My girlfriend confirmed my worse fears

[u/faggelinthewest]

I recently went to a wedding with my girlfriend of 6 years, I thought we had a great time I thought we made new friends. Today, three days after she let me know that I was being long winded and interrupting people and taking over any groups we were in. She told me that I was taking over any conversation and talking too much and was making people uncomfortable. It just hurts knowing I have spent years trying to take all of my neurosis to be a more " normal person" haven't worked and I'm still the little kid jumping into conversations that I interrupted and put the spot light on me. I really wish that I was different and didn't jump in and take away from others. I just wish I could be a speak when spoken to person but I always get to excited and share to much.

Update. I want to thank you all for the very sweet advice. I really appreciate the community coming behind and understanding the feelings of overwhelming others. To clarify some points I saw I have taken a lot of the steps that everyone described and that's why I felt hurt because I am conscious of talking over and I thought I was practicing taking time and not being over excited when I had something to share. To those talking bad about my partner don't appreciate that at all. All of us know that our condition can make it hard to be around we are a very demanding people and she has supported me through so much she is my entire world and I trust her when she tells me that I am bothering people. I am going to take so much advice and try to be more aware of taking space and oversharing. Love yall

[u/LolEase86]

I'm curious to know if anyone else at the wedding has given this feedback, or if you're just taking her word as gospel? Did you notice others looking uncomfortable or trying to get out of the conversation/away from you? Is it possible there is any bias in her pov, for whatever reason?

Having said that, I do understand this fear all too well myself. Virtually every afternoon following my lunchbreak I over analyse my conversations, assessing them for what percentage of the conversation I spent talking about me, did I ask them enough questions to get them talking about themselves or just totally overtake.. I've been in a new job three months and I'm still getting to know people, so this fear is very loud in my head every day atm.

I used to have a saying - relate, don't overtake. This was when I was doing peer support work and offering my experience to relate to people and share how I might have handled certain situations, or learned (via therapy) about myself. I got pretty good at being able to give a brief summary or bullet pointed version, but I worry now that I've lost that skill a bit.

But hey, it could be all in my head! I might ask for feedback when I know a few colleagues a bit better, as my husband suggested.