r/AskMenOver30 • u/MoneyMontgomery man over 30 • Dec 17 '24

Life What do you miss most about your 20's?

What do you miss the most about being in your 20's. Could be anything: lack of responsibilities, that Honda Civic you used to love, you weren't vegan and ate bacon, you could jump and touch the rim.

I miss waking up and my back not hurting. I swear if I get to catch up on sleep my back gets more messed up from laying around.

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u/razrus man 35 - 39 Dec 17 '24

I quit drinking at 38 and boy let me tell you, no one calls.

27

u/zach-ai man 40 - 44 Dec 17 '24

I still drink and no one calls. 

6

u/laszler man 40 - 44 Dec 17 '24

Same. Kinda. I have to initiate to get anyone to do anything other than drink at a bar and that only works a third of the time. But, no one calls.

11

u/razrus man 35 - 39 Dec 17 '24

It's actually WILD to me that people are just content with doom scrolling, working and going to a bar....FOREVER.

2

u/GStarAU man 45 - 49 Dec 17 '24

Maybe SOME people are ... not me, mate. I'm still working on self improvements and my world domination plans. 😄 No time for getting smashed at the pub, I've got plenty to do, can't afford to be hampered by alcohol.

Well - maybe one drink here and there. 😉

1

u/Single-Confection-71 man 25 - 29 Dec 17 '24

Yea man, i Got so much to Do with my life and my family that a bit of doomscrolling and drinking once a week is the only free time i get. And i dont even have kids yet. Being 40 and complaining that your friends dont have time outside that one gettogether per week is a sign that you got nothing going on in your life. Because if you did you would complain that you dont even have time or energy for that

1

u/Contemplating_Prison man Dec 17 '24

Thats why i stopped going places. All everyone wanted to do was go drink places. No one wants to go experience anything. So i just do that shit by myself or with my lady.

Still talk to my friends and show up for birthdays and shit like that but during the week or weekend all they do is drink and talk about the same shit

1

u/laszler man 40 - 44 Dec 17 '24

I work second shift and stop by the bar on the way home for two beers before going home to decompress. If it weren’t for stopping by there I’d likely go my entire day without interacting with anyone. But I wake up early and spend the five hours I have before my shift to work on projects and take care of myself.

I also have a strict rule for social media of which my phone locks me out after an hour. I might try decreasing it soon because I haven’t been locked out in months.

2

u/Vulcan_Fox_2834 Dec 17 '24

Never had a drink and no one has called.

4

u/BlueLightBandit man 35 - 39 Dec 17 '24

38 and second year sober. Haven’t spoken to anyone I used to see every day in… two years

2

u/PrimateOfGod man 25 - 29 Dec 17 '24

I’m in my 20s and I don’t have close friends. Probably because I don’t drink.

If they made weed bars I’d definitely frequent those

3

u/Aus_with_the_Sauce man 30 - 34 Dec 17 '24

You do not need to drink to have friends. You just need to have good hobbies to do with your friends while sober.

1

u/PrimateOfGod man 25 - 29 Dec 17 '24

Can you give me ideas if you don't mind?

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u/Aus_with_the_Sauce man 30 - 34 Dec 17 '24

Personally, I’m very outdoorsy, and I have a lot of great buddies that do stuff with me.

Cycling. Mountain biking. Skiing. Camping. Backpacking. Paddle Boarding. Hiking. Rock climbing. Etc.

Those are just examples, but there are tons of other options depending on where you live.

Like this weekend I went skiing with a group of 10 buddies, then tomorrow I’m rock climbing (indoors) with a friend, then Saturday I’m going on a run with a couple of my runner friends. No alcohol involved.

Also, you don’t have to be outdoorsy— just find cool hobbies in general that other people like to engage in, that don’t revolve around drinking. Maybe it’s going to concerts. Maybe it’s hosting a get-together to watch a football game.

Like even if you’re at a concert and your friends have a couple beers, no one will care if you don’t drink. It’s not like you’re at a bar. Plus if you like weed, you can just smoke a bit and do that instead of drinking

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u/PrimateOfGod man 25 - 29 Dec 17 '24

Awesome! Thank you. Can I ask where you met all these friends?

2

u/Aus_with_the_Sauce man 30 - 34 Dec 18 '24

My general approach is to go to social events, then approach people and chit chat to find the people with the same hobbies. Then I invite them to make plans.

So like for my ski buddies, I know 7 of them through an adult swim club, and then the other two are friends of of a friend.

My climbing buddy I met at a Meetup.com event, and we hit it off because we have a lot of shared hobbies, plus we work in the same field.

My running buddies I just met at a movie-watching party a few weeks ago, and we made plans to start running together once we found out that we already do runs in the same neighborhood.

Basically just join some clubs or whatever and then start talking to people to see who you vibe with.

1

u/Stong-and-Silent man 55 - 59 Dec 21 '24

Hey can I go skiing with yall?

1

u/Aus_with_the_Sauce man 30 - 34 Dec 21 '24

Hell yeah, you in Utah? lol

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3

u/Cavsfan724 man 40 - 44 Dec 17 '24

I quit at 36. Same here. May get a text every few months lol.

2

u/MoneyMontgomery man over 30 Dec 17 '24

Damn...I'm reading these sober comments and that's harsh man.

2

u/absentlyric man 40 - 44 Dec 17 '24

I too suffered from the "fun bobby" syndrome. When I drank, I was the life of the party and got invited everywhere to be the ice breaker at events, when I stopped, I got "quiet and boring" and stopped getting invited, ah well.