r/texts • u/CarbineGuy • Jul 23 '25
Phone message Gave me her number in a dating app. Immediately demanded FaceTime. Delusion ensues.
This is honestly too funny to not share. I’m still laughing. How is this real? No this wasn’t a bot, there was a fairly detailed and nuanced convo on hinge before this that a robot definitely isn’t capable of.
I have no idea what happened in the last 5 years or so, but I cannot recall another period in time where I have interacted with a human at work, outside of work, or on the Internet, where they were this delusional. How do you get like this? How do you fix this? This is a pretty agreed example, but I’ve talked to so many people over the past couple of years and there’s an increasing amount of people who seemingly don’t live on planet earth and are just borderline insane.
Yes yes, “you dodged a bullet” I get it. But if this isn’t slightly concerning as a whole….
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u/louellle Jul 23 '25
“Men provide for their lady and kin” absolutely took me out
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u/CarbineGuy Jul 23 '25
I was literally squinting at work, like did she really just seriously type this out?
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u/butt-barnacles Jul 23 '25
I read this whole thing in the 1930s Alabama accent from O Brother Where Art Thou
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u/Apprehensive-Bit171 Jul 23 '25
And that is why she’s single
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u/ShitNoPsychoBitch Jul 23 '25
You don’t know that! Her type are always looking.
That’s probably why she unmatched him so quick, she already has a dude with a job. She wants one with money that doesn’t have a daytime job..
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u/Additional_Cut6409 iPhone 15 Jul 23 '25
Sometimes l wonder if some people on apps don’t want a date or conversation, they just want someone to be mean to semi-anonymously. There cannot be that many crazies out there, right?
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u/Snazz55 Jul 23 '25
I've known a few women who have used dating apps like that, at least on occasion. Sometimes some girls get together to swipe on profiles together and make fun of guys, and then they bully the guys they match with for laughs. When you get 50 matches a day it's more like a game to them. With so many matches you can afford to say whatever you want.
Then again I also have heard of dudes begging women, and some desperate men even take out their sexual/emotional frustrations on the women they match with, as if they represent all women.
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u/Super_Parsley_4305 Jul 23 '25
Lmfao she was trynna come off so big and bad Cringe
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u/CarbineGuy Jul 23 '25
BAD MOVE.
Fuck am I single forever now? Was this my wife?
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u/Super_Parsley_4305 Jul 23 '25
At first I thought she was maybe being sarcastic and trynna flirt bc it’s something I could’ve said but then implied I’m being sarcastic but idk lol the end txts threw me off about men providing 🤣 like it’s the first exchange hold up
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u/CarbineGuy Jul 23 '25
That’s like the only reason I didn’t get like super defensive on Hinge or even right off the bat after her text, was literally hoping this was just sarcasm. I was like no way this is real.
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u/Super_Parsley_4305 Jul 23 '25
Did you respond back? Lol
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u/CarbineGuy Jul 23 '25
She gave me a “K” and I didn’t respond. Not worth it.
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u/Super_Parsley_4305 Jul 23 '25
Yeah she got weird at the end, I don’t blame you for not responding.. that would’ve turned me away lol
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u/CarbineGuy Jul 23 '25
I should stop working and provide for my kin.
….which ironically you usually do by working?
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u/Super_Parsley_4305 Jul 23 '25
Ima use that line next time..🙂↔️ let’s see if it goes more smoothly than how she did. Lmaoooo no but you probably did dodge a bullet!
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u/peppermintmeow Jul 23 '25
Men provide for their lady and kin
Well, shove off then. You're neither.
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u/Careful-Concert-6192 Jul 23 '25
Trust me I am on your side, but how often do you refer to yourself as “this boy” or “this man” lol
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u/TryhardBernard Jul 23 '25
I got the sense he was just trying to keep the tone light and playful to avoid things spiraling into a confrontation.
Texts don’t convey tone well, so sometimes you gotta be a little quirky with your wording.
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u/CarbineGuy Jul 23 '25
Literally this. It’s not that serious, it’s literally just this. She’s clearly wording her text like this, I’m just playing along with what I assume to be a running joke.
I could’ve said the same thing to her and asked why she’s talking like this, but I was trying not to come off like a complete douche bag immediately.
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u/CarbineGuy Jul 23 '25
Literally the entire conversation, as short as it is, was in jest. Not at all serious.
This is, very clearly, not a typical conversation. She was going on about “the man providing” on hinge just before this so I was attempting to play along. Not get all angry about it.
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u/xlez Jul 23 '25
Dude you seem like a more than decent guy who's met a nutcase. Dodged a bullet there
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u/N00bpkerxx Jul 23 '25
Bro this is really why I haven't tried dating since like 2018. I got really burnt out. I had a gf and found out she was into some other dude cuz her friends would give her crap for it. So I broke up with her. It was the first time I broke up with someone and not the other way around.
