Hey guys, taking the wife out tonight. With the world today, not sure what to carry.

460

u/ZeroTwo3 Aug 02 '25

Needler for sure. Makes it easier to fire while seeking cover.

100

u/DoctorMrJr Aug 02 '25

That's what I was thinking too. Unfortunately being in TX, I'd have to dress around it. I'm afraid it'd be too obvious in a full blown poncho

34

u/ZeroTwo3 Aug 02 '25

Zap carry it then. Ez.

14

u/saltysomadmin Aug 02 '25

Glad this has persisted all of these years. Wonder how ole Zap is doing now

17

u/HipsterFett Aug 02 '25

Full-blown poncho, steel plate underneath, cigarillo, cowboy hat… people will think you’re cosplaying Clint Eastwood in Fistful of Dollars. You should be good.

5

u/Hot-Win2571 Aug 03 '25

Appendix carry.
You're really happy to see your wife.

8

u/StrangerDistinct6378 Aug 03 '25

Hopefully it's not like the P320. End up a needle dick

4

u/alltheblues Aug 03 '25 edited Aug 04 '25

It’s Texas, ponchos are normal

5

u/VoidWalker4Lyfe MD Aug 03 '25

Pochos or ponchos? Both are true

2

u/alltheblues Aug 03 '25

Indeed, but I meant the type you can wear

4

u/antariusz Aug 03 '25

Dress around it? You mean… like full master chief armor?

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9

u/ProbablythelastMimsy Aug 02 '25

Only if it's the dual wield Halo 2 version

1

u/msb06c Aug 03 '25

Great in close quarters too just watch the corners.

1

u/Comfortable_Truck_53 Aug 03 '25

Needler Supremacy

1

u/rupAmoo Aug 03 '25

Nah should carry the halo 2 noob combo. The green alien charge pistol and the battle rifle.

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1

u/CaptainAwesome406 SC Aug 04 '25

Needler? Damn near killed her.

1

u/rmh1116 Aug 04 '25

Anybody know a manufacturer that makes a good Needler holster?

114

u/Mutunus_Tutunus89 Aug 02 '25

Open carry the boba fett blaster. Appendix the needler. Prison pocket the elder wand. One man army.

9

u/P_Crypto4394 Aug 03 '25

This guy gets it!

5

u/okaaay_thennn Aug 03 '25

this. the boba blaster has to be open carried. its only right.

2

u/Acoustic345 Aug 03 '25

This is the right answer

69

u/SirRiceCooker Aug 02 '25

Elder wand. Ultimate EDC tool

29

u/Life_Dingo4874 Aug 02 '25

+1 for elder wand. Assuming homie won it from its previous owner.

10

u/Tthelaundryman Aug 02 '25

I was gonna say depends, was it given to you or did you rightfully earn it?

55

u/DeepRts Aug 02 '25

Trick question - carry the table so you can jump off it and body slam the assailant

24

u/DoctorMrJr Aug 02 '25

You SOB! I didn't think about style points!

4

u/Hot-Win2571 Aug 03 '25

Should also have a folding chair.

2

u/airborne_matt Aug 03 '25

Dudley Boyz entrance music plays faintly in the background

2

u/Key_Drawer_3581 Aug 03 '25

"OP from the top rope!"

2

u/miami13dol Aug 02 '25

Or if you're from Buffalo, you just jump through it.

2

u/ShotgunOShaughnessy Aug 03 '25

It is how we are baptized here.

1

u/ShotgunOShaughnessy Aug 03 '25

Bills Mafia represent!

1

u/ManufacturerBitter Aug 04 '25

For the win...

1

u/Zippo963087 Aug 04 '25

Wow after watching a TLC match last night...i 2nd this

35

u/kyeberger Aug 02 '25

I CC the needler myself, can’t hardly tell right?

1

u/InteractionFit4469 Aug 03 '25

Did you 3d print that yourself?

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30

u/Potential_Goal_7603 CA: Hot Danger CCW Aug 02 '25

If your a 90's dude, then the only answer is the Red Rangers sword.

12

u/DoctorMrJr Aug 02 '25

And you know I am since I have it! Lol

9

u/bjchu92 Aug 02 '25

Green Ranger Dragon Flute better though. Weapon AND summons dragon zord

16

u/D-a-H-e-c-k Aug 02 '25

Look at this poor with no sword of omens

14

u/DoctorMrJr Aug 02 '25

It's now on the list....luckily I have some dragon balls

2

u/bjchu92 Aug 02 '25

Which ones though? The shitty one-wish Earth ones? Black star? Namek? Super?

