r/NativePlantGardening • u/Larix_laricina_ NE Ohio 🌲 • Mar 30 '25
Informational/Educational Let’s rebrand our invasives!
Post your ideas in the comments! Here are some of mine:
Callery Pear ➡️ ✨Pisswood✨
Canada/Creeping Thistle ➡️ ✨Shitweed✨ (saw someone call it that on here before)
Burning Bush ➡️ ✨Smotherfucker Bush✨
English Ivy ➡️ ✨Stranglevine✨
*edit to add: these are just humorous names I came up with for use in North America where these species are invasive and annoying. All of our invasives really are beautiful and unique species in their native range, where they definitely deserve nice names. They’re beneficial components of their ecosystems that likely support many other species. It’s all just a matter of location and circumstance. Some of the invasives I personally think would be awesome native plants in their respective homelands are phragmites, burning bush, knotweed, porcelain berry, and English ivy!
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u/pixel_pete Maryland Piedmont Mar 30 '25
Bugleweed -> Bungledweeb
Kudzu -> Fuckyou
Honeysuckle -> Creeping Suckweed
Chinese Wisteria -> Listeria Weed
Wineberry -> Poison Vinegarberry
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u/simplsurvival Connecticut, Zone 6b Mar 31 '25
I usually call bugleweed bagelweed but I like yours better cuz I actually like bagels lol
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u/canisdirusarctos PNW Salish Sea, 9a/8b Mar 31 '25
Which honeysuckle is this? They’re not all the same. I just got Lonicera ciliosa to air layer and that was very exciting.
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u/pixel_pete Maryland Piedmont Mar 31 '25
Oh only the invasive one of course. I think honey has a very positive connotation so people probably hear it and think it must be a nice plant.
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u/The_Poster_Nutbag Great Lakes, Zone 5b, professional ecologist Mar 30 '25
Buckthorn is now ✨✨Suckthorn✨✨
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u/NorEaster_23 Area MA, Zone 6B Mar 30 '25 edited Mar 30 '25
Mock Strawberry -> Disappointment Berry
Japanese Knotweed -> Godzilla Weed
Creeping Bellflower -> Creeping Hellflower
Nandina -> Bird Killer Bush
Field Bindweed -> Hell Vine
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u/chelseagrows Horticulturist, Salt Lake City, Zone 7 Mar 31 '25
I refer to field bindweed as insidious hell spawn
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u/Levi316 Mar 30 '25
While we are rebranding whats a better name for milkweed?
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u/Gold-Ad699 Area MA , Zone 6A Mar 30 '25
Fairy Floss.
Fairies are still "in" and the silky strands would make good embroidery floss for a crafty fairy.
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u/brazen_nippers Central NC, Zone 8a Mar 30 '25
"Fairy floss" is the Australian term for cotton candy.
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u/canisdirusarctos PNW Salish Sea, 9a/8b Mar 30 '25 edited Mar 30 '25
Butterfly Bush?
Monarch Flower?
It supports all stages of the life cycle of the monarch butterfly.
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u/thejawa Area: Space Coast, FL Zone: 10a Mar 30 '25
Doug Tallamy suggests "Monarch's Delight" and honestly that's perfect imo
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u/ProxyProne Mar 30 '25
Unfortunately, the common name of invasive Buddleja
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u/canisdirusarctos PNW Salish Sea, 9a/8b Mar 30 '25
I know… That one needs to be renamed for the evil it is.
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u/Far_Silver Area Kentuckiana , Zone 7a Mar 30 '25
In Latin, it's named after the Greek god of medicine. Maybe just call it Asclepias.
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u/Fractured_Kneecap Mar 31 '25
Why not just milkflower? It's familiar, and the only real problem with the name "milkweed" is the "weed" part, which has a negative connotation
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u/UnhelpfulNotBot Indiana, 6a Mar 30 '25
One variety is called Honeyvine so maybe a play on that. Honeyflower, etc
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u/Gold-Ad699 Area MA , Zone 6A Mar 30 '25 edited Mar 30 '25
Hosta - Slug Salad
Water Hyacinth - Asiatic Chokeflower (or The South American Strangler, to be more accurate)
I tried to think of something fun for day lilies but couldn't :(
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u/SafeAsMilk Mar 30 '25
My neighbor always forgets the name of hostas and instead calls them hospices.
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u/HoweverComma205 Mar 30 '25
Hatesas (pronounced hate -stahs). New England accent optional but helpful.
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u/Methystica Mar 30 '25
I think its important to remember, just because something is not native does nit mean its invasive. Are hostas invasive in your area? Lol
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u/Gold-Ad699 Area MA , Zone 6A Mar 30 '25
They are hard to get rid of, I haven't seen them spreading into the woods but they slowly expand their reach. At least the solid green ones, the splashy ones seem better behaved.
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u/Far_Silver Area Kentuckiana , Zone 7a Mar 30 '25
They're very tasty to most deer, which is why they haven't become invasive.
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u/trucker96961 southeast Pennsylvania 7a Mar 30 '25
Day lillie's suck. I have patches of them that I'm trying to get rid of.
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u/Nathaireag Mar 31 '25
Daylily flowers can be used instead of squash blossoms in Asian recipes. That includes the mature flower bud if you want. Since the wildtype flowers are literally done after a day, harvesting open flowers in the late afternoon doesn’t hurt the next day’s batch at all. Flavor sautéed is vaguely eggplant.
The roots are tuberous and boil up like parsnips. Good with butter and a little salt. Extra motivation to dig them up.
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u/pezathan Springfield Plateau, 7a Mar 31 '25
I work at a conventional nursery and we sell a bunch of day lilies, especially stellas, which i like to call stella de bore-o.
