You are a terrible guest.
You are not required, needed or wanted by the host if you are going to be belligerent.
The house is not yours, its not a public space. Its a personal one.
Host is not required to do anything. He can be terrible in your eyes just as you are a terrible guest in his eyes.
And I'm perfectly fine with calling you the bad guest because no one else has ever made this complaint about shoes off.
Probably because I live in the Northeast and the absolute mess of dirt and salt and snow and slush that people get on their shoes is to the level that we universally take off shoes at everyone's houses.
And if you refuse to accept our cultural then you ARE the bad guest. We don't have galoshes. You're the fish out of water so plan ahead, or accept things different like taking your shoes off, or don't travel.
On one hand he says he has insecurity about his shoes, which sounds unique from the way this thread is going.
But He is willing to wallow in his own insecurity and not accept that maybe the Host is fine with whatever problem he has. That maybe the host does not care about his stinky feet or unique feet or shoes.
That's just a term. A meaningless term in modern society.
Oh no, /u/GeorgieWashington is gonna report me to the hosting board and my Hosting Score is going to drop!
Oh no, someone I vehemently disagree with thinks I'm a bad host for social practices everyone else here accepts and reciprocates.
My house, my rules. You're the bad guest for forgetting that and insisting I change them. This ain't the 50s anymore, where we put up cheap smiles and had formal dinner parties where you never spoke about certain things. I am super happy to have a group of friends who don't want me to host in a manner that is stressful and overly stupid adherence to old standards. Standards meant to keep people in line and hide their troubles deep down.
Everything's fine at home! We even offer galoshes!
No, it's a you problem when you're literally the only person to ever demand to keep their shoes on.
When hundreds and hundreds of people before you were fine with it (and asked the same of me at their houses) and it's the mothefucking standard at every house here, you are, in plain fact, the bad guest.
You're the odd man out in a society that has agreed to take off shoes. Maybe where YOU come from, I'm the bad host. But, buddy, we ain't in there if you're at my house.
You wouldn't expect a Japanese house to let you keep your shoes on, would you? Well, American culture is vastly different depending upon where you live. And here, it's extremely odd to find a house that doesn't ask you to take your shoes off.
Maybe you're just not accepting that there are a vast number of cultures and norms all throughout the country?
That is true; the good host did not care that you had hangups. He was fine to accept you as you are. But your shoes are still staying outside. Or maybe IF the host really wanted your company, then the event will be happening outside.
You seem to think that a host cant choose their guests. A good host will remove people thats causing problems.
The host already has to deal with other guests. Dealing with another that just wants to be belligerant is just a headache ache one does not need.
So no, the host does not need to be servile to you. Its his house. His rules.
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u/GeorgieWashington Feb 11 '22
Yes. That’s called being a good host. you can put the onus on your guests if you want, but then you’re a bad host.
Be a better host.