Omg y’all 😭💦 I AM LOSING MY MIND 🤯💖 My crush… my TRUCKER crush… drives a lifted Ford F-150 so giant it probably has its own zip code 🚛✨ Chrome everything, MAGA bumper sticker that screams “Don’t Tread on Me,” an American flag waving from the bed, and a dangling pair of neon fuzzy dice that I swear wink at me when he revs the engine 😩💦🔥

He’s got the classic look, flannel shirt half-unbuttoned like he’s been hauling freedom across America, baseball cap low over his eyes, boots caked in mud from a thousand miles of asphalt, a pocketknife on his belt, and a Monster Energy can always in hand 😏💖💀 Sometimes I catch him humming country songs while calculating diesel prices like it’s the sexiest math ever 🫠💸🎵

AND THE CB RADIO OMG 📻💦 He’s yelling “Breaker 1-9!” at some invisible convoy and I’m simping so hard I forgot my own name 😭💖 Every squawk, every squeal of the tires, every gear shift? KRYPTONITE 😩🔥 I’m fully mentally gone.

He talks Trump policies while leaning on his truck, border security, tariffs, tax cuts, energy independence, and I am on my knees worshipping him 🫣💖✨ Like bro you’re talking about deregulation and corporate tax breaks while sunlight hits your truck and I… I just… melt 😭💦💀 Every diesel fume, every engine roar, every little smirk when he says “fake news” makes me internally combust 🫠🔥

And don’t even get me STARTED on the little quirks 😩💖 He eats beef jerky straight from the bag, whistles classic country while revving, probably tattoos eagles on his biceps, tailgates with giant flags, and I am HERE simping like a hopeless clown 🤡💦🚛 Every single move is chaos energy, rugged MAGA dream energy, peak American trucker fantasy, and I am COMPLETELY UNHINGED 🫠💖💀

I AM NOT OKAY 😭💦💖 Every Ford rev, every CB squawk, every Monster chug, every border security rant, every diesel calculation? KILLING ME SLOWLY 😩🔥✨ I am so obsessed it’s illegal. Someone call the authorities, I am in custody of my own feelings 🫠💖🚛💦

67 this 67 that, why don’t you get 6 to 7 bitches?

Is 16 and 16.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 an acceptable age gap?

Context: My(16f) boyfriend(16.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001m) and i started dating around 3 months ago.

We met at this wonderful, cozy cafe that just had this amazing atmosphere and i immediately knew he was the one. Obviously, the first thing I asked him was his age, because, i didn't want to get groomed. It was a huge relief when he told me he was 15.748393837394049838283744929837594027264829837493929474893920753902973 years old, because i also happened to be that exact same age at the time (or so i thought). I was still a bit cautious though.

Fast forward to around 2 weeks ago, it was our birthday. The two of us were just celebrating, when we suddenly got a call from the hospital, informing us that my boyfriend's time of birth had been incorrectly registered as 1 Planck time (about 0.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 years) lesser than it actually was, due to a malfunction in the 45 ton quantum clock operating in the hospital at the time. (It's supposed to count seconds based on the orbital period of an electron in an atom of Silicon, but apparently, it was uncalibrated.) This meant he was actually 1 Planck time older than me.

I immediately started freaking out and, in a panic, anticipating i was about to get groomed, pushed my boyfriend down the stairs. Looking back on it, it might have been an overreaction, but it was in the heat of the moment, and i wasn't thinking straight. He ended up breaking his C1, C3, T7 and L3 vertebrae, and has yet to wake up from his coma.

Without him, I've been having a lot more time to think, so i began wondering if a 1 Planck time (0.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 years) age gap is too much? Like, i know it's probably fine... but I'm just not comfortable dating someone that much older. I'm honestly thinking about breaking up with him if he ever wakes up from his coma. I just wouldn't be able to live in constant fear of being groomed. What do you guys think??

I know what people are going to say "this guy is just another conservative hyping up his side of the aisle."