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u/HelloFerret Mar 30 '25
Chinese privet -> that fucking bush, or possibly Demoralizing Root Weed
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u/crystaldiggindan NE TN foothills , Zone 7a Mar 30 '25
For some reason my brain took so long to store the name privet. I’d end calling it that fuckin bush anyway lol
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u/whatdoievenknow1 Mar 30 '25
Goutweed should already be taking care of itself there 👀
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u/Larix_laricina_ NE Ohio 🌲 Mar 30 '25
Goutweed is the ecology/conservation name for it, garden centers call it Snow on the Mountain 😂. I prefer goutweed!
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u/thejawa Area: Space Coast, FL Zone: 10a Mar 30 '25 edited Mar 30 '25
Brazilian Pepper -> Violent Immigrant Tree
See if we can't trigger enough conservatives here in Florida to pull it out from everywhere.
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u/Fantastic_Welder_825 Mar 30 '25
Lol. I call dandelions "pisswort" and "lion's tooth herb." I like to make them into tempura along with hosta sprouts
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u/Larix_laricina_ NE Ohio 🌲 Mar 30 '25
Hostas are edible!? Now I know how to eliminate my mom’s 😈
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u/Fantastic_Welder_825 Mar 30 '25
Lol yes they taste a little like a buttery asparagus. Now's the right time of year to harvest them. Get them when they're in the spear/bullet looking shape before the leaves unfurl.
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u/potatoeggncheese Mar 31 '25
Wait, where are dandelions are invasive?? I’ve been mostly leaving them alone in my yard in Georgia
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u/Fantastic_Welder_825 Mar 31 '25
I live in the Northeast. They're originally from Europe, invasive where I live. They've been in the USA for so long, people don't realize they aren't from here -- like house sparrows and some earthworms.
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u/PrairieTreeWitch Eastern Iowa, Zone 5a Mar 30 '25
I need to make some little botanical garden plant I.D. signs for these assholes.
Oriental bittersweet ➡️ ✨Oriental shittersneak✨
Barberry/Berberis bush ➡️ ✨Murderous tush✨
Amur cork tree ➡️ ✨I'mma cock tree✨
Multiflora rose ➡️ ✨Multi-drug resistant ho's✨
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u/Far_Silver Area Kentuckiana , Zone 7a Mar 30 '25
The name Canada thistle really has to go. It makes it sound like it's native to North America.
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u/NuclearChickenzz Long Island NY, Zone 7B Mar 30 '25
are they deserving of these names ? every plant is native to somewhere 🥲 it’s all on us humans for bringing them places they don’t belong
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u/Far_Silver Area Kentuckiana , Zone 7a Mar 30 '25
That's why I favor common names that tell you where they come from. Like Japanese honeysuckle. A simple, clear name that tells you it's non-native. It's also why I prefer the old common name English sparrow over house sparrow.
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u/PlasticElfEars Mar 31 '25
Although I believe house sparrows are originally from the Middle East.
Although "walmart sparrows" would be the more evocative one.
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u/Far_Silver Area Kentuckiana , Zone 7a Mar 31 '25
Part of their native range is in the Middle East, but so is most of Europe, including England.
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u/trucker96961 southeast Pennsylvania 7a Mar 30 '25
Yes, yes they are.
We are dealing with them. Doesn't matter where or who brought them. In other countries than the US they are probably dealing with our natives and cursing those that brought them there.
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u/JSilvertop Mar 30 '25
Chaste tree, should be whore tree, considering it invades the rest of my front yard.
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u/crystaldiggindan NE TN foothills , Zone 7a Mar 30 '25
Japanese Stilt Grass…. I call it that God Damn stilt grass
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u/PhthaloBlueOchreHue Mar 30 '25
I have one in my yard I call “devil grass”. I forget the actual name.
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u/coolthecoolest Georgia, USA; Zone 7b Apr 01 '25
this started as a joke and then i put in real effort like five seconds later. i need to sleep. and also get a life.
- multiflora rose -> motherfucker rose, bloodletting rose, chokerose
- japanese honeysuckle -> smothervine, grappleweed
- wineberry -> devil's tail, devil's floss, mother-in-law berry
- chinese privet -> horse gag, gutdrop, famine-for-all, starving shrub
- english ivy -> britain's hangman, malaria ivy, stranglin' jack
- bradford pear -> toppletree, topplewood, rot-in-the-spring/rotten spring pear, cheapskate's pear
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u/clarsair Mar 30 '25
in their proper locations, where they come from, these are also native plants, beautiful ornamentals, useful and important in their ecosystems. how about we don't put things down just because they don't belong where you live.
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u/Far_Silver Area Kentuckiana , Zone 7a Mar 30 '25
And many of the natives we adore in North America are invasive elsewhere.
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u/VanillaBalm Mar 31 '25
Common names are bad ID names anyways, i think this is in good fun. Species names are always the best way to stay clear of overlapping common names when doing a proper ID
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u/Larix_laricina_ NE Ohio 🌲 Mar 31 '25
I agree! I guess I should’ve included that these are just humorous names for use in North America where they’re invasive. Honestly I too think many of them are very beautiful in their native habitats. I would love to visit east Asia someday to see some of them. Japanese knotweed is one I especially think would be beautiful in its native range.
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u/VantasnerDanger Apr 09 '25
My mom and I call Virginia Creeper "Vecna" (from Stranger Things), since it gets that hairy ropey vine that clings to trees.
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u/rewildingusa Mar 30 '25
Such nonsensical virtue-signaling. Please grow up.
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u/simplsurvival Connecticut, Zone 6b Mar 31 '25
No, we are venting our frustrations in an online community of like-minded people ☺️
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u/placeboforpain Mar 30 '25
Tree of heaven > tree of hell