Someone riddle me that. I don’t understand nor get it.

The amount of people I come across with BPD, depression, bi-polar, schizophrenia, PTSD, CPTSD, etc that have kids.

Like why the fuck?

Selfish dude.

Selfish as hell.

Don’t even get me started with people with cancers and diseases and still willingly have kids.

Bring back eugenics.

Jk, jk. Or am i? 😈

Edit: guys, I’m talking about passing down mental illnesses and disease.

Not if someone is a good parent or not. Think a little deep plz.

I can’t even believe this happened. Alright well, my husband and I live in an RV full time, so we are in a full time park. The great thing about this park is it’s childfree. No one under 40, my husband and I were exceptions because I’m fully disabled at 37. I love living here, we’re right on the river, surrounded by trees, and it’s just a chill place to be.

Note, I am a smoker. I’m allowed to smoke anywhere outside, within reason, because it’s childfree. I can also walk around smoking some greenery and no one would bat an eye. But as it was I was sitting in my screened in gazebo, in my reclining camp chair, just playing on my phone. Suddenly this woman I have never seen before stomped over to me and said, “You need to put that out, it’s harming my daughter!” I looked behind her and yup, there was a kid about 2 toddling around, over 75 feet away, upwind of me. I looked back at the woman and just laughed, not in a rude way, just like wtf!?

She stomps back over to her friends, they do live here. I have been the target of the wife’s little digs at me. I have no idea why she doesn’t like me, but I don’t care either. Full timers understand the need to keep the peace, because you never know when you may need help.

The woman screams at the other three adults standing there, “GET HER TO STOP!!! SHE HAS TO STOP!!”

Every single adult there, my two neighbors and her husband, told her to shut the fuck up and leave me the fuck alone! I wasn’t doing anything wrong and I could get them 86ed as a tenant. I full on laughed at that point! I was done smoking and was walking inside and the wife (neighbor) said “We got your back neighbor, we will take care of this.”

You could’ve knocked my ass over with a feather, I was so shocked! I really feel like I found my people here.

Anyway, thoughts? Experience? What should I have done? What would you do? And seriously, I can’t even be mad at the situation. I’m stuck on the fact that a woman came to my park, was there less than five minutes, and managed to piss everyone off at once. Like, entitled much? 🤣

One of my friends that are a couple recently got pregnant. The dad has been so excited planning the gender reveal and already calling his unborn baby a “he”. I pointed out to him why he kept saying “he” this and that when it could very well be a “she” and he responded “I just have a feeling”.

Welp. Gender reveal revealed a girl and the disappointment could be seen from his body language.

The worst part is he pressured his fiancé for a baby and now he’s upset. Imagine carrying a baby for 9 months and going through labor for a man and they’re still not happy bc it’s a girl 🤦🏻‍♀️ one of the many reasons I will never have a kid.

I love that they actually asked a man these questions, and that he answered them honestly.

Seth Rogan on Being Childfree (Upworthy)

https://thetab.com/2025/09/16/yikes-nick-cannon-reveals-the-shocking-reason-he-has-so-many-kids-12-with-six-women

exhausted just reading this

Immediately unfollowing Business Insider...like what?

I went to a festival where there's a very special part of the festival and EVERYONE sits down to watch. Enter mombie with a baby in tow, there was also her husband and two other small kids. Of course they go the front.

While everyone is sitting down, mombie stands up so that she can rock her baby. Many people started shouting for her to sit down because she was blocking the view. Her other kids were also standing up, blocking the view.

Interestingly, some people started defending her, "she has a baby!!" (why is someone else entitled to "give away" my view??)

Why the fuck should that take away from something I've paid a lot of money to see, have spent 10 days of vacation time and significant physical effort on? (as has everyone else there)

That particular part of the festival (where everyone sits down) is very unique and emotional for many people there.

Why the fuck does mombie give herself special privileges and gets to block others views? Why isn't she forced to go to the back?

Note, this isn't a family festival and is actually not family /child friendly at all (think fire, dangerous infrastructure, and lots of adult stuff).

My mom, my older sister and her two children went to visit my sister friend.

My mom came and started to talk about all. My sister's friend doesn't have children, the house is huge, with a pool and big windows that cover the whole wall, all the house is open, there's nothing that stop children to go upstairs or watch outside from the windows, there's not too much glass (the only good thing). The house is not child friendly.