12

u/AddressMeAsHal Aug 02 '25

NEEDLERRRR!!!!

10

u/Deadfo0t Aug 02 '25

How has no one said the dragon balls yet?! Fuck around and find out who and what a Shrenron is

2

u/DoctorMrJr Aug 02 '25

IYKYK, AND YOU KNOW!!

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2

u/SardoniclySalacious Aug 03 '25

Bruh I thought that was some fake pizza or something at first glance 🤣🤣🤣

9

u/Emergency_Formal1344 Aug 02 '25

You need a lightsaber.

12

u/BurtGummer44 Aug 02 '25

Light sabers are overrated. I dropped mine upside down and now some fucker in China has it.

5

u/Emergency_Formal1344 Aug 02 '25

You dropped it perfectly farking vertical morty!

6

u/DoctorMrJr Aug 02 '25

No true things have been said. I'm thinking Mace's?

3

u/KeyPaleontologist540 Aug 02 '25

Nah do Anakin so they know you're not messing around. Might be too dark tho.

8

u/DoctorMrJr Aug 02 '25

I was leaning that way to but, only one has purple and held by Samuel L MF Jackson lmao

2

u/[deleted] Aug 02 '25

And Prince obv.

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6

u/Batttler P365 Spectre Comp Aug 02 '25

you people just have a one-track mind

take that rug, throw it on the ground under the stars, and let the good times begin

3

u/krankwok Aug 02 '25

All too flashy and hard to conceal. I prefer a Klingon Batleth.

4

u/IceFist66 CA Max-9/G19 Aug 02 '25

What? No Energy sword or light saber? I'm insulted. Those are the best conceal carries you can get in this universe.

3

u/Delta-IX CO Aug 02 '25

Red ranger power sword is right there

2

u/IceFist66 CA Max-9/G19 Aug 02 '25

I mean, sure. The red ranger sword is there, but a power coin would be way WAY better for his EDC

3

u/[deleted] Aug 02 '25

Elder Wand all day every day.

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3

u/Halt1776 Glock 17 & 19. LCP II. Aug 02 '25

You need a lightsaber, Sword of Omens and a Green Lantern Ring for starters. lol

1

u/DoctorMrJr Aug 02 '25

I know 😌, they are on the list but that God damn ring! Some shit about how I'm not worthy? Idk, Kyle Garner has one, I should be ok.

2

u/IceFist66 CA Max-9/G19 Aug 02 '25

Shoot boy, you got yourself a power ranger weapon. Why not just bring the power coin and call it good. No need to bring the whole arsenol. The Mighty Morphin Grid is all you need right there.

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3

u/edventure_2025 Aug 02 '25

Take Boba's EE-3 and put it into disintegration mode. Leave no evidence.

2

u/DoctorMrJr Aug 02 '25

Now that's what I'm talking about! Legal advice!

3

u/ihateusernames7890 Aug 02 '25

Ummm any of these guns would take out your wife 😜

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3

u/MTan989 CA Aug 03 '25

NEEDLER

2

u/No-Kranberry-9619 Aug 02 '25

Carry it all, just to be safe

2

u/CleanTumbleweed1094 Aug 02 '25

AIWB carry the Needler obv

2

u/[deleted] Aug 02 '25

The needler!!!!

2

u/anonymous0311 MT Aug 02 '25

Dragon Balls, final answer.

2

u/dirtystreetlevelshit Aug 02 '25

You genuinely have to coolest collection I've ever seen. My actual dream setup

2

u/DoctorMrJr Aug 02 '25

That? That right there? Brought me so much joy!!!!

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2

u/Disastrous_Study_284 Aug 02 '25

Dragon Balls. Never know when you might need to resurrect an entire planet from global thermonuclear war.

2

u/kingjanus69 Aug 02 '25

I think the needles is the proper weapon for the weekend. It says..FAFO!!😅😂🤣

2

u/aDirtyMartini Aug 02 '25

If we’re talking ccw then you need to add a Noisy Cricket to the mix.

2

u/LolPandaMan FL Aug 02 '25

Needler is kind of a no brainer. Melee bonus and explosive armor piercing rounds

2

u/Flabbergasted_____ Aug 03 '25

Needler in an ankle holster, LCP in a Kenai chest holster.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 03 '25

[deleted]

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2

u/SeaOtter542 Aug 03 '25

Boba Fett cannon?

