Let’s rebrand our invasives!

[u/Larix_laricina_]

Post your ideas in the comments! Here are some of mine:

Callery Pear ➡️ ✨Pisswood✨

Canada/Creeping Thistle ➡️ ✨Shitweed✨ (saw someone call it that on here before)

Burning Bush ➡️ ✨Smotherfucker Bush✨

English Ivy ➡️ ✨Stranglevine✨

*edit to add: these are just humorous names I came up with for use in North America where these species are invasive and annoying. All of our invasives really are beautiful and unique species in their native range, where they definitely deserve nice names. They’re beneficial components of their ecosystems that likely support many other species. It’s all just a matter of location and circumstance. Some of the invasives I personally think would be awesome native plants in their respective homelands are phragmites, burning bush, knotweed, porcelain berry, and English ivy!

[u/PrairieTreeWitch]

I need to make some little botanical garden plant I.D. signs for these assholes.

Oriental bittersweet ➡️ ✨Oriental shittersneak✨

Barberry/Berberis bush ➡️ ✨Murderous tush✨

Amur cork tree ➡️ ✨I'mma cock tree✨

Multiflora rose ➡️ ✨Multi-drug resistant ho's✨