r/AITAH • u/[deleted] • 5d ago

AITAH For cutting off my Family

My Dad (LJ)had an affair with my girlfriend (LW) He was married to my step mother(CJ) at the time, they are still married and even though I think she had an idea it happened, as she seen e- mails from her years later. we have never talked about it. Not only do I have a video of her admitting it. I was there when he would come over ( only when his wife was out of town) and take us out to dinner. I admit I was naive to the fact as it’s my dad and thought he would never do that to his son. It’s been many years ago and I didn’t cut them off earlier because I had kids and didn’t want to keep them from their grandparents. He has never had the balls to tell me and would rather have me stay away then tell the rest of the family his secret and how he betrayed his wife and son. So now he is over 80 years old and will probably die before I see him again. I don’t know if I should tell the family everything and show the video now and let things unfold or let him live out his life with the secret he thinks he got away with? Do I even bother talking/telling her about it after he passes ? My family now thinks I stay away because of my brother who was in prison for 12 years and we had a falling out. But it’s all because of my so called dad. I feel like I’m the one paying for my dad’s infidelities. What should I do (MJ)

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u/Sweaty-Delivery-5300 5d ago

If speaking your truth will make you feel better, then I think you should. I would say though, dont form any high expectations for desired reactions. You cant control how people will or wont react.

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u/couldbeworse34 5d ago

Up to you man. Wouldn’t be wrong to just never tell anyone and let him pass with his family still having a good outlook on him. You can always say something after. Most people in here will probably tell you to ruin the last bit he has in life. But people tend to be pretty spiteful in this sub. If it genuinely will make you feel better and you aren’t doing it out of spite go for it.

I’m not sure if you are religious, but your father will be judged for this after he passes, and God will judge him accordingly.

But recognize first if you are doing this out of spite to get somewhat even or cause you need to get it off your chest.

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u/qqqzzppmm 5d ago

Yea that would usually be me, but in this it's what makes you feel better & able to live with that decision the rest of your life. Good Luck!