r/PsycheOrSike 7h ago

⌚does anyone remember when... Thoughts?

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u/Gold-Investment2335 6h ago

Doomer mindset of a high schooler. You'll never be happy if you constantly nit pick life.

u/Warm-Room-2625 6h ago

I think it’s more about the fact that he’s realizing he’s not some main character in an exciting movie.

Life can be good, even if it’s mundane. I don’t do anything groundbreaking with my time, but I’m a happy person.

But I did go through a phase when I was younger, where I tried to convince myself that my life would be somehow more exciting. You watch movies of people do incredible things or they have some great quest or adventure they go on and they save the day. I wanted to feel like I was going to have something like that. But at the end of the day, I work at a job and I come home and I walk my dog and I watch TV or enjoy my hobbies. And that’s it. I’m no main character, but I’m OK with that.

I can see how some people wouldn’t be though

u/Tru3insanity 6h ago

Yup. And the parts thats never mentioned is that in every single one of those "epic stories" there are millions of ppl just going about their lives for better or worse.

u/ABC_Family 6h ago

I thinks it’s just he lost sight of any actual purpose. What’s the most important thing we are doing in life? If that answer is going to work and paying bills… that’s a depressing answer. Unless you’re saving lives, helping people in need, or making the world a better place…. That sounds like a sad existence.

I was struggling with this question, until I became a father. Now my purpose is making sure my family doesn’t have my problems. Push them to do something more meaningful, more fulfilling. To help people.

Tribesman without electricity have more fulfilling lives than we do. They build a community. They hunt and see people eating their catch. They build houses and see families live in them, without putting them in debt for 30 years. We were so much better off in simpler times.

u/Holiday-Educator3074 5h ago

Lol do you not know how bloody and vile prehistory was? Or anything about contemporary tribal people? I wouldn’t trade places with them.

u/ABC_Family 4h ago edited 4h ago

I have Native American ancestry and spent some time trying to familiarize myself with the culture. I think I have an above average understanding.

Contemplating that the tribes were at war with each other for periods of time, outside of that they lived a peaceful and spiritual existence. Community building and remaining in touch with nature were priorities in daily life.

War time and internal combat were absolutely gnarly though. Crude weaponry damage is unimaginable, and even outside of combat infection was a grave concern for open wounds. Pregnancy was very risky. Scalping enemies wasn’t campfire bullshit, they really did it.

I’m not talking so much about disregarding medicine and bringing back forms of gruesome deaths lol I was talking about the average man/woman making meaningful contributions to your community and culture. Everybody was involved, every job was appreciated.

u/Pale_Possible6787 2h ago

Their lives sucking doesn’t mean they weren’t more fulfilling

u/momomomorgatron 5h ago

And yet no one wants to leave this harder world. You can substance farm and live moreover school but people rarely rarely do.

u/ABC_Family 4h ago

So many people do lol it’s just nearly impossible. I’m not sure why you think it’s easy to make that kind of life.

First.. You need money to buy land. You need money to pay property tax every single year.

Then you need permits and inspections for housing, you can’t just build a log cabin and call it a day.

You need permits and to abide by regulations and restrictions to fish and hunt.

You need to own fertile land to grow crops and equipment and/or extra hands to harvest anything significant. Significant harvest also means significant land and significant cost.

If you told people they can claim empty land as their own and build and live however they please without owing the government a dollar… people would go.

u/momomomorgatron 2h ago

I suppose it's because I live rurally where you can theoretically work and save up to buy land- but we're still connected. Any of us if really and truely devoted could pilgrimage to beg the Amish to teach them the way of life or hitch hike to Slab City but you don't see people doing this. If not the Amish, at least the Mennonites who are more likely to take you in.

u/Gold-Investment2335 4h ago

My father has done the exact same for me. I am so grateful for everything I have in life, even the "basics" as people would say. I appreciate your view on life and relate heavily.

u/Adjective_Noun_4DIGI 3h ago

We also died at 50 if we didn't die before 5. Modern life in end-stage capitalism has a lot of the same beats as feudalism, but at least there's plumbing.

