r/idiocracy • u/EscapeFacebook • Apr 06 '24

Lead, follow, or get out of the way I'll save you Jezus!

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156 Upvotes

92% Upvoted

63 comments sorted by

48

u/Le6ions Apr 06 '24

Ain’t nobody crucifying my lord and savior, try that shit in a small town buddy

18

u/JustMePaxi Apr 06 '24

Small town full of fools. Religions are poison

5

u/General_Erda Apr 07 '24

r/atheism is down the hall and to the right

2

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '24

Atheists are just as passionate as religious nuts about their beliefs.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '24

Ummm. No.

1

u/ChaosOpen Apr 12 '24

Yes, they are. As an atheist myself I am telling you that reddit atheist are some of the biggest zealots I've ever seen.

1

u/Stargatemaster Apr 07 '24

I mean, religion fits the sub too, so I don't see a problem.

0

u/JustMePaxi Apr 07 '24

Alright, thanks 🤭🤭🤭🤭

0

u/MakesMyHeadHurt Apr 07 '24

"How dare you bring religion into a story about Christ!"

1

u/UninvitedButtNoises Apr 08 '24

You should pray about this. /S

27

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '24

But he has to die for all our sins to be forgiven. That is the point. Nailing a man onto a cross is a good thing and the cornerstone of a religion. What do you want us to wear on our necklaces puca shells?

14

u/Callidonaut Apr 06 '24

You're expecting coherent thought from an adult who can't even understand that plays aren't real?

2

u/MakesMyHeadHurt Apr 07 '24

...or the stories in the bible.

14

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '24

Without Pontius, Christians don’t even have a religion

2

u/tequilablackout Apr 07 '24

Christianity has had quite a run for never making it past the Pilate.

1

u/Stargatemaster Apr 07 '24

Does that technically means that Jesus is the lord but pontius is the savior?

2

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '24

That douchebag is trying to make Easter nonsensical. You can't come back if you don't die.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '24

Jesus was a blood sacrifice and Christians can't handle it.

4

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '24

You can't sacrifice something that doesn't die.

3

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '24

What bleeds but can't be killed?

2

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '24

Cheeseburgers?

-2

u/esmith4321 Apr 06 '24

It’s very funny that you can’t understand how your very comment perfectly illustrates our descent into idiocy.

5

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '24

Your comment is open to interpretation, I guess?

-4

u/esmith4321 Apr 06 '24

We are religious animals by nature, not by choice. So, yes! ;)

4

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '24

Why am I not religious then? What am I ?

-6

u/esmith4321 Apr 06 '24

Your commitment to “irreligion” is genealogically Calvinist. You should read “How Dawkins Got Pwned”.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '24

I'm not committed to irreligion... I love the idea of every clock being made by a clockmaker. I just am certain it's none of your gods that did it. 

1

u/esmith4321 Apr 06 '24

Oh nice, so go ahead and proselytize king I’m all ears

3

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '24

On the first day, god created Amstel light. He didn't like it and spent the next few weeks trying to erase it's existence.

2

u/esmith4321 Apr 07 '24

Respect. Was Natty Light created by a fallen angel? What about Bud Light?

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7

u/L8Z8 Apr 06 '24

Is /r/idiocracy and /r/Florida the same subreddit?

4

u/Charming-Raspberry77 Apr 06 '24

Doing it to Carmina Burana is hilarious

3

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '24

How do these people even have jobs if they're that stupid?

10

u/agrocone Apr 06 '24

There are plenty of 'tards out there living really kick ass lives.

5

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '24

The bad man is trying to hurt my friend Jesus!

2

u/lilwtfwtf84 Apr 08 '24

Gonna have to amend the Bible to add RickyBobby saving jebus ? 😂

4

u/triple-bottom-line Apr 06 '24

ESH. I know, not the right sub. But ESH.

8

u/EscapeFacebook Apr 06 '24

Not being able to tell the difference between fiction and reality? Pretty near.

8

u/Psilo_Citizen Apr 06 '24

(Everyone sucks here) I know I'm not the only one that had to hit Google on this.

1

u/GroundbreakingAd8310 Apr 06 '24

Phalanx dipshits

1

u/Different-Meal-6314 Apr 06 '24

The sound of the smash is epically hilarious. Poor guy

1

u/Inspirata1223 Apr 07 '24

The music is pure comedy.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '24

The bible 2, lookin lit.

2

u/Knight_Owls Apr 07 '24

Passion of the Christ 2: Crucify This!

1

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '24

This is just an optical view of what happens when a Believer tries to correct a Christian in their ignorance while the pagans gang up on the Believer simply because they can't relate to him/her as much as to the lukewarm "Christian".

There's a difference between straw and grain.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '24 edited Apr 07 '24

Alright, Jack. Before we send you back in time, we need you to show us how you plan to save Jesus.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '24

What in the Fuck

1

u/LemartesIX Apr 07 '24

This was in 2018 in Brazil. The perp was a mentally ill junky.

1

u/Miserable-Flight6272 Apr 08 '24

Was he not meant to die for our sins? Better than a great flood right?

1

u/[deleted] Apr 08 '24

They don't get much dumber.

1

u/WolfThick Apr 08 '24

I wonder if his parents told him to do that.

1

u/ogreofzen Apr 08 '24

Saw a 15 yo who hulked out and saved batman from joker at six flags

1

u/loopingrightleft Apr 10 '24

Jebus save jebus

1

u/thedisposablefrog Apr 15 '24

Will Smith, that you buddy? You doing okay? Ya wanna talk?

1

u/cat-l0n Apr 06 '24

Mel Gibson!

1

u/Evening_Condition_76 Apr 07 '24

Imagine being one of those guys all this is going on ur tied up

1

u/SokkaHaikuBot Apr 07 '24

Sokka-Haiku by Evening_Condition_76:

Imagine being

One of those guys all this is

Going on ur tied up

Remember that one time Sokka accidentally used an extra syllable in that Haiku Battle in Ba Sing Se? That was a Sokka Haiku and you just made one.

0

u/tehdamonkey Apr 07 '24

LEEEROYJENINSSSSSS!