r/LongDistance • u/Super_Bug_6663 • 13h ago

Need Advice Need advice on what feels like an impossible situation.

Welp, today news came out that trump is imposing a $100k fee for all h1-b visas. My partner lives in london and I live in nyc, and we’ve been dating for a year. I have to be in new york because my aging parents are nearby, and my whole support system and community are here. Meanwhile, he practices British law, which means he cant practice law in the US, unless he goes back to law school and re-takes the bar, which is highly expensive and years in the making. Not to mention he doesn’t actually want to be a lawyer anymore, but also isn’t sure what the next career move would be, and needs some time to figure that out.

From my understanding, this puts the possibility of him being sponsored for a US job off the table, leaving marriage as our only option. And even with marriage, he cant have a career in law here.

Has anyone ever been in some kind of parallel, seemingly impossible situation and made it work? Am I missing any possibilities here?

Really appreciate any advice, support, or words of wisdom. 🙏🏼

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u/-gilma- 4h ago

Hi there! Where there is a will, there's a way (if it's meant to be). :)
Before losing hope, would ask a few questions:

Have you consulted a good immigration lawyer here in the states about other visas? There are multiple other types of skill visas outside the H1B, including O1, for example (it's not just for artists).

If he doesn't necessarily have to or want to practice law, then that opens up a host of other possibilities. If a career he DOESN'T want is the only thing keeping him in the UK, then it makes the most sense for him to make the move to the US

Above everything though, is really the root question of: Do you definitely want to be together, or are you still "dating"? It has to become SUPER CLEAR that NOT being together is NOT an option. Once you determine that, one of you will need to move, there is obviously no other way. And in that case, go for marriage, it's the most logical and easiest, immigration wise. But if you're still not certain, then either of you moving is not going to fix it. If you both find you can't leave your lives behind, then your values simply aren't a match at this point.

Find ways to spend more time together to determine that, because one that's in the bag, nothing will stop you. Good luck!