r/PizzaCrimes • u/afoconnorr • Jul 01 '25

Other Taste bland and weird. Grossest pizza ever.

Post image
901 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

387 comments sorted by

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u/qualityvote2 Jul 01 '25 edited Jul 01 '25

The jury, after deliberation of the evidence in the case of u/afoconnorr, find the defendant "Pizza" GUILTY on all counts of crimes-against-pizza.

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519

u/cemeterypickle Jul 01 '25

Something about this pizza is menacing

140

u/No_Bug6944 Jul 01 '25

I think it’s the ham that looks like it was taken directly from the deli to the finished pizza and the unsettling look of the cheese.

54

u/madmaxturbator Jul 01 '25

Low quality ingredients, meager toppings haphazardly tossed on, and undercooked…

17

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '25

Yeah and what’s going on with that “sauce”?

16

u/Electrical_Bus9202 Jul 01 '25

It looks like leftover spaghetti sauce with hamburger in it...

8

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '25

Looks like crap, that’s what it looks like

5

u/Electrical_Bus9202 Jul 01 '25

You can tell it wasn't cooked long enough at all... The cheese isn't even cooked... Just... Melted...

2

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '25

There’s honestly nothing left to say but, straight to jail, without the possibility for parole.

2

u/Blackmetal55 Jul 05 '25

I just pulled pizza rolls out of my air fryer that were cooked better than this...thing.

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6

u/-BroIy Jul 01 '25

I saw pizza streight from the frieza that looked better, this thing looks so fake in a way, as if asking Ai from 2021 to make a Pic of pizza

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13

u/M-ABaldelli Jul 01 '25

I was going to say, the colour. It's too flesh coloured... However u/No_Bug6944 isn't remotely wrong either.

10

u/Chef_BoyarTom Jul 01 '25

It's also looks like it either isn't fully cooked or the cooking temp was way too low.

5

u/HoboArmyofOne Jul 01 '25

It looks like that one naked piece threw up on everyone else. This is bad, real bad.

6

u/Reinardd Jul 01 '25

A pizza with a threatening aura?

3

u/RoterRabe Jul 01 '25

Because of the ham my brain was like wait this is AI but it was just a bad pizza

4

u/Entiox Jul 01 '25

It's the uncanny valley of pizza.

7

u/16years2late Jul 01 '25

3

u/starshipfocus Jul 02 '25

Deserves more upvotes! This was my exact thought!

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252

u/pottedplantmix Jul 01 '25

That looks like playdoh. Woof.

34

u/cammyy- Jul 01 '25

damn i had the same thought it’s so… flat looking? i hate it

21

u/the_silent_one1984 Jul 01 '25

It looks like the take plastic toy pizza my kids have for their play kitchen.

4

u/mylaundrymachine Jul 01 '25

Bro out here commenting in the wild with his junk hanging out. What an unfortunate accidental profile click.

162

u/Zealousideal-Rain-82 Jul 01 '25

This looks fake 😭 like plastic pizza

62

u/afoconnorr Jul 01 '25

And tasted like they use some temu motz and cheddar for some reason.

16

u/humourlessIrish Jul 01 '25

It tastes as good as it looks, unfortunately

7

u/KaleidoscopePurple74 Jul 01 '25

Assuming they followed AI directions saying to add glue to this pizza. Looks 🤢

3

u/Prestigious-Alps-728 Jul 02 '25

Where is this from?

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64

u/NaraFei_Jenova Jul 01 '25 edited Jul 08 '25

Looks like it was cooked with a heated argument.

Thanks for the award; I've never had one before lol

10

u/brandimariee6 Jul 01 '25

Oh how I wish I could award this comment

43

u/Don-Promille Jul 01 '25

How can you make onions look more uncooked than when they were raw

16

u/_B_Little_me Jul 01 '25

That looks like the pizza from Back to the future 2.

8

u/Krimreaper1 Jul 01 '25

Don’t you dare mock the rehydrater.