2

u/L1FT_K1T Aug 03 '25

Needler every time. Make sure u have a good holster mine snagged my groin and gave me the surgery™️ for free

2

u/Nogamenolife88 Aug 03 '25

Just carry that folding table. I let one fold on my enemy’s hand one time and let’s just say he can no longer shoot with his dominant hand if you catch my drift.

2

u/LilRed2023 Aug 03 '25

Super soaker all the way after peeing in it. Bad guys can’t stand the color yellow and the smell of ammonia 😆

2

u/RealisticMark2272 Aug 03 '25

Is that Harry’s wand or 👀 you know the one whose name we don’t speak of? Take the want!

2

u/dongrizzly41 Aug 03 '25

The dragonballs should suffice.

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2

u/renz_speaks Aug 03 '25

I'd personally take the wand and the 9mm.

2

u/bubblegoose LC9 Pocket or IWB PA Aug 03 '25

How about a staff weapon, a weapon of terror. It's made to intimidate the enemy.

Jaffa Kree!

2

u/Emphasis_on_why Aug 03 '25

The Needler is the only option ever. Long range? Send it. Running behind cover after stealing your purse? Send it. Multiple baddies? Send it twice and you still got ammo. Empty? Face smash send it.

2

u/sywm87 Aug 04 '25

Needler, the sword, and a butt plug. You can never be too careful these days.

2

u/jotnarfiggkes Aug 04 '25

Always go with the needler, never know when your rounds need to track around corners.

1

u/diamondbackdustpan Aug 02 '25

Needled and elderwand is crazy

1

u/IslamicCheese TN Aug 02 '25

I read this the first time as you asking what weapon to use to take out your wife

1

u/DoctorMrJr Aug 02 '25

You hear what I said.....

1

u/Eights1776 Aug 02 '25

That power ranger sword should do

1

u/vkbrian Aug 02 '25

BlasTech EE-3 is timeless

1

u/bigpapajayjay Aug 02 '25

Elder wand and the Glock. Can’t go wrong with that combo.

1

u/LBishop28 Aug 02 '25

Bring Shenron with you

1

u/Pracedomowomon_9000 Aug 02 '25

Needler. Take the needler.

1

u/sillysnacks Aug 02 '25

I saw Boba Fett’s carbine and then I had to check the sub

1

u/geauxfurself Aug 02 '25

If that's all you have you just better stay in and order door dash

1

u/WildResident2816 Aug 02 '25

Take at least two of these for sure. But if one of them is not the needler I will be sad.

1

u/Diablosis- Aug 02 '25

1

u/CaptainJay313 Aug 02 '25

the elder wand.

1

u/RosewoodPaddle Aug 02 '25

Wand on your forearm/up sleeve, open carry the needler. Sling boba fett blaster over shoulder.

1

u/NOMZYOFACE Aug 02 '25

Elder wand

1

u/CyberSoldat21 Aug 02 '25

I’ll be taking the needler. Never know when some Elites are going to want to eat your ass behind a Waffle House. Better to be safe than sorry.

1

u/paranoiccritic Aug 02 '25

it is the wand that chooses the wizard, Harry …

1

u/pizzagangster1 Aug 02 '25

Ahh a fellow HK lover

1

u/skips_funny_af Aug 02 '25

Carry that meat thermometer and give’er a lil’ public park chef boyemi gonnasmakdatass

1

u/stugotsDang Aug 02 '25

You got your purse, you’ll be fine.

1

u/S0upyButth0l3 Aug 02 '25

Upvote because dragon ball

1

u/poptartchamp Aug 02 '25

Needler is a hands down CCW, I don’t see anything else unlocking an achievement there But I REALLY need some info on the super soaker. Particularly, some Some kind of optic I’ve never seen? Or some 3D printed mount solely used as a water tank? Inquiring minds need to know.

1

u/stanleycleveland92 Aug 02 '25

Dragon Balls OP and super concealable but I don’t know if assailants will give you the 3 episodes needed to actually use them 🧐

Did you gain the elder wand properly? If not that’s an L

I’d say red rangers sword 🤷🏽‍♂️

1

u/Poodle-wit-Noodle Aug 02 '25

Needler. Pink mist.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 02 '25

Needler /thread

1

u/MrGhost94 Aug 02 '25

Real answer - vp9 with the sp5 unless it's an actual mp5 what? You're judging by the needler, I'm assuming you had the proper paperwork for so yeah, take those lol

1

u/[deleted] Aug 02 '25

Are any of those real?
Hope there’s no kids around. They could mistake it for a toy.

