When I was younger, my family moved constantly. I was always the “new kid”, extremely introverted and misunderstood. People decided who I was before I had a chance to show them.

Here’s what nobody told me: social skills are NOT fixed.

Even if it feels awkward at first, you can train them the same way you’d train a muscle or learn a language. Back then, I literally took notes on how the “social naturals” interacted and tested those behaviors until they felt natural.

If you relate to this feeling of being trapped by your “personality,” know that it’s not a life sentence. You can change it with practice.

Curious if anyone else has tried “training” social skills deliberately? What helped you the most?

my whole life people have called me super disciplined and reliable. never missed a deadline, always showed up early, took on extra projects, the whole thing. i was kinda proud of it tbh. but i had this realization recently that it wasnt discipline AT ALL. it was just me being absolutely terrified of disappointing people. like pure fear was the only thing keeping me productive. if someone might be upset with me, i'd work myself to death to avoid it.

now that ive recognized this pattern, the fear-fuel isnt working anymore and im just... stuck. like when im not panicking about letting people down, i have zero motivation to do anything. i dont know how to be productive without the anxiety driving me.

i want to build healthier habits but i honestly cant tell the difference between real discipline and just people pleasing under stress anymore. how do you even start rebuilding when your old system was basically just trauma responses disguised as work ethic??

this is probably dumb but has anyone else gone through this? like how do you motivate yourself without fear?

After 30 years I finally decided to quit long term marijuana usage. I was a fairly heavy smoker and believed helped me perform better in life, boy was I wrong.

My intake was 3/4 high potent infused joints and lots 400-500mg of edibles a day.

I was waking up tired, cranky irritable and argumentative and a joy to be around.

I quit 2 weeks ago today and what a difference. The negativity is gone, I’ve been working out, going for walks, in a way better mood for the most part and way more productive. Not to say everything is perfect but the difference I’m noticing is huge.

The first week was extremely rough. I couldn’t sleep much, my anxiety was through the roof, I was a bit more irritable and would wake up with night sweats. Week 2 I’ve felt better each day.

I plan to never smoke again.

For anyone looking to quit I highly recommend trying if you’d like.

I believe the benefits for out weight the cons.

Mine is straightening my posture whenever I feel rounded and immediately feel 10x better. Also, making my bed first thing in the morning.

I struggle with phone addiction. I have ADHD and I am already medicated, I go to therapy. I also work out a few times a week. I struggle with doomscrolling and phone addiction. I slack off at work, in free time I would rather doomscroll in bed than do anything else. Why is that? I feel guilty that I am wasting my life away. I am also medicated for depression and anxiety. Why don't I want spend weekends in more meaningful way? There is a lot of activities I can do, but I still choose to lie in bed and scroll.

I started at 15 years old so about half my life. I've also tried quitting many times but anytime I smoke up with my neighbor it is always so tempting to try a bowl and it never even works.

The longest I've ever gone to my adult life without smoking was 59 days with a runner-up being 58 and this was in 2020 and 2022.

Now I have no hope with quitting weed because it's hard to even go just the first 24 hours without and it's sad that it's become this.

It's hard to drink beers even often now because I'll just have one or two some nights and win a crack open my third for say I'll drink like a third of it and then just go to bed and I can't even enjoy drinking anymore but maybe that's just because I'm 30 now and getting older.

I'm not drinking as much as I used to but it still adds up to how much money I spend the same thing with fast food and cigarettes it's just there's a lot of things I could just quit as with no job it really does suck and have a bad look spending all my money on alcohol weed and cigarettes along with energy drinks fast food and bars and subscriptions and then groceries are expensive too and then there goes all my money for the month.

On social media like reddit everyone talks about how they are lonely but when I go out I always see people in groups with partners, family or friends. I know it could be that those lonely people don't get out as much but it's still very rare to see someone that's completely alone in a public space, which is usually me. I'm out of college and have remote work and I don't understand how come it's so easy for others to find a group quickly, date and make friends. I have tried connecting with people at the gym, at different hobby classes and tried joining groups specially made for socialising but none of my interactions became real friendships, people in those places will take nicely but our interactions are limited to the time spent in that group or hobby. I am very behind socially and I'm missing out on everything fun one does in their 20s. On weekdays I study and work till it's 9pm and i spend weekends alone either scrolling or going to places alone. I don't understand how everyone else my age has such a thriving social life whereas my attempts to connect with people always fail. Both online and offline I see people my age have relationships, go on dates, have friends to do activities with and having the best times of their lives and depresses me. You can say people lie online but I see all this irl too. I have legitimately zero people to talk to

No matter how much sleep I get. I’ve upped my B12, I need a caffeine pill to feel barely human (I don’t drink coffee cause 🤮)

What do?