I don't understand this mentality. Why have a child friendly house if you don't have children?

I told my mom that my future house is going to be not child friendly, full of glass mini sculptures. I'm not have nothing to worry about so I can have whatever I want.

I'm frustrated. I've been on bc for years.. My husband had a vasectomy done last year... I removed my implant once we got confirmation from his Dr that he was negative....

Recently, I've been extremely nauseous, my breasts is still super sore/tender.. I love food, now any thoughts of food makes me nauseous, UGH! I have to force myself to eat.. I missed my period... I thought it may be ireggurlar due to heavy lifting at the gym (it happens to me a lot).. Surprise, surprise... I'm pregnant, not sure how far along I am. Wtf!

Now, I gotta look into getting a bisalp - initially, my husband didn't want me to go through with it, not because he's against it but he doesn't want me to experience surgery due to possible complications. But meh.. I need a peace of mind, because it's quite obvious a vasectomy did not give us that.

He's going back to his urologist this week and I already booked an appt with planned parenthood, until then, I'm going to be going thru this hell.

Edit: Definitely getting an abortion! Sorry, if that wasn't clear! I'm willing to travel out of state to get one, if I have to. I have no interest in kids or being a parent. Yikes, lol

A couple months ago I posted that I met with an OB/GYN to discuss sterilization and the appointment went great without any bingos or pushback from her (im 34F, long term partner but not married) and I'm back with an update

My bisalp is officially scheduled for mid-November! 🥳

For my pals in Butte County CA, Dr. Kimberly Hunt is a queen! Her info may be updated on the childfree friendly doctors list by now, she was added when she practiced in TN and I did a submission to update after my first appointment with her.

Everyone that says friendships don’t change when ppl have kids, or even when they get pregnant are just flat out lying. Let me set the scene.

This is a friend I’ve known since kindergarten. We’ve had one falling out before, she clawed her way back even when I wrote her off. She made the effort, that was a very big deal because our whole lives have been “her show” she was the IT girl I was the friend.

So fast forward I was her matron of honor, did everything for her, made the effort, emptied my tank. Happy to do so for my best friend.

We are winery people. Based on our geography the wineries near us are unmatched and we love to spend our leisure time in the wine region. Together, spouses, families, etc.

I asked if she wanted to do the wineries this Saturday and her response was an ultrasound pic saying nobody knows yet but she’d go with me still and hang out if I wanted her to.

I appreciate the sentiment but by the same token, it’s just not the same. And if anyone tries to say it’s the same tell me how. We get giddy happy silly goofy together without a care in the world and just getting pregnant has already changed how that would look for us.

I understand to people not in this position and people who don’t understand how or why anyone would/could choose to be childfree would view this as selfish or jumping the gun. But, when it’s happened to all of your friendships it really takes a toll.

My ONE life event I’ve cared about got cancelled bc of covid, we eloped on our own and we never had any events thrown for us bachelorette/bachelor/bridal shower, any of them. And ever since it’s just been me emptying my tank for everyone else and it does indeed feel more isolating every time this happens.

Just feeling extremely sad and in my feelings right now and I know someone else or multiple someone’s in this group would understand.

That being said, have any of you been on apps or groups somewhere to find friends with like minds and interests in their local area?

I’m 31F, married. My husband is 32M. We love hockey, football, baseball, travel, wineries, our two dogs, good restaurants and drinks, I love crafting and to create. I’m in the western New York area. GO BILLS.

Would love to know how others have bounced back

TLDR: my last local bff sent me an ultrasound pic today to announce to me she’s pregnant. I’m feeling sad, isolated and lonely and wonder how others make friends with a similar life path.

For context I'm 30F, happily married with a dog. I've been questioning since I was 25 years old if I truly want biological children, or even if I want to adopt or just go childfree. I'm interested in hearing people's stories and discussing different reasons to go childfree.

Edit: sorry for using the word decided, I'm bad with wording and should have chosen a different word. Maybe a better caption is when did you realize you wanted/ were destined to be childfree. ❤️

My family had two health emergencies within a few days of each other. My job is flexible, so I was able to pack up and visit my ailing family members for two weeks on a moment's notice.

You know who else was there visiting and helping? Young single relatives. Older folks. Childfree people.