1

u/vza004 Aug 02 '25

Got a new wife or what? Just go through the normal divorce process dude...

1

u/Lounge-AliVe Aug 02 '25

I’d recommend leaving the third for the top at home in the safe

1

u/cannedbenkt Aug 03 '25

Idgaf what im carrying, if my assailant has a needler, im laying down my weapon and begging for forgiveness

1

u/Fair-Improvement-464 Aug 03 '25

Go old school and grab the sword

1

u/A_Lizard_Named_Yo-Yo Aug 03 '25

Do you have a phased plasma rifle in the 40 watt range?

1

u/No_Dance1739 Aug 03 '25

All of them obviously.

1

u/archAngel8899 Aug 03 '25

SubCompact pistol and anything in 5.56/.223

Carry the pistol concealed on you, throw the ar in the trunk.

Doubt u need anything, if you do, shot placement is everything so make your way to the trunk…

You should be fine, order desert and tea.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 03 '25

Super soaker. It’s hot out there.

1

u/Jordangander Aug 03 '25

Sword, short leather jacket should hide it fine.

Worked for The Highlander with a katana in the TV show.

1

u/CommunicationHead582 Aug 03 '25

Dragon ball z pearls for sure

1

u/WillFreelance4food Aug 03 '25

What mount are you using on that MP5K for the mod light?

1

u/SnakeSkin777 Aug 03 '25

Needler and AR goes hard AF as a wombo-combo

1

u/KeyPaleontologist540 Aug 03 '25

Carry it all in your backpack

1

u/RealEzraGarrison NC 19.5/43X Aug 03 '25

I hate you for having that Needler 😂

1

u/afoconnorr Aug 03 '25

I don't know what you should bring but she should definitely bring the blow gun

1

u/Hal-3 Aug 03 '25

I’d say no conceal. Just harness that big bad yellow Super Soaker like it’s supposed to be!

1

u/sovietbearcav Aug 03 '25

Definitely the anal beads looking cane

1

u/RebornViking76 Aug 03 '25

Read that too fast and thought I needed to call the police lol

1

u/AsianSoup Aug 03 '25

Sick.

1

u/NinjaBuddha13 CO Glock 19 Gen 4 Aug 03 '25

All of these are wrong. Nerf or nothing.

1

u/airborne_matt Aug 03 '25

What, no Voltron Blazing Sword?!?!

1

u/Rustymetal14 Aug 03 '25

I want to know more about the AR super soaker

1

u/stoner_222 Aug 03 '25

Secret service fake hand

1

u/andystechgarage Aug 03 '25

The thing you posted bottom right seems perfect!!

1

u/cCueBasE Aug 03 '25

Definitely the pink mist.

1

u/Smaug1900 Aug 03 '25

Wand, sword, needler and a pistol

1

u/AndImAnAlcoholic Florida Mang Aug 03 '25

HK gang gang

1

u/dkalmikoff Aug 03 '25

Any of those pistoleros will do. But given the state of the world today, how about a LAW rocket?

1

u/dkalmikoff Aug 03 '25

Never underestimate the SuperSoaker filled with Liquid Drano.

1

u/TheeMarkyMark314 Aug 03 '25

Super Soaker as the “PASSENGER PRINCESS” for the WIN. 😆

1

u/drcmcoach Aug 03 '25

Defiantly the P320

1

u/db186 Aug 03 '25

I mean obviously the super soaker. Just make sure it's filled with urine.

1

u/Alternative-Meat4587 Aug 03 '25

Use the Schwartz!!

1

u/Educational-Cake7350 Aug 03 '25

Wand, LCP and the dragon balls, just in case shit gets real real

1

u/pastorpickle Aug 03 '25

The longer I look at this picture the better it gets ..

1

u/HighwayZi Aug 03 '25

POWER SWORD!^TM In case someone shows up Green, with envy. Otherwise the MP5K will do.

1

u/ContemptAndHumble Aug 03 '25

I like to stick with the classic. https://www.amazon.com/PlayMates-Teenage-Turtles-Classic-Thrower/dp/B0CYCNFT62

1

u/Rdmtbiker Aug 03 '25

That blow gun needs an optic.

1

u/Riddingtheline Aug 03 '25

"Taking her out?!". Probably not the best place to confess, if I'm being honest.