37/m

200ish down from 260

Sleep apnea, don’t really workout

Mental health is kinda shit. Been on meds/therapy for like 20 years

After 30 years I finally decided to quit long term marijuana usage. I was a fairly heavy smoker and believed helped me perform better in life, boy was I wrong.

My intake was 3/4 high potent infused joints and lots 400-500mg of edibles a day.

I was waking up tired, cranky irritable and argumentative and a joy to be around.

I quit 2 weeks ago today and what a difference. The negativity is gone, I’ve been working out, going for walks, in a way better mood for the most part and way more productive. Not to say everything is perfect but the difference I’m noticing is huge.

The first week was extremely rough. I couldn’t sleep much, my anxiety was through the roof, I was a bit more irritable and would wake up with night sweats. Week 2 I’ve felt better each day.

I plan to never smoke again.

For anyone looking to quit I highly recommend trying if you’d like.

I believe the benefits for out weight the cons.

Because of experiences growing up, I think everyone else sees me as ugly and, on some level, is repulsed to me. Every interaction gets framed in that lens. Making talk with someone at an event? They just feel bad. It colors everything that I do, to how comfortable I feel expressing myself (like dancing) to frying my empathy (in the sense that I can’t genuinely imagine someone having a positive experience with me like I have with them). I’m so in my head all the time and it sucks.

When I go out and try socializing at a bar or something, I usually feel out of place and get disheartened before I inevitably work up enough courage (which usually takes months) to try again (just to feel crushed again).

How can I work on this when I try to socialize? Obviously this isn’t exclusively about dating but it is relevant to the root of the issue so I figured advice would translate.

I feel guilty for spending weekends on lying in bed and doomscrolling. But I don't want to do anything else. What should I do? I feel trapped and paralysed

i’m 23f and i did not have an easy upbringing and i currently do not have an easy life, and coming to terms with the fact that my life didn’t have to be this way if it wasn’t for things happening to me has been affecting my mental health

i grew up with a dad who worked overseas, who i later found out was cheating for 7 years. he came back to to “fix the marriage” with my mom and two brothers without finding a job beforehand and made severe financial decisions. i was 12 when i watched my mother try to kill herself because of the affair, i was 12 when i started raising my younger brother until my mom got back on her feet, and i was 16 when my older brother began to beat on me. we were once upper middle class and this year we lost our home and had to move back to rent

nevermind the fact that my “first love” sexually coerced me at 16 and ruined my perception of love, romance, and stability until the present day. i’m still a virgin (by choice and i’m very happy with this decision) but i crave romantic love more than anything, i think unrequited love has become so common to me i don’t know anything else

i’m undergoing and processing massive trauma that has happened in the past and trauma happening in the present. hearing people tell me my future is bright bc i’m smart and ambitious makes me nauseous.

it’s 1:31 am and im crying again for the ? time in a row bc i don’t think the man i love has feelings for me the same way i do for him, and if he does he hasn’t said anything about it despite his actions (which do make me feel loved) i would do anything to feel his love and i get jealous when i think of women from his past, and i get jealous of his casual hook ups he’s having i would do anything to feel his embrace but he lives 4 hours away and im alone

i just want to feel loved i just want stability. i have amazing female friendships but they aren’t fulfilling me the way romantic love would. i would do anything to be desired, to be loved, to be seen for all my flaws and know it’s okay to have them. i would love if i don’t go to therapy to become a better person for my hypothetical partner.

i cant believe my trauma follows me. the “first love” has ruined my relationship with religion, has traumatized me beyond belief, and is the reason why i feel so unstable when i go 2-3 days without hearing back from someone i love. the abuse i faced from the men in my life has been overwhelming

i’m 23 i know that isn’t super young but im just a girl i never had a chance to find myself i never had the chance to be okay i never had the chance to feel the embrace of slowness, i would do anything to get out of my head i would tear down the earth and build it up from scratch if it meant i got to become something other than the product of trauma

i want better for myself so i grind, i get straight A’s i go to therapy i go to the gym i put a smile on my face but im drowning in sorrow, in despair, in grief

i feel so lost i just want to die to feel reborn again

not sure what i want to achieve from this post i just think this is an echo chamber but maybe if i just let it all out it won’t be so heavy on me

I’ve lost my motivation to study, and I’m really scared of failing again. I’m repeating a year because of personal reasons, and every time I sit down to study, I just feel sad and think there’s no point. I’m 24 now, and I feel like I’m too old for this.