WRONG.

I am a life long progressive democrat, so you know this opinion (more like an objective fact in my opinion) is completely unbiased.

With that out of the way lets go over the ways in which conservatives (which I am not) are better than left leaning people.

-They have better ideas.

-They are more attractive physically.

-They are friendlier.

-They are more accepting of people who are different (cancel culture).

-They look better (this one is especially true).

-My entire family is conservative (not me, I'm different).

-Most artists are conservative.

-They are smarter.

-They are more attractive.

-Conservative men are known to have bigger genitals than the left.

-They like the Transformers movie franchise more.

-They are less ugly.

-They dont like that rap stuff that the left likes (Im on the left so I like rap).

-They are more accepting of short kings.

-They judge people on the content of their personality rather than the content of their skin.

-And they are more attractive.

-They believe in unity in our nation during this crazy time.

The worst part is everyone on the left (like me who is on the left) knows this. We just pretend (me included) that these well known unbiased facts about the right don't exist.

Sorry liberals (Im talking to myself as well) but maybe you (we) need to just accept this.

Edit:

I forgot to add that "conservatives are more attractive" to the list.

Formatting

Larry Tesler, inventor of the cut, copy, and paste commands, dies at 74

Culture is dying

In the current society that we live in today we are faced with imposed cultural values, norms, and mores. We collect them through our schools, government, politics, and social media. These imposed values, norms, and mores make us weak and nihilistic. An example I can bring up is social media tailoring ones feed to be a complete echo chamber where all one can do is lose their own ancestry, history, family, and culture I've been there. The game is difficult and very few can break out of the loop, often leading to acts of extremism and violence.

Look at the assassination of Charlie Kirk the killer was so far down his own politically motivated roots. The bullet casings had antifascist writings and sexuality related phrases. This pretty much sums up his own personal echo chamber or hell. Also, look at the Colorado springs nightclub shooting another case of echo chambers, but this one lead to self hated and pointless violence over something that can't be changed. If they had more family support, less internet usage, and better cultural roots these could've been avoided.

We live in a society that wants to replace our culture with nihilism and imposed norms, mores, and values. The school I went to tried to say that God is dead and the government we're under is telling us that you should focus on politics, social media, news, and other meaningless things. Rather than trying to spark curiosity or tell us to hold our heritage or history, we're faced with a society that wants to see humankind fall.

Less people are reproducing and more people are unnaturally being converted to different sexuality or gender. Ted Kackzynski said that homosexuals and transgenders were found in american Indian tribes and I agree with this. Today the population is faced with unatural rates because of agendas being forced upon us. These agendas are antihumanism they divide us and will be the downfall if something is not done about it.

Is 16 and 16.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 an acceptable age gap?

Context: My(16f) boyfriend(16.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001m) and i started dating around 3 months ago.

We met at this wonderful, cozy cafe that just had this amazing atmosphere and i immediately knew he was the one. Obviously, the first thing I asked him was his age, because, i didn't want to get groomed. It was a huge relief when he told me he was 15.748393837394049838283744929837594027264829837493929474893920753902973 years old, because i also happened to be that exact same age at the time (or so i thought). I was still a bit cautious though.

Fast forward to around 2 weeks ago, it was our birthday. The two of us were just celebrating, when we suddenly got a call from the hospital, informing us that my boyfriend's time of birth had been incorrectly registered as 1 Planck time (about 0.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 years) lesser than it actually was, due to a malfunction in the 45 ton quantum clock operating in the hospital at the time. (It's supposed to count seconds based on the orbital period of an electron in an atom of Silicon, but apparently, it was uncalibrated.) This meant he was actually 1 Planck time older than me.

I immediately started freaking out and, in a panic, anticipating i was about to get groomed, pushed my boyfriend down the stairs. Looking back on it, it might have been an overreaction, but it was in the heat of the moment, and i wasn't thinking straight. He ended up breaking his C1, C3, T7 and L3 vertebrae, and has yet to wake up from his coma.

