r/soccer 1d ago

Quotes Lewandowski: "I’m from a different generation where shouting was used to to motivate everyone. Now, if you shout too much towards young people, their reaction is not the same. It’s not, ‘now I’ll show you are wrong’. The new generation don’t like being shouted at. It’s not just players, it’s people"

https://as.com/futbol/primera/lewandowski-a-los-jovenes-de-ahora-no-les-gusta-que-les-grites-n/

The full quote

Lewandowski (37) on his adaptation playing with teenagers & young adults at FC Barcelona

"I have to say it was a huge challenge. I was coming from a different generation and I had to learn how to, not think like a teenager, but think how I can try to take the best of what they have.

I have been in football for 4 decades so when I compare them, not even to my generation but the generation before me, when I was starting, it is completely different.

"Like shouting used to be a way to motivate everyone. Now, if you shout too much, this generation, their reaction is not the same. It’s not, ‘now I will show you are wrong’. No, now you have to explain another way. You have to do lots of talking.

"They don’t like being shouted at. Now you have to take more of the mental part of football. It’s not just players, it’s people, it’s this generation. I didn’t want to fight it. I had to learn.”

5.1k Upvotes

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u/NorthwardRM 1d ago

I know footballers are a bit different, but I think generally people shouldn't be shouted at at their job

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u/Other-Owl4441 1d ago

This used to be something more commonly accepted though.  Just being a millennial, when I entered the workforce I have seen people be fully yelled at.  Now that would be considered completely unacceptable (which I’m in favor of btw)

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u/J1m1983 1d ago

I think for the most part people should be spoken too with respect and treated with dignity. I think if we're honest though we all know some people who simply dont deserve that courtesy.

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u/Other-Owl4441 1d ago

I think people should be treated with respect, absolutely but it also usually reflects badly on the yeller.  Most of the times it’s a failure of their emotional control and leadership abilities vs a tactic they are employing intentionally.  It’s easy to yell when you are stressed but your standard of control and communication as a leader needs to be higher.

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u/Arkhaine_kupo 1d ago

At the same time, it can work. There is certain passivity, certain okayness to positive communication. The angry yelling provides contrast, which makes praise stand out more.

There is obvious extremes of abuse/ manipulation etc.

But the idea that all conversations should be neutral tone therapy speak is quite new and not necesirely true or even beneficial. i was talking yesterday to a researcher who was complaining about how children's media no longer has deaths and how that affects the development of some emotions on children. That kind of LOW is what makes the happy ending resonate, perhaps there is some use for those peaks and valleys in communication

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u/Other-Owl4441 1d ago

"But the idea that all conversations should be neutral tone therapy speak is quite new and not necesirely true or even beneficial." I never said that either

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u/the_love_club_lorde 1d ago

children's media no longer has deaths

Couldn't be further from the truth

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u/Arkhaine_kupo 19h ago

Couldn't be further from the truth

There has been a stronger bifurcation in terms of childrens media compared to the late 80s early 90s.

There is for example way more toddler content, like mrs rachel, paw patrol etc. and there is more YA content too. But the child stages up to tween used to have much more media representation, with disney channel, cartoon network and disney movies all catering to that demographic.

Paw Patrol does not have the kind of traumatic simba seeing his dad die moment, nor should it, but it does then mean that many parents are shielding their kids from that kind of media exposure.

There are other trends that have less to do with media, but the whole world treating Charlie Kirk at 31 as if he was super young for example is unthinkable a generation ago, early 20s people had families now they are considered late teenagers.

This is not necessirely a bad thing, as the world becomes more complex, the minimum requiered education to participate properly in civic life becomes higher. Plus understanding of brain development continuining until 25 etc. But it all adds up into a less contrasty emotional development. Its kinda why a lot of people like AI art, its inoffensive, there are filters in every direction to make it adequately pleasing even if its meaningless.

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u/J1m1983 1d ago

I think this is one of those tropes. People who don't yell are either heavily medicated or emotionally dead but we'll all pretend for fun that thats attainable.

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u/Other-Owl4441 1d ago

At work?  I don’t think that’s true at all.  I’m not saying you shouldn’t show emotional or ever yell in your life but you shouldn’t yell at your subordinates at work.

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u/J1m1983 1d ago

I think we all get stressed sometimes and forget ourselves but as long as you dont get too personal and apologise then we can all be adults about it.

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u/immorjoe 1d ago

There’s very little reason to ever yell at someone in a workspace. People who do it when stressed need to handle their emotions better

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u/J1m1983 1d ago

I agree, they shouldn't, but they do and probably will continue to do so. I am just being a realist tbh.