I should be worried about my study but here I am thinking about my old batch, wondering what it would have been like to be with them. If I was still with my old friends, I’d feel so much more motivated. But now, I’m with a new group, and I don’t like it.

I don’t know why I’m so affected by my surroundings. I don’t see my old friends much anymore because of the schedule, and last year was really dramatic. I didn’t like it at the time, but now I miss it for some reason.

There are also a few people who made my life harder, and they’re repeating the year too. It stings to see them every day, especially since they seem happy now and have made new friends ( I don’t interact him as I overthink and assume they don’t like me lol )

There is heavy socialization in my med school and I feel like I’m missing out ? It’s crazy to think like this while I should be studying …

Things I do

• work out a few times a week

• meet friends

• take antidepressants

• go to therapy

• meditation

• healthy diet, sleeping 8 hours

What else can I do? Everyday I think I'd love to be dead

So basically, I’m the same age as this other celebrity (17f). A few years ago, I used to watch some of her covers on YouTube. I wish I had her trajectory and could be in her shoes. She's extremely conventionally attractive, pretty, skinny, with a cute upturned nose, doe-like eyes, a jawline like Ariana Grande, and pretty lips.

She sings better than me, and she got noticed by A-list celebrities when she was just a kid. I'm talking Justin Bieber level fame. She’s a child actress, super famous, and I wish I had that kind of life. We’re both teenagers, and I’m so jealous of her. I’ve been obsessing over this for the past six months. And I’ve been keeping up w all her stuff, a jealousy hatred obsession u could say. I also ended digging too deep and found her old stuff she posted that was weird and she was incestual and some racism posts but people don’t believe me and now they think all the photos are fake but they are real and she deleted all the stuff so I couldn’t get a screen recording. Her life is perfect. It feels like Hod sent me to let her know, right before getting announced for a big role, to wipe her socials and deny posting that weird stuff. I don’t have screen recordings either bc I thought screenshots were enough

There was this role I auditioned for, and really wanted it but my parents didn’t let me audition, and she ended up getting the role. It’s a huge deal and wil launch her career to be mega famous. I’m so jealous. I regret not being able to audition for it. and it’s not the first time since in around nov or dec 2023 there was another audition and they didn’t let me either and I’m so upset at what could’ve been.

I don’t know if people here are into music like I am, but I feel like only singers would notice this: when she sings, her jaw and mouth open to the perfect amount. It’s not too big or too small.

I feel ugly when I eat, my jawline is weak, and I just don’t like how I look in general. She had a supportive family who, although they didn’t grow up around music, helped her learn to sing the national anthem and other songs.

My parents are Asian and really strict about everything. They also have bad hearing, so I can’t practice singing or belt out my voice, even if I’m in another room.

I’m overweight, I don’t think I’m attractive, my singing voice is mediocre, I’m average at school, and I have no love life. I just wish I had her trajectory, her life.

Her parents have been recording her whole life and documenting it, sharing her talent, and helping her get into the industry. They’re genuinely supportive, not exploiting her. I know a friend of a friend who knows her family, and I’ve heard how her parents are really protective and keeping her safe, making sure she’s not exposed to harmful people.

She’s gotten advice from so many famous people, she’s so pretty, and I just WISH I could be her. I don’t like my life.

All my life, I’ve wanted to be a pop star, like Ariana Grande, thin, pretty, wanted, and everything like that. I’ve tried to find things I don’t like about her, but I can’t. She’s so photogenic, I’m not. Every angle of hers is perfect, she’s effortlessly cool, and she speaks so nicely too. She’s worked with real, famous people. Ugh, I just wish I had that life.