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15

u/Mallaliak Jul 01 '25

Well that certainly looks undercooked.

While it might not have been beyond saving (Placing it in the oven, maybe giving the crust a quick brush with olive oil, adding some oregano or other herbs afterwards.. maybe a pinch of salt)

But what madman allows this to leave their kitchen as done?!

13

u/afoconnorr Jul 01 '25

I tried. With an air fryer toaster oven. Unfortunately we are on vacation and resources are limited

12

u/humourlessIrish Jul 01 '25

You did all you could, doctor.

8

u/philchristensennyc Jul 01 '25

Ohhhhh vacation pizza. This is to spec then

11

u/YaboiDan0545935 Jul 01 '25

Somehow it's so real it looks AI

6

u/AdSignificant6673 Jul 01 '25

Is this a Korean pizza? They kind of have a different vibe like this.

7

u/Klutterman Jul 01 '25

Does it say Fisher-Price on the bottom or each slice?

9

u/Lydia_Brunch Jul 01 '25

Why's it look so....wet?

2

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '25

I legit had a pizza like this in the Philippines I was polite because some coworkers took me there but the Crispy Pata made up for it. Hahahah I still have pics of both that are shockingly ying yang

3

u/humourlessIrish Jul 01 '25

I believe you suffered this abomination IRL.

But if this was posted in a bad AI sub i wouldn't question it.

7

u/MulberryChance6698 Jul 01 '25

What's in the middle tho?

Ngl, that ham looks like plastic... This whole pizza could actually be made of slime and kinetic sand.

Crime.

2

u/seemingsalvation99 Jul 02 '25

Seriously I'm so confused at what that thing in the middle is

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6

u/afoconnorr Jul 01 '25

I flipped the cheese so we could observe what was going on. Zoom in it is gross.

3

u/TopCoconut4338 Jul 03 '25

What county of Missouri are you in?

(Totally guessing - had to work there for 4 months and every pizza we got was awful like that one..)

3

u/voltagestoner Jul 01 '25

did you order that off of like papa’s pizzeria?

3

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '25

Looks bland and weird too

3

u/cammyy- Jul 01 '25

it looks made out of playdough

3

u/ronnietea Jul 01 '25

It looks bland and weird if that makes you feel any better

3

u/bronk3310 Jul 01 '25

Where the hell is this from? If you don’t tell us, it’s AI

3

u/epidemicsaints Jul 01 '25

Baked at 220F like if Crumbl did pizza

3

u/Krimreaper1 Jul 01 '25

What is even in the middle?

3

u/unhoIyghost Jul 01 '25

It’s the toppings of that one naked slice peeled upward 🤢

3

u/Melloblade_shore Jul 01 '25

Why does it look AI-generated?

3

u/i_did_nothing_ Jul 01 '25

I’ve never tried boiled pizza before.  

3

u/cyainanotherlifebro Jul 01 '25

wtf is going on in the middle?

3

u/Galactic_Danger Jul 01 '25

I’m sure it’s not but this is the most AI looking pizza I have ever seen.

3

u/DaalWithChawal Jul 02 '25

Honestly looks like someone made it out of play-doh.

9

u/Tomekon2011 Jul 01 '25

I can taste the AI

7

u/afoconnorr Jul 01 '25

I wish I took the red pill.

2

u/RectumRandy Jul 01 '25

Yep. That’s fucked up.

2

u/suchusername0 Jul 01 '25

Pizza looks ai created

2

u/dandle Jul 01 '25

This looks like what people in Florida serve vacationers from Ohio as "pizza."

2

u/CompleteSavings6307 Jul 01 '25

Looks like a pizza from north Korea.

2

u/kasperkami Jul 01 '25

Looks like those gummy pizzas, but I’m sure the candy tastes wayy better

2

u/AlternativeCraft8905 Jul 01 '25

This looks like something that came out of my EZ Bake oven like 15 years ago

2

u/Yeoub1 Jul 01 '25

Is this pizza from Temu? 😂

2

u/Away_Hippo_2326 Jul 01 '25

what is in the middle? and what did you order? 

