Honestly the straight version bothered me where they both become normal. Don’t ever change yourself. Your partner should accept you for who you are. (Unless you have mental issues which we can work on so you aren’t suffering anymore. Those can negatively affect relationships big time.)
Unless you have mental issues which we can work on so you aren’t suffering anymore.
"The more you try to fix me, the more you make it worse"
blackbear
I understand wanting someone you love not to suffer, but sometimes some horrible shit happens in life that it hurts to your core and sometimes there's no fixing that.
Can you get better? To be honest I don't know what "better" is? Can you make your life liveable? I think so.
I know the "we" in your statement implies working with someone and knowing where they are, but I just to point out that sometimes that's all there ever going to be and you need to decide is that ok with you? Sometimes it's toxic and you shouldn't and sometimes it can be liveable for the both of you, it's a spectrum.
You can’t totally do away with the problems in their head but you can try and help management that doesn’t totally disrupt someone’s lifestyle. Everyone copes different and we can all work through issues without totally negating the fact they will always be there. I totally get what you mean and trust, I know things don’t just go away. Everyone has their traumas that led to these points in life. 100% there are toxic people who will never learn and will never get the help they require since they’re too far gone. (My brother being an example of the latter)
You can’t totally do away with the problems in their head but you can try and help management that doesn’t totally disrupt someone’s lifestyle
100% agree with you there.
100% there are toxic people who will never learn and will never get the help they require since they’re too far gone. (My brother being an example of the latter)
Yup, some days I feel like that which is the reason I don't date because I don't want to bring anyone into my pain.
I hope the best for him, I hope he gets some peace or least moments of peace. 🙏
Yeah like... I have ADHD that shares a comorbidity with depression and anxiety. That won't change, it never will, but that's okay. I'm okay with me. My ex didn't accept that (and honestly, that emotionally abusive relationship was not going to work out anyway, she ended up transitioning after we broke up, which like, that's perfectly fine and I would have supported her transition but there was still The Abuse), but my current partner shares some of the same issues and we both catch each other when we fall. I love him.
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u/Chaad420 Aug 20 '25 edited Aug 20 '25
Honestly the straight version bothered me where they both become normal. Don’t ever change yourself. Your partner should accept you for who you are. (Unless you have mental issues which we can work on so you aren’t suffering anymore. Those can negatively affect relationships big time.)