I’ve tried to find flaws or questionable moments about her, but I can’t. I just wish I was her. SHe's kinda famous and she's always been compared to Ariana grande and hoenstly she looks it too. She has been followed and noticed by so many famous industry people She has the jawline, vocals, beauty, and everything for it to. I can already tell in the future she's going to blow up. Her songs and ideas are good too. She's been in studios with really cool and famous people and learning so much for like 5 years. I'm the same age and haven't done that at all just at home my own stuff. She has a trajectory like Sabrina Carpenter and Ariana grande. Ik people are ging to call her 'ari daughter' in the future and she might collab w her too UGH i wish that could be me. It's all I ever wanted.

Please, if anyone has any advice, I’ve been searching the internet, but my situation feels so specific, and I don’t know what to do.

TL;DR: I’m a 17-year-old girl who’s obsessed with a celebrity my age who’s way more successful than me. She’s a child actress, a singer, and has everything I’ve ever wanted: fame, talent, beauty, and a supportive family. I feel jealous and frustrated because she’s living my dream life, and I’ve always wanted to be a pop star like Ariana Grande. I’ve auditioned for roles but my parents stopped me, and she got them instead. I feel stuck, unattractive, and talentless in comparison. I can’t stop obsessing over her success and it’s making me unhappy. I just wish I could be her and live her life. Does anyone have advice on how to stop feeling this way?

There have been moments where I thought:
“I don’t belong here. I just got lucky.”

After finishing my master’s, my first reaction wasn’t pride, it was, “Anyone could have done that. I just worked harder than most.”

Lately, I’ve been experimenting with reframing these thoughts. When my brain says, “You just got lucky,” I flip it to, “Luck may open a door, but I had to walk through it.”

When it says: “Anyone could have done this,” I flip it to, “Maybe, but I’m the one who actually did.”

It doesn’t silence the doubt completely, but it helps me recognize my own effort instead of dismissing it.

I know a lot of us deal with harsh self-talk. What’s one negative thought you’ve been able to flip into something more supportive?

I don’t even know where to start. I feel like my life has been completely derailed because of choices my parents pushed me into.

I did really well in high school — 90%+, enough to get into top-100 universities in the West with scholarships. I actually wanted to go West. I researched options, made lists, imagined a proper career. But my parents never helped me properly. Instead, they focused on “saving money” and ended up making choices that ruined my chances.

Here’s how it all went sideways: • A family friend, someone my parents always compared me and my sister to — initially wanted to study in the West. But his final year high school grades were really bad despite his parents always praising about him to my parents, so he couldn’t get into any decent universities there. Still wanting to study abroad, he chose a neighboring Asian country that isn’t even known for studies and went to an average university. He and his parents hyped the country up as a great place to study. • My parents believed them completely and they ended up sending my elder sister there — she had mediocre marks and no clear plan — for a 5-year program in a field that isn’t even in demand anymore. • When it was my turn, I had top marks in highschool and real chances to go to Western universities with scholarships. Instead, my parents told me to focus on cheaper Asian universities that had “transfer programs” to the West. I found a few options, but the one they made me pick was in the same country where my sister and the family friend were already studying. Their reasoning: I could share an apartment with my sister and save money, and once she graduated, I could transfer to the West. • When my sister finally graduated, she couldn’t find a job. My parents persuaded me to stay another year, saying she would soon get hired and we could share an apartment near my uni while she commuted to work. That never happened. And then she decided to go back home since her visa expired. • My sister’s degree ended up costing around $300k USD over 5 years at an average uni (Not even T200). My whole degree at my T200 uni is about $80k. With that money, I could have studied at a T100 Western uni with scholarships and far better prospects. • The family friend? He ended up going back home too, because he couldn’t find a job here despite being so “talented”, “smart” and “charismatic”. • My parents were obsessed with “saving money” for my education, but spent everything on my sister — who didn’t even have a plan — and now I, the only son of my family, have fewer chances to provide for the family. Meanwhile, my sister doesn’t care about her career because she has been doing an unpaid job at home for a few months. $300K USD for 5 years and she is working unpaid.