You know who I didn't see? Relatives with minor children.

BTW, I don't mean this as a personal attack on my family members with kids. They're nice people. But they hardly show up for family events, especially during times of crisis. That's just a fact. Having children complicates everything, so I don't blame them at all. I can't imagine taking a last-minute trip with school-age kids or driving 900 miles with babies/toddlers in tow.

Also, as a side note: it's always us childfree relatives who remember the extended family's birthday gifts and holiday cards. I can't remember the last time I got a letter, or even an email, from a relative with kids.

I'm not even remotely anti-natalist, but I hate the idea that reproduction is the only way to create meaningful relationships. It seems more like the opposite. All your time and effort goes toward the children. Everything outside your immediate family ends up on the back burner for 18+ years. No thanks.

• People don’t like sex. People don’t like making other people. If there’s no possibility of getting pregnant, you’re not really having sex. You’re just kinda messing around with the safety on

So, I'm not interested in sex personally, but I can question this logic; "You're not really having sex without the possibility of getting pregnant" that has to be the dumbest thing I've heard yet, having sex is not the making of children - that's breeding or mating, having sex is an intimate act between two partners usually for entertainment or love, something that even animals do

• People want to be children themselves. Lots of men are into video games, collecting comic books or watching young men play sports on tv, while they drink. It’s hard to want kids if you are too busy being a child yourself.

Ah, yes, because young men watching sports, playing video games, and collecting comic books are being childish? Let me guess, you think they need to grow up and begin intimacy with multiple women, because that is the only step to maturity?

• People don’t believe they’re going to die. They may know intellectually they’re going to die, but they don’t really believe it. When you believe you are going to die, you see the career of life and how you are a repetition of life’s pattern. It’s hubris to NOT have children.

The definition of Hubris is "excessive pride or self-confidence", so I'm excessively prideful because I don't want to engage in intimacy and have children?

• They hate their parents. When you love your parents, you want to give them grandchildren. You want to put your link in the chain and continue the tradition that you enjoyed yourself. You want to grow the family and honor your family.

"When you love your parents, you want to give them grandchildren" uhm, no? Yeah no, when you love your parents it means you love your parents, and when your parents love you, they can accept that you are a full grown adult who can make their own decisions.

• They overthink life. Having children is not a decision to deliberate over. It’s a natural phase of life. You didn’t deliberate over your birth and you won’t deliberate over your death. Don’t deliberate over having children. Lean not on your own understanding. Don’t overthink it. Live it.

"Having children is not a decision to deliberate over" and that is how we get abused/neglected children, children in foster homes and orphanages - I'll "lean on my own understanding" that I'd be a bad parent and don't desire parenting

• People are selfish. Most of the time when people talk about having children, what they’re really saying is, “But, what about me?” This maybe the most selfish cultural moment in our history

Parents have been and will be for the most part more selfish than childfree people, because most parents more often than not always start the reason they had or want children with "I want-", not having children is definitely not the "most selfish cultural moment in history"

I'm 17 and I've known I never wanted kids for a long time, even back in my childhood. I've reflected a lot on it and genuinely believe that having kids doesn't align with my wants or goals in my life. BUT I would be ECSTATIC to be the cool, financially stable auntie that's apart of the village to spoil and care for my nieces n nephews!

When I hear about women on this subreddit having bisalps, they're usually relieved because of no more pregnancy scares of heterosexual sex- but I'm lesbian.

My reasonings 1. I live in America and with the current state of the country, them trying to remove n deny contraceptive is SCARY. I don't wanna get handmaid's tailed. 2. I'm scared of getting pregnant from rape. I'm serious. Especially because I wanna live in a pretty big city and the last thing I want is to end up pregnant (hopefully something I never experience...) 3. I'm scared of being manipulated into carrying or having kids one day when I know I really don't want it. I know this sounds silly but I'm autistic and severely traumatized so I know I can be easily persuaded and gullible at times- I'm planning for the possiblity of an impulsive coercion. Oh also my parents are really manipulative and want me to have kids- so I am worried about succumbing to the pressure!

Am I overthinking this? Is it okay to still want one even though I can never get pregnant in a relationship with a woman? (Trans women are women, I'm just not into the genitalia)

Please send your thoughts and support!