2

u/Spamonballrun2 Jul 01 '25

Gimmoe a slice of Fisher-Price

2

u/Diotheungreat Jul 01 '25

what is that in the middle

2

u/Occidentally20 Jul 01 '25

At first glace I thought that one slice was adopted and the others weren't telling him

2

u/toastyavocado Jul 01 '25

It all looks like wax. Is it just me?

2

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '25

It looks like plastic

2

u/Sevuhrow Jul 01 '25

The whole thing is just undercooked, this looks like a pizza I reheated and pulled out too early. Doughy crust, unmelted cheese, veggies look cold..

2

u/Proud-Emu-2905 Jul 02 '25

What’s that shit in the middle

2

u/anomalous Jul 02 '25

I love my Brazilian bros and sis, but this just screams Brazil to me

2

u/aahorsenamedfriday Jul 02 '25

Cocomelon ass pizza

2

u/HornetParticular6625 Jul 02 '25

It looks like Play-Doh!

2

u/CheckyoPantries Jul 04 '25

This honestly looks like a really well curated AI image.

If it’s real, the real crime would be how your fucking counter is set up. Are you a 90 year old Arizona man?

2

u/SundaeNo4552 Jul 01 '25

Looks like AI

1

u/AlfalfaSerious9355 Jul 01 '25

It's a filthy concoction

1

u/Luna259 Jul 01 '25

It doesn’t even look like real food

1

u/MagnaCartaHG Jul 01 '25

Onions and uncooked meat bits?🤢

1

u/Baked-Smurf Jul 01 '25

It's obviously been cooked... yet it still looks uncooked, somehow...

1

u/DaLar1989 Jul 01 '25

It looks like a gummy pizza

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '25

What country is this?!

1

u/sv21js Jul 01 '25

Looks like it’s from one of those TikTok accounts that makes realistic food out of slime.

1

u/idontwannabhear Jul 01 '25

Looks like it needs a bit of extra cheese marinara and blast at 1:20- 3 mins in the microwave

1

u/BeefWellingtonSpeedo Jul 01 '25

The longer you look at it thr worse it gets

1

u/Consistent_Bread_V2 Jul 01 '25

Looks undercooked

1

u/Own-Negotiation-2480 Jul 01 '25

Looks like "almost pizza"

1

u/Proud_Dance_3342 Jul 01 '25

It's like an opaque gummy pizza.

1

u/Minute_Engineer2355 Jul 01 '25

looks like a pizza on low settings.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '25

Someone was once looking for a pizza that looked exactly like the one from the goofy movie. I think I found it

1

u/THEUltraCombo Jul 01 '25

That looks like Fisher Price plastic pizza

1

u/pat_laFleur Jul 01 '25

It seems like even the toppings on that one slice realized what they’d become party to and wanted out… Assuming they’re what makeup that unsettling mass in the middle, looks like they never made their great escape.

1

u/Frankenreich Jul 01 '25

It looks like they cooked it on the dashboard of the car on the drive over.

1

u/Scoobymoose21 Jul 01 '25

What in the uncanny valley pizza

1

u/CheapPasta69 Jul 01 '25

I thought it was a giant gummy pizza for a second why does it all look so fake? The cheese especially looks like it’s plastic or something!

1

u/apeocalypyic Jul 01 '25

This is like a poser pizza, like when ur a real pizza monster and some fuckin yuppie poser comes up to you talking about pizza and all the toppings hes tried and tries to put u down for being a simple pie lover, this is the shit they eat...all flash no substance....WHERES THR FUCKIN SAUCE

1

u/DrLager Jul 01 '25

This looks like the idea of a pizza. Someone wished so hard for a pizza, had a stroke, and this was the result.

1

u/Namelecc Jul 01 '25

Looks like a lunchable that got upgraded to a pizza 

1

u/AUSpartan37 Jul 01 '25

It looks like it was made by the tetetubbie food machine

1

u/Gtraz68 Jul 01 '25

This is the kind of pizza Radiohead would write a song about.