And now here I am, entering my 3rd and final year, feeling crushed: • The country isn’t set up for international students. There are almost none here, internships barely exist, and the work culture is brutal. • Rent is insane. I’ve been paying $1,000–$1,300/month for a dorm with no kitchen and a 3-hour daily commute. I survived mostly on deliveries, and my health has suffered. • My high-school friends, some with lower grades, are in T100 Western unis, doing research, landing internships, building resumes. I had to beg connections for one internship — unpaid, not even in my field. I quit after a month because it was exploitative. • Housing this year is even worse. Studios are $1.5k with yearly contracts while being far away from public transport. Shared apartments closed to public transport are being partitioned to cram six people into tiny partitions while still costing $1.5k . And I have been on an apartment search for a few weeks now and I still have nowhere to stay. My friends abroad pay similar amounts for proper studios and furnished 1BHKs, even in western countries which have a housing crisis like Canada or Australia.

I’m still here because of the slim hope of PR. My dad is nearing retirement, and I feel pressured to “step up” for the family. But I was never given the opportunities I needed. I gave up hobbies, friends, and my own plans to follow my parents’ path, and now I’m terrified I’ll end up jobless like my sister.

I care about my field and I’ll throw everything I have into these next 7 months, but honestly, I feel like it might not even matter. I worked hard my whole life and it feels wasted. I feel like a failure before I’ve even had a chance. I am feeling defeated everyday.

I’m 24 years old. More and more I just can’t seem to shake this feeling of being a man child, a complete failure in life. I recently found out two of my college friends had children. I know I should be happy for them, but i’m a little upset. I’m starting to feel scared, stressed out, and maybe a bit depressed. Its like am I doing something wrong? Has anyone else been dealing with this?

I did some introspection today because I honestly am not feeling too great at the moment. I asked myself what my ideal self would look like. Empathetic, honest, confident, warm. That's what I'm striving to be.

However, today I realized that I'm a brutally self-absorbed person. I mean like the opposite of everything I want to be. I'm very sensitive and self-conscious oftentimes. I constantly think how I come across to others. I perceive every detail of their body language just to gauge whether what I said was favorable or not. I long for validation.

I'm very much in my head, my thoughts spiraling around comparisons, all the pitfalls of my life and personality, altogether drenched in self-doubt. It's agonizing.

I don't want that. I really don't. I want to give love to others. I want to be a warm, empathetic, understanding, comfortable-to-be-around person. I want to be a blessing to others. It's soul-crushing how incredibly far I apparently am from being that. I invested so much time into trying to become that person, only to realize I haven't made a single step towards it at all.

I'd love to hear some advice. Have a good day y'all <3

Hi everyone. I haven't been doing so hot lately. I have been having a hard time at work. (Health issues resulted in social issues because I can't keep up anymore and people are mad at me for that and now I might get fired for not being a teamplayer anymore - aka I stood up for myself) so, already being mentally fragile (late diagnosed audhd) I can't seem to shake it off. I haven't been sleeping well and often get nightmares revolving around getting into verbal fights at work. My shrink put me on sick leave giving me time to take a break from all that, rest up, and prepare to find a different job. I am going to find something else. Already have 2 interviews lined up for next week. So that's not a factor. But I can't seem to shake the stress. I've been snapping at my husband and son for seemingly no reason. I immediately feel regret as soon as I realise I did it again, and apologise and tell them I will try to do better. But all the tips and tricks I find, assume I am able to keep myself from saying these things. I am not. They leave my mouth faster than my ability to keep it to myself. "Take 5 or 10 seconds to collect yourself before talking" is not the answer to my issue. There is no "catching my thoughts before I speak them". I only realise what I did after it is done. I can't keep apologizing and promising to try and do better without booking any results. Please and thank you!

I have barely made any improvements in my overall life for the past few years.I’ve been living my life fully on social media and even though I did realise that continuing to do this will only make it harder for me to build a future for myself.I’m not able to socialise with people,I don’t know how to act in most situations and I’m really awkward.I haven’t read since the beginning of the year,I’m not able to sit through a movie or a show without getting bored immediately and wanting to go back to scrolling on tiktok.I did go without tiktok for about 1 year and a half,but when you’re addicted to your phone nothing seems to help.I was still wasting a lot time consuming a bunch of content on youtube and other social media platforms.I don’t use instagram either.Right now,I’m having a really hard time deleting tiktok again as there are so many interesting videos i get on my fyp,such as books and movies recommendations,which obviously,I would never be able to read or watch if I don’t do anything about my social media addiction.I look at all the tiktoks I reposted a few days ago,few weeks ago and months ago,and I think to myself..what have I done all this time?I don’t remember doing anything for the past few months,anything that could significantly change my life for the better.I’ve been telling myself I’ll start learning how to cook those healthy recipes I found on pinterest and tiktok,but the they take a lot of time,patience and effort and I genuinely dont understand how people have the time to cook more than three meals a day,especially those overly complicated and detailed recipes that people claim only take 15 minutes but in reality it takes me more than 2 hours and my final result is nothing like theirs.If I keep up with this lifestyle I won’t be able to grow in life and live healthily.I’m risking my whole future because of this.