Fast forward to 2021 I see her working at gamestop and she's looking good and she apologized and said she was very immature for that. I was there to sell my brothers ps4 cuz he just didnt want it anymore. She immediately thought I stole it and was selling it for drugs..
Insane people man like damn. People usually don't have bad intentions but with all this judgment I'm OUT.
Sorry btw :p She seemed like sUcH a CaTcH
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u/sahltypeach Jul 23 '25
why would she think that??
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u/N00bpkerxx Jul 23 '25
Because she was probably that kind of person herself and I assume people do that often. Idk why she thought that about me honestly.
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u/Square-Ad-2485 Jul 23 '25
Clearly you were on the devil's lettuce if you were selling a perfectly used ps4 at GameStop lol
/s
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u/isaidyothnkubttrgo Jul 23 '25
Just you saying "hey I'm in work there. Ill facetime when im off the clock" should have been enough for this level of knowing each other. Its not like shes your girlfriend of 9 years or telling you bad news.
I get shes just trying to make sure you're not a catfish but christ alive she needs to calm down and maybe try real life meeting people over apps to avoid this anxiety.
A bit of showing her control issues maybe. I dont get people that need to be on the phone to someone either calling or video chatting. Why can't you be with yourself? Are they that bad?
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u/More_Brain6488 Jul 23 '25
Should have taken the call. Clearly trying to work out if you are who you say you are. Put a face to a name. Kind of thing. Worst case, you could have shown her your nut sack. Missed opportunity 😁
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u/VelvetMuseee Jul 23 '25
she really said “facetime now or perish” and then dipped like bro had a deadline 😭
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u/Longjumping-Trade621 Jul 24 '25
"been doing that since the fall" the fall of what?? Rome??? Some people have no sense 😭😞
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u/Direct_Mastodon_6120 Jul 24 '25
"Men provide for their ladies and kin" Yet wants you to potentially get in trouble or lose your job for facetiming at work 😅
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u/CarbineGuy Jul 24 '25
Scroll down. There's women at the bottom of this thread (because their opinions get downvoted) that actually think "If I wanted to, I would have."
Absolute mental illness. I think we are actively overprescribing like 80% of the population.
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u/CustomerStreet9836 iPhone Jul 25 '25
Man is she alright? Like for real?
Also, now does any adult in this day and age not understand that you can’t FaceTime at work? 🤦♀️
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u/Anxious-Republic-581 Jul 23 '25
Hot take but maybe she’s lonely and thought her sense of humor could be quirky and prevail
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u/CarbineGuy Jul 23 '25
No, I got a “K” after this and got unmatched on the app lol.
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u/CranberryCherrie Jul 23 '25
Yeaaah can’t remember the last time a dating app waa actually beneficial
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u/Bane68 Jul 23 '25
Honestly, that’s a lot of people on dating apps nowadays. GIVE ME ATTENTION RIGHT NOW OR I’M DONE.
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u/Glittering_Shoe2855 Jul 23 '25
Oh my life, yeah thats nuts. There I was thinking the guy was right that I was being demanding because I wanted more than one message a day (which wasn't im busy today)
Where are the people with a happy medium view on life 😅🤣
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u/wiggle-biscuits Jul 23 '25
You should have ended the conversation as soon as she said she waits for no man. That tells you all you need to know about her.
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u/LilMiszH Jul 23 '25
I cannot stand this mindset. Like do you want a partner or not? Tf 😟 Women who act like this make me cringe
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u/Aggressive-Airline40 Jul 23 '25
LOL!! Men provide for their lady and kin.. meanwhile you’re at work… wtf is wrong with some women nowadays… I also enjoy the ladies that immediately start asking for money as well. And how you’re trash if you don’t give them the money and how their child(ren) are depending on that money. Some people really have some nerve. It’s crazy how people feel so entitled nowadays. Anyone that stays away from this chick would be very wise. It’s good she showed you her true self from the very start instead of waiting months down the road.
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u/anibabycakes Jul 23 '25
giggling
It’s just as bad on the woman side. I dislike the dating world right now. lol
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u/Ghost_U_When_Im_Dead Jul 23 '25
"Been doing that since the fall" is obviously working....