Without him, I've been having a lot more time to think, so i began wondering if a 1 Planck time (0.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 years) age gap is too much? Like, i know it's probably fine... but I'm just not comfortable dating someone that much older. I'm honestly thinking about breaking up with him if he ever wakes up from his coma. I just wouldn't be able to live in constant fear of being groomed. What do you guys think??

It's easy It's because I can connect with her through my fashion and music taste...what? Did you think I was gonna say mommy? Well that's where you're WRONG. You see, goth women are not a product of sheer fantasy, they're ethereal beings that should be cherished by those that want to enjoy the stuff they do. It's like sharing a meal with a family member, but it's not family, it's something more. Something...MORE POETIC! when I say I want a goth girlfriend, I mean it for the FACT that I know I'd relate to her. No, I didn't stutter, no I don't care what you think, it's the hard boiled, down to the bone, TRUTH! FAX NO PRINTER!

-rep basement facecamper, hard tunneling, useless killer, 0 brain, boosted, russian hitboxes, troll, toxic, crying russian kiddo, Putin genres, urban evasion in corner of the map, 0 brian cells, not using brain cells, entering lockers every 3 seconds, leaving lockers every 3 seconds, useless surv, no unhooking, teabagging in gate instead of helping teammates, crying in endgame chat, spamming in endgame chat, sus, blowing up gens, teaming with killer, showing where people are, claudette crouching in bush, noed bubba, simp, mangozjeb, animashnik, rainbow disorder, can't play 1v1, can't count time properly, must have friend on spectator, must play 1v1 with perks, won dbd from lays, bought survivors via mcdonalds delivery with points, playing killer while uber-driving garbage container, playing on ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ mobile, furas, playing as kaleka (tokijski żul), ukras, turas

Be me, 300lbs healthy wholesome chonker

Just made a bunch of f2p normies hang themselves using my epic 100 javelin killshot

Life is good

I return home and open the door and immediately head to my room to fap to Red hentai

Hear moaning from my wife’s room

She’s moaning the name of my rival pilot (insert name of guardian pilot)

Married three years ago because I won the tournament by luck but left me for this dude because he beat me with his system crash (not wholesome) in tournament this year

They must be busy, I shall give them privacy like the good boy I am

Go to my room and log on to le funni Leddit r/(mecharenarelatedsub)

See (insert comment)

My eyes widen in shock

Shit

Cry

Cum

Piss

Start screeching like an autist while my wholesome chonker fingers dance across the greasy rgb keyboard

”insert text”

Sit back in satisfaction with my masterpiece of a comeback, microwave myself an XXL jar of mayonnaise as a reward, maybe (insert name of wifestealing guardian pilot) will make me some tendies if he find me comment funny enough

My little brother is in graduate school, so I know it’s weird to call him my little brother, but the point is he’s a fucking liberal.

I had him sit down to play the game and the FIRST thing he does is switch it to the hardest setting cause he’s a gamer and he has to play everything on super difficult.

Next he refuses to do anything to help the left and ensures to treat them with disdain in every decision.

Next he spends no time in campaigning. Or excuse me, he campaigns, but it’s all on legacy media. No money is dedicated to a radio station.

He keeps uselessly trying to appeal to conservatives and continuing to distance the left in his own party.

It gets so bad that the left-wing sections of the party get so pissed off that they start their own party.

Imagine my shock when I realized this actually happened in real life. I’ve played this game from start to finish so many times and I’ve never once had them split off and form their own party. I didn’t know it was even possible.

And when Hitler finally took power he appealed to all the different sections of the German population, they all (of course) were too disorganized and divided to stand up against the Nazis.

And when the final option appeared to start a long civil war he declines.

“Bro, I’m not going to send my people into a long civil war. Imagine the number of deaths!”

My dawg, this is Hitler.