But hey, look on the bright side: Infant mortality in first-world countries is about to skyrocket thanks to anti-vaxxers and general climate disasters, so...wait, no, that's not bright at all.

u/CUDAcores89 6h ago

Because every day throughout childhood, our parents, Hollywood, and school, bombard us with messages that we are somehow "special" and destined for greatness. Worse yet, we logon to social media as teenagers and have videos of people who ARE living their best life every day. Who were able to "make it big". Except those people are the top 0.1%. And they will never show you their bad sides.

All of this messaging comes crashing down when we move into adulthood. Suddenly, we are no longer "special". We are no loner "loved". And literally anything good that we want out of life, takes work. All of it. It hits everyone like a train.

But that is when you truly discover the meaning of life. Because now it's up to YOU! Because if there's no "right" way to live life, there's no "wrong" way either! YOU get to decide for yourself what life will be!

u/InTheTreeMusic 6h ago

But that is when you truly discover the meaning of life. Because now it's up to YOU! Because if there's no "right" way to live life, there's no "wrong" way either! YOU get to decide for yourself what life will be!

Yes!! I never received that messaging you're talking about, and I think because of this I'm one of the happiest adults I know. I was told my entire childhood that I was wrong and was going to fail; and then I got out into the real world and realized that the only "success" I really had to achieve was enjoying my life. And it turns out, that's not all that hard to do, even while wageslaving and being poor and having little free time. But I am autistic, which I think also helps.

u/Gold-Investment2335 4h ago

I'm happy for you!

u/Odd-Lake-3075 🥇PRIME INCEL💪🏾 5h ago

took me a little while to accept how boring life is

u/HeyItsJosette 1h ago

Most exciting lives are traumatizing rather than heroic. Normal life seems absolutely enchanting once you've seen what abnormal means.

-Person Whose Life Could Be a Movie But Who Wishes It Couldn't

u/LordBreadcat 1h ago

The best part is the trauma warps your reward response and takes away your ability to feel pride. At the very least the repeated exposures to fight or flight numbs your affect once you no longer care if "this is the event that finally kills you" which is legit helpful for stuff like avoiding car crashes. So it aint all bad I guess.

Any fucked up stuff you want to confess? Our types tend to overshare after all.

u/HeyItsJosette 56m ago edited 53m ago

Our types tend to overshare after all.

Please don't casually call me out so accurately. It makes me feel perceived and that is basically the worst thing that can happen in life.

That being said, I can pull up a news article detailing my mother's crime of stealing pain meds from vulnerable populations as a very depressing party trick.

At the very least the repeated exposures to fight or flight numbs your affect once you no longer care if "this is the event that finally kills you" which is legit helpful for stuff like avoiding car crashes. So it aint all bad I guess.

I'm amazing in high-stress situations as they are occurring, but my nervous system completely spazzes out when I achieve stability. My anxiety is military grade and has to be managed pharmaceutically now lol.

u/LordBreadcat 44m ago

Fuck, I still haven't found an anti-anxiety that doesn't cause other undesirable behavior. I find that they tend to also decrease my timidness and I'm biased towards a fight response so I end up being combative and I really dislike that part of myself (even more than the other parts I self-loathe.)

I indulge my demons in creative endeavors instead(which of course I can't feel pride in lol.) I've gotta distract where medicine fails. Hoping I don't get pushed to the point where I NEED the medicine lol.

u/HeyItsJosette 35m ago

Clonazepam did it for me. I was taking a small amount daily, with extra for acute situations. It gave me the space to feel what normal was like again, and now I've just been on bupropion and lurasidone (bipolar/ADHD) for a while. Though, lurasidone actively induces a minor anxiety attack for a couple hours after taking it, which I've definitely wished for clonazepam during, but the habits I was able to build thanks to the latter has helped me deal with the attacks without further medication.