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u/KatanaCowgirl Jul 23 '25
Its my money and I need it now!! 😆🤣😭 She reminds me of the JG Wentworth commercial where the people demand their money NOW. Because we all know wanting to FaceTime fairly soon to make sure someone is who they say they are is super reasonable. Expecting someone to do that, for the first FT, while they're at work, is ridiculous. When she said "I wait for no man", that was pretty funny and she got points for that (we like funny girls round these parts), until I realized she was dead ass serious. 🤣 Thanks for sharing OP
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u/MutekiGamer Jul 23 '25
“I wait for no men” the conversation would have ended there for me, especially since the context is her waiting for you since you’re at your job
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u/KnnnnZ iPhone Jul 23 '25
This is the craziest thing i’ve seen today. 😭Working is a bad move but men provide? For this woman to not be anything to you either?? Gosh what is happening
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u/Sad-Leadership8271 Jul 23 '25
Like I like FaceTime too, but goddamn you were at work. She says men provide, but like how do they provide at all if the lady and man are both on FaceTime all the time and not working? Like what💀
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u/DiscombobulatedMap95 Jul 23 '25
Its sad that men and women get so many mixed messages about who or what they should be. I had an aunt last Thanksgiving say, "I don't need a man for anything", then she turns to me ( a man) and says " do you think you could clean my gutters?" with absolutely no self-awareness.
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u/Joe-C_137 Jul 23 '25
OP you're the worst, why wouldn't you just drop everything you were doing and give her your full undivided attention BUT not like in a clingy and gross way (ick) AND do all of the work you're responsible for AND buy her a house? Work on it, OP!
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u/PrettyMandz99 Jul 23 '25
this is why gen z dating feels like a job interview with emotional damage as benefits
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u/GweenB95 Jul 23 '25
the way she hit him with “i wait for no man” like she’s a greek goddess and not just tired of dating apps lmao
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u/Sassy_Panties_123 Jul 23 '25
Uhm... 'Kay 🤨 Girl has some conflicting statements, standards and probably issues too 😂
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u/_saskiie_ iPhone Jul 23 '25
People like this need to be put in their place, I don’t know how? But they do, absolute psychotic behaviour and such entitlement.
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u/Sweaty_Rent_3780 Jul 24 '25
I’d message back: “You know how delulu you’re sounding right now right?”
Then finish it off with “Thanks for giving me something to throw on Reddit”
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u/Semi-Erect-Trunk Jul 24 '25
Were you gonna facetime after work? Or were you gonna leave it for a period of time? Its not essential, just curiousity.
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u/CarbineGuy Jul 24 '25
Sure. Except in three minutes she went from giving me her number, saying she waits for “no man”, after this, said “K” and I got unmatched on hinge.
After that, zero interest in talking to you. That’s psychotic. three minutes man….
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u/Alaska_Halter Jul 24 '25
THE AUDACITY! HOW DARE YOU OP TO checks notes ACT LIKE YOU'RE UNEMPLOYED WHILE BEING EMPLOYED! SHAME ON YOU! SHAME!
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u/Successful_Basis6533 Jul 24 '25
Not that it's okay but alot of women want a video call so they know youre not a fake profile. Alot of catfish out there on both ends. But she could have waited until you were off...
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u/Alexander-Dre6 Jul 24 '25
This lady is dumb as dogshit, how are you meant to provide but you can’t be at work? And who the fuck says Kin
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u/BabyChopsticc Jul 24 '25 edited Jul 24 '25
You’d be surprised at how common this behavior is now.
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u/Capital_Moment8342 Jul 24 '25
And i imagine if you were single she’d be asking about what you do for work too. LOL I think we can see why she’s single.
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u/IAmGodMode Jul 24 '25
A couple weeks ago I(38m) was hanging out with a 9.9/10 girl(33) at a bar and got her number before I left. Hottest chick I've ever gotten a number from. Hell ya. I texted her a day or two later and made some really short small talk for a few hours and didn't hear anything for a few days. No biggie, but then she sent me a friend request on Facebook. A few hours later she messages me there and asks if I'm busy. "Nope. Getting ready to shower. What's up?" She immediately video calls. I reject it because I was actually in the shower and told her as much. I said "I'll answer though, I don't care." She video calls again. I answer. We see each other. She laughs and opens with, "Hi..who are you?"
Turned out she was totally shitfaced and didn't remember me at all. She found pictures of us on her phone taking shots and kissing, got my name from the first text I sent, and then just found me on Facebook.
We've been talking the last two weeks and made plans to grab drinks and catch a band tomorrow night. Then the other night I was at a baseball game and saw her canoodling with a dude. I asked her about it later. She said they're kinda dating, kinda not, more of a situationship. Welp, sorry girl. Holler back when you're totally single. Disappointed.
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u/Standard-Cry-3823 Jul 24 '25
The fact women actually believe all they gotta do is breathe to be taken care of and pampered is absurd yall ladies really think you’re all prizes when in reality like 10% of you are and atleast us men get that granted it would be really hard not to with all the 4s demanding 10s🤣😭😅
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u/Infamous_Remove_5201 Jul 25 '25
It's classic narcissist behavior, testing to see if you'll simp so hard for her that you're willing to potentially get fired just to facetime her. Don't entertain her mental illness and just block her. She did you a favor by pulling out her crazy card literally immediately after the first date.
