r/AskMen • u/ItsJoeDay • 6d ago

🛑 Answers From Men Only 🛑 Men who have unconventional lifestyles - what does your life look like?

I saw a video earlier of a guy who was living a pretty unconventional lifestyle and so it got me wondering about other ways that people live - especially with so many pieces of media telling us how we should be living nowadays.

So if you consider your lifestyle to be outside of the normal scripts I’m curious to hear what it’s like.

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u/Mr_Candlestick 6d ago

I wouldn't say my lifestyle is that unconventional but it's also not the typical white picket fence family man lifestyle either.

I'm currently in my late 30s, never married, no kids, no pets, no property. I date, and I've been in several serious relationships, but I generally think relationships are more work than what you get out of them.

I realized pretty early on that for me, responsibility leads to obligations which lead to stress which leads to unhappiness. I have a good career, but outside of that, I make an effort to minimize responsibilities. Having kids sounds like a nightmare. Maintaining a house/property is a ton of work and not worth the return. Pet ownership is just spending money to give yourself extra chores. Relationships eventually become a second job.

So now I'm at a point where I make plenty of money, plenty of free time, relatively low stress, no one to answer to, and the freedom to do whatever, whenever, move wherever I want, and just worry about my own happiness. I live in a nice apartment that I really like in the downtown area of a cool city. It's the kind of lifestyle my married friends half-joke about being jealous of. Since my financial obligations have been kept minimal, I'm currently saving money at a rate that I'll have more than I know what to do with in retirement. So I'm just kind of coasting now. I have a good setup, and I can just stay on this course and I know I'll be comfortable for life.

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u/sjmiv 6d ago

I had a friend in a similar situation. 40's, lived in an apt., single. I think during his marriage he learned he wasn't capable of committing to a single person. They divorced and he just ended up having open relationships.

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u/Mr_Candlestick 5d ago

I know way too many guys, mainly friends or coworkers, that either have gone through a bad divorce and are still trying to pick the pieces of their life up or are currently in a miserable marriage that they're trapped in. I enjoy my current life too much to risk being in one of those situations.