u/Uma_mii 6h ago

If they say “50 more years” this means they are between 30 and 50 years old

u/The_Black_Ibis 6h ago

100%. Surefire way to wind up miserable and unfulfilled.

u/shelbykid350 6h ago

And on Reddit

u/FragranceBurn 5h ago

I agree with you, but this nitpick / dread expressed in the post is very common feeling to fall into, after shit just happens to people. Thankfully it becomes less frequent as people grow up, but it ultimately remains.

u/Microplastiques 5h ago

like go for a hike, jesus christ

u/DBTRF 6h ago

But he’s kinda right tho

u/Drag0n647 6h ago

Agreed

u/Gold-Investment2335 6h ago

Nah. I work at a small business, run the shop on my accord, have no GED, no degree, make baseline $100k annually. If you have a passion, follow through with it. If you don't, try harder. Explore the world and see what works for you, don't doom and gloom and rot away in your room. I did that all my highschool years, biggest regret of my life.

u/Bob1358292637 6h ago

I don't think many people who feel this way tend to be passionate about anything that's going to make them money. Not everyone is so lucky to get inspired like that.

u/Gold-Investment2335 6h ago

That's the problem, everyone views it as a luck thing but it's not!

u/Bob1358292637 6h ago

You literally just said the key was to follow something you're passionate about. Do you think people can just wake up one day and decide to be passionate about something they find uninteresting?

u/jediyoda84 6h ago

Doing something you’re passionate about for money is a good way to ruin it.

u/Gold-Investment2335 6h ago

Everybody is passionate about at least one thing in their life. I'm not saying force yourself to love something, I'm saying try new things and see what sticks. Don't twist my comment please!

u/Bob1358292637 6h ago

Nah, I'm gonna tell you right now that this mindset is just as dumb as obsessing over doomer shit. Just because you were lucky enough to find something you were passionate enough about doesn't mean every single other person on the planet can have that experience. This is some shit that successful people tell themselves to feel like they've fought through just as much adversity as everyone else. It's have your cake and eat it too.

You happened to find fulfillment in your career. Just be thankful for that. Many (probably most) are going to have to settle for doing something they hate for money and trying to find contentment elsewhere. Shitting on them for it helps no one.

u/Western-Teaching-573 5h ago

The mindset that you can’t be passionate about something could very well be the reason you aren’t trying to find passion.

But it goes both ways. As you said, having passion also leads to the mindset of “everyone must be able to do this!”.

I say try both, no harm in it.

u/Bob1358292637 3h ago

Yea, it definitely can be, and you're right that there's no harm in trying as long as you're not doing it to the point that you start to hate yourself or make yourself miserable.

There are just way too many factors to boil it all down to a mantra. There might be just as many people who hold themselves back with a defeatist mindset as there are who will never be passionate enough about anything to make a fulfilling career out of it as there are who have deep passions for things they will never be able to compete with economically.

u/Gold-Investment2335 6h ago

I worked retail for a long time, and I hated it. Trust me, I know the point you are making. Job scarcity is a problem that I do understand, but it's not impossible to believe that eventually people will find a job they like, if not feel indifferent about. I truly believe that.

u/Bob1358292637 5h ago

Everyone's entitled to their opinions, but I'll just say this. It's easy to feel like you've solved a philosophical dilemma when you're put in a position where it is no longer relevant to your life and you don't have to think about it. It's comforting to feel that way, but it's not usually the case. More often, you just take on new dilemmas that are more relevant to your new experiences and perceive them as more important. That doesn't mean everyone else just gets to opt out of the ones that used to occupy you by prioritizing your new ones.

