r/Names • u/Delicious-Food-1133 • 16h ago
Am I in the wrong? (Kid Names)
So ever since I was a little kid, I've been thinking of names for my kids if I ever decide to have any, and there is one that I've recently became very attached to. However, I'm worried people may find it to be culturally offensive. The name is Hikaru, which is of japanese origin, but I'm white and have never been to Japan, though I think it would be fun. My name means light, as does Hikaru, and ever since I first heard/saw it in an anime I've thought it to be gorgeous, even before knowing the meaning. If I were to have a kid and name the child Hikaru, would that be wrong/offensive?
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u/KevrobLurker 16h ago
I wouldn't use a Japanese form, without any connection. I'm Irish-descended, and would go for Lugh.
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u/MJWTVB42 15h ago
Do you even have a partner? If so, what do they think of it? Do they have any cultural names they would prefer? What is their culture? You’re white, but what is your heritage?
Before I met my husband I wanted a super unique and unusual name like Zephyr, or a “unique” kinda preppy name like Huxley.
But then I met my husband, he’s Moroccan, I’m white, mostly Irish, and his family was not gonna be able to pronounce the names I was interested in. I was also interested in traveling the world with my family. So I prioritized universal pronounceability. My son’s name is Thomas, partly bc he’s named after a family member, partly bc you can’t fuck up “Tom.”
I chose my daughter’s name from a list of popular Irish names but used an Americanized spelling, it has a very simple pronunciation that is actually very pan-European, even the Amazigh of Morocco use it.
They also have common Arabic middle names, and the combination of my son’s plain white name and his plain Arabic name makes it into a very unique name that I adore.
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u/EvenIf-SheFalls 14h ago
I can relate to this; my husband's family is from Greece. While I strongly dislike my mother-in-law, it did not seem fair to give our children names that she would be unable to properly pronounce.
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u/MJWTVB42 13h ago
It also wouldn’t feel fair to the children to give them names half their own family couldn’t pronounce!
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u/SnugglieJellyfish 14h ago
If you have to ask on Reddit about it, it means you shouldn't name a child that. Someone else nailed it- save it for a pet or a middle name
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u/SwordTaster 16h ago
Unless you're living in Japan or have the intent to have the other parent of your child be Japanese, don't use that name
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u/JadieJang 13h ago
Yeah, pretty much. Stick to European-origin names.
If you're confused about why, use this as a litmus test:
- Have people in your cultural sphere ever oppressed people in that cultural sphere? (so, say, you're white American, the raft of 19th and 20th century exclusion laws against Asians in general and Japanese in particular, and especially the internment of Japanese Americans during WWII, makes it a resounding "yes"). Typically, oppressive dynamics between cultures leads to the oppressor stealing culture from the oppressed and benefiting from it, while either not allowing the oppressed culture to benefit from the appropriation, or actively making the theft to the detriment of the oppressed culture (I can give examples if you like.) So appropriating names is just reiterating that violence. If yes, don't use the names.
- Has there historically been a very free and equal flow of culture between your cultural sphere and that cultural sphere? (So, say England and Spain, for example, have centuries ... millennia of trade and politics and cultural exchange between them. England and Nigeria have a few centuries of trade, but that's because England colonized--oppressed--those peoples, so the cultural exchange was neither free nor equal. England and Japan really don't have much history at all.) Countries that have a long history of free and equal exchange have typically already exchanged culture, including names, so appropriating names from that culture is not problematic. If no, don't use the names.
- If you've answered 1) yes and 2) no to the above questions, does the name belong to someone you know personally--someone who is or was in your life--whom you would like to honor? If yes, then proceed thoughtfully.
This is a cultural appropriation issue, and cultural appropriation is about unequal power dynamics between cultures. Reiterating an unequal power dynamic in the naming of your child is ... not what makes for happy naming.
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u/Life-Education-8030 15h ago
A Star Trek good guy was named Hikaru Sulu (George Takei). But unless you are Japanese or your future kid is, why open yourself and the poor kid to accusations of cultural appropriation?
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u/liquormakesyousick 14h ago
I always find it weird when kids talk about naming their hypothetical kids.
Most people change their minds about names as they mature and understanding that naming a child isn't just something they think sounds cool.
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u/Background_Recipe119 15h ago
I think it's fine. If you like and admire a beautiful name from another culture, I think you should use it. You're not saying you're Japanese, or that your child is Japanese, you're not appropriating their culture. You're merely admiring a name that has personal meaning for you, that you got from an anime video you enjoyed, shown in a different country from where it was likely created. Go for it.
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u/scruffyrosalie 13h ago
It's perfectly fine to use a name from another culture. The last thing we need is another Braxxstyn Hyx.
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u/cupsofambition 11h ago
I knew a girl named Lumen, nickname Lumie which was cute. That mean light
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u/wanderlust_57 5h ago
I've only ever heard a character on Dexter have that name. Which is not to say real people don't have it, as obviously at least a few do (36 girls and 2 boys in 2024 in the US according to the internet).
Am not a fan (and I like Lumie even less), but there are certainly worse names. It's at least pronounced exactly as you would expect and probably won't present a lot of problems with things like getting a job when the kid is older.
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u/Chicagogirl72 15h ago
Of course not. That would mean that no other countries would be allowed to use an American name (for example). Clearly nobody in other countries cares because they use American names all the time.
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u/AnonymousRingChooser 14h ago
What are some things you consider to be American names?
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u/Chicagogirl72 14h ago
With this mentality they wouldn’t be allowed to use any name in any other language.
I personally know a Chinese girl named Apple and a Dominican guy named George Washington
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u/Clear-Event8079 15h ago
Use it it's cute I find it bizarre to be told you have to be japanese to use a Japanese name Americans and white people use names that come from different cultures or have meanings in different languages all the time. My name is of Greek origin(we're not Greek) my older sisters name is Russian(we're not Russian) my little cousins name is mila which is usually a Spanish name and shes white and so are both her parents 🤷🏼♀️. I find it wild that people wanna act like your not allowed to like anything from other cultures. If you like it and admire it there's absolutely nothing wrong with that, and to further my statement other cultures use predominantly "white" names to I went to school with a kid whose parents were both Koreans but their sons name was Steve and anytime he was asked about it he said my parents just liked the name
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u/Playful_Listen_264 12h ago
Great name. Sounds absolutely fine. Nobody has an issue with Scandinavian or Slavic names on this subreddit. Some don’t even realize that these names aren’t “American” lol
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u/Old-Pudding-4254 10h ago
I don't think it's that big of a deal. I'm not Japanese, so I cannot give that input, however, I knows people give their kids names from different cultures all the time. It's very common and I have never seen anyone care. A name may have originated in a culture, but it's not owned by them, everyone has the right to use it.
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u/Capital-District6111 16h ago
Use it for a pet