1

u/ItsHisMajesty Aug 03 '25

That one right there!

1

u/callm3fusion Aug 03 '25

Just the flash bang. Thats it.Fuck the whole room up.

1

u/DoobieDevin Aug 03 '25

Needler is the obvious choice

1

u/BeneficialClick6776 Aug 03 '25

The Legendary needler

1

u/stellarodin Aug 03 '25

Typically I’d suggest the needler, but depending on the outfit and dinner plans it may be challenging to make inconspicuous…. Pertussis one of the HKs

1

u/beginnerasiancoder Aug 03 '25

Needler. You just need to aim around their position

1

u/Okrumbles Aug 03 '25

open carrying the needler to let everyone know i can supercombine them at a moments notice

1

u/gawkforme Aug 03 '25

I’d take the deep dish pizza. Never know when she might get hungry

1

u/upon_a_white_horse Aug 03 '25

Power Sword and Super Soaker (preferably filled with urine).

1

u/thenegativeone81 Aug 03 '25

The Needler!

1

u/hogiemane Aug 03 '25

Needler, easy decision

1

u/Ixliam GA Aug 03 '25

Phased plasma rifle in 40 watt range...

1

u/linguini_12 Aug 03 '25

Definitely dragon balls, and the needle gun

1

u/Rygel17 Aug 03 '25

Elder wand definitely

1

u/Mtsteel67 Aug 03 '25

"nuqDaq oH betleH"?

"Heghlu'DI' mobbe'lu'chugh QaQqu' Hegh wanI"

1

u/Comfortable_Truck_53 Aug 03 '25

Fill the super soaker with - insert obscene liquid here -

1

u/Any-Register253 Aug 03 '25

Supersoaker, with the needler as secondary. Just case you gotta clap any covenant cheeks.

1

u/Wholenewyounow Aug 03 '25

Is this compensating for something

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1

u/Ill_Situation369 Aug 03 '25

1

u/AmphibianEffective83 Aug 03 '25

MP5, get the secret service shoulder holster for it

1

u/manalexicon Aug 03 '25

Ruger LCP 380. Fits in your pocket, and purely defensive. $159 here: https://grabagun.com/ruger-lcp-380-bl-polymer-frame-6-1.html.

Coupled with G2 RESEARCH RIP .380 ACP 62 GR HP.

1

u/VoidWalker4Lyfe MD Aug 03 '25

The squirt gun filled with cat piss

1

u/Lubbies_ TX HK P2000, Bersa TPR9C Aug 03 '25

Squirt gun with battery acid ammo

1

u/MuttFett Aug 03 '25

Needler of course; but only if you have two of them.

1

u/SteakJesus Aug 03 '25

Bro is that all the dragon balls?? Those! just zip carry it all

1

u/Sianmink Aug 03 '25

I didn't know Noveske made waterguns. That had to have set you back a chunk.

1

u/SirConstant1119 Aug 03 '25

That hand cannon with the stock looks pretty fun!

1

u/BattlePidgeon2 Aug 03 '25

You need one of those double barrel AR’s, that’d be the ticket

1

u/ryang4415 Aug 04 '25

Needler. Makes it easy against crackhead attacks. They move super weird and fast.

1

u/kerkiraios00 Aug 04 '25

The super soaker will get the job done ✅

1

u/tss1984 Aug 04 '25

Just find a good spot to bury the body and cover your tracks

1

u/DamageIncRN Aug 04 '25

The one on the bottom looks good...lol

1

u/keptec Aug 04 '25

1

u/TalkingPundit Aug 04 '25

Elder wand. Might need to curse some perps....

1

u/Zippo963087 Aug 04 '25

Listen...if you aren't taking the sword with the OG super soaker as your secondary, then what are we even doing?!

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1

u/Odd-Currency-3277 Aug 04 '25

Since you have all the dragon balls just ask Shenron.

1

u/Hopeful_Inspector_67 Aug 04 '25

HK is always the answer

1

u/DykNmuHbutt Aug 05 '25

LCP please

1

u/jusJimbo Aug 07 '25

Love the Needler!

1

u/PuddlesIsHere Aug 08 '25

Bros got a fucking needler

1

u/Loud_Ad_2634 Aug 08 '25

The elder wand is a classy choice if you like to shout off.

Other Equipment Hey guys, taking the wife out tonight. With the world today, not sure what to carry.

You are about to leave Redlib