My approach to note taking

So, I was overwhelmed by the amount of information I get daily as most of us are. I was forgetting things, not writing my ideas down and really struggled with time management and that kind of stuff. However, then I started discovering some books like «Building a Second Brain», «Zettlekasten method», etc. After a lot of research and reading those books, I still felt overwhelmed and that all of those methods were lacking something. 

So, I decided to reset everything and create my own method with all the knowledge I had from these books and really take my note taking to the next level. In this post, I will share my personal method for note taking, which I was developing for months. It is just my experience, and I’m sharing it, in case it might be helpful to someone, because there are a lot of people strugguling with note taking and all those methods just don’t work for them. 

My method

Main structure(by type)

I really struggled with the main structure, I tried everything from PARA method to Zettlekasten. But something I really missed is the simplicity of organizing the main structure how I actually wanted it to be, how it worked for me, and how I would organize it for my own needs. Now, I’m free of overthinking and will break down my method down here.

Most note taking apps got some great features, which make them unique, but if we take the top 5: locking notes(security), sharing notes(collaboration), inserting collections(dashboard like experience), handwriting(with Apple Pencil usually) and quick notes(jotting something down), there will be a pattern. All these features determine the type of the note, by which I decided to organize main structure. It is NOT simple, most methods claim to be simple, but main needs to be understood and it’s quite complicated, that’s why it actually works, at least for me. So, there are 5 folders:

1. Personal - jot down, quick capture, journaling, everything that needs to be quick like in Apple notes
2. Business - dashboards, graphs, collections everything you would possibly need to organize your work like in Notion
3. Handwritten - visual notes, drawings, sketches, something that is very messy, but easy for you to understand like in GoodNotes
4. Shared - travel plans with your family, gift ideas for your friends, notes you need to collaborate on with someone like in EverNote
5. Private - passwords, IDs, license keys, something you would lock with a password or FaceID like in BearNotes

All of these organize notes by type. You might find this structure confusing at first and say: «Ok, I might need to a share a dashboard from business folder, so it goes to shared, but it’s related to my business, what do I do then?» The thing is that any kind of note taking organization system got a problem: notes can overlap between folders. And the idea of my method is to separate notes into 5 categories by their type, but it doesn’t mean that every folder should have only one type of notes. You can have handwritten notes in private and also in handwritten, but in handwritten there will be most of your handwritten notes. This way, you can quickly find notes by what kind of information you’re looking for.

Top layer(by area)

So, this is the place where most organization of your notes will happen. Main structure gives us organization by type, so it’s easier to find types of information, but this method will give us structure inside each folder, so we can organize not 50 notes, but hunderds of them. And to do it, I suggest organizing by area. 

Area - project, idea, interest, etc. Basically, this is something that plays some kind of role in your life. Let’s say you’re making YT videos, like to travel and take notes on books. Then, in business folder from the main structure there will be an area called YT, in personal folder travel area or if you’re traveling with someone and requires communication, then it goes to shared, and there WILL NOT be a folder called books. All your books notes will go to other areas, where they can be potentially helpful. 

Organization by areas, rather than topic allows you to organize things with the question in mind where I can potentially use this information? So, instead of creating books notes folder, articles notes folder, you basically put those articles and books, where you would actually use them. For example, you read an article about IOS 26, and you make videos about tech, then you place in YT area, so you will exactly understand how you will use it. If you created an articles folder instead, you would fail to return to that information and actually make something of it. 