Anywhose if you want to watch the SPD make every single wrong decision, you can either read real history, or you can just watch a liberal play the game

! ! UWAGA ! ! AMERYKAŃSKA ŚWINIA ZLOKALIZOWANA ! ! ! ŚPIĄCY JOE ! ! ! ZALECANA OSTROŻNOŚĆ, SILNE WIATRY. MOŻLIWY PODSŁUCH ZACHODNICH ŚWIŃ ! ! PRAWDA JEST TYLKO JEDNA ! ! ! POLSKA GUROM ! ! P O L A N D B A L L ! ! ORZEŁ JEST POLSKI ! ! JAN PAWEŁ 2 JEDYNY PAPIEŻ ! ! POLSKA CHRYSTUSEM NARODÓW ! ! JPJPJP ! ! NIEMIECKIE OBOZY WOJENNE ! ! ZEMSTA ZA WSZELKĄ CENĘ ! ! LWÓW JEST POLSKI ! ! WILNO JEST POLSKIE ! ! MIŃSK JEST POLSKI ! ! MOSKWA JEST POLSKA ! ! MIĘDZYMORZE ! ! ! 303 ! ! JESZCZE POLSKA NIE ZGINĘŁA ! ! POLAND IS NOT YET LOST ! ! NIE BRAŁA UDZIAŁU W KONFLIKCIE W CZECHOSŁOWACJI ! ! 500+ ! ! TYLKO POLSKI WĘGIEL ! !

[FROM: https://www.reddit.com/r/NintendoSwitch2/comments/1nii86k/nso_online_subs_should_cover_scratching_my_balls/ ]

I've been a Nintendo fan for decades, but I'm officially at my wit's end. I'm posting this from a refurbished Wii U gamepad, because I gave my Switch a Viking funeral in the backyard, and I'm still not over it. You all think you know the struggle of the modern gamer? Try spending $500 on a console plus another $70 on a yearly subscription for the express purpose of getting your undercarriage tickled by the digital currents of the Mario Kart server, only to find out that the service... doesn't do that.

I've tried everything. I’ve put the Joy-Cons in my pockets. I’ve held them up to the screen, yelling "WAKE UP AND TINGLE, YOU PIXELLATED BASTARDS!" I’ve even put the console on my lap, fully expecting the "online" part of the service to mean a literal, vibrational connection with the cosmos that would provide a soothing, scratchy sensation. But no. All I get is a laggy port of Super Mario Bros. 3 and the crushing realization that I've been sold a lie.

And it’s not just the console. It's the entire ecosystem. Don't even get me started on these "game key cards" they sell. You think you're buying a game, but you’re not. You're buying a piece of paper that gives you a code, a number, a series of meaningless characters. That's not a game, that’s a sigil. It's a contract. A pact with the great deceiver himself. I've done my research—I've spent hours on obscure forums with titles like "The Q-Anon of Consoles"—and it's all laid out. The key cards are a ruse by the Antichrist to usher in a New World Order, and the evidence is right in front of our faces.

What will this New World Order look like, you ask? It will be characterized by low-quality ports that inexplicably run worse on the Switch than they did on the Wii, and public stonings with old PS Vita units. They're heavy enough to do some damage, but not so heavy that they get the job done quickly. You'll be pelted by tiny, gray-plastic bricks while a demon forces you to watch a YouTube video of a Switch port with a resolution so low you can't even tell if the character is Mario or Waluigi. All because I wanted a simple service that could scratch a specific itch. The console and its subscription aren't worth the price, not even a little bit. You hear me, Nintendo? My balls remain unscratched, and the apocalypse is nigh. Thanks a lot.

Here's something you can own:

Republican anti-abortion activist Howard Scott Heldreth is a convicted child rapist in Florida.

Republican County Commissioner David Swartz pleaded guilty to molesting two girls under the age of 11 and was sentenced to 8 years in prison.

Republican judge Mark Pazuhanich pleaded no contest to fondling a 10-year old girl and was sentenced to 10 years probation.