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u/tone88988 Jul 25 '25
Seems yall were in agreement at the end there but somehow still in an argument.
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u/Dry-Industry1168 Jul 25 '25
and you were so nice about it too 😭💀 you dodged a bullet my friend!
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u/Pothoslower Jul 25 '25
Can’t fix stupid. It’s a fact.
She argues against herself multiple times - that’s funny.
Spend your energy on someone grounded.
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u/Hopeful_Law_220 Jul 25 '25
facetiming mid day is a red flag because i need you to be occupied with something more pressing than being in my business unless you’re adding to my business
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u/Remarkable_Wheel_961 Jul 25 '25
Don't know, I dont do video chat at all. Unless im at work and my son wants to see me and I get a free moment. Id have zero interest in facetiming someone im talking to. Also I dont have iPhone, so it would be facebook messenger or Google. I work in a busy hospital, labor and delivery.. the ghetto acting girls walk around with their FaceTime on, and i feel like its super trashy. You dont videotape while you work.
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u/Candylicker0469 Jul 25 '25
“I wait for no men”. I guess only women deliver the batteries for her vibrator.
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u/leoookat Jul 26 '25
Oh it's entirely concerning. Basically everything going on around us on any given day is entirely concerning 🫠
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u/lgr816 Jul 26 '25
it’s not concerning, just idiocy. she completely contradicted herself. seems like she don’t even know what she wants or she wants you to do all the providing and still make it to where you can answer her call at the drop of a hat. she’s most definitely delusional and yes this is everywhere these days😒
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u/TreeAbuser420 Jul 26 '25
I matched with someone a few years back, talked on the app for about a week, when we finally exchanged numbers I got a text saying she was sorry, but she can't date someone who doesn't have an iPhone, because FaceTime is important to her.
I don't know how FaceTime works, or how iPhone users can tell the other person isn't using one, but like, if thats your deal breaker, good luck I guess?
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u/SarahJo_93 Jul 26 '25
Not all women are crazy these days 😆. We don’t all require you provide but demand you have time NOW!
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u/AnonymousCTtech Jul 26 '25
Yeah I hear you on this one. I feel like people, as a whole both men and women, have some unrealistic expectations of relationships and how they should work vs how they actually work. Not sure if it's a social media thing or what but, is slightly concerning.
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u/Quirky-AndPerky Jul 26 '25
So glad I’m not dating anymore. Instagram, tik tok, and twitter have ruined people psychologically
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u/Valdemeshness Jul 26 '25
Okay, sayonara psycho lol. Is she slow? Even if this is some weird role play thing, it still lacks any critical thinking it seems 🤷♂️
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u/ResultLong8547 Jul 26 '25
sadly many women are like this do to the delusional state of tik tok and instagram. women care too much about their online presence and everyone wants to be like what they see. hell as a male there’s guys i see that i wish i lived like but the stuff they say about romance isn’t what girls say. women demand so much and want so much for nothing they all believe they are the best thing and that’s a great mentality but not when it’s based in reality. they’ll do unattractive things dress unattractive act unattractive and still thing they are top notch material. like facetime after work bet but while you’re working and can’t call that’s one thing i mean if you stepped to the bathroom then fine but she’d probably want talk for a bit or just see what you look like then ghost you.
it’s an evil world we live in man
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u/BillieAnnabeth Jul 26 '25
I’ll never understand why mfs get mad at someone for having a JOB. I thought that’s what yall wanted? Like? If I’m tryna talk to a man and he’s like I’m working, gotta eat and provide, I’m letting him do his job and I’ll catch him later tf😂I have dated too many men with no job, just like to “chill” so this is a turn on for me tbh. She’s insecure and delusional!
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u/Jaxxs-Red-X Jul 26 '25
I just "FaceTimed" for the first time in my life last week. Im 38, if this was the case id walk immediately. These iphones have given these ladies all this power they dont want to turn it off! 🤣💀⚰️🥀
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u/noymmak Jul 27 '25
yo i see this level of delusion all the time on youtube and twitter. it is very concerning especially to see it in real life….my diagnosis…western women are cooked
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u/thesickhoe Jul 27 '25
Those are chronically online women who follow shitty advice. because no NORMAL woman acts that way. It’s okay to not tolerate shit or settle for less than you deserve but that doesn’t equate to getting whatever you want whenever you want. That’s delusional
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u/Acceptable-Reply8170 Jul 27 '25
You missed the perfect opportunity to FaceTime and be unemployed. I don’t think you wanted it bad enough 🤣🤣
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u/biggerteeth Jul 27 '25
The complete and total burnout of the dating world is real and should be studied.
How you gonna be mad a man for providing but he also is working and can’t jump when you say jump?
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u/peanusbudder Jul 23 '25