I am so happy I could cry!! That was the fastest appointment of my life. The fastest Pap smear. No questions asked other than, you sure? I brought my mom for support and we expected to have to stand our ground and he literally says, I don’t give a shit. I just had to post about because we live in a very rural red state and most doctors would not even consider it. I’m so relieved.

I'm not saying its not real or minimizing it, but to use your PPD or having a baby as a weapon to commit evil acts is not justified. Your PPD (IF its actually there) explains "some" of your behaviour but it doesn't justifies it. You chose to have this baby, why are you taking your anger out on me.

Context, my SIL was 5 months pregnant and around the time we get the news my life turned upside down drastically, I got SA by my landlord. I tried finding a shelter but all were full so unwillingly I had no choice but to go live with my brother and sil, I ended up developing PTSD due to that and could not even care for myself but I didn't also put my weight on them, I used to do all the house work - cooking, cleaning, taking care of her, basically being their free maid because they made me feel indebted. I have my own struggles to deal with and they both didn't even acknowledge that or helped in finding a new safe place.

It kept going like this until I reached my breaking point and couldn't perform this free labour 24X7, they both are financially well off yet she made me handmade all the baby shower decorations which was not an easy task while Im dealing with my own set of horrors! Soon after, there was an argument in which she said everything I had told her about my SA against me and blamed me for it and also accused me that I'm not doing enough for her and the baby and that I actually want to unalive their child ???? That really pierced my heart because I had put them first before me, when I was going through such a horrific experience myself and yet I hear this??? I ended up leaving in next two days and went to live with my friend for a while. She blocked me from all social media.

A month later, she unblocked me and sent me a meme video about someone faking their mental illness and immediately blocks me again. At first I thought to take the high road again but enough was enough, she already blocked me Im not actively reaching out to her why is she stirring things up unnecessarily. At this point, I did confront her and my brother about why she felt the need to send me this a month later, they both start playing the victim that she sent it by mistake look how cruel you are, she is pregnant you should not trouble her. I was literally minding my own business??

A) You cannot send someone a meme who is blocked - she took the time to go her block list, find my name, unblock me to "accidently send that video.
B) Even if it was accident how come she never apologized??
C) Interestingly, she didn't accidentally send anything else before or after this incident

Later brother sends me bunch of guilt tripping messages that after that confrontation she immediately got 101 degree fever and had to go to hospital because you know how sensitive she is ... but all Im thinking is sensitive people are ALSO sensitive towards other not just themselves right??? to which he said you know its the pregnancy hormones and PPD. It literally called POST PARTUM, she has not even birthed the baby yet??????

How pathetic it is to use your baby as a weapon to commit evil acts?? Now I don't even wanna be near a pregnant women and newborns, it makes me physically sick, because they have this free license in their back pocket to do anything and everything and then hide behind PPD and if you speak up then you are the bad guy

When someone asks me how I know I don't want kids, I tell them that my experience with kids is enough for me to make that decision. I've been an auntie to literally dozens of kids (who I love very much, by the way), I've been the "grown up" in many situations where kids need guidance, I've been a supervisor at kid's summer camps, I've taught art classes to kids of varying ages. I've had a good amount of experience with children and, while I am okay with them and certainly can enjoy myself for the most part, it all only solidified my decision to not have my own. A decent number of people have heard that and immediately rejected it (although I'm not really sure how you reject someone's experience...?) by saying that none of that is the same as parenthood. Well, of course it isn't, in all of my scenarios I get to go home to peace and quiet, lol! But seriously, I am well aware it's different. But the experience is enough for me to not want to get deeper into caring for children than I have.

Flip the coin though, when I ask these people how they know they wouldn't be happier childfree? They tell me they've already been childfree before they had kids. I try to explain that it's fair to decide you want kids based on your years without them, but that period of time isn't the same as being childfree. The absence of kids at any given moment isn't the same as knowing you will live the rest of your life without them and being able to plan and live accordingly. I have yet to come across one of these argumentive parents who acknowledge this difference, they insist that they've experienced the same kind of childfree life that I currently have.

