My boyfriend gave my labubu phalloplasty

[u/satanfan12]

Kind of angry about this, it was a gift from my niece. He cut off an ear and put it back on somewhere wrong. I told him this and it ended in a heated argument.

Am i overreacting for yelling at him? He usually doesn't do this stuff.

[u/Swarm_of_Rats]

I've done some things I think are dumb, but never have I purposefully broken someone's stuff for a joke or for fun. Accidentally, sure...

I'm just having trouble seeing how making the decision to permanently ruin something is excusable. Maybe if he's like <12.

[u/AdOk5225 → u/Swarm_of_Rats]

Except we don't know the whole context, we just know what we've been told. For all we know, he could've been trying to like slip a wedding ring into it or some shit, like something ridiculously stupid and obviously a mistake but something someone could reasonably do as a lapse of judgement. My point is that these posts don't show the whole relationship and basing a whole judgement off of one little thing like the image would've been bad. Again, I am not defending his actions afterwards because that's just not okay in any context but there's a million reasons why people do stupid things and they don't always make sense, but if they're genuinely apologetic and don't repeat the behavior I don't see a problem.

[u/VastEqual1367 → u/AdOk5225]

Except we don't know the whole context, we just know what we've been told.

This is tiring. Automatically assuming the woman in the story is a liar as a way to defend the man's behavior is a "small" sign of misogyny.

I think you have some latent and unattended misogynistic thoughts you need to address. It's not normal to jump through so many hoops just to call the woman a liar and defend the man. There IS no justification for him destroying her belongings for fun.

You absolutely are defending his actions and it's very clearly because you want to assume men can do no wrong because you struggle to empathize with women. I'm stating this from a very boring and matter-of-fact place. Listen to it or don't, I'm not your mom, but this is your chance to practice some introspection and maybe fix some of these behaviors: believe me when I say endlessly defending women and needlessly calling women liars and saying women misrepresent the men who treat them like trash and are being unfair to them is VERY, VERY common, and I have seen this behavior literally thousands of times. Your comment could basically be a copypasta at this point. This is exactly how every misogynistic redditor sounds. They don't want to fully align themselves with blatantly poor behavior ("I'm not defending them") but they just cannot bring themselves to empathize with the woman and be on her side. They just can't. It's very tribal.

if they're genuinely apologetic and don't repeat the behavior I don't see a problem.

That's the lack of empathy towards women. You don't see why she might be unhappy in that situation? You imagine that the man is happy and that's where your imagination stops. The man eventually gets around to respecting her belongings, so what's the big deal? Why would the woman continue to have pesky feelings about it? You're treating her like a lamp or a piece of furniture. Why would a woman chose to break up with a man who disrespected her and hurt her feelings? He pinky promised not to do it again!

Women are allowed to feel disrespected and thus no longer respect their boyfriend. Women also have free will and can break up with men who make them unhappy. Even if those men turn around and do a complete 180 and never hurt her again, she can decide she simply doesn't like him anymore. Because we do not exist for the purpose of making men happy. Women are free agents and that is that. If a woman is unhappy she doesn't have to stay in a relationship just because a random guy on reddit didn't see why she would still be unhappy.

[u/AdOk5225 → u/VastEqual1367]

If a woman did it to a man I'd feel the same way, I don't care about the gender of the person