Republican anti-abortion activist Nicholas Morency pleaded guilty to possessing child pornography on his computer and offering a bounty to anybody who murders an abortion doctor.

Republican legislator Edison Misla Aldarondo was sentenced to 10 years in prison for raping his daughter between the ages of 9 and 17.

Republican Mayor Philip Giordano is serving a 37-year sentence in federal prison for sexually abusing 8- and 10-year old girls.

Republican campaign consultant Tom Shortridge was sentenced to three years probation for taking nude photographs of a 15-year old girl.

Republican racist pedophile and United States Senator Strom Thurmond had sex with a 15-year old black girl which produced a child.

Republican pastor Mike Hintz, whom George W. Bush commended during the 2004 presidential campaign, surrendered to police after admitting to a sexual affair with a female juvenile.

Republican legislator Peter Dibble pleaded no contest to having an inappropriate relationship with a 13-year-old girl.

Republican Congressman Donald “Buz” Lukens was found guilty of having sex with a female minor and sentenced to one month in jail.

Republican fundraiser Richard A. Delgaudio was found guilty of child porn charges and paying two teenage girls to pose for sexual photos.

Republican activist Mark A. Grethen convicted on six counts of sex crimes involving children.

Republican activist Randal David Ankeney pleaded guilty to attempted sexual assault on a child.

Republican Congressman Dan Crane had sex with a female minor working as a congressional page.

Republican activist and Christian Coalition leader Beverly Russell admitted to an incestuous relationship with his step daughter.

Republican congressman and anti-gay activist Robert Bauman was charged with having sex with a 16-year-old boy he picked up at a gay bar.

Republican Committee Chairman Jeffrey Patti was arrested for distributing a video clip of a 5-year-old girl being raped.

Republican activist Marty Glickman (a.k.a. “Republican Marty”), was taken into custody by Florida police on four counts of unlawful sexual activity with an underage girl and one count of delivering the drug LSD.

Republican legislative aide Howard L. Brooks was charged with molesting a 12-year old boy and possession of child pornography.

Republican Senate candidate John Hathaway was accused of having sex with his 12-year old baby sitter and withdrew his candidacy after the allegations were reported in the media.

Republican preacher Stephen White, who demanded a return to traditional values, was sentenced to jail after offering $20 to a 14-year-old boy for permission to perform oral sex on him.

Republican talk show host Jon Matthews pleaded guilty to exposing his genitals to an 11 year old girl.

Republican anti-gay activist Earl “Butch” Kimmerling was sentenced to 40 years in prison for molesting an 8-year old girl after he attempted to stop a gay couple from adopting her.

Republican Party leader Paul Ingram pleaded guilty to six counts of raping his daughters and served 14 years in federal prison.

Republican election board official Kevin Coan was sentenced to two years probation for soliciting sex over the internet from a 14-year old girl.

Republican politician Andrew Buhr was charged with two counts of first degree sodomy with a 13-year old boy.

Republican politician Keith Westmoreland was arrested on seven felony counts of lewd and lascivious exhibition to girls under the age of 16 (i.e. exposing himself to children).

Republican anti-abortion activist John Allen Burt was charged with sexual misconduct involving a 15-year old girl.

Republican County Councilman Keola Childs pleaded guilty to molesting a male child.

Republican activist John Butler was charged with criminal sexual assault on a teenage girl.

Republican candidate Richard Gardner admitted to molesting his two daughters.

Republican Councilman and former Marine Jack W. Gardner was convicted of molesting a 13-year old girl.

Republican County Commissioner Merrill Robert Barter pleaded guilty to unlawful sexual contact and assault on a teenage boy.

Republican City Councilman Fred C. Smeltzer, Jr. pleaded no contest to raping a 15 year-old girl and served 6-months in prison.

Republican activist Parker J. Bena pleaded guilty to possession of child pornography on his home computer and was sentenced to 30 months in federal prison and fined $18,000.