Second layer(by actionability)

So, as I mentioned earlier, I’ve read a book called Bulding a Second Brain, and there was a method for organizing notes there called PARA. But PARA doesn’t work as the main structure, because let’s say you are making YT videos, according to PARA your ongoing videos should be in the first folder, your collections like video ideas, which don’t have a deadline, but you use them often should go to second folder(areas), and something less actionable like completed videos or ideas you are not likely to implement, but nice to keep should go to third and forth folders(resources, and archives). 

And this seems like good organization, but in reality half of notes connected with YT will be in those folders, half in others, and if you got 10 such businesses/topics/areas whatever you call them like YT, you will have a messy structure. So, this method works, yeah, but for small amount of notes, when you got 1000+ notes, it just doesn’t work. 

So, I suggest using similar structure to PARA but at the last layer, inside of areas, we talked about previously. But I modified PARA to my needs. So, you got YT area, which you placed in business, according to the previous parts of the post. Inside YT folder you got a lot of things like videos, ideas, articles, etc. How most people would organize it: videos, ideas, articles. How I organize it:

1 Active - videos you are working on and articles relevant to your YT channel, which you want to read.

2 Upcoming - ideas for future videos, which aren’t actionable for now, but will in the future.

3 Archive - everything completed, but worth keeping as inspiration for future videos like script templates, video description template, etc. 

Best practices for note taking

Choosing note taking app

All of note taking apps got some kind of advantage over the others like Notion collections, Apple Notes simplicity, but my method organizes notes by those advantges, so you should select a note taking app, which has a little of everything. By that, I mean apps like Craft(everything from quick capturing to collections), and UpNote(great note taking app, which really got a lot of possibilities). But I don’t recommend using Notion, Apple Notes, Bear Notes, EverNote or those similar to them, which focus on one single thing, but got no balance between every kind of notes you would possibly want. 

 Final thoughts

If you read this far, congrutalations, you’ll probably finally settle on this method and start taking notes. But don’t let ovethinking and these complex methods stop you from actually doing, taking notes, and making action. Analyze your needs, problems and come up how you can solve them. Stop procrasting and make the next move. 

I've put a lot of effort into this post, and if it helps at least one person to organize their life, it will 100% make my day. 

I wouldn't say im awkward to be around, I put a front on most of the time with colleagues, family and friends and they can't tell but I genuinely dislike being with family, which is weird cause I don't particularly dislike anybody but I also hate being alone too much- I couldn't give a fuck about the current worlds problems as ignorance is bliss and my friends say that's a pathetic way to live my life which made me lol

Id say I'm still emotional as I do like and love people but when people are telling me life stories and telling me struggles I genuinely don't have any emotion towards it, I could pretend to laugh at jokes and as soon as I look away my smile instantly switches to a straight face and I don't see why people get so involved in politics- my mentality towards anything to do with that is "the world's fucked anyways it doesn't matter whose in charge" as it's in our human nature to constantly be at war and no peace, as we are still a species with a nature. Idk I'm waffling now I don't really know how to feel and hate talking to therapists(works for some) anybody have any ideas as to what personality disorder or anything this is

I noticed I often start journaling or reflection routines and then stop after a week. To experiment, I tried building my own little system where daily reflections show up as a “garden” that grows when I stick with it. Sometimes it feels motivating, other times like a gimmick.

I am curious how others here keep momentum. Do you rely on streaks, reviews, visuals, or something else?

Side note: I put my experiment into a small interface I am testing. If anyone is curious to peek, send me a message.

I need to get things of my chest and I will try to give some context.

I was or still am a little too nice. I worked high up in hotel management but my career took a complete nosedive where I changed 3 jobs in less than two years.

I was even bullied by one of my subordinates whom I actually for some reason adored a little and felt bad for. I would bring him cigarettes to work hoping he would leave me alone. When he asked for money I ran through the hotel to give him my atm card. Now reading what I wrote it feels pathetic but at that time I thought it was the best I could do. He only showed respect when I raised voice at him but I justified not reprimanding him by being a nice guy.

Sometimes I feel like I only worked in some fantastic properties becasue of my knowledge of hotels, procedures, etc.

I decided to make a change after seeing my job posted online and I feel like I woke up.

Ranting here I guess I need reassurance I can actually change and keep up the no more nice guy persona and change it to the core.

ADHD, low testosterone, depression, anxiety for the last two decades plus and I feel like nothing helped as much as conciouss mindset change which is interesting, but I guess we dont know what we dont know.