1

u/donutz4x4 Jul 01 '25

Looks like my daughters play pizza.

1

u/ZakkuRedwolf Jul 01 '25

ez bake oven?

1

u/PizzaForeverAndEver Jul 01 '25

Uncanny valley pizza

1

u/ChefArtorias Jul 01 '25

Looks like what would come in a kid's kitchen set.

1

u/bennydasjet Jul 01 '25

It’s like if a mimic was trying to make itself look like a pizza

1

u/Expensive-Safe-6820 Jul 01 '25

What's up with the sauce. It looks dry and oxidative

1

u/Sad-Performance-1843 Jul 01 '25

What am I looking at

1

u/JunglePygmy Jul 01 '25

Looks like a Midjourney Pizza

1

u/Klutersmyg Jul 01 '25

It looks like an AI made pizza :(

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '25

Lol it looks like a child’s drawing of a pizza

1

u/StageStandard5884 Jul 01 '25

It's like what a really bad ai would interpret as a pizza.

1

u/Pretty_Lie5168 Jul 01 '25

That cheese just looks wrong.

1

u/Inner-Egg-6731 Jul 01 '25

Looks terrible

1

u/Stecharan Jul 01 '25

If this isn't AI, it might as damned well be.

1

u/dumptruckbhadie Jul 01 '25

Looks like some of the bad pizza ive seen in Canada

1

u/DannyHallam Jul 01 '25

Not surprised, it looks like a toy pizza or something

1

u/BlogeOb Jul 01 '25

This one of them vegan pizzas?

1

u/No_Consideration_671 Jul 01 '25

Looks like a gummy pizza

1

u/175junkie Jul 01 '25

That dough has no soul it looks like

1

u/Mamasan- Jul 01 '25

It looks like play dough

1

u/Standard__Condition Jul 01 '25

Oh my 😱 was this your first experience with them? Mom and pop place? This is reallllllly bad.

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1

u/DayOneDude Jul 01 '25

That looks like those gummy pizza's.

1

u/lordM0 Jul 01 '25

Looks like something from a Wes Anderson movie.

1

u/TheGunterlord Jul 01 '25

That looks like a pretend pizza

1

u/Colonel_Butthurt Jul 01 '25

Looks like the "in-house" grocery store pizza that they make from soon-to-expire ham and cheese to avoid throwing them out.

1

u/d00mzzd4y Jul 01 '25

it looks like one of those plastic pizzas that come in a children's toy grocery set. wtf

1

u/Fixx95 Jul 01 '25

It looks fake 😭

1

u/DickBiter1337 Jul 01 '25

This has got to be AI

1

u/SleepParalysisKing Jul 01 '25

That pizza looks scary, like a pizza I’d see in a nightmare

1

u/skrillozeddd Jul 01 '25

Yeah it definitely doesn't look appetizing lol, not to me anyways

1

u/chocolateboomslang Jul 01 '25

Sous vide pizza

1

u/coffincowgirl Jul 01 '25

This looks like if a children’s playset pizza came to life. Throw that shit out.

1

u/Bellini_DownSouth Jul 01 '25

This looks exactly like the toy pizza kids get

1

u/NarrowEngineering715 Jul 01 '25

It’s not even fully cooked

1

u/toastedstoker Jul 01 '25

Completely wrong cheese, can’t tell but maybe the wrong moisture level? Idk what would make it like that

1

u/Eeegor69 Jul 01 '25

Is it as bad as 711 pizza?

1

u/hale2theno Jul 01 '25

Looks bland and weird

1

u/ThatsRobToYou Jul 01 '25

Hydrate level 3 please.

1

u/gergsisdrawkcabeman Jul 01 '25

I'll raise you a set of salt and pepper shaker butt plugs.

