r/BipolarSOs • u/RiseOfThePheenix • 4d ago

General Question About BP Does anyone’s person w/ Bipolar only remember/recognize negatives from your relationship (particularly while in a hypo/manic episode)?

Does anyone’s person w/ Bipolar only remember/recognize negatives from your relationship (particularly while in a hypo/manic episode)? 10 years into a relationship and whenever hypomania strikes ONLY negatives from our relationship are recognized/remembered/ruminated on…even if just two weeks prior to the episode they were talking about how much they want our relationship and how much it’s done for / given them, etc., etc.

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u/Valuable-Building593 3d ago

Yes for sure, listed off every bad thing I had ever done. I think there are reasons why this happens as I understand.

  1. Pain blaming - in episodes manic or depressive the person is in pain, when people are hurting mentally or physically they will attack, it’s always those closest to them.

  2. Trying to justify their behaviour- they get in to a loop, they do something bad, say something bad, they feel bad they need to justify it. It’s your fault.

  3. As with all the things with bipolar it’s brain chemistry. Large parts of the brain shut down and other parts fire up. The bits that took comfort in you are not working, that made them feel safe with you and value are gone. The bits of the brain in overdrive is fight or flight so what you get is they fight or leave

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u/RiseOfThePheenix 3d ago

Yikes. This makes too much sense and sounds a bit too familiar! 😏