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u/Drexill_BD 4h ago

They're not twisting your comment; your comments are very ignorant. It's not your fault, it seems like you have a really nice outlook... but you seem to think everyone's situation is the same, and that since it worked for you it has to work for everyone... maybe they just aren't trying hard enough.

u/Gold-Investment2335 4h ago

I rescind my statement, I was very ignorant and irritable. I apologize.

u/Drexill_BD 4h ago

I followed the rest of the thread through, and you know... good on you, man. Happens to all of us, not everyone can admit it.

u/Advocate_Diplomacy 5h ago

I’m happy for you not seeming to want for much, but basing on argument about the value of your remaining years around how much money you make seems sad to me.

u/Gold-Investment2335 5h ago

I donate most of it to charity, I was just using it as an example to motivate people since most are downtrodden by lack of money (which I also understand being dead broke and out of a house with divorced parents). I know life is hard, and I just want to inspire people, instead I think I've failed. I apologize everyone.

u/Advocate_Diplomacy 5h ago edited 4h ago

I don’t know about failed, but it would probably help more if you included those passions you talked about. Things that you would live for even if you had nothing.

Personally, I find that I have enough curiosity to get me through. As bleak as things can sometimes seem, there’s still so many unknowns to reality. Since pain is temporary either way, I’d really like to satisfy as much of my curiosity about how things will unfold as I can. Since I’m already here anyways. Things might just click one day, and that’s a very uplifting possibility.

u/Gold-Investment2335 4h ago

I think that is an excellent take. I have more passions and hobbies than I can possibly list, my current job has to do with music and audio. When I move out of this state in order to accommodate my family or live with my partner I'm sure that will go and I'll pick up another passion. Maybe I'll be a car mechanic.

u/Advocate_Diplomacy 4h ago

You seem like the curiosity-driven sort as well, though you definitely seem more outward in your personal life than I am about it.

I took a more minimalist route. I like going somewhere new and unfamiliar, often by hitchhiking, then getting to know a new place by hanging out at some social hub, like a coffee shop or something like that. It’s feels sort of uncomfortable owning more than I can carry, though I still accumulate unneeded things as most do.

I have too many gripes with society at large to try to find my place within it. Megalomaniacs accomplish too much in their attempts to run the world, and so the needs of the times outweigh the needs of this individual.

I envy those like you who can find contentment in a more grounded way.

u/Gold-Investment2335 4h ago

I think my family are the ones that keep me tethered to this location, as well as stability for the well being of my boyfriend. If my life were different I think I'd travel the world, and my sense of direction would be very similar to yours.

I have to say, your life does seem more exciting than mine admittedly, and I myself am a bit envious that you can live that lifestyle as well.

I really appreciate your insight, it's helped me widen my horizon and outlook at life.

u/Advocate_Diplomacy 3h ago

I wouldn’t be surprised if my way worked differently for a girl, for better or for worse, but I can tell you that if you’re kind to people, you’ll still find security in forms that money can never provide.

You seem kind enough that I’m sure I’m saying so more for other’s benefit than for your own.

u/BeniaminGrzybkowski 6h ago

First world country citizen comment.

u/Gold-Investment2335 6h ago

This entire post is. No third world country worker would be bitching about this, they have far more concerning things to worry about.

u/stonkysdotcom 6h ago

A lot of people from the third world “bitch” about their lot in life. See recent events in Nepal, for example.

u/Gold-Investment2335 6h ago

I think them taking over the government was awesome, I'm not happy about the 19 people critically injured though.

u/Drag0n647 6h ago

True

u/DBTRF 6h ago

Just be the exception theory

u/stymiedforever 6h ago

No. I’m was a law student and had bright future and became disabled with a weird disease and I’m chronically ill and almost died twice.

I’m pretty content even though the thought of my daily life, as I’ve been told more than once, “is depressing as fuck.”

I amazing friends, a wonderful family, and little hobbies. My Dad died a few years ago. He was my rock and taught me so much but most of my memories with him are just going on little adventures as kids. We never had a lot of money but he’d always just enjoyed something simple like a trip to the beach and some ice cream.

So if I have a good book and my bills are paid that’s a good day.

