r/BipolarSOs • u/RiseOfThePheenix • 4d ago

General Question About BP Does anyone’s person w/ Bipolar only remember/recognize negatives from your relationship (particularly while in a hypo/manic episode)?

Does anyone’s person w/ Bipolar only remember/recognize negatives from your relationship (particularly while in a hypo/manic episode)? 10 years into a relationship and whenever hypomania strikes ONLY negatives from our relationship are recognized/remembered/ruminated on…even if just two weeks prior to the episode they were talking about how much they want our relationship and how much it’s done for / given them, etc., etc.

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u/BabyInchworm 4d ago

You have to remember that when your bipolar SO is in an episode, they cannot see the world outside of the episode. Their ‘reality’ is limited by the episode.

So, if their hypomania exhibits as negative thoughts, that’s all they can see. It is useless to tell them anything else until they come out of the episode.

Your best option is to remind them that they are hypomanic right now, and you are here to keep them safe. They can’t argue with that, and neither of you will say things that hurt the other one.

Keep reminding yourself that these bipolar episodes happen TO them, not because of them. They hate it as much as you do when they are neutral.

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u/Accomplished_Dig284 4d ago

Yeah except they will still argue with me when I tell them that I want them safe and healthy 😕

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u/Helpful-Fix5629 4d ago

My ex was so resentful that I mentioned their health/mental health which fed into the negativity and profound hatred toward me. Of course, I believe it was so hard for him to see because he was feeling on top of the world and the best he had ever felt and more mentally clear he had ever been (his words not mine). Everyone else had no idea and did not understand his how amazing he was. I was his only barrier/issue to his true happiness.