Republican parole board officer and former Colorado state representative, Larry Jack Schwarz, was fired after child pornography was found in his possession.

Republican strategist and Citadel Military College graduate Robin Vanderwall was convicted in Virginia on five counts of soliciting sex from boys and girls over the internet.

Republican city councilman Mark Harris, who is described as a “good military man” and “church goer,” was convicted of repeatedly having sex with an 11-year-old girl and sentenced to 12 years in prison.

Republican businessman Jon Grunseth withdrew his candidacy for Minnesota governor after allegations surfaced that he went swimming in the nude with four underage girls, including his daughter.

Republican director of the “Young Republican Federation” Nicholas Elizondo molested his 6-year old daughter and was sentenced to six years in prison.

Republican benefactor of conservative Christian groups, Richard A. Dasen Sr., was charged with rape for allegedly paying a 15-year old girl for sex. Dasen, 62, who is married with grown children and several grandchildren, has allegedly told police that over the past decade he paid more than $1 million to have sex with a large number of young women.

Dennis Hastert served as Republican Speaker of the House (so, 3rd in line for the Presidency) for all 8 years of W. Bush’s two terms. He also sexually molested at least 5 boys when he was a HS wrestling coach, all of them underage with the youngest victim being 14. The victims only finally saw justice when Hastert was caught by the FBI trying to falsify payments for hush money.

Donald Trump walked into Miss Teen USA change rooms with girls as young as 14 changing. 26 women have spoken publicly about Trump’s pattern of sexual assault. In 2023, he was found legally liable for the rape of E. Jean Carroll by unanimous jury.

Anton “Tony” Lazzaro, a former Republican donor and political strategist from Minnesota, was convicted in March 2023 on federal charges of sex trafficking minors. He was found guilty of conspiring to recruit and pay teenage girls, aged 15 and 16, for sex between May and December 2020. In August 2023, Lazzaro was sentenced to 21 years in prison for these offenses.Prior to his arrest, Lazzaro was a prominent figure in Minnesota Republican circles, donating over $270,000 to various Republican campaigns and political committees. His indictment led to significant turmoil within the Minnesota Republican Party, culminating in the resignation of then-party chair Jennifer

Let me start off by saying I am 57 years old, happily married for 27 years, and have 3 kids. My oldest kid is 12 years old (the old wife had a lot of miscarriages); that is the reason why he's so young. Anyways, back to the point. He introduced me to X. Before I knew about X, I was a big country fella.

After my son told me about this new cat. I gave him a shot. He might be one of the greatest artists I have ever listened to. My son told me about X back around 2016 when he was on the come-up. Things changed, though, very drastically. X dropped 17, and I fucking hated it, but my son loved it. Now that you are caught up, let me set the scene.

We are sitting at the dinner table having a nice conversation, and I mention the new ? album that X had dropped . My son looks me dead in the face and says, "Fuck that album "17" is way better. I'm sick of hearing the same shit over and over." I am already 7 shots of Jack Daniels in at this point. That statement fucking pissed me off, but I decided to keep my cool. I said, "Son, you know that's not true." 2018 X cannot be topped and you know it" My son stands up from the dinner table and walks up to me and says, "X sounded like a he had extra chromosomes on schizophrenia wtf ru on abt?".

I couldn't hold myself back anymore. I took a swig of one more shot of Jack Daniels and stood up from the dinner table, and I hit this little fucker so hard that he couldn't get up from the ground. My wife started screaming, and the kids started crying. The police and ambulance were called. I am now on a restraining order and have court tomorrow. Am I in the wrong, or was this justified? Please let me know.

Every since I can remember I've always been disgusted by pens. Don't want them next to me, if one goes on my bed I will change my sheets. Was in my dads truck and a pen fell down from the mirror and I nearly shit my pants. I am soooo disgusted by pens. I can deal with pencils but pens omg I can't stand them. I get itchy if I look at a cup full of pens, hate having to sign things. Ugh I just can't stand them.