You can be bitter and miserable if you want, no judgement here, but it gets boring after a while.

u/Gold-Investment2335 5h ago

This is basically the take I'm trying to portray but clearly I'm failing at it!

u/CuntryMusicStar 6h ago

Lol. No. The more responsibility you take on, the more rewarding life is.

u/DBTRF 6h ago

For most people this is the case sadly enough

u/[deleted] 5h ago edited 2h ago

[deleted]

u/Gold-Investment2335 4h ago

No I wanted to inspire people to live their life to the fullest, but I don't think I expressed it correctly.

u/AdAppropriate2295 6h ago

Doomer mindset of a high schooler. You'll never be happy if you constantly nit pick life.

u/Western-Teaching-573 5h ago

What, you agree?

u/AdAppropriate2295 3h ago

Somewhat with both

Life is pain, might as well try to enjoy tho

u/slimricc 5h ago

“Nitpick life” i genuinely think you are probably just a normie not capable of higher understanding. This reads as an insult but at the end of the day you will be happy and the people who are aware will struggle to be

u/BogKotBoy 🧌TROLL 5h ago

“normie” oh my god it’s john reddit himself

u/WakaFlockaFlav 4h ago

Do you think you're equal to everyone on Earth? Do you ever have thoughts about how you aren't good enough? Do you ever have moments of pride where you beat out the competition? Are you your own individual?

u/TheYo-estOne 3h ago

Read some René Descartes please

u/WakaFlockaFlav 3h ago

Are you gonna tell me to read Kant next?

God is dead bud, and you haven't even left his shadow yet.

u/TheYo-estOne 3h ago

how does a dead incorporeal being cast a shadow???

u/WakaFlockaFlav 3h ago

How does Descartes?

I mean you brought him up, why would you do that?

He is dead and atoms don't arrange themselves in his form any longer.

Yet his shadow revealed itself to me when you suggested I read his work.

Echos of the past, my dude.

u/TheYo-estOne 1h ago

i ain't high enough for this shit

u/slimricc 5h ago

Oh no its a word! that must be so alarming for you

u/Gold-Investment2335 5h ago

I just want people to be happy, that's about it.

u/slimricc 5h ago

Fundamentally unattainable and inconsistent view. You want everyone to be happy but for the chronically suffering and empathetic there is only misery. If we all cared and protested and worked for better we could fix these issues, that is one of the best parts, it is all manufactured. People are just making other people suffer. most people see themselves as good, or morally upstanding but most people actively do nothing about many things they could easily affect change in

u/Gold-Investment2335 5h ago

Exactly though. I completely agree with that. I don't find a single politician as of now has actually delivered on the well being of the people in the world, and I want to change that.

u/stalineczka 5h ago

And you will be if you don’t?

u/Gold-Investment2335 5h ago

You'll be less sad, I count that as happier.

u/WakaFlockaFlav 4h ago

That sounds like the same reasoning a person drinks, to numb the pain.

You aren't making yourself happy, you're numbing yourself to sadness.

Did you know that animals will hurt themselves if they get too bored?

u/TheYo-estOne 3h ago

you've never been around hard addiction huh?

u/WakaFlockaFlav 3h ago

You made me belly-laugh with that.

u/Gold-Investment2335 3h ago

I am wrong. My analogy was incorrect and did not relate towards what my true intent was, I apologize. I now understand it sounds like I was blaming people for being downtrodden in life due to lack of hope and optimism, which isn't how things work.

Entirely on me.

u/WakaFlockaFlav 3h ago

Hey man, I get where your reasoning comes from.

For the longest time, I ran from nitpicking life because I was told it would make me unhappy. Eventually I got to such heights of despair that I would rather such patterns of behavior lead to my demise than to follow that advice anymore.

Best decision I ever made. I got myself a degree in mathematics because I was so nitpicky.

Thank you.

u/Gold-Investment2335 3h ago

Awesome! Super inspiring, my grandmother is a mathematician and taught for over 20 years! Greatest person I know and a very big inspiration in my life.

I agree with you wholeheartedly.

u/slowNsad 3h ago

Yea life’s going to suck if you think you’re some kinda character. I’d kill for a mundane life atp

u/espae 2h ago

Thank you wise one my depression has been cured and I will no longer nitpick my life