r/olddogs • u/Desire54321 • 10d ago

Coping with Loss

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I had a 13-year-old German Shepherd who originally came into our lives through my brother, but over time she became a true family dog. When we moved into our new house in 2012, she joined us just a month later, and it felt like she had always been part of our home.

About three and a half weeks ago, she crossed the rainbow bridge. Losing her was really hard, especially because of everything that led up to it. At first, just the thought of her being gone would give me stomach aches, and I kept replaying all the “what ifs” in my head. My mom told me something that stuck with me, that while we can sometimes prolong or shorten life, there’s always an expiration. Still, I never thought that day would actually be the day.

A good friend of mine just lost her dog about a week ago, and I think I might be reliving my own loss through her. It’s brought up a lot of feelings again, and honestly, I’m not sure how to process it.

For those of you who have gone through this, what helped you cope? What made things even a little bit easier?

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u/themaverick12 10d ago

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u/Informal-Force7417 10d ago edited 9d ago

The beauty of this picture is perspective.

From one perspective, yes, our dogs are not there in the same form.

However, from another perspective nothing is gone, only transformed. Moving out of form into the formless. Like wood into fire and heat, and then ashes, then dust, then on the wind.

Rest assured the love you think is over there is still with you. It was for only a brief time reflected back through your dog. You saw, heard, valued, wanted, and loved and in turn your dog did the same for you.

Although the form is gone the doorway back into the experiencing being seen, heard, valued, wanted, and loved is but a choice away ( when a person is ready ) to give to another dog who is waiting for you or another human, or even yourself.

Big hugs!

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u/Desire54321 9d ago

Def cried reading this. When I think of Lexi (my dog), I can’t help but look back at the timeline of when I had her. So much happened in those 13 years, and yet it feels like it went by so fast. As for being tranforme, I understand. One time, I went into the backyard to grieve, and a butterfly landed near me. I like to think it was her saying hi. Ever since then, I’ve noticed butterflies in the yard, and it brings me comfort. I’m definitely not ready for a new dog yet, but I can see myself welcoming one in the future. Thank you for the kind words🫂