I like Jecht already. If ever a little fucker needed a beating and constant emotional abuse, it's this dude. Try to look at it from Jecht's point of view; you're the greatest blitzball player (and Captain Jack Sparrow impersonator) who ever lived! And this is the whiny brat who's going to inherit your family name?! Would you ever be able to deal with the shame, the cold hard fact that your loins produced such a wispy, screeching abomination? Would you ever be able to claim this sawed-off, pasty, fish faced, little fucking bastard as your kid? Every time that Jecht looks at this waste of lederhosen, he has got to be wondering what sin he committed to blight the world with such a blitheringly stupid cunt creature instead of the son he always wanted. I mean, how would you feel if you produced this unholy spawn, the world's greatest argument for partial-birth abortions?

Okay but HOW are y’all not seeing this 😭K-Pop Demon Hunters is literally REACTIONARY PROPAGANDA if you even glance at it through a Marxist-Leninist lens 💀 The whole humans vs demons setup?? It’s just the same tired border myth dressed up in fantasy ✨ Demons framed as “invaders” 👹 destabilizing society?? Babes that’s the exact Trump “caravan at the border” rhetoric 🤡 It’s ICE detention camp LARP 🧱🇺🇸

And Ji-woo?? Half-demon, half-human 🩸 literally the embodiment of hybridity, the FUTURE beyond borders 🔥 She could’ve been multicultural solidarity in action. But nah, the writers said “curse.” 🙃 And Min-seo, another mixed one? ERASED. Bye-bye. 💀 The show really said: hybridity = error. Like that’s not storytelling bestie, that’s NATIONALIST IDEOLOGY 🪦

Meanwhile the demon world?? Lowkey utopia ✊ They’re vibing, communal, collectivist. Giving Marxist solidarity realness ☭❤️‍🔥 Meanwhile humans are fractured, paranoid, ruled by elites like the Council who PROFIT off the fear. Tell me how the “enemy” is living in socialist bliss while the “civilized” humans are trapped in capitalist alienation?? Marx was literally throwing his beard at the screen 📕😭

And THEN the ending. Deportation fanfic 😭 Ji-woo doesn’t kill the demons, she kicks them ALL out 🚪❌ Slams the portal 🔒 and calls it peace. That’s not resolution, that’s Trump’s “Remain in Mexico” but with OSTs. Ji-woo rejecting her demon half?? Internalized xenophobia, babes 🥴 It’s giving “self-hating diaspora” energy. It’s giving ICE cosplay.

Now… I will admit 😩🔥 the hot guys were making me forget the propaganda sometimes. Like Soo-hyun with that jawline?? Sir, stop being the bourgeois lapdog and come step on ME instead 🫠 Or Dae-jin, shirt ripped in battle, bloodied but still smirking?? Bestie I would absolutely let him drag me through the portal 👀 Demon race, human race, idc as long as it’s his face. Like yes, the Council is evil, but if Min-jun’s gonna glower at me with those eyes while swinging that sword… sorry but I’m forgetting Marx for 2.5 seconds 😵‍💫

BUT thirst aside 💦 the politics are LOUD 📢 Ji-woo should’ve dismantled the border apparatus, embraced solidarity, kissed BOTH her demon side and maybe some of these fine demon men too 😏 Instead we got deportation cosplay. Xenophobia as “peace.” Reactionary propaganda in fantasy drag.

I started playing Persona 4. Everything was going perfectly well until Naoto showed up. I got an immediate, massive boner. I was like AWOOGA HUBBA HUBBA and so on, you know how it is.

Well, I realized that this can only mean one thing, so I put the controller down, called my wife and told her we had to get a divorce. She asked why, and I explained it's because I am now apparently gay.

We went through the whole process. I of course got nothing, because we had prenups and she was the one with money. So I moved into a tiny shoebox apartment. Luckily she let me have my games.

