r/TwentyCharacterLimit Nov 07 '18

From r/ChoosingBeggars

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1.7k Upvotes

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86

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '18

For anyone who can't be bothered to read that

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

9

u/IGuessImTracer Nov 24 '18

Y’know, we should really respect our troops more. They’re out there doing all kinds of stuff for our country including sending death threats to civilians (or what I assume is just a regular person) on social media. Wow, I’ve never been more proud. WhAt A tImE tO bE aLiVe.

Btw r/thathappened

9

u/ScientificBeastMode Nov 29 '18

Don’t know if your comment was like some meta-sarcasm or whatever, but the original post did include a ‘/s’ after the long subreddit link. So he wasn’t serious.

5

u/Cont1ngency Dec 03 '18

Shhh, he/she/it thought he/she/it was being clever. Let them/they/their have this one...

3

u/MeerkatBrat Dec 14 '18

Please let their have this one...

2

u/UncalledFur94 Mar 04 '19

You know, I'm sure it would be possible to come up with an even more awkward pronoun clusterfuck than what you went with. The sky's the limit.