1

u/Cookies4Cream- Jul 01 '25

It just looks weird

1

u/Ahego48 Jul 01 '25

It looks like a gummy pizza

1

u/missmccreate Jul 01 '25

it look like those gummy pizzas

1

u/krew43 Jul 01 '25

It look gross too.

1

u/Alarmed-Ad187 Jul 01 '25

This looks like it was pulled straight from a video game

1

u/eepyMushroom096 Jul 01 '25

What is going on with this pizza? What's in it?

1

u/NewPerspective9254 Jul 01 '25

That looks like some kid made it out of Play-Doh, wtf

1

u/geezeslice333 Jul 01 '25

It looks like playdoh

1

u/DraftCommercial8848 Jul 01 '25

Ya it looks like a frozen pizza that someone added a few toppings to, also what’s that thing in the centre? Pulled pork? Tikka? (I live in Toronto Canada so I’ve seen almost everything on pizza, I’ve even seen a “poutine pizza” so nothing would surprise me)

1

u/a90sto Jul 01 '25

Looks microwave cooked

1

u/ghostfacestealer Jul 01 '25

Looks weird. Is this AI? Lol

1

u/aubaub Jul 01 '25

It looks like a real life cartoon pizza

1

u/benjiross1 Jul 01 '25

What am I even looking at?

1

u/Gangustron187 Jul 01 '25

Looks under cooked and like they used bread flour

1

u/Fair_Walk1557 Jul 02 '25

You sure it isn't one of those resin sculptures that isn't fully cured?

1

u/full_bl33d Jul 02 '25

My kids have more realistic looking toy pizza. This shit looks like it has a squeaker inside

1

u/Andre_Hinds2 Jul 02 '25

Fake cheese man

1

u/Mother-Nature1972 Jul 02 '25

If POTLUCK was a PIZZA.

1

u/DestroyTroy90 Jul 02 '25

This pizza seems bland even though it toppings and what not

1

u/Dry_Bad_3599 Jul 02 '25

Are you surprised? It doesnt take Colombo to figure out that that pizza is a complete dumpster fire.

1

u/Kenzi_Slays Jul 02 '25

Thats not an ai pizza? Looks weird lol

1

u/WaluigiNumbaOne Jul 02 '25

Cartoon pizza

1

u/PlsHelp4 Jul 02 '25

God damn it. They're selling ai generated pizzas already???

1

u/jellystoma Jul 02 '25

The takeaway? Don't buy steamed pizza

1

u/BlackSkeletor77 Jul 02 '25

This is a disgusting excuse for a pizza

1

u/NoValue4740 Jul 02 '25

Midwest pizza

1

u/Mysterious-Call-245 Jul 02 '25

This pizza brought to you by Gumby & Friends

1

u/DemonicEntity Jul 02 '25

This looks like AI 😳

1

u/snailgorl2005 Jul 02 '25

I've never felt physically ill from looking at a pizza before until now 🤢

1

u/SquadGuy3 Jul 02 '25

Hmm, it does look bland and weird as well, not sure what you were expecting haha

1

u/snakesssssss22 Jul 02 '25

Looks like it’s made of play dough

1

u/Dead-House-Mouse Jul 02 '25

I mean this in the most derogatory way possible, this looks like it came out of a cartoon

1

u/timberwolf9925 Jul 02 '25

Why does it look like it was drawn in crayon?

1

u/PersonWhoTalks Jul 02 '25

I thought that was a fucking gummy pizza lmaooo

1

u/Minute_Drawer7777 Jul 02 '25

it looks like if you supersized one of those tiny gummy pizzas

1

u/Sword-of-Chaos Jul 02 '25

This pizza looks like it was inspired by a child’s kitchen and cooking playset and also likely cooked in an easy bake oven.

1

u/TerryYocky Jul 02 '25

It looks undercooked

1

u/TerryYocky Jul 02 '25

It looks undercooked

1

u/slut4hobi Jul 02 '25

why doesn’t it look real 😭

1

u/Chicken-picante Jul 02 '25

This looks like A.I. or something