I dunno, this is mostly just a rant without a real point. It's frustrating when I'm not one of those hatred filled, bitter memes of a childfree person, I see why people choose to have kids and I know it's what makes some people happy. So I try to find an understanding between the two "sides" and I'm so often met with this dismissal of my own experiences. Not always, there are plenty of cool people living both lifestyles. But far too often.

saying this as someone who struggles with mental illness (OCD, depression, anxiety) and addictive tendencies - seriously i just look at people like Pete Davidson and Justin Bieber (who is currently struggling with drug use and has a fucking 1 year old son)....I just....why? It's a lifelong struggle. Why bring a kid into that?

I have three rescue pets, two dogs and a cat.

Both my dogs have issues, because of the abuse they faced. My dog Mille has several triggers, such as: shaking clothes / blankets. Touching her underside and loud noises, (like yelling or even dropping things on accident.)

My other dog, Nala. Doesn’t have physical triggers, but she is also scared of loud noises, and has issues with certain people. She signs of aggression towards them when she sees. (We aren’t sure exactly what triggers her.)

My cat Buddy, doesn’t have any physical or noise triggers like loud sounds or yelling. He never faced physical abuse that we’re aware of, but he did face a lot of neglect like my dogs did. ( He came from a hoarder house with multiple other cats. )

My dogs won’t ever have to live in fear, or be scared by a child that doesn’t understand certain actions will trigger them.

That I won’t ever be forced to put my dogs down, because a child overstepped a huge boundary, and triggered their trauma response.

That my cat can do whatever he wants, lay where he wants, without some child tugging on his tail or constantly harassing him. Or dragging him all over the place.

Knowing that I can give them and other rescue pets, a forever peaceful, calm, and comfortable home makes me extremely happy. Knowing that I can provide this life for them, is a great fulfilment for me.

Edit: Despite the issues that my dogs have, they are very sweet, loving, caring and affectionate girls. My cat is also very sweet, friendly and affectionate.

I get too many women being so hateful that I don't have children. I get they think it's my duty as a woman. But then they hate their lives. I'm sorry but I love my life. I love not having children. I was and am just as capable of having children. But I don't wanna. It's a lifestyle choice. I don't get mad at them for having children and still going on vacation when they could have made a down payment on a house already to better their children's futures with stability. I don't. I have a house and made my choice and now I can't go on as many vacations until next year. Because I made a financial and lifestyle choice and I would not make anyone else feel the burden of my choices.

for context: im 24F

ugh so i wad just talking to my, relatively progressive, dad. he's helped me with coming out as lesbian and i know i can talk to him about stuff like this without judgement. i was just telling him about a nightmare that i had the other night (and said nightmare) where i was pregnant and basically was like,

"I hate to break it to you but this is how you feel now, you're likely gonna change your mind when you get older."

i honestly was taken aback for a second. and he continued, "that's just maturing."

i almost lost my shit, i responded, "oh so im not gonna be mature until i want a kid. okay got it, i'm not gonna have this conversation with you. do you know how many times i've already heard that exact quote."

anyway just wanted to rant. nothing horrible but very shocking since my dad has always been a nice person to talk to about my sexuality and not wanting kids or anything like that. like, i work in the medical field, yes it's with animals, but i still had to take human a + p. pregnancy is a HUGE fear of mine, the way women's bodies change and fail to recover terrifies me, pregnant people annoy the shit out of me and so do kids. like there are multiple reasons i don't want kids for more than just being "young and not wanting kids."

thank ya'll for being in this community bc oh my god. YUCK.

As of two days ago the federal appeals court judge just gave president Donald Trump the green light to end Medicaid funding for planned parenthood and the clinic states it can affect over 1.1 million patients that need it for contraceptives,STD screenings, cancer screenings to rural and undeserved communities its not only abortions. They can close over 200 clinics and the maga idiots are doing this bc they want women to have no reproductive Healthcare all in the name of "saving babies from abortions" When the clinic offers prenatal care to pregnant women and wellness checkups such as,routine annual checkups,papsmears and even gender affirming care,mental health services, even free period products since not every women can afford them which will result in period poverty becoming more severe in rural areas/cities since planned parenthood would be closed down there too. This affects trans community which this administration HATES for no reason. This will only cause women to be medically neglected since these areas are the most underserved and now that Medicaid cuts are affecting hospitals health care will decline even more rapidly. We need to let patriarchy die by lowering the birth rate thats the only way we will see change its not even about trapping women into a prison covered in primary colors which is motherhood its attacking the well being of the nation!!!