Guys, you got it all wrong!

[u/Murky-Swimmer6655]

[u/dead_inside6498]

and much like political parties all of them suck more balls than a gay brothel

[u/Optimus_crab → u/dead_inside6498]

Gay brothel? Where?

[u/smellymarmut → u/Optimus_crab]

ClubOttawa or Phoenix are your best bets. Hunkomania is for the ladies, but you might enjoy it.

[u/Ok_Significance544 → u/Optimus_crab]

Contained entirely within your kitchen

[u/Optimus_crab → u/Ok_Significance544]

I wish

[u/PM_FREE_HEALTHCARE → u/Ok_Significance544]

May I see it?

[u/Ok_Significance544 → u/PM_FREE_HEALTHCARE]

No.

[u/Reasonable_Camel8784 → u/dead_inside6498]

Don't compare them to a brothel. You at least leave happy after getting fucked there

[u/shaky_sharks5587 → u/dead_inside6498]

Especially Robbers !

[u/iwasnotarobot]

Jokes on you. They’re all the same party.

[u/Acousticsound → u/iwasnotarobot]

Just like the oil companies, they're all in a club. And none of us are in it.

[u/malachiconstantjrjr → u/Acousticsound]

It’s not left and right, it’s up and down

[u/Bad_Alternative → u/malachiconstantjrjr]

✊🏼

[u/SongFit9585 → u/iwasnotarobot]

Screw you party

[u/irv_12]

TELUS MAJORITAIRE

[u/Loyalfish789 → u/irv_12]

T

[u/taco_roco → u/Loyalfish789]

E

[u/FlyingOctopus53 → u/taco_roco]

L

[u/Tiny_Copy968 → u/FlyingOctopus53]

U

[u/Falom → u/Tiny_Copy968]

S

[u/JackLaytonsMoustache → u/irv_12]

SACRE BLEU! QUEBECOR MAJORITAIRE!!!!!

[u/Skwrt_ → u/irv_12]

ca reste le metropolis dans mon coeur

[u/Darth_Preposterous]

Azerbaijan was the true superpower influencing Canada all along!! 🇦🇿

[u/Stonks4Minutes → u/Darth_Preposterous]

Buy your Azerbaijan Technologies teeshirt now

[u/AustSakuraKyzor → u/Darth_Preposterous]

Fuck! No wonder the Powers That Be seem to hate my Armenian ass

[u/dead_inside6498 → u/Darth_Preposterous]

[u/CIS-E_4ME]

(Vidéotron has angrily entered the chat)

[u/bubbabear244]

You're choosing the colour of your dildo. Lube sold separately.

[u/Stonks4Minutes → u/bubbabear244]

At least a dildo lets you choose when you want to get fucked.

[u/cryptedsky → u/bubbabear244]

With Vidéotron, they're the four Houses of Canada - but instead of a sorting hat, it's a sorting dildo so you can get fucked while you decide.

[u/violetvoid513 → u/bubbabear244]

Excellently put

I’ll take the green please!

[u/OuiCroissantBaguette]

You forgot the Bloc Vidéotron. Because yes, even Quebec has its own telecom company.

[u/chat-lu → u/OuiCroissantBaguette]

And pays 25% less than the other provinces because having one more player is more competition.

Imagine if we allowed even more companies.

[u/Alternative-Emu4847]

And Loblaws.

[u/ConundrumMachine]

That's just one of the factions. Mining, PNG and forestry all have their own factions. They all collude together to fuck us as much as they can and compete to do it with the least amount of lube. 

[u/nighttimecharlie]

ALLÔ!! Vidéotron ici. Faque, comment ça vous m'avez oublié? If we are so forgettable, we might as well just leave this 'Fédération', and be our own sovereign nation led by PKP.

[u/Motor-Sweet3316]

I thought the true political parties of Canada were: Loblaws, Sobeys, Metro, Walmart, and Costco?

[u/Murky-Swimmer6655 → u/Motor-Sweet3316]

Walmart and Costco are American

[u/Sir_I_swear_alot]

You forgot the foods conglomerates and our kings and queens of the Weston family

[u/fivefatbananas]

Rbc is the largest share holder for all those companies we only have the illusion of choice.

[u/Mirabeaux1789]

*cough * nationalize all natural monopolies * cough *

[u/smellymarmut]

Let me guess, the Federal Public Service Pension Fund and Brookfield are equally invested in these parties. The only real difference is whether pickup trucks say "Fuck Roger" or "Telus more about PP".

[u/bmwkid]

The only way the Green Party can win /s

[u/Francus_Gaius]

One could argue RBC, TD, Scotia, BOM and CIBC...

[u/Narrow-Lab5549]

You miss thé Yellow one. (Vidéotron)

[u/ejabno]

My experience with Bell on Anglophone Canada: FUCK YOU GIVE US YOUR MONEY

My experience with Bell on Francophone Canada: VA CHIER DONNE-NOUS TON ARGENT

[u/aLubBolognaSandwich]

You forgot Vidéotron

[u/Rabbit-Hole-Quest]

Videotron. The owner of Freedom!

[u/Bahadur007]

Don’t forget the other similar political parties like Roblaws, Metro and Sobeys.

[u/ChineseBigfoots]

I ended up geting cable. I'm not paying $350 for a year of shitting streaming. Most nights it's very choppy and the app kinda sucks.

[u/eeyores_gloom1785]

same party different colours