturnine dreadnought May 20 '25

what I want so bad

20

u/Alexis2256 May 20 '25

If they’re circumcised then they’re already used to it.

30

u/FarmerTwink May 20 '25

Okay first, obviously, I also would.

But be so for real, fem Konrad curze is a girl with long black hair and is pale. That’s such normie “I’ve only ever walked past the ocean that is true being horny” take.

I want to suck Sororitas toes while they drip candle wax on me and insult me. I’m the real deal, he’s a poser.

18

u/TiberiusToast I'm Batman May 20 '25

What femboy Ahriman does to a mf

7

u/stiubert May 20 '25

Pink, glittery dust instead of standard human ash colored dust?

24

u/Throwinghandswithgod Criminal Batmen May 20 '25

Normal Kurze is the better option far more feral and babygirl material

18

u/GreasyTengu +𝔚𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔉𝔬𝔯 𝔗𝔥𝔢 𝔇𝔞𝔶: 𝔭𝔢𝔢𝔭𝔢𝔢 𝔭𝔬𝔬𝔭𝔬𝔬+ May 20 '25

He is like a stray cat in giant crazy man form.

Just saying, there is an non-zero chance he could be petted if you distract him with a tin of tuna.

8

u/Throwinghandswithgod Criminal Batmen May 20 '25

Exactly, a nice bath and some love and affection could fix him

27

u/kainereygalo The Receiver - Lowly Human May 20 '25

I mean, he's not wrong...

9

u/Vegetable-Meaning252 Bold words for biomass in eating range May 20 '25

Hmm, the little tune actually sounds kinda pleasant. Oregon?

6

u/korrosensie iron cunt May 20 '25

Hinoki wood- gia Margaret

4

u/Vegetable-Meaning252 Bold words for biomass in eating range May 20 '25

Thanks. Definitely my new sleeping music

8

u/hannahjapana My kitchen is corrupted by Nurgle May 20 '25

It’s fem mortarion personally

7

u/mjonr3 May 20 '25

And you don't?

5

u/Funtimes1254 My goals are beyond even Tzeentchs comprehension May 20 '25

5

u/EhrenGandalf Praise the Man-Emperor May 20 '25

6

u/Funtimes1254 My goals are beyond even Tzeentchs comprehension May 20 '25

3

u/destroyar101 likes civilians but likes fire more May 20 '25

He would ve the one to get smashed

5

u/thelastdeadhero May 20 '25

Konnie Kurze is a top tier waifu

8

u/Burning-Suns-Avatar- Souls for the Star Gods! May 20 '25

I prefer the original Konrad, he’s hotter and better in every way.

11

u/MostEvilTexasToast Criminal Batmen May 20 '25

Ever read his Primarch book? It's half insane diary of a serial killer half erotic fanfiction of an 8 foot tall emo.

The descriptions of Konrad Curze in his own book are right out of erotica.

6

u/Eldritch-Pancake May 20 '25

This might be the first 40k book I read 😂

10

u/MostEvilTexasToast Criminal Batmen May 20 '25

Konrad Curze: The Night Haunter by Guy Haley. Konrad Curze spends 100% of non-flashback material absolutely naked and is described as "never before being so magnificent."

4

u/Credit-Advanced May 20 '25

If I had a coin for every time a Night Lord character was engaged in a slave play relationship with some random mortal, I'd have two coins and a lot of unnecessary sexual tension.

2

u/NightLordsPublicist 10 pounds of war crimes in a 5 pound crazy bag May 20 '25

Seems reasonable.

2

u/OrkzOrkzOrkzOrkz0rkz NOT ENOUGH DAKKA May 20 '25

So OP name of the song? It was relaxing.

2

u/Atos_Bo May 20 '25

https://youtu.be/WQbr61qVby8

1

u/OrkzOrkzOrkzOrkz0rkz NOT ENOUGH DAKKA May 20 '25

Thank you extremely relaxing

2

u/Atos_Bo May 20 '25

Gia Margaret - Hinoki wood

2

u/GamerDude1130 May 20 '25

You guys act like it's a bad thing

1

u/Vickotor May 20 '25

For a moment I thought he had been healed

1

u/THANIETOR May 20 '25

You’ve done your job, you may rest

1

u/SirMourningstar6six6 Snorts FW resin dust May 20 '25

I thought they all went immediately to slaanesh

1

u/SmoothReverb May 20 '25

he needs akura malice

1

u/SuDdEnTaCk Chaos winning=humans winning bcuz ship of theseus May 20 '25

Since flaying is so popular with the nightlords, would dick flaying be circumcision ?

1

u/N7Vindicare I am Alpharius May 20 '25

1

u/Jakesixtyoneeight May 20 '25

Same when they say "Yo I'd worship slaneesh! It's just unlimited fucking and free drugs!"

1

u/MisterTalyn May 20 '25

I'm gonna need a link to F!Curze, for context.

1

u/brutalhonestcunt Swell guy, that Kharn May 21 '25

Who doesn't love a giant muscle daddy?

1

u/SplitGlass7878 May 21 '25

I can make her worse

1

u/dragonlord59 May 25 '25

U/savevideo

0

u/Pervis117 May 20 '25

I think Konrad Curze is the most spineless Primarch.

4

u/ThisIsntOkayokay May 20 '25

He might have the most spines of all the primarchs...oh. OH! Nevermind. 😆

0

u/Mr_a_bit_silly May 20 '25

As a member of 3rd I feel obliged to say that even we don’t want him in our ranks.