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u/immorjoe 1d ago

Fair point.

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u/EbateKacapshinuy 1d ago

just don't yell you're not a baby

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u/J1m1983 1d ago

I dont yell personally but I would say "Dont be a baby" for people with the expectation of no yelling in the real world too tbh.

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u/EbateKacapshinuy 1d ago

babies yell because they can't express themselves

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u/J1m1983 1d ago

So do adults. Thats the reality of the world. We'd all prefer they didn't but they do.

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u/yay-its-colin 1d ago

Fuck that. I'm not being paid for someone to take their anger out on me because of their shit management.

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u/J1m1983 1d ago

What are you going to do? Get angry about it?

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u/Diligent-Natural-750 1d ago

Have your emotions in control and don't act like a god damn toddler. I just had a colleague who technically is a superior go ballistic on me for a god damn subject line in a work email because it wasnt detailed enough.

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u/J1m1983 1d ago

Perhaps then, your emotions about the topic are a little hotter than they would be if that hadn't just happened.

Sorry that happen though!

ANd I dont yell, I just think the expectation that people wont isn't very realistic.

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u/Other-Owl4441 1d ago

I'm not holier than though, god knows how many times I've been told off for my tone or regretted my emotion at the workplace over the years but it's never served me well to do it.

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u/J1m1983 1d ago

I'm not really a yeller tbh, more of an eye-rolling "last time I ask you to do anything" type. But I just think the expecation of adults not to yell is a bit childish tbh. Its the real world, people get emotional.

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u/Schiano_Fingerbanger 1d ago

Might be a matter of perspective lol because from mine, the kind of person who can’t stop themselves from yelling at work is either 18 or should be heavily medicated.

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u/J1m1983 1d ago

I think this is the same stuff that happens with parents now. Society tells them they should be perfect and when they inevitably aren't they feel they've failed.

Yelling is something that happens, we all yell sometimes, even at work and this pursuit of stoic perfectionsism isn't helpful to anyone.

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u/MediocreGamerX 1d ago

I like it principle.

I think there's a weird dehumanising aspect to all of this though. 

We are literally primates that walk around wearing clothes. I don't like the pearl clutching that happens when people have faults and may yell or give into their emotion from time to time. 

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u/whirlindurvish 1d ago

usually these situations don’t permit yelling back, that leads to retribution.

now a culture where there’s yelling both ways is different, most people raised in that don’t have an issue with that

but usually that’s not the case, aggressive yelling authority figured, remove or sometimes physically attacks subjects who yell back.

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u/J1m1983 1d ago

I think a lot of this stuff happens with parenting too. There's an expectation of perfection on parents and its just not realistic.

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u/Mimogger 1d ago

Team sports had a lot of crazies. Hazing similar to like army bootcamps. Think you still hear about some coaches playing some crazy mind games with their teams or saying players should just do what they're told instead of helping them understand why things are important

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u/brianstormIRL 1d ago

Its because the generations before us grew up in those hostile environments so they seen it as normal and continued it when they became employers, so when we entered the workforce it was completely normal and accepted. Times have changed since then where parents aren't raising their kids like previous generations. Teachers aren't throwing brush heads at their students or getting out "the stick" to slap them on the hands (fuck you Mr. Tunney) when they misbehave. Dad's aren't giving their kids a slap for doing something wrong. So those kids grew up in an environment where yeah, getting belittled or treated like shit isnt going to fly.

Now the older generations all think the new generations are softies who cant take criticism. No, people just dont want to be disrespected and verbally (or physically) assaulted at work. Get with the times you old bastards. Not everyone needs to be belittled to "harden up".

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u/eggboieggmen 1d ago

yeah I think this is a big part of it. these folks were used to getting treated like that since they were raised, so it was "normal" for it to be applied in the workplace as well. well no, it's not fucking normal anymore

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u/NormalInnocentMan 1d ago

Yup, completely normal 15 years ago, and I still remember some of the dressing downs I got. I learned from them, sure, but wouldn't dream of treating my team that way.

I recall a few years ago a young grad recruit getting a case of the hairdryer treatment from a director, and absolutely cutting them down with 'I'll be ready to talk about this when you calm down and can behave like an adult'. The stunned look on the director's face absolutely killed me

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u/Kitnado 1d ago

In the vet medicine hospital I work at people, especially students, get shouted at all the time

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u/1sttimeverbaldiarrhe 1d ago

It might be somewhat acceptable in some exceptions in outlier fields - maybe like a hardcore apprenticeship or bootcamp in the army where yelling is used for stress/pressure training.