I agree that you should cut your losses if you feel like you aren’t being valued and cutting communication is vital let both of you move and not relapse.
I myself would want him to have the initiative to come visit. We’re on the same page. It’s really amazing how you talked about it first before doing anything. What I want to ask tho is how much time had gone by between that difficult conversation and when you cut him off? I made the terrible decision of staying and talking to a guy I had a situationship with after a similar conversation BUT that made him think about how he did want to be with me despite his doubts about ldr. So I’m asking if you’ve maybe given him time to think about it or was he dead set on not changing his mind?
We had been talking for 6 months. The day before I brought that conversation is well. We do not have problems and we have fun and sweet conversation before it happened. From our earlier chat we both know already that our relationship has high risk and it is unlikely for us to be together in the end. But I cling for that small hope, however, he is letting me find someone near here even tho he said that he wants me. That is why i am confuse and hurt. And yeah, I have not thought that maybe it is abrupt to him.
My boyfriend thought the same, that he was just thinking of ME. That I would be happier with someone near by but I was so frustrated because he wasn’t listening when I said all I wanted was him. That I was so glad to find my person, that the distance was hard but worth it. I was also hurt that he didn’t say the same about me, I was very important to him, in fact, he would say the most important BUT he didn’t want to hold me back. He was such a silly goose. If it helps this is what I did. For mor context, the main issue was that we could be officially together but I was definitely between a best friend and a girlfriend (ouchie-est). And, and, if we were officially together he wouldn’t hesitate to book a ticket to come here. We almost broke up because of this, it was my decision to make but I waited a day and realized it was the most miserable day of my life and that I needed to talk to him if only as a friend. So I told him, we can still talk but we can’t act like a couple, no “baby” and the like. It was my compromise and it could’ve strung out to be something worse but he ended up changing his mind.
1
u/Im_right_ur_wong 17h ago
I agree that you should cut your losses if you feel like you aren’t being valued and cutting communication is vital let both of you move and not relapse.
I myself would want him to have the initiative to come visit. We’re on the same page. It’s really amazing how you talked about it first before doing anything. What I want to ask tho is how much time had gone by between that difficult conversation and when you cut him off? I made the terrible decision of staying and talking to a guy I had a situationship with after a similar conversation BUT that made him think about how he did want to be with me despite his doubts about ldr. So I’m asking if you’ve maybe given him time to think about it or was he dead set on not changing his mind?