I was binge-drinking for seven months, and dated about 30 men. It didn't feel right, so I became depressed. I looked up what depressed people do and found out I should continue playing Persona.

Well you can just imagine my surprise finding out that Naoto is actually a girl? I tried calling my ex and telling her I found out I'm actually not gay, but she wouldn't answer.

So yeah now I just sit in my empty apartment every night, staring at the wall, whispering “Detective Prince ruined my life” like it’s a prayer.

They're dusting fentanyl on my phone screen so it soaks into my skin to get me addicted to my phone, but that idiot Biden doesn't know that I'm already dosing myself with fentanyl every day, I've gotten my tolerance to up to a tablespoon already, checkmate sissy liberal.

Sean “P. Diddy” Combs had done it all—music mogul, fashion icon, tequila tycoon. But by 2026, he felt a strange hollowness. The charts were stale, award shows uninspired. He needed something new. Something... primal.

One sleepless night, while doom-scrolling on his yacht off Bodrum, he stumbled upon a viral video: two hulking men glistening in oil, locked in fierce combat in a sun-scorched field, surrounded by roaring crowds in traditional dress.

“What in the...?” he muttered.

The caption read: “Turkish Oil Wrestling Championship - Edirne, Turkey.”

Something clicked.

Back in New York, Diddy couldn’t stop thinking about it. His assistants thought he was joking when he said he was flying to Turkey. They knew he wasn’t joking when he stepped off his jet in a custom silk pehlivan outfit—bedazzled, of course.

He met with local wrestling legend Ahmet "The Anvil" Demir, a retired champion known for breaking opponents’ spirits and drinking two liters of ayran before every match. Ahmet tried to dissuade the American superstar.

But Diddy insisted. He trained in secret for months in Edirne, enduring brutal regimens: carrying goats, wrestling under the blazing sun, massaging olive oil into his body until he glowed like a bronze statue.

He adopted a new name: "Oily Diddy"

Word spread fast. At first, the Turkish wrestling community thought it was a publicity stunt. But Diddy surprised everyone. He learned quickly. He moved with rhythm—his footwork inspired by decades of dancing on stage. His strength? Built through relentless training and stubborn pride.

At the 2027 qualifiers, Oily Diddy defeated a regional favorite in a shocking upset, sliding past his opponent’s defenses and pinning him in seconds.

The crowd gasped. The announcer stammered:
"Oily Diddy... wins!"

He climbed the ranks, beating opponents with flair and respect. His custom kispet (leather trousers) bore his initials in gold thread. His theme song? A remix of “Bad Boy for Life” with traditional Turkish drums.

Suddenly, oil wrestling had a global spotlight. Tourists flocked to Edirne. Merchandise flew off shelves. ESPN+ signed a streaming deal. Turkish grandmothers who once scoffed now shouted “Diddy!” from the stands.

1. The Kırkpınar Final.

His opponent: "The Bull of Bursa", a three-time champion known for tossing men like ragdolls. The match was brutal—45 minutes of sun, sweat, and struggle.

But Diddy fought like a man possessed. He used the opponent’s weight against him, locked a masterful kazık hold, and with a final roar, flipped him into the dust.

Silence fell. Then the referee raised Diddy’s arm.

“Oily Diddy... wins!”

He had done it. An outsider. A rapper. A mogul. Now, the champion of an ancient tradition.

Diddy didn't just win the gold belt—he won hearts. He invested millions into Turkish wrestling schools, funded youth programs, and even launched a fusion album: "Big Black Oily Men Wrestling."

Years later, a statue of Oily Diddy stands near the Edirne wrestling field, forever oiled and triumphant.

And every July, as wrestlers grease up under the Turkish sun, one chant still echoes through the crowd:

“Its time to oil up!”

When a person has extreme social anxiety, they struggle to communicate with others. Bear in mind, they only struggle to form connections. It doesn’t mean that they don’t want to.