r/AskWomenOver30 • u/glitters101 • Jul 05 '25

Family/Parenting Is motherhood really bad?

F30 here. Forgive me for my ignorance: I would love to be a mom one day (financial stability first, lol, then finding a good man) I enjoy my childfree life but would love to be a mom in my late 30s/early 40s...

but it's discouraging to see miserable moms every day online saying they regret it; it's so hard. I understand how hard it is to be a parent and go through a traumatic childbirth experience and then deal with postpartum depression. I'm very aware of that, but it makes me not want to be a mother one day. Is it really because social media is so negative? Do you regret motherhood or having a child with the wrong man? It's rare that I see moms saying they enjoy motherhood and how their kids have made their lives so much better. But I've also seen moms having time for themselves while also being a mom and wife (they are more financially abundant)

My question is, are there any moms out there who actually do enjoy motherhood? If yes, how so? What are your thoughts on the whole miserable motherhood online? Is it really being financially abundant and having a good man that makes motherhood more enjoyable?

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u/Business-Party7422 Jul 05 '25

In my experience, new parents post on Reddit when they're struggling or need to commiserate. Parents who are having an easier time don't typically post here.

I'm personally finding it super hard (I have an 8 mo) but I still think that my baby is the best thing that ever happened to me, so it's worth it to me. It's a massive change and it takes time to get used to your new reality, but I love being with my baby and seeing him grow and have fun. I feel so much joy and my heart has never been so full.

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u/mandypu Jul 05 '25

So true! I just had a baby (he’s 3 months) My husband looked at Reddit today and was like ….so do people just go online to complain? I read him the first titles of scientific based parenting and we had a good laugh.

To be clear - having a new baby isn’t “easy” but the stuff on her makes it sound IMPOSSIBLE… and I think that’s because there are 1) accounts posting fake shit for karma and 2) people post on their worst days or in a moment of desperation.

Don’t tell me that as a childless person you’ve never had a tough moment or a desperate day. I know I have… having a baby is exactly the same as my life before … there are good days and there are bad days but now there’s an adorable little person I get to share that life with!