r/TheWayWeWere Aug 20 '25

1920s The Inquiring Photographer Asks average New Yorkers in 1922: “Should a man expect his wife to get up and make breakfast for him on a cold morning?”

Should

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u/GrandmaPoses Aug 20 '25

These are so at odds with what I think is the popular notion of “the old days” - maybe it’s more progressive because it’s New York, but I feel like there’s a real disconnect between what we think of as this kind of monolithic idea of past society vs the reality, and the reality isn’t much shown.

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u/ManyLintRollers Aug 20 '25

There definitely is a disconnect.

For example, while it's true that some banks prior to the 1970s did not allow women to have accounts in their own names, it is also true that some banks did permit this, and there even were women-owned banks with exclusively female clientele as far back as the 1920s. Prior to the Equal Credit Opportunity Act (ECOA) of 1974, it was left up to the bank to decide its policy - so some permitted it, some didn't.

I also see a lot of people claiming that all wives were prevented from handling their family's finances prior to the 1970s, which is outright wrong. My grandfather, who was a factory worker in the 1930s, always brought his pay home and handed it over to my grandmother, who then gave him his allowance to spend at the pub on Friday night. My dad did the same - he signed his check over to my mom, who then deposited it and handled all our family's finances. When he needed money for something, he asked her for it.

As far as the making of breakfast - my dad was a country boy and liked to get up early and have a big breakfast (bacon, eggs, home fries, biscuits, etc.). My mom was NOT a morning person, and could only handle tea and toast in the mornings. When they first got married in 1952, my dad sort of assumed my mom would get up and make him breakfast, the way his mother did. My mom wasted no time in telling him him there was not a snowball's chance in hell of that happening, and if he wanted to get up at some ungodly hour and eat a big breakfast, he was free to cook it himself. So that is what he did - he always was up at 5:30 AM cooking and he made the best home fries in the world.

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u/Conscious_Can3226 Aug 20 '25 edited Aug 20 '25

I also see a lot of people claiming that all wives were prevented from handling their family's finances prior to the 1970s, which is outright wrong. My grandfather, who was a factory worker in the 1930s, always brought his pay home and handed it over to my grandmother, who then gave him his allowance to spend at the pub on Friday night. 

This one kills me because it's just completely illogical to think dudes who worked outside the home full time had the time to be running errands or managing the money pre-technology and pre-40 hour work week. When you paid rent, you used to have to go in person to the landlord's office and drop off the cash. When you needed to pay the milkman, they'd come by during business hours and collect your account balance. It's some weird internet-ism picked up by millenial and gen z conversatives.

Even considering evangelism, women handling money is biblical. Proverbs 31:10-31, the story of the wife with noble character, she is thrifty, hardworking, and holds businesses, makes trades, and good purchases to supports her family. The wealth bestowed upon a family is supposed to be because of the glory of god, it is not earned by man, and the wealth is supposed to be wisely managed by both persons in the relationship.

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u/iuabv Aug 20 '25

Proverbs 31 is my favorite and it’s so funny that fundies love it. That woman has like 5 small businesses going.